/fa/ - Fashion

[Anonymous No.11993705]

This is probably one of the worst places to ask, but I feel that effay is the least r9k out of all the boards so I'll give it a shot.

While dressing nice and looking good is all Gucci, what I really need to work on is social skills. I'm not an r9k neck beard yet, but I'm not as popular as I'd like to be. It doesn't matter how well I dress if I don't have any social skills.

1. I dress well enough that I don't look like a freak
2. I shower everyday
3. I am fairly athletic. I play football and track

However, people don't really invite me to parties and shit like that. How do I become more likable? How do I flirt with girls better? Is there a book I could read or like some wiki article on the sticky?

Pic unrelated, but goddamn I wish that were me

[Anonymous No.11993724]

>>11993705
r/socialskills

[Anonymous No.11993725]

>>11993705
practice makes perfect

you literally have to just start talking to random people as awkward as it makes you feel.

[Anonymous No.11993731]

>>11993705
>effay is the least r9k
kek. this board is where /r9k/ goes shopping

[Anonymous No.11993740]

Focus on yourself rather than focusing on appealing to other people. What do you like to do? What are your hobbies? Do those and become an interesting person through these things. You'll never be comfortable if you try to adhere to a set of rules based on other peoples preferences or ones from a book.

People will see you as passionate and interesting if you pursue things you like and you will be more comfortable and more likely to be social with the people that you surround yourself with by being in these niches.

Otherwise you will come across and insincere and desperate - like a large number of people on this board.

[Anonymous No.11993771]

speak your mind and don't be afraid to disagree with people. tease them and occasionally be rude. be emotive and don't be afraid to express your emotions. pretend to like people more than you do. be generous with compliments

i can tell from your post that you're boring and extremely status conscious. loosen up.

[Anonymous No.11993912]

Regarding parties: You literally only need to know ONE person who parties a lot. 90% of the parties I've been to have been because of my own friend who's a DJ. He invites me all the time to house parties and shit.

Other than that, you really just got to put yourself out there and go for it. I have faith in you, since you're trying to make the conscious choice to change without self pity. Like, if you're in university, go to pub nights, at least FAKE acting sociable (my friend does this, I see right through him but girls suck it up) and people will like you. Don't be an emotionally apathetic fuck like me, actually make an effort and you'll get there.

Lastly, focus on yourself bro. Just keep trying to better yourself and people will notice. And if they don't, so be it. Fuck them, happiness comes from within. Don't make your source of happiness from other people's approval, try your best to make it intrinsic.

You are trying to make the conscious choice to change and not just basking in self-pity, which is good, so I have faith that you will change. Good luck man

[Anonymous No.11993917]

>>11993705

Same poster from above. Regarding flirting with girls, it's easy to flirt with people you're comfortable with. If you see a girl and shit doesn't click, then you can try faking it, but other than that I find it easy to flirt with girls that I'm comfortable with. Just joke around, tease them etc. It's hard to gauge because you don't know how most girls will respond, so if they're easy going, test out your skills on them and most of all, try to make them laugh. It will give that emotional connection but also give you some confidence to say other shit.

I don't really know how to become likable. I guess if you aren't a douchebag who people don't like to be around, you instantly make yourself more likeable than most people, but honestly I don't really know.

[Anonymous No.11993936]

>>11993705
>How do I become more likable?
steer away from this goal if you havent taken the time to search yourself and decide that you are likeable even if you're the only person around that likes you

[Anonymous No.11994098]

>>11993705
>I feel that effay is the least r9k out of all the boards

[Anonymous No.11994101]

About flirting and shit, just read Book of Pook. Once you read it you will realize women are a meme.

[Anonymous No.11994107]

/fa/ is the most normie board. This place is filled with people who browse reddit, twitter, facebook, etc. who indulge in everyday interests and hold non-controversial outlooks on life. Most people on here refuse to browse the rest of 4chan believing in the /pol/ boogeyman.

Not to mention this board probably has the highest population of minors in regards to the blue-boards.

You're asking the wrong place. Go somewhere else.

