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/fa/ - Fashion

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8249966 No.8249966 [Reply] [Original]

What's the use of being effay if you're an autist?

I look good. I wear good fits. /fa/ certified.
Wherever I go, people are mirin my fit, especially qts.

However, I am an absolute autist. I can't do small talk, I can't flirt, I can't stand being in public. What's the use of being effay? People looking at me just makes me sperg harder.

How do you deal with it, /fa/ ?

>> No.8249974

>>8249966
its a personal hobby, not necessarily social

be like narcissus

>> No.8249975

>>8249966
because you'd feel even worse if you didn't like the clothes you were wearing

>> No.8249976

Quit being a manlet.

>> No.8249986

>>8249976
I'm 6ft

whatever 4chan may say, that is not manlet height

>> No.8249994

>>8249974
>its a personal hobby, not necessarily social
Pretty much. I'm into this because I find it interesting, not because I want to use it to talk to people.

(although the dream is to meet likeminded individuals who will become my /fa/ friends)

>> No.8250014

>>8249966
Go out to parties, get drunk, talk to people. Fake it till you make it.

>> No.8250022

>>8250014
that ain't my style

I don't associate with plebs

>> No.8250024

Get off the computer/mobile.

>> No.8250026
File: 154 KB, 926x482, fa meet.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
8250026

>>8249994

>> No.8250036

>>8250022
You're assuming that you're not a pleb..
>b-but muh avant garde fashion
>b-but muh impeccable taste in architecture
>b-but muh exquisite art preferences
Lol, you're on 4chan.org buddy. You're a social outcast and people laugh at you.

>> No.8250040

>>8249966
I can relate. I think I look rather good, but my social skills are absolutely shit. I have like two friends and basically no social life whatsoever. The last time I left my home on weekends was like two years ago. I feel like I'm barely alive.

Actually, I'm taking these antidepressants atm and one side effect is vivid dreaming and strong dream memorisation. The thing is, I'm mixing up reality with my dreams because there's just so much more happening when I'm asleep. It's really weird.

>>8250014
I wish it was that easy.

>> No.8250042

Stop complaining. If you look good, you don't need to be extremely charismatic to pull off mad pussy (or dick)

>> No.8250049

>>8250036
I'm a certified patrician in all of the arts m8
>>8250040
are you me? though I don't take antidepressants
>>8250042
that's the whole problem m8

>> No.8250052

>>8250040
>i wish it was that easy

Just fucking do it. Take those two friends of yours and head for the nearest club or pub. Just don't analyse anything, it's the worst thing you can do in a place like that
>do i look okay?
>are they laughing at me?
>this guy propably thinks im an autist
>did she really found my joke funny?
>where is Carl?

If you avoid overthinking, i guarantee you'll enjoy yourself.

>> No.8250136

>started going out
>found social circle
>got compliments on my personal style, several girls straight up said I look handsome
>feeling more confident now
>ended up in couple of group photos
>saw myself
>jesus christ I look fucking horrible
>no confidence anymore, don't want to get out of my room and talk to people

Thanks for raising my personal standarts all the way to male supermodel tier, /fa/

>> No.8250189

Social skill is a muscle, you can train it. Take it or leave it,
Dale Carnegie.

/http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/How_to_Win_Friends_and_Influence_People

>> No.8250199

>>8250136
Quit being a bitch and either accept how you look or improve it.

>> No.8250201

>>8250136
>this
Holy fucking feels. Even worse
>check self out in rear view mirror
>looking fucking Lachowski tier
>walk to wherever it is you're going
>catch reflection
>absolutely disgusting

>> No.8250213

>>8249966
post picture you faget
>I look good
>I wear good fits
>/fa/ certified
yeah right

>> No.8250222

>>8250213
if you dont believe me, dont believe me, but i dont have any pics atm

why would i lie anyway, it wouldnt benefit me

>> No.8250229

>>8250189
that book sucks and is full of common sense. It seems like it would help psychopaths pretend to be normal more than autists with their social lives.

>> No.8250253

Stop using the word autist/autistic unironically. You are likely not genuinely autistic unless you've been diagnosed. I understand using the word as a joke, but if you're seriously using that word to describe personality traits that have very little to do with autism, you make yourself look like an utter pleb.

>> No.8250257

>>8250253
>>>/reddit/

>> No.8250269

>>8250253
>>8250257
R E K T
E
K
T

>> No.8250432

how do I into small talk?
I'm great at like giving speeches and I dance with girls at parties at shit but I can't make small talk, even with other guys. I just don't have anything worthwhile to say.

