/diy/ - Do It Yourself

Funny Diy Stories

>be me
>hanging out with brother in law
>bro buys his wife a brand new charger
>get retard drunk and be rednecks
>"how fast that sumbitch run anon?"
>gives arbitrary number
>"bullshit i dont believe u."
>hop in the car
>do 90mph so we can hit the flats and air the bitch out
>swerve.omfg
>slide and ditch it
>almost die
>drink beer and whiskey and hope no cops come
>drunkard in a sorry about your dick pickup pulls us out
>drink with him
>go back to see wtf we almost die for
>it's a fucking lawnmower hood in the middle of the road...
>small town so grab it to find owner
>hang out the window drunk at 80mph holding on to a wind sail
>try for months to find owner
>give up and toss it beside junk pile just in case owner is found before next load of scrap metal is hauled
>months later get a jeep for free from family friend with no park or reverse and seen more air time than the general lee
>install shitty dual brand amp and wire to door speakers
>rig mp3 player to it
>day one we ramp dried out ponds
>somehow BTFO mp3 player
>beat the shit out of it and it plays Avenged Sevenfold - Bat Country on repeat
>Kek
>hewhomakesabeastoutofhimselfisafraidofbeinaman.repeat
>get drunk af
>descide to pimp out the hillbilly-mobile with shit from junk pile
>see mower hood
>lightbulb.jpg
>cut it down and spot weld it to the hood.
>kek. Actually looks cool as shit
>even wired up the mower headlights

>fast foward 5 years
>been seeing anon mow without a hood this entire time
>get a job with him
>one day discuss hoodless mower
>anon where did you lose it
>in a 1/4 mile stretch where i found it
>Ahahaha, sorry anon i made your brand new lawnmower hood into a fucking redneck hoodscoop 5 years ago here look!
>same model number

>be present day
>drive by about twice a month
>die laughing
>he has no hood

The end.


#showmewhatyougot