/ic/ - Artwork/Critique

>>4715002
First of. Forgive me if at any point I sound too harsh. I want to give you as much insight as I can, you don't have to agree with everything either.

Your art needs some improvement. Like general anatomy, environment and line-weight. You're at a good foundation to keep moving forward tho. You're using hatching, albeit a bit sloppily, but that will improve with practice.

Your paneling relies a bit too much on close up shots. You have enough space to do a full body on the page your MC appears. You want to show the reader who they'll be following around. Page 8 could use with the camera angle being more zoomed out. We don't see the driver and we don't really see the car. Page 9 where the MC pays for his Taxi, could be combined in one. where the MC is leaning over the car paying. It's more work to draw in panel, but will convey what's happening better. When he turns around towards the skating ring, I'd make that panel bigger. Maybe even a two page spread. Just so we see, what I assume. Is a grand sight for the MC.

There wasn't much dialogue, so it was hard to follow. I don't quite understand the chocolate bit. At this point, I'd wait to critique the rest of the story till I can read more.