How can I help my gf's terrible fashion sense?

[Anonymous No.14206875]

I've been going out with her since last year and honestly her awful taste in clothing and unwillingness to revamp her wardrobe is starting to get on my nerves.

She's rather socially awkward to begin with. Despite being naturally pretty, she really doesn't do herself any favors aesthetically insofar as she gets the majority of her clothes from fucking charity stores and with few exceptions, most of her wardrobe veers between what one might expect to see on a frumpy mom and a twelve year old girl with no semblance of a coherent style.

The problems also go beyond fashion sense to a general apathy regarding personal grooming and hygiene, which is arguably a much more serious issue, but I do think getting a new wardrobe which actually looks good or at least just passable would be a positive step, as I do think her fashion sense (or lack of) is a symptom of poor self esteem and other unhealthy thought patterns.

I have a hard time approaching these topics head on because I don't want to seem mean or superficial, but when we do talk about it, she normally dismisses fashion as mindlessly conformist, and insists that she wears what she actually likes. Problem is it isn't so much an issue of just wearing what other people wear for the sake of fitting in, but rather just having a sense of taste and aesthetics. What she wears mostly isn't just not the norm (like say, adopting a particular subculture's style) it just shows an ignorance of what looks good and what suits her.

Am I being selfish and superficial? Perhaps. I'm a self conscious person by nature, and sometimes her lack of self-awareness gets on my nerves, but frankly if I were a superficial person, I wouldn't be going out with her. I do that because I like being with her generally, and whilst this isn't a deal breaker, it does annoy me.

Anyway, sorry for all the agony aunt bullshit, basically how do I nudge her in the right direction fashion wise without coming across badly?

[Anonymous No.14206892]

>>14206875
Try buying her clothes

[Anonymous No.14206896]

>>14206892
I should have added we're both poor as shit college students.

[Anonymous No.14206902]

>>14206892
For the time being, she has more disposable income than I do, seeing as she gets grants and shit whilst I get nothing I don't earn and most my money goes into rent and shit.

[Anonymous No.14206922]

I am going to have to be blunt here, would you say this is a dealbreaker long-term? And does she have depression or something that you know of? If this is in her persona then this won't change in a month.

[Anonymous No.14206931]

>>14206896
>>14206902
Vote for Andrew Yang

[Anonymous No.14206938]

>>14206922
> I am going to have to be blunt here, would you say this is a dealbreaker long-term?

I'd say not, but it would certainly help to resolve it. I feel as though it would be incredibly mean of me to consider break up over something like this, since she herself is an incredibly kind and gentle person.

> And does she have depression or something that you know of?

Unfortunately yes, I'd have to say. She used to be worse off before we started dating, since I did know her since the start of college, but its still there.

[Anonymous No.14206943]

Tldr

[Anonymous No.14206996]

I have the same "problem". My gf buys fast fashion and we had arguments about this because i hate that industry. Im feeling shes getting more interested in it and i have a small glimmer of hope that shes gonna revamp her wardrobe.
I still don't know how to tell her directly though, even though im a very direct and honest person.

[Anonymous No.14207012]

>>14206875
>not knowing her fashion sense before going out with her
Your fucken fault desu

[Anonymous No.14207013]

>>14206875
most girls who claim to like fashion still have a really generic fashion sense. You'd see them on the street and you wouldn't see their outfit and think fashion.
> she normally dismisses fashion as mindlessly conformist, and insists that she wears what she actually likes.

It is in a lot of ways for most people . And wearing what she likes isn't bad. I'd say expose her to high fashion through fashion photography or something but if she'd probably see what you're trying to do. Best bet is to just to have a discussion on fashion with her but a lot of that depends on your own knowledge. And since you felt like making this post, I'm going to assume you know jack shit.

[Anonymous No.14207049]

I cant see the entire picture but your gf sounds based.

Are there other indicators that she has shit taste? She could just be apathetic yet can still see or feel good aesthetics.

[Anonymous No.14207104]

>>14207049
I think its a mix of apathy and general ignorance which comes from it. I don't think she inherently has shit taste or something, just that she doesn't care to give it any thought.

I don't know, maybe I'm being too hard on her?

[Anonymous No.14207114]

>>14206875
My girl and I are gonna go do a dress up day where I pick out her clothes and she picks out mine and we try them on in a bunch of different stores. Seems like a good starting point.

[Anonymous No.14207251]

>>14206938
Maybe you can suggest her trying certain things when you are at a thrift shop, they have quality clothing from time to time but at a way lower price. If she really doesn't give a damn about clothing and stuff though I wouldn't expect much. I would focus on making it fun so it doesn't come across as pushy.

