/fa/ - Fashion

to feel better about yourself?

to not feel as shitty and empty
temporarily

>>14770921
>temporarily
Exactly. What's the point of looking good from a distance if starting a conversation ruins everything.

>>14770912
complaining about that is equal parts endearing and nonsensical. Do you expect it to be some innate trait? An essence? Personality is cultivated and acted seamlessly, continuously. When you look at it like that there's no reason to think the actions you did in the past (what you think your personality manifests as) have to repeat in the future. What do you want to be, man? What interests you? What do you miss to see in the people around you?

>>14771150
>Personality is cultivated
What if you inherited shitty character traits and grew with shitty parenting nutrients?

>>14771150
>Do you expect it to be some innate trait? An essence?
Yes, we all have a deeply rooted set of personality traits; we may be narcissists or sadists and those traits would be stable over time. They would guide our urges, our actions, and we may despise those traits and yet remain powerless to change them because a system can't change itself.

>>14771183
as if you yourself even believe what youre saying. of course we cant escape narcissism or sadism if thats what we are but thats not what im fucking talking about. its not fucking psychiatric disorders. its interests and achievements and attitudes you adapt by getting into a habit of saying "oh really? man you gotta tell me more about that". fucking narcissism my ass. what an idiot to think of it like that.

tfw i cant hold a conversation so i don't talk to any of the cuties that check me out ):

>>14771296
I'm not complaining about what my interests are.
My problem is how I make people feel.

>>14771140
Simply don’t converse

>>14772720
I want a social life man.

>>14772731
Stop wanting a social life if it obviously makes you unhappy

>>14772539
What, do you make them feel like shit? Intentionally? Psycho/narcissist tendencies? Is that what youre trying to get at?

Dressing better makes you feel more confident, which will positively impact your social interactions and thus, your personality.
>>14771169
>What if you inherited shitty character traits and grew with shitty parenting nutrients?
Then you are damaged goods and should seek a good psychologist.

I always thought I was maladjusted in some way or form, either from my shitty parents or shitty upbringing. But some of my earliest memories are from kindergarten. I had no friends even then and mostly stuck to myself. What can a 5 year old do so wrong in order to not have friends at that age? Serious question guys, I've thought on it a lot but I'm stuck.

>>14772987
>either from my shitty parents or shitty upbringing
it's a redundant repetition

>>14772987
>I had no friends even then and mostly stuck to myself. What can a 5 year old do so wrong in order to not have friends at that age? Serious question guys, I've thought on it a lot but I'm stuck.

Are you me my brother?

>>14772987
>But some of my earliest memories are from kindergarten. I had no friends even then and mostly stuck to myself. What can a 5 year old do so wrong in order to not have friends at that age? Serious question guys, I've thought on it a lot but I'm stuck.
I was always avoidant and abrasive. But in the same time, I was a popular teenager and elected class president twice. Just thru the sheer will of mine. I was popular but hang out with dweebs.

>>14772995
At least I make up for my inability for human connection by being fit, dressing well and having good skin. Still an incel though and I truly feel sorry for people that are like me but fat and ugly.

>>14773000
Either way, it's the inherited character traits and a shit parenting - none of it is my fault. I was either born evil and or got bad parenting nutrients.

>>14773000
Why did you hang out with dweebs? I cant imagine a confident and popular person doing so.

>>14773006
It was an edgy thing to do.

also, I'm very jealous and competitive and popular kids pissed me off I suppose

It's like, I'm gonna be gay just to spite the whores

i fixed my shit personality by getting a job as a cashier that forced me to interact with ppl so i can keep getting hours/raise and by interacting with people who have common interest with you
unless you're oozing with charisma like the rock. not everybody is gonna like you
mind you i have a lisps and can be awkward sometimes especially if im nervous
but i Managed to have been in 4 serious relationships and currently been dating my gf for 2 years
I dress pretty decent and gotten some compliments on WAYWT but first you need to change your mindset and think positive of yourself

>>14770912

It's totally fine if you are rich.

>>14770912
I just dress for myself at this point.

>>14773239
So, sweatpants and hoodies ?

>>14773399
No, I like to dress well just because I want to be well dressed, not because I'm trying to woo anyone.

>>14773005
>born evil
Unless literally your a psychopathic criminal, no
>shit parenting
And? The fact that you had shitty parents isn't a valid excuse.
They may be the root of the problem, but the fault of not changing that lies within you - within you, like the capacity to change.
So stop wasting face being another child that blames all their issues to their upbringing to this world.

>>14773895
Imagine if you can that from your earliest age your schizoid father was always denigrating you, putting you down, beat your mom, never encouraged you and always mocked and criticized you. Imagine growing up like this.

How would you grow up if your immature father always mocked and criticized you and you were kinda afraid of him because he regularly beat your mom.

>>14773913
save money and move out
never talk to them again

>>14773913
call the police next time he's beating your mom and try to videotape it without him seeing you to use as further evidence.
get him locked up

>>14773908
I cant, but nobody else is going to fix your life. So it's entirely on you. Your reward will be that when your 60 you wont have lived a life of regret.

I hate myself

all day

>>14770912
I wouldn't need to dress well if I had a good personality

>>14770912
so you can gaslight women and abuse them.

>>14770912
personality doesn't matter tho

>>14774870
Actually, it's what matters the most

>>14774873
your looks are what matter most.

>>14774888
>your looks are what matter most
wrong
your inner universe and your attitude is what matters the most
looks are nothing but a book cover

>>14774895
the book cover is 97.3947% of the reason people buy the book

>>14770912
I call it "balancing the scale"

>>14774905
and what makes them read and talk about it instead of leaving it on the shelf

>>14774905
I won't buy what I know is a good book with shit cover but I may happen to buy what I don't know is a shit book with nice cover.

>>14775278
So if the book happens to be boring you keep reading it? It's still a boring book.

No one wants to ve boring.

To fake being fun and interesting.

>>14775278
>I won't buy what I know is a good book with shit cover
Do you honestly think like that, or are you lying for the sake of not losing an argument?

Just hang around people you admire and you'll become more like them, you are always a mixture of the five people you see most frequently

>>14773908
I can relate to that. I "fixed" myself through effort and a lot of mistakes, you can do it anon it's not impossible it's just really hard

>>14775149
big
fat
cock

In my experience being socially competent and having girlfriends doesn't always go hand in hand. I myself thought I was pretty social (had a crew of friends) back in my home country but since moving to another country (France) I've been racked with self doubt whether I'm at all likeable. Been here for four years and I've got like four friends.

good first impression

People need to be visually attracted to you before you can even use your personality

>>14775327

Wow it's magic

I can't believe there is a serious discussion here over if looks matter more than personality. If you are striving to live a life better lived, you would obviously want a better personality, and also if you want to look good, you'd dress good. But if you had to choose between dressing good and having a good personality, and you fucks think dressing good is better than having a better self sense of personality, then you guys are super wack.

People might look at you and think "wow he looks cool, I bet he gets alot of gash" insteaf of "ew, what a sad looking loser". Ofcourse you wouldn't know what people think of you but maybe your dreams get a little more realistic :)

>>14772987
>was pretty outgoing in kimdergarden
>still have no social-skills as an adult
I don't even know where it went wrong. Why am I not like everybody else? I think about this alot and I think alot of it has to do with being labeled as a "shy kid" at a pretty early age. Mostly by my parents. You get called shy enough and eventually you start acting more shy because you think that's just who you are. I wish my parents didn't just let it slide when I acted shy and encouraged me more to talk to people.

>>14773014
Damn real shit faggot

can psychaedelics cause a personality paradigm shift? just want to fucking stop feeling this shitty way