/fa/ - Fashion

This ain't /fit/, in case you accidentally clicked to the left

>>6024284
>prick them with my dick as i try to pass by
I lost it

gb2/fit/

This is what happens when you dont masturbate before leaving home.

Did the girl u rape the same as the one sitting down next to you?

>>6024310
i masturbate on a daily base but i can feel with op having random boners

>being ashamed of your boner

>>6024368
i am not but i am ashamed of poking people with it

>OP made an entire greentext story b/c some bitch sat next to him on a bus
>>>/fit/

This just can't be true.

>>6024310
>>6024324
how do you even get boners in public

are you 12

just slow that shit down

>go on first date since heart stabbing breakup
>hand hold
>holy fuck
>another human touched me
>awkward boner in public
>oh anonette it's cold
>do up my parka to block bulge
>really anon? first warm day in weeks
welp

>>6024438
im 22 and it's pretty normal
i wish i could control it
btw i haven't ahd sex in 1+ year does thismatter?

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>/7chan/

>>6024428
You're underestimating the power of anon.

>>6024491
u cant say that here enjoy ur ban

sage for funny epic greentext meme story

>>6024506
more like underestimating how lame /fit/ is

>Be drunk clubbing
>Drunkenly make-out with chick and laugh with mates afterwards
>Think nothing of it next day as I nurse hangover
>Go to college on the Monday
>See friends, they all make jokes about me as soon as I arrive
>Guy I don't really know but is close mates with a few of my mates had taken pictures of me kissing this girl
>This girl is actually a 40/50 overweight women with crooked teeth
>Pictures of her with tounge in my mouth
>so many picture... so many
>Ask this guy to delete he lols and says no
>Go home, don't even bother with class
>Check fb, all these girls loling at me while I cry under my blanket at home reading their comments
>One pic has 60 likes, 200 comments
>I haven't left the flat in 4 weeks
>Haven't spoken to friends in 4 weeks
>Been sleeping all day and eating flatmates food at night
>I no longer see my flatmate since this routine
I just want to die, idek why I'm on /fa/

>>6024527
That image is from /r9k/.

>>6024543
>"you want a beta story, /fit/"
>/fit/
>/fit/
>>>/fit/

literally the first sentence

>>6024529
i once mad out with a transvestite, just wait till peopel forget

>>6024549
It's a trickery, it actually is from /r9k/.

>>6024529
hahah thats funny, you need to stop taking it so fucking seriously. It is embarrassing but you need to fucking get over it. Sounds like you have friends n stuff

>>6024529
I don't see how you can pick yourself up from 4 weeks of hiding in a cupboard. Unlucky buddy, feel for you.

>>6024529
Become an hero

>>6024324
Masturbating so much is bad

>>6024438
>implying I get boners at all

op is a disgusting subhuman with no self control who will never be anything BUT disgusting subhuman because he can't see it's all his own fault

same with the rest of you sympathizing, it's called self control you nasty little boys

>>6024506

>you've lost god out of your life
>i go to my elder

lost it hard

>>6024506
Oh wow.

Everybody dislikes Jehova's Witnesses for a reason. Even other christians.

>>6024295
not OP, but i really thought i was on /fit/ when reading this

>>6025020
>Masturbating so much is bad

[citation needed]

>>6024529
you were drunk, it happens. idk why you made such a big deal of it

>>6025143
You get dehydrated, and you dont get aroused as easily.

Not Masturbating is also not recommended.

There should be a balance.

>>6024529
Sorry bro, but you were drunk, it could have happened to anyone.

Get over it.
DOnt think about it and dont talk about it, people will eventualy forget it.

The worst thing you can do is making a big deal out of it, it will only make others remember it more easily.

>>6024506
That's the greatest thing I've ever read

>>6024529
I know it's ALMOST impossible: but if you just act like you don't give a shit about it, then no one will care.

>>6024506
Oh fuck, Jehovah's witnesses, Those pricks.
My childhood crush, a massive qtp2t3.14 was in a family of them.
She was cute as fuck as a child, grown to be a gorgeous girl.
Never went to any birthday party beacuse of the religion, not even to some of the school parties.
Saw her the other day, covered in some horrible old lady clothes (because it's the only kind the religion permits).
I honestly cried a bit on the inside, as I was looking at her from a distance. Such a wasted potential.