[Anonymous No.14207290]

>>14206875
Dude ur kinda being a dick

[Anonymous No.14207470]

>>14207290
fuck off faggot

[Anonymous No.14207504]

I mean she likes what she likes, I'd say go shopping with her and try to encourage her to try stuff she wouldn't normally try and just say it's for fun

This is how I got my friend who didn't wear ANYTHING remotely fashionable to actually start wearing tighter fitting stuff, and now she's a complete street style lover

[Anonymous No.14207587]

>>14206875
Have GF with hot sexy body but only wears loose clothes despite being very slim and attractive.

Going with her to stores “for fun” and asking her to try clothes has made her realize she is actually a size 0 (not a 4) and has a nice figure to show off.

This can do wonders in boosting her self esteem while having a fun time. When she starts buyint clothes, she will gravitate to clothes that do indeed look good.

[Anonymous No.14207601]

>>14207104
Yeah, I think you are. If she likes what she is currently wearing then you should leave her be. Trying to manipulate your girlfriend into adopting the particular fashion ideals that _you_ find to be nice is a dick thing to do.

[Synthetic Aesthetic No.14207791]

>>14206875
Go to a mall and show her cute clothes, fashion isn't a niche thing you just have to awaken her desire to want to look good. If she has some cute fits and likes em she'll be more apt to organize her wardrobe.

[Anonymous No.14208061]

>>14206902
Lol do you pay to poop?

[Anonymous No.14208112]

Take a trip outside of your college town to some rich burbs, and hit up the thrift stores there. They'll be better quality than the other stores, while still in a cheap price range.

Have you tried dressing her up yourself at a thrift store? Can't imagine the nicer ones being completely devoid of something that both she and you would like and I'm sure she would love the attention and flattery when you get her nice fits.

[How can I help my bf's low sel(...) No.14208145]

I've been going out with him since last year and honestly his constant preening and willingness to climb inside his wardrobe and masturbate is starting to get on my nerves.

He's rather uncharismatic to begin with. Despite being well dressed, he really doesn't do himself any favors financially insofar as he spends all his money on fucking designer clothing and with few exceptions, most of his wardrobe veers between what one might expect to see on a dadbod and a mentally ill homeless man that was given the odds and ends thrift stores couldn't sell.

The problems also go beyond fashion sense to a general apathy regarding masculinity, which is arguably a much more serious issue, but I do think getting some self-esteem which actually makes him feel like a man or at least passing would be a positive step, as I do think his fashion sense is a symptom of poor self-esteem and other unhealthy thought patterns.

I have a hard time approaching these topics head on because I don't want to seem domineering or sexist, but when we do talkk about it, he normally dismisses masculinity as mindlessly conformist, and insists that he wears what he actually likes. Problem is it isn't so much of an issue of just wearing what other people don't wear for the sake of not fitting in, but rather just having a sense of self-worth and individuality outside of clothing. What he wears mostly isn't just not the norm (like say, adopting a particular subculture's style) it just shows an ignorance of what behavior looks good and suits a man.

Am I being self-effacing and subficial? Perhaps. I'm a feminine person by nature, and sometimes his lack of self-awareness gets on my nerves, but frankly if I were a subficial person, I wouldn't be going out with him. I do that because I like how he looks generally, and whilst this isn't a deal breaker, it does annoy me.

Anyway, sorry for all the agony aunt bulshit, basically how do I nudge him in the right direction masculinity wise without coming across badly?

[Anonymous No.14208540]

>>14208145

Video games and masturbation kills the man. Let him lift weights and take him out to a man's clothier. You seem like a nice girl who tries her best to invest in her current bf. Mine has done the same for me. Frankly, our society and economy does not want men to be manly and masculine.

[Anonymous No.14208555]

>>14208145
Well done

[Anonymous No.14208599]

>>14206875
Your gf sounds fun and cool as hell. What music do you both like? What do you guys do for fun?

[Anonymous No.14208603]

fuck off with these reddit spaces

[Anonymous No.14208652]

She obviously doesn't understand fashion, art, or society. I think you hit the nail on the head by saying it's a self confidence problem. She doesn't thinks she's attractive, so she becomes defensive about anything to do with looks. She doesn't value herself, she needs to build confidence. That's something positive that you can help her with.

Give her compliments, ask her opinions on clothes, go shopping with her and try steer her choices in the right direction. You absolutely can buy cute clothes at a second hand store.

Unless you are going to straight up tell her that looks/hygiene is important to you and for her to do this stuff at least for you, then it's going to be a slow process.

[Anonymous No.14208655]

>>14208145
funny how op sounds like a bitch but when you flip the sexes this anons bf seems like he’s the bitch

[Anonymous No.14208657]

it kind of sounds like she already has a refined and unique taste and style, maybe youre just not seeing it. someone who's a normie with no style wouldn't shop at charity shops.

[Anonymous No.14208674]

>>14206875
post one of her fits. also go thrift shopping (maybe without her) and pick up a couple things u think she would look good in. a simple pair of jeans that look like would fit her and a couple cute tops can make all the difference

[Anonymous No.14208790]

>>14208145