/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.9900043]

has /ck/ ever been to medieval times dinner & tournament?

[Anonymous No.9900046]

>>9900043
No but my first thought is that they must be expensive and the food can't be that good.

on the other hand, the show must be pretty cool.

[Anonymous No.9900065]

MOMMY MILKMAIDENS

[Anonymous No.9900071]

yes the chicken was very dry

[Anonymous No.9900075]

>>9900043
She's pretty flat for a fair maiden.

[Anonymous No.9900076]

>>9900043
Yeah, I went once when I was probably 12. We were on the green team and our kingdom was all barbarians. Don't remember a whole lot about the food but I think it was pretty decent. The show was dope as fuck, though.

[Anonymous No.9900084]

>>9900075

and my immersion is ruined with those FUCKING GLASSES
FUCK I WANT TO KILL HER
OR JOUST HER BUTTHOLE OR SOME SHIT

[Anonymous No.9900093]

Parents took me there when I was little. Loved the turkey legs. It was pretty fun

[Anonymous No.9900104]

>>9900043
just don't expect the food to be great, get drunk, enjoy pretending, act like you're 12.

You know, your every day life

[Anonymous No.9900196]

>>9900043
DO

[Anonymous No.9900239]

>>9900043
It is FUN!
Food was bretty good.
They had a friggin falcon flying around,very near the heads of audience.

[Anonymous No.9900254]

>>9900043
The Modern Men, THOTs, and coloreds would ruin the immersion. No thanks.

[Anonymous No.9900257]

>>9900043
No I'm not autistic.

[Anonymous No.9900280]

>>9900043
What's the point?

[Anonymous No.9900292]

>>9900043
>glasses

immersion ruined.

[Anonymous No.9900297]

>>9900254
>The Modern Men, THOTs, and coloreds would ruin the immersion. No thanks.

lol

[Anonymous No.9900343]

>>9900043
Do Americans really do this?

[Anonymous No.9900375]

Let me cast my magic missile wite boi

[Anonymous No.9900440]

>>9900292
That convinces me. I'm moving to Bavaria with the sole objective of snagging beer slinging milk maidens. Tired of the 56%ers over here.

[Anonymous No.9900448]

>>9900046
$39 for dinner and a show its pretty fucking good too i can never finish my meal

[Anonymous No.9900449]

>>9900440
You know germans actually value personal responsibility and hard work, unlike americans who use those terms as euphemisms for "gieb free monies bc im white and Im entitled to muh coal job"?

They're not going to just give you a free job because you're racist. You have to speak german first, among other things.

[Anonymous No.9900455]

>>9900343
americans don't have a history so they have to steal other countries history

[Anonymous No.9900456]

it sucks. its boring and the food is bland and the alcoholic drinks are overpriced.

[Anonymous No.9900465]

was awesome when I was 12
probably still awesome at 26

[Anonymous No.9900481]

>>9900449
found the darkie

[Anonymous No.9900561]

>>9900455
Don’t tell that to Townshend

[Anonymous No.9900569]

>>9900561
>don't tell the guy who shills german "american" homesteading products that their history is borrowed

just like that black bbq guy knows his wife James knows this

[Anonymous No.9900577]

>>9900449
Yes, those white people are just ruining america

[Anonymous No.9900584]

>>9900455
>euroanon said while the entire world actively accepts and spreads american culture
oh haha

[Anonymous No.9900725]

>>9900254
This but for serious

[Anonymous No.9900738]

>>9900449
>You know germans actually value personal responsibility and hard work
That's why Bismarck realized he needed to create a welfare state or why Merkel needs to import darkies?

[Anonymous No.9900857]

You go there mostly for the novelty and entertainment, not really for the food even though the food is passably decent. It's more expensive than going to see a movie or grabing a few drinks at a bar with friends but less expensive than a ballgame or amusement park.

[Anonymous No.9900875]

>>9900043
Back in my LoTR fanboy days I went to medieval/fantasy events. The food was very simple, but bretty good. The meat was pretty dry though.

[Anonymous No.9900932]

I've been to Dolly Parton's Dixie Stampede in Branson, MO which isn't medieval, but it has many of the same elements. It's a blend of Native American and cowboy/"Western"/southern culture. You get a whole chicken (bigger than a cornish hen but smaller than a rotisserie at Kroger), half of a roasted potato, cream of vegetable soup, apple turnover, and some other stuff that I can't recall at the moment. Food was decent for what it was, and the show was entertaining. It's a minor complaint, but some improv would have been nice. It felt over-rehearsed.