>asking 4chan for advice

>> No.8250477

>>8249994
we'll all make it some day anon

>> No.8250478

>>8250432
same here bro, the problem with me is that i live by the philosophy that if you have nothing to say, you dont say anything. I cant stand meaningless chatter

>> No.8250486

>>8250432
Sounds like you've got no real problem.

>> No.8250495

>>8250432
thing is that most of 4chan people and the likes (social autists, whatever) treat conversations as a strict information exchange act. whereas normal human beings (read plebs) just do it for the sake of socializing, having good time, etc. it doesnt really matter what you say, as long as it's not something offensive, but rather how you say it. emotions, intonation, you also have to defend yourself when joked at, not completely surrender to it like a beta faggot, but rather turning it around, and maybe back to the joking person, etc.

I hope this shit makes sense.

>> No.8250510

>>8250049
>I'm a certified patrician in all of the arts m8

can we already stop this arbitrary delusion meme speak already

it's like saying you're cool

no one who is cool tells others that they're cool because they don't need the validation, that's what makes them cool

>> No.8250523

>>8250510
im 'speaking' to an anonymous faggot sitting in front of a computer, much like myself, I can say whatever I want
Obviously I wouldn't say that to anyone IRL

>> No.8250562

>>8250486
i'm fine at talking when there's something that interests me. when i spot a qt across the room, i have nothing to start the conversation.

>> No.8250568

>>8250523
>I can say whatever I want
no shit

doesn't change what i said was true

>Obviously I wouldn't say that to anyone IRL
really don't understand why people change their vocabulary from online vs. irl
if you're OP, a good step is to practice how you speak socially when online
from my experience, irl people with web personas suck because one personality brings down their other personality

>> No.8250572

>>8250568
because there's a massive difference between face to face and computer to computer 'conversation'

Conversation adapts to the situation m8

>> No.8250585

>>8250495
I see what you mean, I just have nothing to say. Like, here's a random hot girl, I'll introduce myself and then nothing.

>> No.8250586

>>8250572
so quit relying on the computer as a crutch to hide your conversational/public insecurities, stop overthinking and chill

don't get me wrong dude, i'm neurotic as shit too but i know most people don't care or notice

do you have any friends at all? does the people populating your area suck?

>> No.8250589

>>8249966
I relate dude, I'm 20 years old and I have like one good friend. I have a girlfriend which is cool and I'm grateful for that but my social circle is fucking shit. it sucks because I really enjoy fashion as a hobby but I rarely go out with a bunch of people, just my girlfriend who doesn't dress bad but really basic and my one good friend who used to be really into fashion but kinda grew out of it. not that that stuff really matters, I'm just saying I rarely get to wear all the clothes I want unless I go out into the city by myself, and even then I just feel weird around people I don't know and I'm self conscious most if the time. my circumstances are kinda weird cause I was into drugs and shit in high school and then was in this sober group that I've now left, but I really don't have any idea how to start over socially. I'm moving to Seattle with my girlfriend in a few months so hopefully I can just start over and meet new people but I feel like all the time I spend on my computer has turned me into a socially awkward fuck, sorry for the rant.

>> No.8250593

>>8250586
I live in a wealthy neighbourhood full of arrogant jews.
Friends-wise, I have one relatively close friend, but he lives in another part of town, which is quite far away (i live in London)

>> No.8250597

>>8250589
>sorry for the rant

no need to be sorry man, this is what the thread is for, i feel you

>> No.8250653

>>8249966
1 mg klonopin + 20 mg lexapro daily

enjoy being a patrician

>> No.8252567

>>8249966
I'm similar, but not even that attractive, not that autistic to think I'm better than others because of internet knowledge and MUH RICK.
just be kind and respectful to people, dont take shit and learn to like yourself. lil b certified

>> No.8252611
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8252611

>>8250589
Here's the deal kid, you have to leave your comfort-zone. It WILL be painful (trust me I know, i can relate to your story) but it has to be done. Think about how you'd like people to interact with you. Don't you also wish somebody would strike a conversation at random, compliment your fit or just talk? You must give to get. I'm not saying you should compliment every human being. But when you spot/meet somebody interesting next time, step out of your own box for a minute and I'll GUARANTEE you will find peace in yourself.

>> No.8252639

If you're actually autistic there's not really any hope.

If you're using the term autistic in place of introverted/socially anxious, just expose yourself to social situations more often.

>> No.8252655

>>8250589
Exact same situation man. One friend, one girlfriend. No one else, I don't even know why I buy nice clothes, my girlfriend dresses like shit, and my friend is a sailor and doesn't give a fuck about dressing well.

I actually do know why I buy clothes, it's because I'm in a vapid relationship, depressed, and searching for a purpose in life.

So, you know, your average twenty year old. I suppose buying a nice shirt once every month or two is better than being an alcoholic.

