/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>9814762

>>9814770

>>9814770

>>9814856
>that dribble at the end


HNNNNNNNGGGGGGGG

>>9814760
Holy shit, that is impressive.

>>9814766
>cutting the hand you're holding the knife with

almost impressive

>>9814760
damn

>>9814776

this is the dumbest shit I've ever seen. it's not any faster than using a proper technique and it's reinforcing a terrible habit of cutting towards yourself

>>9815162
[Darude Sandstorm intensifies]

>>9815162
unsanitary

>>9814760
That's amazing!

>>9814817
This posses me off

>>9815196
So you can carve ice...now do it with precision with a chainsaw like most ice sculptists do

>>9815196
>one grass of ice
>rou tip?

>>9815196
Literally a waste of time. Anybody who's willing to pay for this pretentious crap deserves to get overcharged.

>>9815196
I hate this.

>>9815304
stop this

>>9815310
desu senpai tastes great with some honey mustard

>>9815310
Looks better than I thought it would

I just want to say I'm enjoying all of the new content lately. keep it up encoders

>>9814786
wat dis from

>>9814754
Just like my wife. Never swallows

>>9814776
>*taps the knife*

>>9815013
looks good, but the refrigeration seems unnecessary

>>9815363
>>taps the knife*

>>9815358
Lurk more, newfag

>>9814751
>that filename

>>9814770
how the fuck does he get out of there without breaking the eggs?

>>9814754
I love Peruvian food.

>>9814751
>>9815394

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N9-7uLg-DZU

>>9815265
You literally have to be invited to even be allowed to pay for this crap, so I wouldn't worry too much

>>9815399
god bless you anon

>>9815304
Wouldn't this make more sense if they were glazed donuts? In fact she's kind of pussying out by using plain ones.

>>9815363
>>9815369
Assholes.

>>9814746

>>9815399
I had this idea last thread you're welcome.

>>9814786
>you don't have to tell me anything
>you just have to eat this

Someone post the screenshot this is based on please!

>>9815475
What is the stuff she piles on from the big pot

>>9815013
>that pixelation as the beer can is shoved up the bird's ass
>>>/h/

>>9815322
yo Tsukiji fish market is cool and all but the fish smells is overpowering and there is stanky fish water fucking everywhere, like my sneakers were drenched by the time i was done walking through that place. but i did score some bombass squid jerky and got to see some tinned whale meat.

>>9814762
mmm corn oooze

>>9815554
I think it's corn

>>9815500
I stole it from you, sorry anon

>>9815322
I can't imagine a fish that big actually tastes too good

>>9815669
Do you not like tuna?

>>9815671
Your girl aint too bad, but I've had better.

>>9814817
everyy fcjing thread

>>9815147
do you not see the metal glove on her hand

>>9815686
You could always make some OC rather than bitching about your helpings like the subservient faggot you are

>>9814817
avocado literally has the same fucking texture as butter
what the fuck is with this trend of just eating giant fucking chunks of it
I hate this planet
also the yolk split, fuck him he can't do anything right

>>9815013

Looks good, but why not use a good beer instead?

>>9815162
>tfw Italian

>>9814751
on my god

is the crab ok?

>>9814856
why would anyone even think of doing this

>>9815786
did he died?

>>9815577
this is one of the dumbest things I've ever fucking seen for food.

It's like a strawberry rebuilt to be ice cream but probably shittier in every way and overly sweet.

>>9815786
Tyson Chicken™

"Making nuggets and vegans since 1992"

>>9815196
Why are the japanese like this?

>>9815013
hmm, delicious toxic paint

>>9815183
it's not like he'r gonna backe it afterward.... right?

>>9815013
>heating up a aluminium can inside your food

ffs they now make stainless steel containers for this so you don't wind up eventually poisoning yourself.

>>9815304
Is that why the USA are nearly at war with Korea?

>>9815552
>"How to get hypertension for 20$"

>>9815736
lava is full of toxic shit that's really not a good idea.

>>9815013
>onion powder
>garlic powder
y tho

>>9815743
Guacamole is pretty decent to put on a burrito, but I don't get the trend at all either.