[Anonymous No.9900939]

>>9900738
not on either side of this argument but, are you seriously saying you can judge a countrys morals based on the idiots who manage to get funded into office?

[Anonymous No.9900946]

>>9900932
>wwnt to branson
>didn't see shoji

[Anonymous No.9900957]

>>9900932
>"we got any indians out in the crowd tonight...? you know MY indian name would be walks bowlegged.... heh... heh how about you clem?"
"gosh I dunno boy is my face red"
"guess your indian name is clem then"
*white hayseeds applaud and eat cream soup*

[Anonymous No.9900965]

>>9900043
>all that loose floppy fabric where the tits are supposed to be
made me kuk

[Anonymous No.9900968]

>>9900939
>Otto Von Fucking Bismark
>Idiot
Retard detected

[Anonymous No.9900969]

Yes, it's a bunch of LARPing autistics and shrieking, attention-seeking girls. The food and drinks are more than excellent, however.

[Anonymous No.9900972]

>>9900946
Do you normally go somewhere and only do one thing?

Yeah, me neither.

[Anonymous No.9900976]

I went when I was a kid. It was fun as fuck. They gave us like an entire chicken to pull apart and unlimited refills of coke. That and the "fighting" was all kid me required for a good time.

[Anonymous No.9900978]

>>9900043
Grandparents took me and my sisters when we were young, I think I was 7/8. It was a lot of fun and the jousting was pretty damn cool. I remember enjoying the turkey leg, but other than that I don't remember the food.

[Anonymous No.9900981]

>>9900969
>The food and drinks are more than excellent, however.
The absolute shit taste of this board always amazed me. I wasn't even that discerning when I was like 12/13 and knew it was slimy underseasoned overcooked turkey (because the LAST thing they need was someone to complain about slightly pink turkey) and bland food. Don't get me wrong, the show is entertaining and the atmosphere is fun but the food is fast food tier.

[Anonymous No.9900985]

>>9900981
I haven't even been to one before, and I could tell just from common sense the food would be shit.

[Anonymous No.9900987]

>>9900976
This perfectly captures my experience. Great birthday gift for a kid

[Anonymous No.9900990]

>>9900280
What's the point of anything?

[Anonymous No.9901009]

>>9900981
A general question was asked, a general answer was given. Based on your response, you went to a overhyped, commercialized event where exactly THAT is served (see Amsterdam light festival, or Elfia Fair). It's all about profit from there.

[Anonymous No.9901016]

>>9900981
>but the food is fast food tier.

It's definitely a step up from "fast food tier" at least but still below even casual dining places like Chili's or Applebee's. People go there for the show and experience, not really for the food.

[Anonymous No.9901031]

>>9901009
No I went to medieval nights and it was decent but the food is mediocre.
>>9901016
You're not wrong. And honestly people who are going to those don't really have many complaints about the food they're served. I'd like to go as an adult now though, do they serve authentic, if shitty, mead? And maybe I'll pick up a cheap replica sword.

[Anonymous No.9901224]

>>9900043
I imagine its not accurate medieval food though, what with the sour meat gelatin piles and similar real life crap not being served

[Anonymous No.9901313]

>All these fucking boring ass white people

I thought you were better than this /ck/. Medieval Times sucks: the seats are too cramped together, food is shit, and the show is mediocre.

Buying a whole rotisserie chicken and watching the directors cut of Kingdom of Heaven is an infinitely better experience

[Anonymous No.9901324]

I went to it as a kid (as a field trip) and I remember liking it

[Anonymous No.9901331]

>>9900043
I have been to medieval times, food was pretty bland and the people were annoying as hell

[Anonymous No.9901401]

Wait, that's a real thing and not just from the cable guy?

[Anonymous No.9901514]

>>9901401
It's real.

[Anonymous No.9901561]

>>9901313

t. lonely faggot whose parents never took them anywhere

[Anonymous No.9901702]

>>9900449
you don't need to speak german...that's about the dumbest thing i've read on this board.

[Anonymous No.9901710]

Never been but would attend if I could find a wench to accompany me.

[Anonymous No.9901727]

isnt the show the same every time?

[Anonymous No.9901746]

>>9900449
>They're not going to just give you a free job because you're racist. You have to speak german first, among other things.

But rapefugees get free moneys regardless, in most aspects things are better set up than in the US.

[Anonymous No.9901880]

>ren fair
>go buy turkey leg
>cashier surf is a black teen
>experience ruined

[Anonymous No.9901947]

>>9900043
No but I'd go in a fucking second

[Anonymous No.9901996]

How are the turkey legs?