>> No.8252659

>>8252655
b-but being an alcoholic is very effay!

>> No.8252665

>>8252659
My dad drank himself to death, and by the end of it he'd lost his mind on the sauce, that's not very /fa/.

>> No.8252669

>>8252665
arguably

>> No.8252670

>>8252669
Nah, trust me man, I saw the state he was in. That's not /fa/.

>> No.8252676

>>8249966
>get laid
>exercise
>eat healthy
>read
>drink lots of water
>visit returnofkings dot com

>> No.8252703

>>8252676
>get laid

that's the problem right there

>> No.8254206

>>8252655
w-we are both gonna make it anon. email me sometime if u want.

>> No.8254226

>>8250589
>>8252655
How the fuck do you manage to get girlfriends while basically being neets? I've been dragging myself out every week for the last 5 months but I've never got past the one night stand stage (and it was only twice anyway).

>> No.8254243

>>8254226
I'm the first guy, I'm not completely neet, I work full time at a coffee shop and I was friends with my girlfriend before we started dating. My only advice is to talk to girls you know and get to know them/befriend them. I don't have that much experience cause I've only seriously dated two girls, but the first girl was one of those dating things where I didn't really know her and it just started off with sex and ended really badly. Good luck anon.

>> No.8254284

>>8249966
try to stop being so damn self-conscious, and don't try to act a certain way, be you

>i can't this i can't that
yes you can
what is holding you back anon

>> No.8254289

>>8254226
Not a neet, I'm in school, and have plenty of money. I just don't trust people because I grew up with incredibly shitty people.

Also I'm above average looking, so that probably helps.

>> No.8254290

>>8254243
forgot to mention that I worked with her at the coffee shop, that's how I met her. I don't think it's always necessary to go out and chase strangers and try and "get" a girlfriend. it's better to just be a nice dude and befriend girls and let stuff naturally happen. idk hope that helped.

>> No.8254318

I've been diagnosed with social anxiety disorder and Asperger syndrome. Some of the /fa/ basics guides have really helped me out. It can be a problem because I can't always tell when the people here are being ironic. Wearing a decent shirt instead of what my parents buy me has been good. I feel more confident but sometimes people expect more of me. They must think I dress okay so I can talk okay. I can fake it to a point but then I stumble and it becomes difficult. Sometimes I think it might be better to dress poorly then people are more likely to leave me alone. I do want to talk to people but only if it's comfortable for me.

>> No.8254466

>>8254318
How do you know if you have aspergers?

>> No.8254480

>>8249966
>/fa/ certified
And there's the problem. If you dress like these homos tell you to you'll look like a faggot no wonder you have no friends or women.

>> No.8254491

>>8254466
My psychiatrist referred me to a specialist autism team. They did an initial test which consisted of puzzles, describing certain situations, and so on, then over the next few months they did more specific things like asking about my childhood development and personal preferences.

I doubted it at first. A lot of things definitely "clicked" but I chalked it up to personality rather than Asperger syndrome. Then they told me how neurotypical think and how different it is to me, and it was mind-blowing. I always assumed everyone was just like me, but pretended not to be, like I had been doing.

>> No.8254504

>>8254491
The autism spectrum is fucking massive nowadays you probably have a pretty mild case.

>> No.8254517

>>8254504
I think it's valid. There's no reason it has to be so binary as "you have autism" or "you do not have autism", people can be "a little bit" autistic.

This applies to plenty of mental disorders. It's why we have criteria like in the DSM. Everyone gets sad, but only at a certain point does it become depression.

At this point I believe I am "autistic enough" to have Asperger syndrome. It did require something of a paradigm shift, but it's not like I've been brainwashed. My thoughts and thought patterns are the same as they were before I even know what Asperger syndrome was.

>> No.8254544

>>8254517
I agree that it's valid, it's just a massive spectrum.

>> No.8254548

to placate your crippling self-consciousness

in my experience

>> No.8254568

>>8250495

> feeling the need to retaliate when someone makes a joke
> being this beta
> actually believing being extremely sensitive to a joke is alpha

>> No.8254569

>>8254517
Can you describe some of your tendencies or qualities which you didn't think we're in that spectrum, but are?

>> No.8254573

>>8254544
All right. I agree that it's mild. I've met people who are far worse than me. My upbringing helped. If my parents had realized something was wrong at a young age and taken me to see a psychiatrist, it could have gone much worse. I would have went to some specialist school and not learned about things I now understand fairly well. Thank you parents for being ignorant.

But one of the big distinctions people fail to make is between Asperger syndrome and classical autism (with its co-morbid disorders). Autism really only refers to the social and communication aspects. A lot of children with classical autism also have a learning disability (formerly "mental retardation") which many people seem to assume is a part of autism itself.

