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GIFs also welcome, bonus points for holiday related images.
>>9739322Why did he have to tap the knife 18 times?
>>9739175Now I know how jason biggs felt
>>9739328What is with these people and cream cheese?
>>9739175>huge pisshole>no actual vaginal openingwhy is a virgin carving pussy when they've never seen one up close?
>>9739339lack of testosterone in the body triggers an endorphin inside that attracts tastes like cheeses and fruits
>>9739339cream cheese wa tasty desu!
It's the season.
this kills the crabs, at high speed
>>9739339Numales are intrinsically drawn to white goo.
>>9739598>tfw was about to complain how everyone posts the same exact shit then this shows upholy shit how horrifying
>>9739594This shit always makes me feel queasy. I genuinely don't think I could stomach eating that.
>>9739598>This dismembers the crab
>>9739611What is most terrifying to me is that few seconds when we see the crab held upside down, the water dripping from his eye stalks, before he is opened wide in a split second.Makes me imagine being taken aboard a UFO and not knowing what is going on before before being eviscerated. What would be worse is to be on the conveyor belt behind a few other people and to see it happen, with no way of escaping.
>>9739396>deconstruct.webmwaited 55 seconds so that plate get blasted with eggs or something, and fucking nothing happened
>>9739849thats some fancy way to do drugs
>>9739378fuck me that guy is retarded
>>9739404Wtf is the point of this
>>9739858Holy shit that is a great idea.
>>9739945its for shredding cans/sheet metal
>>9739945I'm pretty sure it's and example of the sheer power of the mill. Retarded. Sad.
>>9739620You're giving the mental capacity of crabs too much credit.
>>9739396What is this even trying to say? Look I can take cheap shit and do the same things they do with high end cooking and ingredients? Well yeah, except it's still cheap shit. So?
>>9739175>Mike PenceI dont obsess over politicians personal lives and get frustrated about everything Trump related so I dont get the joke. Did Pence say he likes licking pussy or something? Who doesnt?>lol make vaginas into everything so itll be like, weird when your guests come over lol XDis this funny to anyone or...whats the point of this?
>>9739945He's making a hot dog reduction.
>>9739934Hey, he likes what he's doing. And the food seems good too.
>>9739322The salt literally lands on his wrist and not the meat.
>>9739849OMG so weird xD
>>9739999It's because he's such a prude, a quality I myself find endearing. He evidently won't dine alone with any woman not his wife, or go unaccompanied to any event that serves alcohol.
>>9739670i fucking love labeastthe fact that this man is still alive is a testament to the resilience of the human body
>>9739322>>9739378I want to see how his peers make fun of him.
>>9739934Less retarded than whoever carves vaginas in food. (OP's vid).
>>9740217seeing as how he's the chef, and has made his restaurant very successful, and just does these videos as a goof, it's fair to say they probably don't say much.
>>9739598FUCKING SLAVES GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE
>>9740130Guess these guys would prefer he harrass women like Biden it Clinton?
>>9739945post consumer recycled hot dogs
>>9739346>attracts tastes like cheeses and fruits
>>9740388Tasty brain, enjoy it with some wine.
>>9740415This is such a depressing picture and yet I am laughing.
>>9739594what the f!! is this a real thing? someone ever tried it? it looks so unhealthy and just generally disgusting.
>>9739598.. this kills the snab
>all this meat
>it's the same webms every time
>>9740888wasted trips>it's the same complaint everytime
>>9740871>unsweetened soy milkT. Soyboy
>>9740154The video where he eats a whole pineapple (with the skin) while having his balls covered with icy/hot is bloody hilarious
>>9741074The term soyboy is offensive to soyboys who suffer gender disphoria, kindly use soyperson in the future
>>9739620Watch Cloud Atlas some time. There's an entire scene dedicated to this.
>>9740154Yeah, we almost lost the Beast last year. He's cryptic about some parts of the incident but not others.Was in a car filming, looked tired/drunk/stoned. Then there were loud crunching noises. Apparently almost Dunn'd himself driving off the road. Was fucked way up and unconscious. EMTs managed to extract him before his fucking car burst into flames and burned completely out.