>>9815162
I'd fire the cunt for taking too long to make pizzas, to be honest.

>>9815265
It's pretty common in bars in Japan that cost over $5 a drink to drink at.

>>9815363
It helps you to orient yourself in space to provide for a more predictable outcome you fucking nigger.

>>9815786
I'm frying chicken right now.

Is it bad that I really like watching chefs kill animals (as long as they're not mammals)?

>>9814770
>That filename
Nice

>>9815396
He has to cook them all before he's allowed to leave

>>9815363
>*triggers autism*

>>9814760
Impressive.

>>9816025
well shit, no wonder he's so surly then

>>9814770
>>9815396
>>9816025
>>9816060

Am I having a stroke? I feel like this is actually the 5th time I've seen this exact conversation

>>9816080
Welcome to /ck/.

>>9815577
What a waste of time

>>9814760
imm a cut this shit but hold on let me dull the fuck out of these nails so i can look cool

>>9815147
i mean it is slightly faster but not enough to be worth it

>>9815874
I really don't understand how someone could be hungry after this

>>9815623
>squid jerky
tell more, ive never considered dried seafood

>>9816132
It's supposed to be dead, right?

>>9816167
Meh. Dead, alive... a chinaman doesn't care much one way or the other.

>>9815736
Haven't there been tourists who fall into lava pools due to unstable surfaces in places like that

>>9814751
Is this what skynet has planned for us?

>>9815162
>>>>>Uses training pizza blank
>>>>>not real dough
>>>>>zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

>>9814751
mankind was a mistake

>>9815912
It was part of a thing to get "pizza dancing" recognised by UNESCO as a protected cultural artform like flamenco and yoga

>>9814751

>>9815196
jesus christ, favreau, it's just ice

>>9816080
There are certain images that if you post there is a stock reply you will get. I will demonstrate.

>>9816512
not sure if handicapped or just clowning for the customers

>>9816512
>>9816515
And boom goes the dynamite. Thanks for playing.

>>9816516
This isn't the same without the interstellar music

>>9816503
This looks like something out of Quake

>>9816512
This guy has autism or aspergers I absolutely guarantee it

>>9816527
Or Parkinsons, as the filename suggests.

>>9816503

>>9816515
Pay attention. He spreads the cocain on his gums

>>9816522
Somebody post this.

>>9814770
bruh
i would eat the shit out of that

>>9814817
ketofags are cancer

>>9815162
is that christopher meloni

>>9816162
Not that guy, but squid jerky is pretty good. Dried cuttlefish is fantastic.

>>9815304
I was expecting puke porn tßh

>>9815864
my thoughts exactly

>>9815196
"after an hour of hard work, I have perfectly cut this ice to the shape of a cup"

>why not just freeze water inside of the cup

"I...uh..."

>>9814770
>His punishment for stealing an egg in previous life

>>9815736
edward penis hands

>>9815322

>>9815786
For anyone wondering, this is a macerator that they use to kill sickly or male chicks on egg farms. These aren't being ground up to use as food.

>>9815799
to attract a m8, m8

>>9816656
>or male
So it's ok to murder a living thing simply because it was born as male?

>>9816633
So it's clear ice.

>>9816665
use better water

>>9816623
Didn't think the ink would run out so fast

>>9816672
Sure dood

>>9816512
Did he do a bump of coke?

>>9816686
I mean what's he doing with pinky in nose? The customers don't like ti see someone do that while handling food.

>>9816660
only if its white

>>9815465
>Wouldn't this make more sense if they were glazed donuts?
Would it really, anon?

>>9816633
That breaks the glass.

>Have to eat chocolates in numerical order
>Cannot start the next one till you finished the rest
>Cannot rip off the doors or you lose
LA Beast does it again

>>9814770
kek'd at the filename

>>9815874
What even is this creature?

Also
>Nutted but she still sucking

>>9816167
It's missing a head, so yeah it's dead

>>9815586
it's probably because they didn't have permission to show the label of the beer.

>>9816707
there's ways around it.
the point is that you don't have to sculpt it by hand from a square block. there are other ways to mold an ice cube.