>> No.8254575

>>8254569
Can you rephrase that question? I don't understand.

Are you asking what makes me autistic compared to neurotypical people?

>> No.8254599

>>8254575
Yes mate.

Maybe I'm autistic, I have trouble explaining things.

>> No.8254715

>>8254284
social anxiety

>> No.8254733

>tfw you are hit by the sudden realisation that you have no idea how relationships work
>Like if someone told you they'd give you ten grand to find a girlfriend by next month, you couldn't do it: you don't have a clue where you'd start
>Tfw you've written relationships off as something that happens to "normal people" while you've just plodded on with your college work

>> No.8254744

>>8254733
Do you need a relationship?

Sour grapes aside, if you've ignored finding a relationship like this, maybe it's not all that important.

>> No.8254792

>>8250201
>>8250136
i always think i look good in mirrors and then in photos i instantly turn in to a disgusting 2/10

>> No.8254808

>>8254792
>about to look in the mirror
>fix hair
>make sure I'm clean
>adjust clothing appropriately
>pose well
>9/10

>impromptu photograph
>messy hair
>spots and dirt everywhere
>clothing looks like shit
>look surprised and standing weirdly
>1/10

fuck

>> No.8254810

>>8254792
I have exact opposite
I think I am disgusting ugly fuck and these thoughts are justified I think
but then in photos I look like a 8/10, get compliments and people are asking who I am etc

>> No.8254825

>>8254792
oh god iktf
my face is very asymmetrical and somehow my mind blinds me to this in the mirror

>> No.8254844
File: 33 KB, 480x205, image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
8254844

Let go of your feelings

>> No.8254864

I have realized i am super, duper aware of everything i say..its like im observing myself as i interact socially...what does this mean? Is everybody like this? Or am i too self-conscious?

>> No.8254869

>>8254864
wikipedia.org/wiki/Depersonalization

iktf

>> No.8254870

>>8254864
It's a side effect of finasteride.

>> No.8254873

>>8254870
top fucking lel

>> No.8254878

>>8254869
This (along with derealization) always freaks me out. Life suddenly feels like a dream or something. It's like a video game. And like a video game, what if I decide there are no "real" consequences, so I just do whatever? Then people will misinterpret it as "video games cause violence" and I'll ruin everything for everyone.

>> No.8254880

>>8254878
so don't fuck up Anon
I like my video games, and I will hate you for it

>> No.8254883

>>8254869
so what do?

>> No.8254886

>>8254883
despair

>> No.8254897

>>8254880
But it'd be the same in the 1800s. I'd just describe it as like a story or a dream or something.

Except I'm paranoid as fuck in my dreams. Whenever I have lucid dreams, I'm always too scared to do anything too crazy. "Wh-what if it's not actually a dream?"

>> No.8254900

>>8254897
If there are genuinely times when you have serious doubts about whether or not something is real life, I would honestly recommend you see a professional.

>> No.8254904

>>8254869
the world doesn't feel vague, or dreamlike or whatever though..i don't think im suffering with 'depersonalisation' just a lot of thought goes in to what i say. Conversation doesn't really flow naturally with most people, to be honest though people don't generally have anything worthwile to say to one another, so making up shit takes effort. I don't want to start labelling myself a certain way, could make a small problem into a big one.

>> No.8254910

>>8254904
Sounds like you're just mad self conscious

in the same boat

I'll let you know when I find a solution

>> No.8254917

>>8254870
This shit happens to me and I don't take anything
>>8254900
It's an incredibly hard thing to explain you really can't know it until it happens to you. For me at least I know it's real life but, it doesn't feel like it is. It usually happens when I'm tired and going to bed.

>> No.8254919

>>8254910
yeah i really am, though i just wonder how 'self-concious' people are generally. Obviously everybody is aware of themselves and what theyre saying, doing etc to a certain extent

>> No.8254929

>>8254917
Then it sounds like you're just sleepy

>>8254919
Yeah, that's the big question. The scariest idea is that everybody is like this, and nobody admits it.

>> No.8254944

>>8254900
It's not that it doesn't feel like "real life", it's just that I feel like I'm outside myself or something. Like I'm in virtual reality or a video game or a play. Nothing that specific, just the same sort of feeling.

Sometimes I worry I might do something bad, but I never do. I just walk around with less self-awareness. Worst case scenario, I look like I'm on drugs to some random passers-by.

>> No.8254949

>>8254929
the biggest problem for me is, that i don't really enjoy the person (me) im 'observing', he really kinda grates. :/

>> No.8254954

>>8250589
I live right next to Seattle and go there all the time and let me tell you, most people want nothing to do with making friends after they're out of school. You can make friends but expect the cold shoulder often, especially when it's not summer.