>>9739620The crabs aren't alive, you see them not moving even when they are on the conveyor
>>9739328>I was at the restaurant before he became famous>He used to do this shit because he was bored and wanted people to laugh at this type of pretentious nonsense in cooking>one day this shit comes up and everyone calls it artHe really rode the wave of stupid people
>>9741366>why bonerI know exactly why
>>9740871>this much effort to emulate a fucking eggVegans are insane
>>9741411Man coveted the sun, thus we tamed electricity to forge our own light.Jealous little cunts, just eat an egg already, jeez
>>9741490I want to live in that container
>>9739175Those kind of look like vaginas, kek.
>>9739328because he isn't autistic
>>9741779I have that pepper grinder.
>>9741779Does.... does that work?Does this make decent pasta?
>>9739328>18 timesI'd ask why you'd count them, but it seems pointless.
>>9741893Right... too good to be true things are usually too good to be true.
>>9741897It's not like it would even save you all that much effort. Pasta is brainless to boil, and you're going to want to get some color on your aromatics in a hot pan anyway. There's nothing worse than an onion that was introduced into warm water without having a chance to let Maillard do his thing.
>>9741913I know, I've gotten pretty efficient at making pasta with cherry tomatoes, onions, garlic, and some spinach leafs. If it wasn't for boiling of the pasta taking a bit I'd have it done in 15 minutes flat.I still have a soft spot in my heart for one-pot dishes since I don't have a dish washer and have to do all the dishes by hand.
>>9740132so this is yui claus' family
>>9741913sweating onion > browning
>>9742007pickled > raw > sweating > browning
>>9742134wrong.>>9742212stop conflating individual incompetents with massive groups that they happen to belong to.
>>9741366Dat butter drip at the end.
>>9742234just jackpost and label it as menscooking
>>9740130it's almost as though hes aware of his inherent flaws as a human and chooses to avoid knowingly putting himself in situations where he may be tempted to act in ways that he could regret laterwhat a fucking fascist asshole!
>>9742234>stop conflating individual incompetents with massive groups that they happen to belong to.This is the new internet bruv.I don't like it either but this is the result of all the fun we used to have.Memes symbolic, took it literal.
>>9741366>This kills the arteries
>>9742234>no your way is wrong!>goes on to say to make assumptions.... wow you're just a walking contradiction arent you.
>>9742281I don't even see what one has to do with the other.
>>9742290>all women are dumb>all forms of onion besides mine are wrongYou're dense.
>>9742639We have only just begun
>>9742299do you think generalizations are the same as opinions because the phrasing is similar? I don't get it
>>9741594self_inducted_abortion.webm>>9741712enough cheese pizza to put you away for life
>>9740217He's a millionaire with a chain of restaurants in places like dubai and new york. I don't think his peers laugh much at all.
>>9739598A-Are the crabs already dead?
>>9740132>when you introduce your 2d gf to your parents
>>9740871>all this fucking shit>when you could just have a regular eggsis this against vegans?
>>9742582Watching these is like watching a horror flick. I just know something terrible is about to happen, but I just don't know what and the magnitude of it.
>>9742802I will help ya, this is a jack appreciation thread now
>>9743362>jets his face out towards the food while simultaneously flailing his tonguei can't i hate him so much
>>9743365This. Dumb motherfucker doesn't know how to cook OR eat.
>>9739993>t. crustacean neuroscientist
>>9741531everytime i see that webm i think of that stream
>>9741490what is being made here?
>>9743763legit thought that was ethan
>>9739594The miracle of birth. Praise God.
>>9739328to keep in rhythm
>>9743814Ice-cream cakes I think
>>9741779>>9741890I fell for this meme when I was younger. It was awful. "One-pot" does not work with pasta.>gummy noodles>slimy starch "sauce">soggy yet crunchy onions>tomatoes with firm skin sliding around
>>9739598This machine is the dimension that the Event Horizon warped into. But you know. For crabs.
>>9739322This entire time I thought the salt image was of Robert Downey Jr.
>>9744064Why is that bacon throbbing?
>>9744096Her bacon doesn't throb
>>9744093you're not alone
>>9739718It still looks like shit too because there are no colors. I bet an angry amerilard made this video
>>9742582what's wrong with that? It's just slow poached eggs
>>9744089did jack and joey ever getting together to make something truly awful?
>>9739175I heard you like cheesy stuff
>>9741334based salt bae
>>9741779inb4 mods ban you for ja/ck/ posting. I got banned for three days for this shit.
>>9744038I think this webm made me ovulate just by watching.And I'm a man.
>>9739598>>9743113The crabs are already dead though. That's pretty clear
>>9744568>I'm a manLet's not go overboard here, numale.