>>9815013
>pbr

>>9814760
not that impressive if you know how to use a knife. first of all, the whole nails through a board thing is a classic physics demonstration of pressure = force / area. just search "bed of nails" if you want an explanation for why a balloon wouldn't pop when pushed against multiple nails. next, the cleaver is extremely sharp, so he's basically just letting the knife do the work. the blindfold is essentially pointless. if you know how to hold the food and rock with it in thin slices, the demonstration is basically muscle memory.

>>9815304
there's some kind of sexual innuendo here

>>9816738
Everyone knows that. The process gives it value. People don't go to bars to buy drinks; they buy drinks to be at bars.

>>9816646
heem sleepy

>>9815173
lel

>>9816488
Yeah, but then there's vapefags...

>>9815554
>>9815639
looks like garbanzos to me

>>9816747
Bed of nails is not the same as four nails.

>>9816515
LIKE A CLOCKWORK

>>9814786
YOU HAVE TO EAT ALL THE EGGS

>>9814770
>filename
>not surly king of the egg fort
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>9816705
is that Asian chick nearby? I've got a semi on standby.

>>9816738
you're not paying attention, the dude makes a diamond shape.

A few spam themed ones, inspired by the spam thread.

CNN report on Japan's spam burger.

>>9815162
Yeah, me too, like a pizza that has been collecting dust from rolling on a pizza artisans' arms and legs for forever

>>9816504
Like a clockwork

>>9816841
I like the kid grimacing before going ham, it's like the hesitation before slitting wrists

>>9816845
Why is he using a folding knife in a kitchen?

>>9816840
use a diamond mold

>>9816845

Why is he using a fucking folding knife, also holy shit those poor drowned eggs

>>9816512
Heroin is helluva of a drug

>>9816845
>cooking egg with chopsticks
>cutting nread with folding knife
What a stupid fag

>>9816845
>spam instead of real ham, sausage, or belly
>disgusting amounts of oil
>untoasted bun
>no cheese
>separated eggs with broken yolk

what exactly is ultimate about this? it's a slightly more expensive mcdonald's sandwich

>>9816665
you can have clear ice by using boiling water that goes right into the freezer

Some more eggslut cause you guys liked him so much.

>>9816878
that's really fucking inefficient

>>9816875
That sandwich is shit, but the bread was toasted, I'll give them that, at least. Not that I'd expect much from a restaurant called Eggslut.

>>9816885
then I guess I better grab my ice pick for maximum efficiency

>>9816883
Just salt and sugar?
I guess one might as well try it once.

>>9816885
how? It takes all of 5 minutes to boil water and no effotr at all to fill your tray and stow it in the freezer. If you happen to have cup shaped ice trays than its simple as that.

In what world is that inefficient?

>>9816901
that's corn in that cup! That's genius!

>>9816846
Spam there is of better quality than it is in the US though.

>>9816875
He actually makes a version with pork chops instead of spam for philistines like you that can't appreciate the subtle nuances of spam.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PQe9hnkCDTQ

>>9816905
subtle nuances of SALT

this one looks much better desu

>>9816700
Well I admit I don't fully understand what the appeal of this video is meant to be, but I figure the sticky glaze would at least be reminiscent of cumming (jizz) on her face.

>>9815864
it seems like no matter what job they have, no matter how menial it is, japs have an obsession with becoming masters at it.
I'm sure that this guy's only job is cutting ice and he's spent his whole life under a ice cutting master to become the best at it.

not that there's anything wrong with it, I guess taking pride in your work is always virtue

>>9815669
tuna and whale taste great

>>9816899
inefficient for the fridge, since you're heating the freezer unnecessarily

>>9817001
are you really worried about the effects that a few cups of hot water at most have on a goddamn freezer?

>>9817014
yes

>>9817014
I think you can break it this way, better not to do it

>>9814776
>tapping the knife.

why do retards actually do this

>>9817041
no you can't you stupid fuck

but you will raise the temperature of the entire freezer which is bad for the contents and will increase energy consumption to return it to equilibrium.