>> No.8254960

>>8250022
the fact that you believe this is why you're an autist

stop being so arrogant

you are not a 'patrician'

you are not better than the average person

believing you are and acting as such will hurt your social life

>>8250572
dude, no, this is not how it works

if you are wildly different online than in person you ARE FAKING HOW YOU ARE IN PERSON

DO NOT DO THIS

OTHER PEOPLE CAN SMELL IT ON YOU

again, you are not better than other people because you don't drink, if you think you are, you have autism

if you "don't associate with plebs" those plebs don't want to associate with you either

just fake not being a faggot and you'll do fine

>> No.8254961

>>8254944
there's an actual condition called depersonalization disorder that you could possibly have. now, i don't condone slapping labels and disorders on oneself just to be a special snowflake, but here you go

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Depersonalization_disorder

>> No.8254975

>>8254961
we've covered this

>> No.8254974

>>8250432
develop interests

find out what you have in common together

listen to what they say, ask follow up questions, dont just mull over what you want to say when they are talking

if you take an interest in what people have to say and respond using your brain they will like you

small talk is all about finding a conversation, once its found, just let it flow naturally

you - "so I'm anon, whats your name?" you - "oh thats cool, my brother has the same name, you german or something?"
you - "really? you have a big family too? isn't it just the worst?"

you - "nice weather we're having"
you - "yeah I heard the same about the forecast, good thing too, Im considering going hiking over the weekend, you like to hike?"
you - "oh thats cool, tell me more about X thing you just said"

you should always be looking to move the conversation forward

>> No.8254979

>>8250432
and don't be worried to let the conversation die

it WILL happen, and if its not going anywhere, just let it happen

>> No.8254986

>>8254961
Nah, it's this but it's not that recurrent. Maybe once every few months at random. I think it probably happens to a lot of people, but they just forget about it or don't care so much.

>> No.8254992

people don't get it
your look means fuck all if you don't act how you look
you look ten times more autistic if you dress differently from the public visibly and can't be socially competent.

and it's very likely that an autist doesn't dress guud, he simply views himself as a good dresser, because he's autistic and has no feedback. because he's autistic.

>>8249974
you're autistic too.

>> No.8254997

>trying to figure out how to real life
>play The Sims
>"Well, it's based on real life"
>IRL walk up to random girl
>start talking about airplanes and vampires
>she freaks out and literally runs away

Strangely enough this also sometimes happens to my characters in The Sims, so this experiment was pretty inconclusive.

>> No.8255012

>>8254960
I'm glad the plebs don't wanna associate with me, I'm not complaining about that at all

>> No.8255054
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8255054

>>8249966
Certain people I'm available to be myself around and they actually enjoy my company but for whatever reason, 99.9999% of humans I just simply repel for whatever reason.

Like, I can talk with them just fine, but they don't want to be in any sort of relationship with me at all, whether that be platonic or otherwise. I don't have issues getting female attention or getting a gf, as a matter of fact I've always gotten a gf relatively easily and they're always puzzled as to why I have no friends because they express how much they like hanging out with me, but slowly I begin to think they don't like me and the relationship ends. I think it may be because I have a negative self-image usually. I kind of dislike myself and think others aren't interested in me either, this might somehow be projected to others and push them away. I always get paranoid too, like when I used to have friends I'd always think "they probably hate me, they don't want me around, I'm just a background character for them" or in a relationship, "she's bored with me, she's probably interested in another guy, she's probably cheating on me..." etc.

I don't know how to fix this. I don't know how to genuinely like myself. I think that may be why I got into fashion, I thought it would make me feel comfortable in my own skin but it hasn't thus far.

>> No.8255061

>tfw can't go in my room because there's a bee in there

>> No.8255066

>>8249974
>>8249994
These are the people who should be here. Not faggots who only dress good to try and fit in or to lose their virginity.

>> No.8255068

>>8255054
Welcome to the /fa/ life

>> No.8255073

>>8254929
I don't want to sound condescending but, it's definitely not just being sleepy. I could write novels about it and the types of things that trigger it.

>> No.8255085

>>8255054
know many of these feels. Just gonna try and not be bothered by any of this. Thinking too much makes everything worse

>> No.8255092

>>8250189
Carnegie is a hack and a product of the modernist era. Take no heed of this trash.

>> No.8255098

>>8254954
where do u live? I'm not moving to exactly Seattle I'm moving to Olympia Washington

>> No.8255103

>>8254599
For Asperger's there are a few distinct criteria:
>audiosensory uncomfort
>deep interests in something
And most importantly for you I guess is:
>lack of inherent social skills
This means that whereas most people develop societal skills from being a toddler, some people aren't able to, and they often have to be learnt, such in the way of reading a text book.