>>9744426No peppers, onions, or mushrooms? That meatball sub is unworthy of the bone zone.
>>9744064The way they utilize bold lettering makes me uncomfortable the same way sonic mpreg makes me uncomfortable. Extreme autism
>>9743362that tongue is disgusting but i'll be damned if that pizza doesn't look good
>>9744614The best part about that video is picturing him sticking that tongue in his wife's gooey stink wrinkle.
>>9739598For me it's crab legs
>>9741696So, is Jack really this much of a retard, or is it mostly an act for his channel? I honestly can't tell. I always laugh, and wince, at the webms posted ... and I truly want to believe he is this stupid because that makes it great.
>>9744103came at .37
>>9744426Modern camera editing cannot save how shit every part of that was.
>>9744043that cheddar is sharper then the fucking knife
>>9739328noone cared who he was before he started tapping the knife
>>9743233Man, I am really thinking about buying a body pillow. Non-anime though. For now...
>>9740130>He evidently won't dine alone with any woman not his wife, or go unaccompanied to any event that serves alcohol.>>9742271>it's almost as though hes aware of his inherent flaws as a humanFrankly, those behaviours sound more like somebody who's a recovering alcoholic and sex addict. Most people don't have to avoid being tempted to do something they'll regret, because they can still just not do it. Completely avoiding a situation in which temptation might occur is literally the primary defense mechanism social drug addicts are advised to adopt.
>>9745194>dug addictsOr the very religious. You're raised from birth to believe the dangers of temptation, it's an ingrained behavior that is very hard to change. But at the end of the day who cares? He's living a moral life the way he sees fit so good on him.
>>9739945It's what will happen if you don't stop playing with yourself.
>>9740132I love how the other two are involed with the joke.They are involed, right?
>>9739328>Fill it with cheese>Still dryheh
>>9741779Is he using an electric pepper grinder?Modernity was a mistake, I want to go back
>>9742252Anime is fucking awful
>>9745530You must eat all the eggs.
>>9745535Did he die?
>>9745514If you only ever do a light sprinkle of black pepper on your food then I can see that being unnecessary. But there are times where I've made dishes with lots of black pepper and thought about getting an electric grinder. There's nothing wrong with technology making things faster and easier. I'm sure you enjoy just being able to turn a knob and get a hot oven instead of having to start a fire and then testing it to make sure it's the right temperature every time.
>>9741890Yes and no.Finishing pasta in the sauce, as well as adding a little pasta water to your sauce (boil your pasta in as little water as possible) both are greatbut you should actually make the sauce separately before you do it
>>9744057There is a way to make it work but it isn't fucking this>sticking large pasta in a room temperature pot full of waterYou have to use a smaller pasta and treat it like rice
>>9739175>full sleeve tattoos>virgin's interpretation of roasties
>>9739680Beat you to it buddy.>>9745680
>>9741334Oh, if he was just pretending to be retarded then its okay
>>9739598>there will eventually be a generation of people who really don't know where meat comes from because nobody actually handles the animalsworld war 3 when
>>9745709>there will eventually be a generation of people who really don't know where meat comes from because we'll have cultured lab-grown meatwe'll probably have zoos or farms for people to visit and learn that we used to kill animals for their meat and we'll look back on doing that as pretty brutal and be glad that we don't have to kill for food anymore and then we'll start treating each other better and play games in virtual reality and stuff
>>9742234>>9742212I prefer "finger removal tutorial.webm"
>>9743113>>9744576Looks like a demonstration. Something like that could go on a ship so they could prepare and package crabs right when they're caught.
>>9745162What other kind is there...
>>9744043>cutting through the packaging>the same packaging that's been handled by countless people and run across 100s of miles and sat around for who knows how long at the store
>>9745713its not like even if labgrown meat becomes popular meat from animals will be outlawed, it will just become the next gmo/soy/whatever else scare. we are heading toward rapture farms tier dystopia
>>9745740Regular dakimakura, not love dakimakura.
>>9744043JUST OPEN THE FUCKING PACKAGING AND TAKE THE CHEESE OUT BEFORE YOU CUT IT, IS THAT SO HARD
>>9744043Why is he not putting it upright? It would be so much easier to cut.
>>9739175why does that turkey have a pussy cut into it? it looks fucking disgusting.