I had a bad experience with a smoked turkey leg I bought at a grocery store. Skin was so tough it was inedible. Total shoe leather.

[Anonymous No.9901998]

>>9900448
Where I live it's $62.95 for an adult.

>>9900043
>>9900046
I've been there a bunch of times..
When I was young the camp I went to would go once a year. Then in grade school we went on a field trip there I think more than once and the last time I went was about 2 years because of a work related outing.

It's honestly pretty good. The show is entertaining and the food is good too. You get drinks, dragon soup which is a vegetable soup, bread & butter IIRC, and then roasted chicken that's pretty juicy and good and I think dessert but I'm not sure. They also have a bar and you can drink.

[Anonymous No.9902009]

>medieval show
>no suckling pig
>turkey>medieval

[Anonymous No.9902041]

>>9901313
t. "Person" of color who had no dad to take them

[Anonymous No.9902049]

>>9901313
Just because your father skipped out when you were three doesn't mean you've got to shit on a family dining experience you smelly fucking coon.

[Anonymous No.9902088]

>>9902049
Not him, but if my parents had tried to drag me to one of those places I probably would have gone nuclear on their ass.

[Anonymous No.9902133]

>>9902088
>C'mon anon... cheer for your knight!
>Ohh looo, anon, a turkey leg I know how much you like turkey legs and coke!
>Thank the nice bespectacled wench, anon

yeah it seems like if you're a stick in the mud you would not have a good time there as a man or as a child

[Anonymous No.9902165]

>>9900043
I went to a medieval fair and ate a turkey leg (inaccurate, new world food I know) while watching an outdoor tournament

[Anonymous No.9902167]

>>9900932
I don't understand why they don't sell bbq there

[Anonymous No.9902281]

>go to Minnesota Renaissance Festival
>it's supposed to be a medieval village
>there's no bakery, only contemporary garbage food

[Anonymous No.9902835]

>>9900084
Her fucking latex gloves made my dicc limp

[Anonymous No.9902925]

>>9900075
Does that white bread not ruin your immersion? Back then, white flour was too expensive for commoners because it was made by manually sifting through linens. Whole wheat sourdough or gtfo.

[Anonymous No.9902970]

>>9902925
there's no immersion is a dinner show

[Anonymous No.9902993]

This is my kind of thread.

[Anonymous No.9903002]

[Anonymous No.9903013]

[Anonymous No.9903267]

>>9902835
>not getting hard dicc from latex gloves
whats wrong with you

[Anonymous No.9903296]

Where the fuck are these things?

Lived in Alabama all my life and I've never heard of it.

[Anonymous No.9903310]

>>9903013
will they let you in if you show up in a cowboy costume instead?

[Anonymous No.9903328]

>>9900084
>JOUST HER BUTTHOLE

[Anonymous No.9903334]

Went once as part of a middle school trip, it was pretty dope. We called all of the opposing team members filthy milk drinkers for some reason.

[Anonymous No.9903336]

the only one that had good food was Arabian Nights

[Anonymous No.9903350]

>>9900448
>$39 for dinner and a show
>>9901998
>Where I live it's $62.95 for an adult.


Pssh $80.25 here.

[Anonymous No.9903359]

>>9900449
yeah man the US would be a literal utopia without those pesky white people you're a real forward thinker i can tell

[Anonymous No.9903385]

>>9903359
Well, fewer of them in any case. The world still needs ditch diggers and I don't mind if some of you are white. To be honest I don't see color - I refuse to reduce you people to stereotypes about low test scores, bad work ethic, or bad hygiene. Some of my best friends are white.

[Anonymous No.9903418]

i went there when i was very young, and loved it. i'm not from the US and had never eaten a turkey, so I was amazingly impressed by huge "chicken drumstick" they served. also, my knight won the competition, wich was pretty great.

[Anonymous No.9903578]

Yeah. I was really young so I can't give a good review of the food. But my knight won and that was cool.

[Anonymous No.9903658]

>>9903418
>>9903578
you don't need to post twice, asshat

[Anonymous No.9903663]

>>9903658
NEVER respond to my posts again

[Anonymous No.9903670]

>>9900738
Bismark did whatever it took to keep himself in power lul.

[Anonymous No.9903672]

>>9901313
All death is certain.

[Anonymous No.9903676]

the jousting is rehearsed and the winner is decided in advance.

as cringe it may be, your local renaissance festival actually pays winning jousters more so there's genuine competition there.

[Anonymous No.9903866]

Yes. It's a fun time. Food was fine. Not top notch but you're going for the experience.

