/ic/ - Artwork/Critique

here's a cooking recipe to make an Illastrat blotch mess painting:

get your ingredients ready:
- one internet pic of a rapper (or shitty selfie of yourself or your tattoo whale gf)
- a set of random colors, extra tube of pitch black
- brain damage
- small, cheap industrially produced canvas (hobby shop)

>To begin with, run your head into the wall about ten times until you feel terribly dizzy and lightheaded.
>Crop the shit out of your photo
>Now sit down in the corner of your tiny room and throw some random colors on your palette.
>Begin with tracing all outlines of the person in black and make sure to be rubbish at doing so
>Once you're not even halfway finished with your down syndrom version of the person, move on to the background
>Google tablecloth prints, confetti, vaporwave desktop patterns like circles, spirals, checked patterns or old powerpoint backgrounds
>plaster that shit with kindergarten scribbles to fill the emptiness of the background with infantile patterns the way your mind is filled with childish expectations of what a painting can or should be

presentation:
>go on that website where everybody with a sense of taste and reason hates your awful, narcissistic ass
>make a terrible photo with fucked up contrast and whitebalance of the shit you've just smeared all over the canvas
>season with "I am god" - "I'm the best on here" - "is it bc i is black?" - "that painting is ----very successful----"(??? in your living room or what ???) or any other raging stupidity

done, you are Illastrat. ignore constructive criticism and insults.
be sure to come back every other day and do the same thing over and over again, acting like nothing happened.


>Illastrat posts his shit amongst philistines
>gets minimal amount of praise
>posts his shit on a page for artwork and critique, with a bunch of people who actually know something about art production
>gets absolutely BTFO everytime
hmmmm!

post your worst illastrat impressions.

>>3616534
it's genuinely difficult to make an image look this bad.
>>3616530