Also, a friend I had was gay, and his family were Jehovah's witnesses too. I cringe as I think what they said or done to him when they found out.
He tried to kill himself because of it, and died a week later in the hospital with some infection.
God-tier m8. Everyone loved the shit out of him.

Fuck you, Jeovah's witnesses. Goddamn it.

>>6025332
Jehovah's Witnesses, Mormons, Amishes and Baptists are the worst of the Chrisitan groups.
Such radical ways of thinking, I would gladly join a holy Catholic crusade to erradicate them.

>>6024368
for some reason this pic of David made me laugh

>>6025332

>>6024529
Delete your facebook, go Dadcore, its the only way

>>6024295
the fuck, I thought I was on /fit/ as well.

>>6024506
holy fucking shit no way thats real

>senior year
>im a massive doucheba who thinks hes never wrong about anything
>start talking to this qt3.14 1/2 azn w/ gr9 booty
>we hang out and completely click
>like, she even listened to lil b
>got along great for a week until this other girl decided to show her interest in me
>"heh, im gonna play the fuck out of these girls."
>start talking and hanging out with grill 2
>8/10 w/ massive titties
>keep talking to both grills
>grill 1 finds out thru her friend, confronts me on it
>"lol idk what ur talmbout hoe"
>shes pretty much like "fuck you"
>i shrug it off because i still have grill 2
>start getting more serious with grill 2
>"anon i have to tell you something"
>"im pregnant with my ex's twins"
>wat.jpg
>tell her "we'll get thru this together" and that whole spiel
>i had no clue but she was still fucking her ex behind my back
>wasnt pregnant either
>was also a freshman who told me she was a junior
>im living in complete denial of this whole situation
>eventually realize i fucked up bad
>crawl back to grill 1
>"please take me back, i know i fucked up, etc etc"
>responds with "nah fuck you."
>completly lose my shit
>started railing 750mg vics and xanny bars before school
>a general drugged up mess
>eventually pull myself back together

i didnt move on from grill 1 for like 6 months and i lowkey wish i could get her back

shit sux man

>>6025603
I guess you learned a lesson.

But:
> >"im pregnant with my ex's twins"

Why didnt you abandon ship right away?

>>6024529
sounds like some pretty shitty friends

>>6025630
i dunno. she said she was gonna get an abortion and all that shit and she was a wreck so i was just trying to be nice

>tfw "nice guy"

>>6025603
you are a disgusting creature

>>6025642
this is 4chan, we're all fucking awful

>>6025510
Count me in, bro.

>>6025543
Damn man, really? The chick or the m8?
The girl situation is forgettable and overall unimportant, but the m8 one is hard stuff.
It's been a year that he passed away and I get feels almost on a daily basis. Never had lost someone really important to me, and also the first wake (and also dead person) I've ever saw.
Cried like a baby, until I was actually shaking.

>mfw when his family walked straight to his grave, 0 effort
>mfw all his friends walked after the hearse as it went to the grave

Oh, the pain and rage. Those cunts.

>>6024284
can someone post the original zyzz comic this comes from

>>6024324
>not having already attained precise dick control at age 15

>>6024459
>hug butterface girl
>why boner, she isn't hot

That's when I found out 5/10s can still be sexed and nothing bad happens.

>>6025689
yah, 5/10 are just not ugly but not pretty.
I have a couple femfriends like that, I wouldnt mind banging.

>>6024549
There are crazy amounts of /r9k/ spam there because they are embarrassed of their actual board. There is a trip called "feelbrah" that spams about wanting a korean gf on a daily basis.

>>6025701
I bet its Dan

>>6025603
>massive douche who is never wrong about anything
>gets attached to a hoe

>>6025603
I am never enrolling my child into an american high school

>>6024551
me too bro, that was a /fa/ looking transvestite

>>6024529
>go back to school with your friends
>pretend you were sick to your teachers
>if someone speaks to you about what happened, laugh about it "Haha, souds like you're jealous, right ? I can pick up any girl I want"
>go clubbing again with your friends, but with less alcohol
>dress well
>find a cute girl this time
>save your reputation
>be happy again

>>6025603

you're a fucking faggot.