>> No.8255113

>>8252670
damn you really are autistic

>> No.8255123

>>8254491
>specialist autism team
I lol'd hard at this

>> No.8255124

there's no 'use' for being /fa/, you idiot. only the sperglords on reddit are interested in fashion because they're trying to attract women and look less like basement dwelling weirdos; 99% of people who are seriously interested in fashion do it because they love the clothing, they love the art and care that goes into making it, and they want to own that art and display it on their bodies. people get the misconception that the reason /fa/ people try to be fit and look somewhat handsome is because the whole goal is to look good; having a decent body and haircut and posture isn't about looking good for other people, it's about respecting the clothing you're wearing- it's about deserving to be a walking mannequin for a piece of really beautiful clothing. same goes for putting together good outfits; it's about respecting the clothes because you recognize the beauty in them.

what i'm saying is you're approaching fashion only with the mindset of impressing other people or cleaning up your image, just read the sticky and shop at h&m forever, there's no need to try and become /fa/. i don't mean that condescendingly either, it might really just not be what you're looking for

>> No.8255133

>>8254733
>Tfw you've written relationships off as something that happens to "normal people"
Damn nigga I know this feel too well

>> No.8255136

>>8255068
I don't like it, I want off the ride.

>> No.8255137

>>8255124
OP here
i hear you, i dont dress well to impress people, I dress well because I enjoy dressing well

im just saying it attracts unnecessary attention and makes me sperg harder

>> No.8255151

>>8255054
>I always get paranoid too, like when I used to have friends I'd always think "they probably hate me, they don't want me around, I'm just a background character for them" or in a relationship, "she's bored with me, she's probably interested in another guy, she's probably cheating on me..." etc.

^ the downfall of my social life

>> No.8255165

>>8255098
Not that anon but
Olympia is kinda a ways from Seattle.

I'm from Bellingham if u want a friend 2 hours north :)

>> No.8255172

>>8255103
What made you uncomfortable?

>> No.8255184

>>8255165
sure :)

email me and we can talk about Seattle/WA related things

>> No.8257108

>>8255054
Dude, you're worth their time man. You've also got to strive to improve yourself man. I definitely know a guy like you, you can almost hear him thinking "i should go now, they've got things to do", that's exactly the thing you SHOULDN'T do. You've got to force yourself upon others a bit, not really, but that's how it will feel like to you.

>> No.8257141

>>8249966
try nofap

deadass after like 3-4 days i started to be a lot better at talking to grills

seriously try it for a week you have nothing to lose

>> No.8257159
File: 33 KB, 470x400, fidel-castro-and-cigar-smoking-gallery.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
8257159

Imagine you're a qt walking down a deserted street, it's the dead of night and a weekend and you know there is creeps out.
Coming your way in the opposite direction is a man that is at least six inches taller than you and quite a lot heavier.
Choose your own adventure:

*The man is dressed in a soiled tracksuit. He wears a beanie pulled low on his forehead and a frown on his face. He is unshaven and his skin is oily and spotty.
*The man is dressed in Rick Owens. He waddles a little bit because of the drop crotch trousers. He looks like he may partake of the cock. His skin is clear and... is he wearing eyeliner? He looks nervous as if he is expecting Basketball Americans to roll him for his chunky shoes at any moment.

Fashion intelligence and good grooming simply communicate good things to other people.
You'll still be an autist and you won't necessary get any pussy: but you are telling people you are concerned with how you appear to others, that you make an effort to present yourself well and that you have the income to do so.
You'll notice that junkies and violent criminals typically do not have good grooming or dress sense.

>> No.8257163

>>8257141
i did nofap for a month last summer, I did feel a lot better and was very confident, but that was likely due to me being in different surroundings to normally and sort of having a gf

>> No.8257179

>>8257141
>tfw been trying it and giving it up for over a year

fuck

>> No.8257226

>>8257179
>tfw been trying and giving it up for over a year
>intervals getting longer and longer
>now fap maybe once every two weeks, almost no porn

Made it
bam

>> No.8257892

>>8257141
>tfw fap all day and can talk to girls no prob

lmao you fuckin losers

>> No.8257914

>>8257226
its that fucking Russian porn man and the anal with those stupidly hot teens, keeps breaking my run. So jelly of that dark, shaven head dude who seems to be in every damn video

>> No.8257990

>>8257914
same fucking here man, that shit worries me sometimes though cause even though it's all on legit websites and it says they are 18 a lot of them look so young, maybe just makeup idk

>> No.8258038
File: 16 KB, 250x232, 1396172173447.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
8258038

>>8257990
y-yes...just m-makeup, that's it!

