/ic/ - Artwork/Critique

i dont see any confession threads or whatever up and i feel like im going insane so im using this thread as an outlet, i dont want to make a thread all to myself
i finally got enough space in my life to quit drawing porn. respect to you guys who like doing it, but i hated it, ive hated it for years. all i have wanted is to be free of it. now i am free of it, im living off scraps but im working out and eating better. my mental health is a lot stronger than it was, although not perfect. i figured now i can try approaching drawing as if i was a passionate teenager again, given that i think about art all day i would think i havent fallen out of love with it. but i can barely muster 2 hours of drawing a day, maybe a bit more if im rendering. when i sit down and im there to draw i hardly feel any passion at all. gifts for friends, fan art to try and get followers on my new account, work for myself, studies, none of it makes me feel passionate. i cant tell if im supposed to give up on art or what. today i was drawing something that should be pretty fun for me and i was forcing myself to sit down and work on it, i was aching to do literally anything else. eventually i just went to lay in bed. im scared bros, i love art and i thought i loved drawing but now im having second thoughts. i wanted to start doing commissions again, not porn ones, but i can barely produce a drawing in a week now.