>>6025137
Might help if the sticky at the top of /fa/ didn't look identical to /fit/'s.

Reminds me of the time I clicked on /lit/ by mistake and briefly thought I'd entered opposite universe.

This was very funny to read in an otherwise boring lecture

Nice fake OP nobody can't be that shitty

sage

>be in bus
>see nice girl looking at me
>since i'm not a BETA faggot, i look at her too
>she immediately look away
>repeat

Every single fucking time. What am i supposed to understand here ? I have the emotional capacity of a 10 years old african child soldier.

>>6024506

Damn

>>6026239
next time smile like you know shes looking, then glance over.

>>6026239
understand ur emotions

>>6026239

>>6026239
dont look at her with your rapeface engaged

>>6026242
>>6026243
>>6026245
>>6026250

thanks u guys i love you fuccbois

>>6026239
Just fucking ignore her.
If she's too beta to make a move then her loss.

>>6024284

do you know why these stories are not funny

because they didn't fucking happen

what the fuck, this is some stupid ass fucking shit man it's like im on /b/ 2.0

>in the busstop
>see nice girl
>hi
>talk to her like you'd normally would to anyone, but compliment her
>ask for number
>go with a different bus than she does

Not that hard

>>6026292
>talk to her like i'd normally talk to anyone

whip out a keyboard and start typing, then?

>>6026306

>projecting

>>6026292
Hello, non-autist, what sort of stuff do you say to a girl you just met? I especially struggle with this in bars etc...

Also how do you flirt? Whenever I make flirtatious remarks or try to make moves it's always autistcore.

>>6026356

not him but also a non-autist

>what are you into?(boring check)
>read any good books lately?(idiot check)
>are you here with anyone? hello friends im anon *smile*(single check, this also shows you're a real person and not just a poon hound and you can introduce your friends at this point as well)

if she likes you she'll laugh at jokes you make even if they're not funny, let you light her smokes and maybe touch your arm or push you around lightly.

in all it's pretty simple. to me at least.

>>6026380
>asking a random girl on the street or at a pub that what she's been reading lately

What kind of places do you go to where this isn't an instant failure?

>>6026388
A library.

>>6026389
Even then there are just mostly college students who only go there as a must and a necessity, and still act like 13 year olds. I'm kinda jealous of you actually

>>6024295
Thought I was in /fit/ too

>buying textbook from library
>waiting in line
>qt latina with gr7 bod gets in line behind me
>i go to grab wallet from backpack and conviniently turn around to get a glimpse at face and make initial eye contact
>give her a cheeky smirk, turn back around
>she goes: Excuse me? I really like your backpack, where did you get it?
>me: Oh, this is from Saks fifth avenue but they're hard to come by, they only get a limited amount of these (MCM backpack inb4 absolute shitstorm idgaf yolo)
>her: Oh I've heard about that store, it's really expensive!
>me: Yeah it's alright, they've got some cool stuff (in my mind I;m already telling myself to drop this shit, obviously this poor beaner will not live up to my expectations)
>next in line to go to cashier
>leave it at that
Phew, avoided that one huh /fa/..

>>6026392

Iktf
Every university library near me is just people looking for textbooks or using the computers, every public library is old people

>>6026401

Classic. At least there was no spaghetti.

>>6025169
>dehydrated
What, because of the litres and litres of semen that he ejaculates every time he masturbates?

>>6026353
>buzzwords
go to dictionary.com and think about what you've done today.

>>6026401
>(in my mind I;m already telling myself to drop this shit, obviously this poor beaner will not live up to my expectations)
Why not just one night stand her you faggot? Latinas with gr7 bods are hot as fuck.

>>6026388

are you fucking kidding? do you REALLY not know how to start a conversation with someone, or make small talk?