[Anonymous No.11994116]

You need to learn to love yourself first, and this is a priority. Once you learn to be happy with just yourself everything will be easy as fuck. Before I started this self improvement meme I used to hang out with my ex-girlfriend and her friends (protip: NEVER hang out with your ex or women in general unless you're fucking them afterwards) and she was always making fun of me and putting me down, it wasn't even really banter it was passive-aggressive bullshit that I put up with because I was a beta cuck and cared too much about what people thought of me. Eventually I worked enough on myself that I didn't give a fuck anymore and told her to fuck off, best thing I ever did senpai. Also eventually I started to get laid more (I guess it came from lifting too) but basically it's very important to have friends that you actually like, and like that anon said above, if you want to get invited to parties make friends with someone that goes to parties alot. Also on picking up girls, try to do it along with your friends, its easier and more comfortable than going out alone picking up girls in a club (it's a PUA trash meme, you're just gonna look very creepy) Basically if you look like you're having fun girls are easily going to be more attracted to you.

[Anonymous No.11994208]

>>11994107
>op is asking how to be socially adjusted and normal
>"/fa/ is the most normie board"

Are you retarded anon? This is the perfect place to ask

[Anonymous No.11994560]

>>11993705
>How do I become more likable?
1: Be approachable, do not try to build up mask behind which you can hide. Being dressed super fancy or unusual can be such a barrier. If likeability is your goal dress well-fitting but normie and incorporate slight mismatches in color, fabric or cut.
2: Behave in a way that allows other people to relax. Don't take yourself too seriously, if you are nervous or if you mess up then admit that you are ashamed but don't make a big deal out of it. Have one or two things you can talk about without being autistic about it.
3: Practice makes perfect. Go out, experience stuff and chat with people for the cause of chatting.

Good luck!

[Anonymous No.11994608]

>I feel that effay is the least r9k out of all the boards

Should we tell him?

[Anonymous No.11994630]

>>11993725
>>11993740
>>11993771
>>11993912
>>11993917
>>11993936
>>11994116
>>11994560

Thanks for the help guys.

The thing is, I'm not socially awkward. I have friends, but they just don't invite me to whatever they do. I'm not entirely sure why, but idk I guess.

I do have one guy that I know from football thats fairly popular, and hes pretty good friends with me.

My passions are playing piano and coding (and fashion/cosmetics I guess), but those usually dont bring the best people.

Either way, thank you all for posting

[Anonymous No.11994657]

>>11994208
you really need to see the others boards.../b/ and /a/ for example

[Anonymous No.11994869]

>>11993724
fuck off nigger, i want to learn all my social skills from 4chan!!

[Anonymous No.11994895]

>>11994208
oh yeah youre right anon. good eye.

still might be the wrong place due to all the underaged kids.

[Anonymous No.11994900]

>>11994630
>The thing is, I'm not socially awkward. I have friends, but they just don't invite me to whatever they do. I'm not entirely sure why, but idk I guess.

Uh...

[Anonymous No.11994905]

>>11993705
Get drunk at parties, and do random fun shit. Be a part of the party. Without looking try hard. Talk to people about "normie" hobbies (like football. Piano and coding not so much) When people starts saying shit like "you know how to party" you have made it. People will invite you.
The key is not to seem too desperate for aknowledgment.
Fake it until you start to become a "muh bat shit wasted at parties normie.
I went from no parties, to drinking thursday, friday and saturday every week by this method

[Anonymous No.11994914]

>>11993771
>be generous with compliments

Wrong. The more compliments you throw around the less weight they carry. I almost never compliment people but when I do, they can see that I truly mean it and I go out of my way to express it. The effect muliplies tenfold. It's kind of like reversing the roles around in that matter - you're not the one trying to win their affection, but them trying to win yours instead.

[Anonymous No.11994980]

>>11993705
Work as a cashier or a server for a little while. It'll teach you small talk

[Anonymous No.11995682]

>>11993705
Being likeable isn't as important as being respectable.

Just fuck around, you can get in the good graces of the lowest tier people in a group in terms of their ability to judge and measure people and then from there get an invite and find and hang with the cooler people.


Anyway I repeat, being likeable isn't as important as being respectable so just be feeling yourself, be critical in your opinion of others, and have a good time and other people will start being intimidated about how cool you are.

One good thing is to say what you think is funny without giving a shit whether other people think it's funny or not, and I mean not even looking at their faces to tell if they thought it was funny.