[Anonymous No.9903954]

>>9903578
Congrats on the win! I'm >>9903418

>>9903658
you're just butthurt because your knight was probably the shit one that does not even get to come back as a traitor and lose in the end.

[Anonymous No.9903960]

DOWN DOWN DOWN
RED KNIGHT'S GOIN DOWN

[Anonymous No.9903985]

>>9903954
why are you replying to yourself now

[Anonymous No.9904072]

>>9903385
>parents working two jobs most of full time for 30k a year
Man America is doomed.

[Anonymous No.9904105]

>>9903296
The main company that does them has locations in California, Texas, Florida, New Jersey, Illinois, South Carolina, Maryland and Georgia. I know of a couple that aren't in those states, so there must be some other companies doing the same kind of thing.

[Anonymous No.9904130]

>>9901996
>I had a bad experience with a smoked turkey leg I bought at a grocery store. Skin was so tough it was inedible. Total shoe leather.
same

[Anonymous No.9904145]

>>9904130
if a grocery store cooks anything... watch out.

[Anonymous No.9904156]

>>9900075
to be fair i dont think a majority of the "fair maidens" are well endowed they just know how to rock a corset and duck tape
>used to date one of them
>the pussy was good tho

[Anonymous No.9904172]

>>9903385
I feel like the fact that it has to say "real median" may take away some of its validity. That's just me thought.

[Anonymous No.9904193]

>>9900043
I went to one when I was about 14 when we traveled from Washington to Kentucky via military movements. We stopped in vegas, part of that stop was to keep the kids busy watching a show. Food was ok, show was ok. Other than that I don't remember much because it wasn't that fun.

[Anonymous No.9904199]

>>9900292
Its pretty impressive that she can hold that much liquid in a hand.
Those Glasses are like a couple pounds a piece. Does /ck/ think she'd rip your dick off?

[Anonymous No.9904223]

>>9904193
I went to the one in Vegas a few years back.

Nothing memorable about the food, though I'm pretty sure it was overpriced.

Show was fun though. Make sure you cheer for your knight and talk shit to all the others. The more you play along the more entertained you'll be.

[Anonymous No.9904237]

>>9903385
>be asian and hispanic
>go to medieval times 300 days a year
>live out of truck

[Anonymous No.9904265]

]It was unrealistic, I didn't have a 1/4 chance of dying before I was 10

[Anonymous No.9904277]

This thread makes me want to watch that Cable Guy scene

[Anonymous No.9904282]

It's a pretty good time. They have discounts alot where you get the best package for about 40 bucks a person, which isn't terrible since you're getting a show along with decent food. Chicken has been good for me every time, along with the soup and the garlic bread. Corn and potato are the worst part.

[Anonymous No.9904286]

>>9904282
Whoops, pic related

[Anonymous No.9904289]

>>9904286

[Anonymous No.9904297]

>>9904286
>>9904289
boston market should just rebrand and have sword fight pits instead of their giant empty dining areas.

[Anonymous No.9904310]

I went my first time as an adult, I had a great time. I in-character heckled a rival knight so hard that he pointed my lance at me and asked what I was saying. Food was decent too

[Anonymous No.9904311]

>>9900043
Went there a couple times, once as a kid and once with my niece. Food would be meh on its own I guess, it's still a fun time though.

[Anonymous No.9904416]

>>9904310
>ywn get drunk and yell at knights at medieval times with /ck/

[Anonymous No.9904466]

>>9901313
Hi cooley, sorry but the world is reverting back to hating darkies and not giving you a free pass to be a fearless belligerent groid about whiteness anymore, feel free to revert to being scared, uncertain about your future and hated.

[Anonymous No.9904521]

>>9904416
I didn't know I had this feel anon...

[Anonymous No.9904530]

>>9904310
You would have probably been executed or forced into slavery for doing this in medieval times, obnoxious ameriblob

[Anonymous No.9904581]

>>9904416
/ck/ meetup at medieval times when
>tfw we get any knight other than red/yellow

[Anonymous No.9904590]

>>9904530
>No fun allowed
>>9904416
That would be really fun. But lets never have a /ck/ meetup because that shit is autism

[Anonymous No.9904609]

>>9900043
>Mom takes me as a little kid
>I never really associated medieval times with Europe as a region due to fantasyshit when I was little, just some sort of weird global period of time where shit was knighty.
>Wear the knight costume I got for halloween
>Friendly wench says they weren't expecting a black knight in the audience.
>I'm thinking that means I'm the shit because you know the black knight is the coolest motherfucking knight, so I'm happy.
>Mom starts going off at wench for talking to me that way.
>She throws her plate at the wench
>I have no idea what's going on
>Security kicks us out
>Mom tells me in the car that the woman wasn't complimenting me, she was being racist.
>My mom escalated the situation and ruined my experience over a possible insult that went over my head anyway.