>>9815906
>niggers

>>9817048
it makes fridge use up its potential faster, thus breaking it. Better avoid doing this stuff altogether

>>9814754
What a strange potato

>>9815552
the bacon is fucking raw

>>9817053
so does watching TV on your TV

or typing on your keyboard

or sitting on your bed

or drinking your soy milk

>>9815577
>that'll be $80 each plus tip.

>>9816660
ask the chinese,

they've been mass aborting females since the one child policy

>>9817056
you can use your bed normally or be morbidly obese thus cutting its life expectancy

>>9815786
at least it's quick damn.

>>9815786
EVERY TIME I SEE THIS WEBM IT MAKES ME ANGRY

>>9817048
>and will increase energy consumption to return it to equilibrium.

I think you can tank the dollar extra on your bill, Scott

>>9816512
picking his fucking nose
gets me every time.

>>9817062
if you're some fagot who sleeps for 8.5 hours a night instead of 8, you might as well just throw away your bed now

>>9817061
>one child policy

what year do you think it is?

>>9815799
Practice for deepthroating. If the butter get stuck it will melt on its own

>>9816904
seeing as it's a US import, no it's fucking not

>>9815475

>>9817072
I think being obese is gonna push the boundaries of bed's endurance faster than sleeping .5 hours more

>>9814746
When I watch OP's webm, my first afterthought is "craft" and "skill". Show me Jiro pulling that kind of shit with a piece of fish+rice, then we'll talk.

>>9815162
Wow, the pancake autist has really improved.

>>9817121

The sushi-haters are even more unbearable than vegans in how they have to shoehorn their ideology into every conversation

>>9815786
Are they ok?

>>9814754
Fat cunt

>>9815304
This girl must be extremely rich.

>>9816080
Redditors do this all the time. They will see a funny or clever response, and then just repeat that whenever the specific image is posted.
I hate Hiro for not having them banned on sight.

>>9815220
Most ice sculptors use the similar tools to wood carvers, the chainsaw is only for beginning a piece.

>>9817345
>soyboy attempts eating like a man.webm

>>9817356
who, aside from professional athletes, in their right mind would eat 4k+ calories a day every day?

>>9817345
Just thinking about eating fast food for every meal and drinking soda all day makes me feel like shit

>>9816646
I was in that thread

>>9817364
Anyone who spends 2k+ calories every day, for example, a man

>>9817356
to be fair that is just way too much fucking soda

>>9814817
This is why millennial can't afford houses.

>>9816841
I like spam

>>9815577
science has truly gone too far

>>9817376
2k is not 4k. Most full-sized men have a BMR of around 1800 to 2200. Warren Buffet does not work in construction, he is a businessman, so there's no way his TDEE should exceed 2500 calories. The only reason for the extra calories is if he exercises to the point of burning 1500 calories a day, which would come out to 2.5 hours of full-intensity, active exercise (3 hours if your breath-catching breaks between intervals add up to 30 minutes).

This is not a "manly" amount of food, this is the diet of a professional athlete or pure excess.

>>9816503
>Mr. Krabbs Wild Ride

>>9817446
oh yeah, the alternative is just that he does a shitload of uppers, which wouldn't surprise me. Lines of cocaine and speed just burn right through your caloric consumption.

>>9814751
this deeply upsets me

>>9814751
>This kills the crab

>>9815304
ok that got a genuine laugh out of me

>>9816895
get these hotheads out of here!

>>9816845
I can hear his breathing through the screen

>>9815786
needs more cannibal corpse

/ck/ keeping it FRESH with all these NEW webms.

>>9816623
xenos execution.webm

>>9817364
Donald Trump does it. Successful men eat big to get big. Both Trump and Buffet are very successful, so I would say that it's the successful man diet.

>>9817345
he's probably kept alive by expensive doctors and pure greed

>>9817446
didn't you watch Death Note? :^)

>>9816640
underrated post

>>9816684
it's not ink
they turn their chromatophores black to imitate the pavement
then central nervous system control goes away and the chromatophores default to zero, so you see their real color

>>9815208
>CARMELLA!

>>9817548
Headlines regarding Trump’s diet are retarded. I would call him a degenerate when it comes to food but that’s the last thing I’m concerned about when it comes to him.

