/fa/ - Fashion

>>14323296

both are too long
pic related is ideal

>>13662128

>>13589603
Yes.
>Ten years after my first fumbling experiences with Oliver, the once somewhat scared boy of seventeen would do nearly anything. For awhile, exhibitionism was a new all-encompassing diversion; I exposed myself during amateur night at a local gay strip club in Milan. In an ultimate fail, I slipped onstage after stepping into a puddle of semen and lube left behind by the previous performer. I started having sex in local parks, in parked cars, in portable toilets. On what was to become my final night as a gay man, I was willing to risk everything one last time. My quest for acceptance, love, and manhood remained entirely and hopelessly incomplete after Oliver. I ended almost exactly where I began; I stood at nearly the same point in space – ten years later. But I was still scared. As for the boy, he never left me. Being gay, and having sex with men, didn’t make him into a man. He was still searching and he took me along for the ride. Except my body was breaking down. Early that morning, I would stumble half-dazed from a gay sex-club. I collapsed into the gutter. I vomited blood and the violent stomach contractions caused my colon to completely empty its contents. I reached into my underwear – I was bleeding internally. My life was streaming out from both ends. Where I thought there existed a doorway into the sublime, I had kicked-open the gaping passageway to death. This was my final humiliation. If heaven meant some sort of afterlife and hell was an immediate and everlasting conclusion to this torture, I chose damnation.