[Anonymous No.11995700]

>>11993771
this is actually really good advice

being generous with compliments takes skill, don't seem like you're desperate for validation - pretend that you like people more than you actually do


i do this and it makes people love me

[Anonymous No.11996002]

>21
>go to university in another city
>no friends
>engineering student
>no girls
>the whole university filled up with neckbeards
>everybody have social anxiety
>im so lonely in this atmosphere
>nobody going out with me to bars, clubs etc.

im afraid that i will be neckbeard too.

pls help me /fa/

[Anonymous No.11996053]

>>11994630
> I have friends, but they just don't invite me to whatever they do. I'm not entirely sure why, but idk I guess.

Some possible reasons why:

1) Your friends don't really like you.

2) Your friends think you won't enjoy what they enjoy.

3) Your friends are just as socially (in)active as you.

[Anonymous No.11996083]

>>11993705
This fool said is all Gucci

[Anonymous No.11996160]

>>11994914
>wrong

yr kinda right, but only if in a position of power when constantly microscoped (management, i guess in this case team captain or equivalent)

don't publicly/loudly give compliments to everybody, give the same compliments, or kiss ass on social media in a way peers would observe as fluff (also going out to receive compliments will guarantee woke folks' shade). compliments unable to carry their own water are just shitty compliments, has nothing to do with frequency, though relationships and conversations shouldn't revolve around compliments - they are chiefly rewards/icebreakers

advising to share compliments once a receiver has well crossed the "worthiness" threshold can make you seem gruff/arrogant, maybe more awkward than normal at the least. it may garner respect in a "i'm yr hardass dad" kinda way, but respected =/= well liked

frankness with compliments, when you feel it in your bellyguts, that is the best time to let them know. otherwise live in the passive aggressive cuck zone. off the cuff is sincere and moving, especially when it takes them off guard. avoid physicality or things people can't control, unless you're flirting. i would even tread carefully there because people are sensitive about crooked smiles and freckles, so save that for intimacy - those types of compliments will be very well received when spaced appropriately, as per >>11994914 's advice

examples: years ago some guy complimented my boots at the DMV and i was like wowee thank so mut never forget. were it a more sociable situation, i'd have liked that guy off the bat because he had the spine to engage with someone

also some time ago i ended up dating someone just because i approached her and verbatim: "i'm going to be candid here, ____. i heard you broke up with ____, and i've always wanted a moment with you. we should go out." and we did

also here u go have a flower bud, i like yr gumption

[Anonymous No.11996165]

>>11996160
cont

real talk re: teen popularity - none of this shit is going to matter when you hit 18/19, not even playing, so just see what types of people you have fun with, which will be more fulfilling and rewarding socially. if u focus entirely on what makes you popular or well liked you'll end up a progenitor of the next breed of narcissistic yohji owen jerkoffs in your coming years, should you be successful at becoming trendy and well-liked). being around people like you will help you be more comfortable giving compliments because you will know what you like about yourself and people. ultimately it will help you bring people that are good for you into yr life and you'll be a veritable cornucopia of positive ~vibes~ or whatever the fuck you kids say these days (also don't say gucci unless talking about gucci mane or gucci and gucci mane is like so out omg)

if you were the projock mr. popular type, you'd be him already, so focus on you.

[Anonymous No.11996242]

>>11996002
>tfw engineering student too
>except my uni is filled with Chads and 8+/10 girls
tough luck anon
if you really want to be an engineer push through it
I'm sure you can make friends somewhere else than your university

[Anonymous No.11996721]

>>11996165
not op but thanks for this anon.

the last sentence especially is very concise and well put.

[Anonymous No.11996736]

>>11994630
maybe you're a cunt to be around and the don't want you ruining the mood of the party

[Anonymous No.11996753]

>>11994869
>4chan
>social skills
wut?

[Anonymous No.11996756]

>>11995682
likable and respectable aren't mutually exclusive. if someone genuinely enjoys your presence, and that person doesn't have interpersonal skill issues (which 80% of people don't) they will value and respect you. if people don't respect you, but they like you anyway, you shouldn't be associating with those people.

add. that doesn't mean you shouldn't try to be someone who is respected

[Anonymous No.11996765]

>>11996002
try to befriend those people with similar interests, then take them with you and break them out of their shell.

[Anonymous No.11996774]

>>11993705
Dumb frogposter