/ic/ - Artwork/Critique

i decided to try coomer art this week. i made a pixiv and drew and uploaded 7 pictures in 2 days. i have probably jerked off more than 30 times. i dont even feel it anymore. i dont know why i even do it. its just a compulsion every couple hours. i am SO ashamed of my coomer drawings or rather i hate that i have these fetishes. i want to just be a normal person. i want to not have embarrassing secrets. why does something i find horrible make my dick hard? why do i need to jerk off so many time a day? why can't it just be cute girls? if i didnt have to deal with this, i think everything in my life would get better including my art. sad thing is in 2 days the coomer account is already giving my vanilla account which has been up for 2 years a serious run for it's money. i guess it's a niche. people are searching for these hashtags and they forgive technical errors because the content is pretty rare. clearly i struck a cord for a decent number of people. Compared to ig, i just draw portraits and everyday normal stuff. no one cares about it. i rarely crack 10 likes. they are pity likes from friends.

so now i think i could probably monetize my porn. but not the art ive been trying so hard to make.

i really thought if i got the shit out of my system and onto paper maybe i would be able to focus on other things. no it was the opposite. now im just getting more ideas and spending more time drawing porn and jerking off with this fucking smut. And now im afraid someone will see them. before this i never hid any of my drawings. now i have another secret that i have to hide.