>> No.8258212

>>8258038
fuck this I'm doing no fap again. the few minutes of pleasure don't measure up to all this shit.

>> No.8258230

>>8257914
>>8257990
keywords?

>> No.8258248

>>8258230
sexy Russian teen alia. Pornhub. U fap u lose, i just did :3

>> No.8258259

>>8258248
nice cock. Thx i came fast

girl here btw

>> No.8258277

>>8258248
thanks m8, I fap so rarely these days I might as well treat myself to something nice when I do.

>> No.8258301

>>8258277
there's better than her tbf but it features the guy i was talking about. What a bastard.

>> No.8258342

What I think a lot of people forget is that at the end of the day, no matter how you dress or act or feel, everybody else bleeds the same blood and breathes the same air, we are not all so different. What you think someone else is thinking about you they might also be thinking YOU are thinking about THEM.

The solution to this problem is to not think that way, and to do that we have to accept the fact that we as people MUST have things wrong with us, and therefore faltering in an area that you're striving for perfection in (eg being social, dressing well, etc) is not something to be ashamed of because no matter how hard you try, you MUST fail; that is only way to succeed.

Don't be afraid of giving life your best shot.

>> No.8259749

>>8254960
>OTHER PEOPLE CAN SMELL IT ON YOU
So that's why it seems people detect almost instantly there's something inherently "wrong" with me

I really have to kill my internet persona, it's only bringing me down

>> No.8259787

>>8255054
You have the same fucking story as me, and it's killing me. The worst part is that I used to be really fucking tight with a bunch of these fellows, and some of them even looked up to me. But between then and now, they've all left me, and I feel like an asshole and also like a fucking loser because I'm never invited to shit, and no matter how fucking hard I try to act chummy around them, I somehow get fucking cut off. I've even developed an anxiety of speaking because of this shit, and I'm paranoid, just you mentioned. I feel betrayed by my old friends, and I'm not close to my new friends, even though I try. I'm all kinds of fucked up, and I hate it. At least I'm talking to this one girl who seems to like me, and she's very pretty and fun to talk to. I'm failing school, and I'm seriously starting to consider ending myself, I feel absolutely fucking horrid. My eating habits are spiraling out of control, I'm getting fatter and developing heavy acne, and I'm starting to think about the true meaning of life and other depressing, antisocial, existential bullshit. I'm fucking scared.

>> No.8259815

>>8250253
>>8250257
>>8250269
lel

>> No.8259820

>>8249966
>no confidence

then you are not /fa/

>> No.8259885

>>8250229
It's definitely the first book I'd recommend to anyone who wants to manipulate people

>> No.8259901

>>8255137
that makes sense then, i was assuming it was the other way around. generally speaking people might look at you sort of weird for having it as an interest if you don't seem like the type, but the 'type' popularly is really just "rich or gay".
i mean dressing well at all will get you some degree of attention, but i think the thing to remember is to dress according to who you are and what your situation is; if you live in manhattan, for example, you can go wild, but if you're a college student in rural montana you're going to look kind of stupid waddling across the quad in full Rick with tumbleweeds rolling by. minimizing this kind of thing will keep away negative attention

like i really wish i could get away with deep drop crotch sweats but i go to school in rural, upstate new york, so i know i'm going to get nothing but negative attention for that kind of thing and tailor my wardrobe accordingly. i've personally gotten nothing but positive attention because of this, you know? like opt for an oversized floral print shirt instead of a rick owens sheer silk geo-leotard with j-shaped dick holster

>> No.8260219

I'm on the other side of the coin.

Fashion and vanity has turned me into an attention enjoying, big headed, narcissistic, egomaniacal fuck.

At first it helped with [buzzword]confidence[/buzzword] but then I took it too far. I was 16 (19 now) and I picked up a bad habit of making people my bitches.
>be in geometry
>teacher is the least assertive person ever and it's his first year teaching
>Talk for the entire class period, text, get up and take a walk around the classroom during a lecture just because I feel like it, leave whenever the hell I want and come back 20 minutes later. I'm very vocal. I make all the jokes, I'm the funny guy; I talk everyone up, they all know me. It's not his class, it's mine.
>Make my mom my bitch.
>Become sexist. I get girls attached, then if I don't get what I want I say something like "My presence is a present" or "You're lucky I'm even here" then leave. When (not if) they come back I ask if they're ready to apologize, etc.
>People love me, they also rarely call me out on being the asshole I am. If they did, I'd usually agree with them. "The crown fits, and I'll wear it with pride."
>Thought everyone was trying to impress me

Choose a side, I guess.

>> No.8260230

Take benadryl. No social anxiety will remain.

