/ic/ - Artwork/Critique

My older sister was diagnosed with stage IV glioblastoma multiforme (the most aggressive brain cancer) and we've told she won't make it to Christmas.

The average glioblastoma sufferer is 64 y/o men. My sister is 30.

We found out 5 weeks ago and my sister still doesn't know she's terminal. Right now she's on her 6th neurosurgery due to complications from a cerebrospinal fluid leak and an infected bone flap which had to be removed. Now she has a giant hole in her skull which brain is exposed through. Right now she's just sleeping, a lot. Like everyday she mostly sleeps, and it was only yesterday that it clicked, "final stages of cancer is decreased consciousness".

My mother has forbidden anybody from telling her because she's frightened that when she finds out that she'll just give up and we'll lose her much, much earlier. I don't feel good about this at all. 3 weeks ago, before she had to go back into hospital I was sat on the sofa next to her, holding her hand and listening to her sob about... how lucky she was. How lucky she was that the surgeons got 95% of the tumour, and that she'll live because of it. How not many people are lucky enough to be given a second chance like this. I smiled to her and nodded, squeezing her hand all the way.

I lied to my dying sister.

This doesn't feel right. I don't like it one bit. Not at all. It makes me feel sick. But if she were told, and then she did just give up, just gave up and died, could we really say that we made the right decision? Is it better for her to spend her remaining days in sleepy, optimistic ignorance or in terror of imminent oblivion?

My first funeral is going to be my sister's. I have never felt pain like this.

Any tips on how to draw from imagination/Create original stuff?

I'm having trouble creating poses/characters/backgrounds etc from imagination,memorizing stuff never helped
Any tips?


Also if someone could give me a good source on human anatomy for drawings it would be appreciated.

If you are going to bring the sticky up please don't bother posting in my thread

Thanks for the help everyone

I'm trying to improve, but lately the choke is real, mid-drawing I start to question how I am holding my pencil or if I should use arm or wrist more, and I ended up trying those different ways, for some reason I lean very close to the paper looking closely at my drawing sometimes, and then I think its fucking retard a and lean back, my hand clenches so strong sometimes and I ask myself ''what is wrong with me?''

I started drawing as a way to relax from all daily stress from college and life but then I get perfectionist/competitive and start to question everything, should do the way I am more naturally comfortable or train myself good habits that go against my comfort zone?

Sometimes I just wish to stop drawing and do something I am good at, like play piano, guitar, writing

Fuck, sorry for the blogpost, just venting because this is getting me mad, and I started drawing to relax

Just fuck my shit up