>>6024295
>>6025137
>>6025574
>>6026399
Yay, i have twinzzz
>>6026225
That's nothing, imagine having the pc in the living room and accidently clicking /hc/ instead of fit.. Bricks were shat

>>6026612
>lurking 4chan at all where people might see you

That's not "LOL SECRET CLUB" bullshit, but even the SFW boards are rarely fully SFW.

>>6026594

>>6024529
i know dat feel. I always get too drunk.

>>6024529
Thank god I'll never know that feel. When I'm drunk I'm too depressed to hit on anyone

>in lecture hall eating a banana
>2 grils come into the hall, showing legs and arms
>sit next to me
>one has an ice lolly
>making slurping sounds
>haven't fapped in 2 days

>cycling in spandex
>reach my destination and take a rest for couple minutes
>check my phone
>female in her early 30s rolls along with a tight body
>glance at her, wonder if I should start small talk
>she looks at me and after couple seconds approaches and asks me what's the time
>I tell her the time
>She looks at me for couple more seconds, says thanks... and leaves

>>6026856
>ice lolly

It that Britspeak for Popsicle?

>>6026612
>>6026620
yeah especially /fit/
looks at all these half-naked men in public? really?

>>6026874
popsa-what? speak English

>>6026874

>popsicle

>>6024284
this is why you don't wear tracksuits outside of home. had a boner in the most inappropriate places but it never made a difference. how you managed to fuck it up is beyond me

still, my sympathies

>>6026873
Ah spandex, the ultimate womanizer fabric.

>>6026880
Pardon me.

OI, GUV! CAN YOU PHONE ME UP A JOE BAXI SO'S I CAN NICK ONE O' DEM ICE LOLLIES OFF ONE O' DOSE CHAVETTES DOWN IN KNICKERBOXER-ON-SOUTHFORD? IT'S RIGHT EASY, INNIT?

>>6026887
I'm sorry. Let me buy you a "sweet treat that's cold to eat" to make up for it.

>>6026918

Americans are autistic as fuck, what the hell is wrong with you?

Go munch on your potato chips you retard.

>>6024529
that's good banter? you fucking melt get the fuck out of the house it's a laugh that will last 2 days- go out and get with more munters for lols.

>>6026918

Take your autism somewhere else, sperglord

>>6025761
lol

>>6026943
>௵
How do you search for this image?

>>6026918
my sides

>>6026943
For some reason, that image combined with that filename distresses me.

>>6026918
>its right easy innit
HAHAHA

>>6026910
Many close female friends say they're disguisted with me wearing spandex but when I go out it's a different story.

>>6026918
top lel

>>6026985
are you a girl or do you wear them under shorts?

>>6026999
I'm a cyclist man.
I only ride my bike in them.

>>6024527
Never been to r9k????

>>6026943
>filename

>>6026436
Believe it or not, many people dont drink enough water daily.
Adding ejaculation to it is not helping.

>>6026918
Oi m8 calm down. Go and eat a burger or practice with your rifle or something

>>6024529
ahahahaahahaahahahaha that is the funniest shit I've ever read. Mainly because the first bit happened to me, luckily the pictures didn't go on fb but only really pop up when I'm trying to pull and a mate spreads the banter.

Actually I get why you did this... Friends can be pricks.

>>6025510
what bad experiences have you had with baptists?

>>6025510
it would be really cool in like 2040 to have like a holy catholic neo crusade where we wear like warhammer 40k suits and kill muslims and shit. yes im a neckbeard

>>6024506
This is fucking hilarious

>>6025130
There was a Jehovas Witness kid at my school who died because his father refused to let him have a blood transfusion (saving dat eternal soul) and the kid was too brainwashed to demand it.

A few years afterward the father needed surgery which required a blood transfusion. The Motherfucker took it.

>>6029167
Its just their ways of thinking and their belief that other Cristhian groups are not "Real" Cristhians.
Its just hypocrital.
Also, I dislike most Protestant groups and how they interfere so deeply in many schools, and their dislike for Evolutionary theories.

>>6029190
Its ok Anon, we are all a little bit in the inside.

>>6029217
Jehova's Witnesses in action.