/diy/ - Do It Yourself

>>2582995
>OP buys some tools from Princess Auto
>Performs an operation on himself
>Ends up on some retarded youtube channel on weird ways people died

>>2582995
god damn your dumb.

>>2582998
elaborate

>>2582999
there is no need to, it's obvious why.

>>2582995
>anon shoving stuff down his throat that he bought on Alibaba
>anon suddenly gags and struggles to breathe
>anon reflexively yanks tubes out of throat, tearing esophagus tissue
>vomit shoots up from anon's stomach and gets into the esophageal wounds
>anon still hasn't fixed the stricture and now he needs to go to the emergency room
mfw

>>2582995
>Local hospital wants $9k
https://fmma.org/shophealth/

>>2582995
I got something you can use to dilate your esophagus

>>2583024
Yeah, like you'd have anything going more than 2in past the lips if you stick it in

Your post is like pic related, burning heap of thrash

>>2582995
You will never be a real esophagus.

>This man dilated his esophagus with a party balloon. Here's what happened to his stomach.

>>2582995
Join the circus and get paid!

>>2582995
Yeah I would just go to a hospital in Mexico.

>>2582995
just swallow some big icecubes

>>2582995
Presumably you have already had a barium swallow to diagnose the condition.
Honestly, just sort out the 9k to finance this, when the balloon is inserted it is inflated and deflated a number of times to make sure the constriction doesn't reoccur, how you do this DIY I couldn't imagine in my worst nightmares.

>>2583282
This is the solution, OP. Apply 4-5 times every day until you get better. What's the matter, you don't want to save thousands?

>>2582995
Children, this is bait

>>2582995
You're gonna explode your esophagus

>>2582995
Kek. I literally watched my dad slowly die from "esophagus cancer related symptoms", and all the time before that, he was suffering from that esophageal stricture, not able to freely eat, and suffering in starvation for literally months. He felt weak and unmotivated all the time because he just couldn't get the nutrients he needed into his system


Eventually, he died because the hospital decided to cash out his life instead of prolonging it, Because we bought him in for heart problems, which should have just gotten priority treatment as an immediately life threatening condition. But the hospital literally refused to perform the immediate life saving procedures of draining the fluid on his heart, and instead demanded a shit ton of expensive and unnecessary lab work, just to discover that he has cancer, and MAYBE JUST MAYBE THE FLUID ON HIS HEART IS RELATED TO THE CANCER, AND WE NEED TO KNOW THAT FOR SURE, BEFORE RENDING IMMEDIATELY LIFE SAVING HELP

Like, I'm not even joking, the U.S. hospital system literally just decided my dad needed to die so that they could run up all the bills on his insurance

>>2583313
Most hospitals in this country are literally satanic
I'm not a bible thumper, religious, or whatever else
Check the snakes on their logo
Is it the rod of Hermes or the staff of Asclepius?
One means it's a place of healing, the other means it's a house of liars, swindlers, and theives
Satanists absolve themselves by calling you stupid, what they are is in the logo, it's not their fault you saw the logo and chose to stick around

>>2583313
I believe you

>>2583323
The caduceus (rod of hermes) two snakes thing was used by US military related medical groups. Retards will copy and use it as "that medical symbol". E.g. that first aid kit you bought from China. The real symbol is the staff of Aesclepius (one snake; really its probably origin is the parasite dracunculus medinensis - ancient treatment involved wrapping it around a stick and pulling it slowly from the skin over a course of days). It's just like how you will see 10x as many fucked up "EKG" graphics on medical-adjacent things for every plausable one. It's stupidity. US hospitals (and all hospitals) have issues, but it's not some grand conspiracy you'll solve just by checking the number of snakes in the hospital's graphics. That's too simplistic even for a schizo like yourself.
Hanlon's razor.

>>2582998
you're*

>>2583313
Medical malpractice kills 350k per year.

>>2583066
keked and based

>>2582995
Please don't get that procedure.
I'm taking you have dysphagia or achalasia.
I've had achalasia since I was 13 and the first couple times I got the balloon treatment, however this only helps for a little while and your esophagus recovers at some point, every time you do it you get new scar tissue and at some point it'll be so bad that food will stay there for so long that it'll start to rot and crate a bad infection.

I eventually got a different procedure where they cut the muscles in my esophagus so that they won't contract anymore. This really helped and now I only need to drink a bit of water during a meal. I know it's expensive but it'll be better and cheaper in the long run.

If you want to talk with me about this further I can give you my socials I don't often meat people with this problem (especially not of a younger age since achalasia is a older women's disease)

Another question, do you also get the throat cramps every once in a while?

>>2583323

>>2582995
Sing with me: Oh say can you see

>>2582995

Take a drive up to Canada and get it done for like $100.

>>2584377
Or better yet, go down to mexico and come up as an illegal.
>me no speako good english-o, mr border patrol man. Can I have this expensive medical procedure I so direly need...-o?