>>9814760
why do asians do this shit

who cares

>>9815368
brining, my dude. although to be fair i think you'd need to refrigerate it longer to get a good brine.

>>9816883
gots to be MAPP gas

>>9817494

>>9815475
ebin! XD

>>9815396
one does not simply /leave/ the egg fort

>>9816846
>cnn
FAYK NOOSE

>>9816660
Sorta. If they don't kill the males off this way they are going to murder each other anyways.
Chickens are murderous, cannibalistic monsters. Especially the male ones, as they are competing for the females.

>>9816909
Decadent af

>>9815471
>that drawing
what the fuck are you doing here dennis

>>9817121
>my first afterthought is "craft" and "skill".
after reading that post, my first afterthought is "ignorant" and "stupid".

>>9817932

>>9816167
its an eel, its very dead but an eels body is basically one giant muscle so it has a ton of spasms n shit after it dies. i dont think eels feel shit in life either desu.

>>9816660
>So it's ok to murder a living thing simply because it was born as male?
FEMINISM 101

>>9818303
Man are useless except as sperm doners

>>9816516
>scientifically proven

>>9816254

>>9818364
Not sure how it's /ck/ related but fuck that was hilarious

Imagine that being your final moment

>>9817626
>this is considered important news nowadays
Man, they are desperate for any story involving the president.

>>9818331
>grow up in hispanic household
>parents and grandparents put lime on mcfucking EVERYTHING
>can't stand lime now
at least a have an acquired taste for pineapple soda

>>9815874
I hate asian culture's boner for eating things so fresh theyre still alive. For god's sake swiftly kill it when it arrives at the table and then cook it. It's like they enjoy watching it suffering unnecessarily. They have a sick sadistic insect-like mentality.

>>9818393
It's already dead you fucking idiot.

>>9815736
>>9816254
It's not so much the lava that kills
It's the gasses that getcha first

>>9818259
>>9818393

>>9818364
>>9818364
What a dipshit.

>>9818460
>>9818369
its fucking fake. lava doesn't flow like water.
you are a subhuman moron for thinking its real.

>>9814760

he needs to sharpen his nails

>>9818393
>meat comes from the store

>>9818364
They definitely didnt just recolor the ocean orange to look like lava.

>>9818493
How can you explain the flames and explosion then, Sherlock???

>>9818488
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-HeHvvSch1I

>>9818497
I hope you're just japing friend

>>9818196
damn was this real?

>>9818529
No it was a pracitcal joke by him but I remember it went down really poorly, a lot of people complained because they were traumatized

>>9818497
Ever seen those volcano scientists that go close to lava for science? Ever notice they wear full body heat resistant suits? Ever think maybe it's because if they got that close to that much lava they'd be roasted? See how she isn't wearing one?? She would be burning before losing her footing.

>>9818364

fake and gay

>>9818529
he's known for playing pranks on people

>>9818398
Nigga you blind or stupid?

>>9816747
>basically muscle memory

yeah thats what makes it impressive you fuckwit

>>9815876
I always wondered if this was dangerous, used to smoke a gravity bong all the time and we'd fashion a little bowl out of tin foil. Brb dyin

>>9817932
>tfw forgot to activate my almonds before elevating my eggs

>>9815265
You will never be able to afford to eat somewhere with this level of service, don't fret over it pleb

>>9817459
>>9816448
Faggot.

>>9818497
>Sherlock???
you must be more subtle, this is what gave you away

>>9818567
It has no head buttfucker

>>9815369
I'd prefer it with Kansas City bbq sauce but that looks fucking heavenly.

>>9816770
it's hominy

>>9814762
am Canadian, can confirm this is true

>>9816909
heartburn city.

>>9816655
holy shit

>>9816714
Man, he's handosome I would blow him but I wouldn't swallow it.

>>9817092
>white paint
>plaster paris
>chromium red pigment
>fake blood
>sweet potato chips
>rubber pellets

>>9817121
Stop baiting while your intelligence is not enough

>>9817345
Soyboy can't handle the meat
Pff

>>9818533
It's a safe for family show kind of, imagine a kid seeing that, I can imagine they're shocked.