>>9745246yeah, that looks like a pretty fuckin comfy family... im jealous
>>9745408i know it's a classic southern dish, but.... is this guy retarded?
>>9739598What have we become...
>>9746136What's it called? It looks absolutely disgusting.
>>9745539No, but he started growing feathers.
>>9744497I do it all the time and never get banned, you must be doing something else
>>9744426>don't forget the valuable greasey bag shot
>>9744497If you don't know how to evade a 4chan ban you shouldn't be posting here.
>>9746325how do u do it
>>9746166Lol, nice one mate.
>>9745723>Cutting out the black man
>>9739849Wait, how the fuck the drips turn into square from circles? Is this meme magic?
>>9746702He didn't want to trigger the entire site.
>there are """people""" who will defend the consumption of dangerous raw meat
>>9746735Those are jack-tier fork skills
>>9746152https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qf_W7As6xbk>>9746166There are people in the cancer thread who will believe this.>>9746735What the fuck did they do to that yolk? Is it some kind of vegan fake?
>200+ replies>No surly king of the egg fort
>>9743814VIENETTA my friendThe ice cream cake of royalty
>>9744426>burning the sauce like thatJesus
Need some ideas for what to make with turkey leftovers
>>9746750>What the fuck did they do to that yolk? Is it some kind of vegan fake?It might've dried out a bit, it normally has a thin outer layer but it shouldn't be that tough
>>9744686It's both, which is what makes it confusing. He's legitimately a bad person in some ways and has absolutely no idea what he's talking about with most subjects, but instead of trying to learn he embraces it and plays it up at the same time.
>>9739598>>9741296what kind of idiot would kill their crabs prior to putting them through processing if they don't have to? shellfish goes bad FAST. and they aren't the same thing as a large farm animal.these guys are probably just very cold. ectothermic animals tend to move slower, and act more docile when they're cold because that's all their metabolism can handle at low temperatures.
>>9744057couldn't you just put ingredients in at different times based on whatever needs more/less time or liquid? what if you used fresh pasta instead of dry?
>>9745713The is a joke right? Because that's some nice fantasy you have there.
>>9747288You don't know what an A10 is?
>>9746149What's wrong with quicker deaths?
>>9746836>TFW people got so angry, Jack had to remake the dishBrits don't like when you fuck around with Yorkshire pudding.
>>9746758Oh no, heaven forbid we post at least somewhat original material. No, let's go back to Surly King and then 249 fucking Jack pics you worthless anime poster.
>>9739620glad you noticed that
>>9739849been there, its worth the $300+ tip
>>9745740N-nothing weird or anything.
>>9739328it was 7 times bitch
>>9747798>he couldn't perceive the other 11 hyper-taps
>>9743362How can this fucking butterball be so bad at eating? Even worse, I've never seen him do a single thing that I'd want to emulate.
>>9746325teach me your ways senpai
>>9745420Damn she is one hungry bitch
So is Jack doing all this shit ironically or is he being completely serious? And if he's serious, how does he take it being told that he sucks because I suppose people should bash him hard for being shit.
>>9745420Think about that big sloppy oily poop that's gonna poke out of her powdered little balloon knot after consuming all those steaks (I'm imagining it being powdered *sniggers*)Mouth is watering Imagining the whole thing sliding into my gaping lips, the undigested oils dripping off and down my face. The first bite, oh that first bite would be amazing. I can Just imagine it being packed as tight as a Vienna sausage but bigger, stickier, and most definitely stinkier!
>>9747840he deletes the comments
>>9747842Cool pasta fagmaster
>>9747840Yeah he just deletes comments/doesn't allow ratings now. But he used to not do that and sometimes would reply to trolls. It was always a lame reply but at least you know it got to him.
>>9747870>>9747875>>9747876No one cares.
>>9746254also great in reverse
>>9747877clearly at least one person does you dip
>>9739396Im sad jackes de la merde just revealed herself as a bored line cook chick, got his 15 minutes of fame in social media and stopped doing this
>>9739339They love garlic and spring onion too
>>9739598this is like quake 4 if the marines were crabs
>>9741696>>9744686He actually lives less than a half an hour away from me. He is retarded.
>>9746749>inb4 mods ban you for ja/ck/ posting.I get irrationally triggered by people who attempt to make "food porn" and cut yolks/lava cakes with terrible fork/knife skills.
>>9746757wait, how did he cut the hand holding the knife?
>>9744089Wow fake eggs
>>9748150thats nice, dear.