>>2582995

>>2582995
get as plastered as you can (maybe even consider taking central nervous systems supressants) and ask a friend to shove some random hollowed out stick with a balloon covered in teflon tape (important to sanitize everything first use rubbing alcohol or whatever you can) it will be a fun memory for sure

>>2584148
Ben T?

>>2585207
What do you mean?

>>2585258
Your name, are your initials BT, mine are CS. I have a friend with the initials BT who has the same condition.

>>2585315
Oh no, Mt are my letters. I'm also from the Netherlands which is why I luckily didn't have any of the healthcare problems.

>>2585416
Ah, nvm then. Luckily my friend got diagnosed when he was still on his parents insurance.

>>2582995
This isn't something you can DIY, you need imaging after to make sure you haven't torn your esophagus which is a real, significant risk with this. It's blown up under multiple atmospheres by doctors trained and practices at it, trust me, endoscope footage is hard to decypher if you're not used to it.

>>2582997
meanwhile someone removed their own appendix

>>2585448
And someone also failed. Now the number of failures outway the success for pretty good reason.

>>2585448
A trained surgeon, and the fact he was able to is insane, and not something he would have considered if there were options available to him.

>>2583313
I went to a rehab for monitored professionals (lawyer)

Doctors are fucking retards dude idk how half of those chucklefucks are practicing

>>2585432
Then one tip I can give to give slight temporary relief is to check a lot of break swallow it and push it down with a lot of water. Another more painful method is swallow a cherry tomatoo whole, this will hurt but swallowing will be easier for a bit

>>2585829
>how are they practicing???

Because they're not alcoholic failures like you kek

>>2582995
Threads like this make me remember that tripnigga on /fit/ that did DYI gyno surgery after we memed him into that he has it
literal stuff of nightmares, I get queesy just remembering the updates he posted

maybe they can do it in thailand for less idk, but you shouldn't do this yourself

>>2582995
Keep sucking bigger and bigger dicks.

>>2582995
Why don't you go to Turkey for the surgery it'll cost you half, trip and stay included

>>2585195
You appear to be laboring under some misapprehension, this would be vastly divergent to the actual hospital procedure. The main difference remains, they charge $9k more for it.

>>2585448
That "someone" was a surgeon.

>>2582995
>>2582997
>"a low functioning autistic anon on /diy/ stuck a balloon into his esophagus, this is what happened to his testicles."

>>2587286
PRESENTING
*Sticks up finger*
To the emergency room

>>2587286
>le reddit doctor!

>>2583056
Pic related?

>>2586345
Somebody on /sci/ neutered themselves and posted images.

>>2587308
You have to go back.

>>2583323
Your meds, you need to take them.

>>2584139
[citation needed]

>>2582995
Congrats OP, you hooked a bunch with this tasty bait.

>>2587286
>Doctors hate him! Learn this man's one simple trick for fixing your esophagus at home!

>>2587348
He's off by about 100 thousand.
https://duckduckgo.com/?q=medical+malpractice+death+statistics

>>2582995
are you looking to die of esophageal rupture

>>2587525
What is population growth?
Gimmie ratios of this shit or gtfo.

>>2588725
268 million inb96. 327 in 2016

.358 to .767

The rate of medical death more than doubled.

>>2582995
>>2583282
This is probably your safest and cheapest solution. It is the gayest though. Would you rather someone walk in on you using this or finding you dead in your room, having bled out from some retarded method?

>>2587525
All those deaths are from old fucks who have 30 procedures a year until one finally kills them.
A healthy young man dying from malpractice is few and far between.

>>2589191
Because they never go to the doctor

>>2589192
Im not sure what point you are trying to make.
They "never go to the doctor" because they dont really need to.
And any procedures they are getting done are minor and wont ever be an issue.

The only people who those statistics are relevant to are people old enough to remember the changeover from black and white tv to color.

>>2582995
ask your mom for tips on suppression of the gag reflex

Bro, I had to have this done multiple times as a kid. If you fuck it up, you WILL kill yourself. If you dilate too often, you can irritate your esophagus so much that a hole tears. I had to be put on a ventilator and in a medically induced coma because I'd had too many dilations such a short period of time. I was out for about a week and in the hospital for several months. The solution for me was to just get a surgery to fix my acid reflux disease by making the entrance to my stomach narrower or someshit. I still have to eat slowly and drink a lot of water, but I haven't had to have my throat dilated in two decades.

>>2589185
Kek

>>2583313
i dont go to the doctor ever cuz of shit like this. one time i was completely convinced i had broken my ankle and still didnt go. dont got any idea what was actually wrong with it but couldnt walk on it for 2 or 3 weeks (its completely fine now)

>>2589744
She said "glackshlorkgurgleburp".
Can you translate?

>>2582995
careful someone might find your dead body and assume you were into some kind of kink, especially when they find a second camera going into your asshole

>>2586337
Most doctors are literally drug addicts, with a fuck-ton of mental illnesses, and extremely depressed, kek.
t. someone that knows 3 surgeons, 2 G.P.s, and like 10 nursoids.
>dissecting human beings alive, pushing pills, and spreading lies
>thinking there'd be no consequence to one's mind