/ic/ - Artwork/Critique

I know what I need to do to improve and get better but I can't find the will power to do it anymore. I've been trying again and again since 2014 and it's all just tiresome at this point. I say "today I'm finally going to do it" and end up wasting in on video games and getting my ass kicked in fucking video games.

Here is the thing video games have taught me though, especially fighting games, is that I can play a game for fun and enjoy it so as long as I win here and there while having a laugh. This was my personal rule for as long as I've been playing video games. But I'm getting to the point where just winning "here and there" isn't doing it for me anymore. 9 times out of 10 I lose a match and feel like shit. "why is this guy so much better than me how the FUCK is he spamming that combo over and over? Etc." But I know the reason...

The reason is obvious, they play for hours and practice in tutorial mode all day. They take the time to learn how to play instead of just jumping into a match like me and hoping for the best. That is comparable to drawing. I'm fiddling around with drawing without actually sitting down and doing the real work required. I'm a dabbler who "does things so as long as I felt like I had fun doing it but daydreams of being at the top but doesn't want to do whats needed to reach the top."I know this but I'm too paralyzed to even get started "trying".Because it's confirmation "have I actually TRIED to get better?"