You will be talkative and charismatic.

>> No.8260299

>>8260230
What? There's no pharmacological reason DPH would make you talkative and charismatic. If anything, it would make you drowsy and irritable.

>> No.8260655

>>8254792
Digital cameras aren't very flattering for people

>> No.8260661

>>8259787
How often do you invite THEM to do shit? They might feel they're putting in all the work in the relationship. How about you invite them to a bar/somewhere you guys already go often?

>> No.8263014

iktf

>> No.8263060

>not completely autistic
>maybe a little bit
>but able to talk to girls
>be flirting with qt3.14 at work
>don't seal the deal
>this goes on for months
>people say she's into me
>kek no she's not how could she be
>find it impossible to believe someone could actually find me attractive

>> No.8263254

>>8260299
Sorry I can't give you a pharmacological reason, but it's a magic bullet for me and many others.

Google it.

>> No.8263483

>>8260230
>>8263254
>Benadryl

Are you serious anon?

It's marketed as a hayfever releief medication over here.

>> No.8263915
File: 63 KB, 960x764, 181860_449714948373724_1210071133_n.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
8263915

I'm one of the easiest people to talk to. I've been told before that I have a soothing voice and never have had trouble getting a girlfriend or attracting a girl that I had my sights on. My problem is breaking the ice, talking to someone out of the blue and overall flirting. Small talk is unbelievably annoying. I also come off as an overly opinionated asshole. Whatever. I like myself.

>> No.8263987

>>8263060
iktf

>> No.8263998

>>8250040
what are you taking? That sounds pretty fun when you are feeling that your life is boring as fuck

>> No.8264098

>>8254974
i find it annoying when people start asking a lot of shit about you just for the sake of having a conersation, if you dont havre anything interesting to say, shut your reeking anus and fuck off

>oi guis are you enjoying ur meal?
>yeah thanks
>how is it?
>fine, thanks
>do you want anything else
the table is full of condiments and our glasses are full
>no thanks
>fun day innit?
>y-yeah

fucking Hooters, the food is great but the bitches are annoying as fuck||

>> No.8264113

>>8254997
kek, when i was younger i used to play the sims to learn how to actually interact with people because my fathers didnt teached me that much

i learned that you have to be all cool and keep talking a lot if you want to make friends, or give them something

>> No.8264117

>>8263915
that sounds like thd runk version of myself

>> No.8264152

>>8260230

benadryl only sedates me but maybe it calms some sort of anxiety. doesn't really help me thought. probably would knock me out for a couple hours.

>goes to a party
>sleeps on the couch for 4 hours
>enough socializing for a week

>> No.8264194

>>8259787
Other anon is right. Not that I'm in much a position to speak because I've been in the same shitty hole for a while now. I've got a qt.gf and and stuff but I'm fucking failing, think she's gonna leave me, think all of my friends actually hate me.. But really what you've gotta TRY at least is inviting other people out. We don't realize it often, but if you're anything like me and probably most of these people.. you've probably very seldom invited others to do things with you, and just expected that they'd invite you. Then when they didn't, you got sad. But maybe they're thinking the same thing. Either they're gonna sit there and be sad though, or they're gonna go hang out with someone else. That's really what I've found it comes down to. I'm just too stuck in my own head to even invite other people to hang out, but honestly since I started doing that I've realized that deep down I know that my friends actually like me. That's why I think they're my fucking friends. That's why they come to my house when I don't come to school for a week to see what's up. It's why they apply at and get jobs at the same place I work, so we can all hang out and share something. It's just a hard thing for me to get past. I guess I'm just extremely paranoid. The psychiatrist I visited for the first time in my life recently kind of implied that.

meh/10

>> No.8264199

>>8249966
I'll be your waifu

>> No.8264203

>>8264152
ya sleeping through events really helps with my social anxiety :^)

>> No.8264211

>>8260230
Top kek troll.

Benadryl is for sleeping, everyone knows that. If you're super desperate to get high you can take it and experience the worst sleep deprivation you can imagine.

I use Tramadol for this purpose though. It depends on the person, and can give some of you fucks seizures. But for me it literally kills all of my social worries and I make a new 'friend' like every single time I take it. It's almost like being drunk, but without the shitty effects. You're more or less normal.

Until the nausea hits. Then you go home and are tired but can't sleep. You might throw up. Later you try to jack off and find that no matter how hard you try, it's not happening. I managed it once. My dick felt broken after. Like acid from those old Mortal Kombat levels just came spewing out of it.

Would recommend.

>> No.8265107

>>8264199
a-are you a grill?

>> No.8265114

OP here, feel free to feel the feel of my other quality feels threads:

>>>/int/24815641

>>>/ck/5460003