[Anonymous No.9904636]

>>9900084

[Anonymous No.9904639]

>>9900084
> JOUST HER BUTTHOLE

[Anonymous No.9904644]

>>9904609
>they weren't expecting a black knight in the audience.
I don't care if this happened or not I love it.

[Anonymous No.9904673]

>>9904609
You stole this story from that dumb nog commercial.

[Anonymous No.9904764]

>>9902088
I bet this post sounded pretty badass in your head.

[Anonymous No.9904768]

>>9904764
>That's it, I'm going NUCLEAR
>shits pants
>loses good boy points
>flips tendies

[Anonymous No.9904793]

Waste of money, just spend your money at a nice restaurant. For $60-80 you can have an amazing meal. Medieval Times looks like a rip-off.

[Anonymous No.9904800]

>>9904673
No I didn't

[Anonymous No.9904813]

>>9900043
I had my first sexual encounter at one of those

[Anonymous No.9905166]

>>9901880
Black people were a thing in medieval europe
They just weren't common they were very rare barely any

[Anonymous No.9905173]

>>9900043
>No but my first thought is that they must be expensive and the food can't be that good.
You were absolutely right.

>on the other hand, the show must be pretty cool.
You are absolutely wrong.

It's a silly dull thing for children. If you're an adult, you'll wonder why you wasted the money on shitty roast chicken that you could have gotten better from Costco for $6.

[Anonymous No.9905180]

>>9900449
>You know germans actually value personal responsibility and hard work, unlike americans who use those terms as euphemisms for "gieb free monies bc im white and Im entitled to muh coal job"?
Just shout "Allahu Ackbar!" and tell anyone who tries to deport you that they're racist Nazis. The krauts will spread their fair maidens' legs and hold them down for you to rape.

[Anonymous No.9905347]

>>9904172
>inflation is a hoax
You really think the average black head of household in 1965 was earning a nominal $30k annual income?

[Anonymous No.9905366]

>>9900043
Went there for a middle school trip. Was great

[Anonymous No.9905374]

>>9904609
haha

[Anonymous No.9905375]

>>9905180
>The krauts will spread their fair maidens' legs and hold them down for you to rape.
I guess they learned from the USSR that resistance is futile

[Anonymous No.9905424]

>>9900440
Sharia not gonna allow that any more. You must have legos to stop the vans of peace.

[Anonymous No.9905429]

>>9900196
Du Hast

[Anonymous No.9905522]

>>9900043
Yes and there was this foreign girl sitting next to me with giant boobs and I whacked it later to the thought of her

[Anonymous No.9906018]

>>9900448
The one I went to in L.A. was $90 per adult. The show was good and so was the food, but it was a bit overpriced. $50 to 60 would be fair.

I was going hard for the Red Knight, but he lost. I'd do it again, but not at the $90 price point.

[Anonymous No.9906100]

>>9905166
>Black people were a thing in medieval europe

Ask me how I know you're American

[Anonymous No.9906158]

>>9905522
>I whacked it later
Come one man, at least say you polished your spear or something.

[Anonymous No.9907305]

>>9900084
kekd

[Anonymous No.9907310]

food's pretty bad but the show is worth it
i have a souvenir cup sitting next to me

[Anonymous No.9907331]

>>9900449
those damn coal miners have such an easy life

[Anonymous No.9907364]

>>9906100
Southern yurop had the moors who were as black as the souls frying in hell, so there's that.

[Anonymous No.9907378]

>>9902167
Why would they?

[Anonymous No.9907384]

>>9900043
i went with my family to the one in myrtle beach and it was bretty gud. food was decent

[Anonymous No.9907986]

>>9903013
Escondido

[Anonymous No.9908607]

>>9907364

They were mostly Berbers (white) and Arabs. The Sahara desert is massive (about the size of the US) and mostly impassable. There weren't many subsaharan (black) migrants into North Africa.

[Anonymous No.9908675]

>>9900043
>Pay a shit load of money to watch re-enactments of jousting while you eat in a coliseum style arena.

I'd rather go to Dave and Busters, at least they have video games. Though if I remember correctly I think Medievil Times sells like fake swords and weaponry, always thought that was cool. Of course it's grossly overpriced.