>>9748209was that olive oil at the end?jesus...
>>9747829USE THE TONGS YOU FUCK
>>9747876This explains a lot.
>>9739849First food presentation I'd call genuine art.
>>9748228>was that olive oil at the end?yes
>>9748369>>9748349fucking thumbnails, any idea why this is happening? My first few webms converted nicely.
>>9748301He doesn't actually have Down's he just acts like it
>>9745734you dont want to do that, lose freshness and half the time they're on huge fucking waves going up/down... it's way easier to just put them alive in water below deck until you get back to port
>>9746735>there are """people""" who will defend living in 3rd world countries with no food safety lawscant even get salmonella from the chickens growns in my country
>>9748163pushed his thumb on the edge nearest the grip like a dumb fuck cus he isnt holding the knife properly
>>9748440>>9748444Whats the point in reposting these again and again? Is it because you made them and you want people to appreciate the effort it took? There cant be a single person who hasn't seen them, just make new ones for fuck sake.
>>9748449Cry harder faggot
>>9748448How is he so bad at all of these kitchen convenience gadgets?
>>9748460he's too retarded to cut a flat bottom on the potato to stand oni bet he would buy a fucking appliance to solve that instead of just slicing it once
>>9748460He forms opinions before he tries something and if he thinks it's dumb he tries his hardest to make it look dumb. He's a brainlet.
>>9748469He also fucks up expensive things, too.
>>9748323Is it? What deeper feeling of the artist does this contain? The little part of himself, the spark of his inspiration that should inhabit any worthwhile art. To me, this webm always looks like some well-trained servers organizing food in a vaguely funky-abstract artsy pattern. It just looks interesting. But there is no deeper meaning behind this. This is a nice novelty, but noone will look at that for a few minutes and afterwards feel a definite change in his own self. And I very much know, that the exact definition of what art is, is a topic of much debate. But, personally I think at least a tiny spark of inspiration should be in it to be considered truly artful in contrast to skillful.
>>9748478>To me, this webm always looks like some well-trained servers organizing food in a vaguely funky-abstract artsy patternthis
>>9745535This guy's gonna make it
>>9748478The pattern is pre-arranged, you can see the white liquid taking on the square shapes of the template underneath
>>9747859Does he have an irrational fear of heat or something?Every webm where I see him using direct heat he always has it on low, even when trying to "sear" something.
>>9748508that's a lot of grease
>>9748518could also be liquid from the meat sauce, doesnt have to be grease.
>>9748508Matty is the best.
>>9748652he seems like a genuine guy
>>9748694Fug. Those are some perfect looking classic cheeseburgers. How did I miss that episode
>>9748402this makes me feel weird
>>9748453at least the oil is hot
>>9748530watch the video, he uses a LOT of oil
>>9748736idk because it went viral and basically launched his career with Vice
currently making webms guys, give me video suggestions
>>9748694Agreed. Kind of a mans man but with heart. A humble guy as well.
>>9748797comfy videos from Gordon and Jamie
>>9745747ThisIt is really disgusting, you need to wash the package first
that's all for now, I'll make some more for the next thread
>>9748900Just got done watching a bunch of Cooking With Hoarders videos a bit ago. Classics.
>>9748983You are a true gentleman anon
>>9748397I'm not sure who was more wrong; the guy holding it at the wrong angle or the cheese guy for not telling him.
>>9748428Only in America.
>>9748440>"that'll be $50 sir"
>>9748454>zero knife tapsClearly an amateur.
>>9749199You're not wrong.Weird combos or reinventions are fucking king here.
>>9748267>using tongs at allYou don't turn salmon, you let it cook on the skin side
>>9747859>dollar steakI don't care how much you hate well done steaks, you do NOT eat that shit anywhere close to rare.
>>9746152Aunt Myrna Party Cheese Salad
>>9741490>>9739598Seeing this kind of stuff makes me angry. Why was the fruit not shared with everyone?
>>9750347What in the jesus fuck is going on here?
>>9750347are those baby eels?
>>9750347what the fuck
>>9748209Never seen that kind of hotdog here. We usually use corn, a tomato salad with vinaigrette, ketchup, mustard, mayo (on the buns) and pommes pailles.
>>9747056Eh, it's just nerves aimlessly firing at that point, there's zero actual life left in the fish. That being said, that's pretty fucking cool.
>>9748530It's definitely grease my man.