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/ck/ - Food & Cooking


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9468499 No.9468499 [Reply] [Original]

ITT your achilles tendon

dishes you tried to make many times but ultimately failed to do so

>> No.9469094

Crème caramel

always tastes too eggy

>> No.9469109

>>9468499
Huh. I've never seen one of those with peppers in it.

>> No.9469119

My grandmother would make an excellent apple pie, but she passed away.

>> No.9469134

chili verde from scratch

>> No.9469135

eggs

>> No.9469167

Pop Tarts

>> No.9469171

>>9469135
in a similar boat, i've never been great at poaching eggs

>> No.9469529

>>9469109
Those are green olives.

>> No.9469535
File: 39 KB, 600x450, kladdkaka-2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9469535

flourless chocolate cake with this consistency

>> No.9469560

Black bean burgers.

They always come out dry and crumbly.

>> No.9471365

>>9469535
Mud cake? (Kladdkaka)

>> No.9471423

Somehow i always manage to fuck up rice.

>> No.9471426
File: 27 KB, 268x268, CVR_SFS_chocolate_raspberry_torte_006-1_article.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9471426

>>9469535

That torte is raw...

It should have this texture.

>> No.9471452
File: 11 KB, 300x225, IMG_1333_convert_20110608021022.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9471452

let's make this thread about actual achilles tendon dishes, i bought a package saturday to make oden now that it's fall and promptly got a string of 35° days.

if i'm going to make radioyaki, how long should i cook them? should i try the parboil, vacuum-pack, then cook submerged in rice cooker method?

>> No.9471476

Falafel

>> No.9471497

>>9469529
Another thing I've never seen in a Spanish omelette. The ones I've had only had potatoes, onions, and eggs.

>> No.9471512

>>9469094
Put the ramekins in deep tray and fill it with boiling water after you put in in the oven, enough that the ramekins are almost fully covered and that's how you get perfect non eggy creme.

>> No.9471517

>>9469135
This. I try and try and try to make eggs but I always just end up shitting.

>> No.9471518

>>9471476
Of you're not brown it ain't gonna happen, falafel is 90% genetic.

>> No.9471519

Cottage Pie. I can never get my seasonings right.

>> No.9471564

I'm terrible at making roasts

I did a pork shoulder roast rubbed with paprika and other spices at 450 for 20 minutes and then reduced to 325 until my probe thermometer read 185 (like an hour and a bit) and it came out tough as leather

Maybe I should have covered it to keep the moisture in? The recipe I used omitted that detail

>> No.9471744

>>9469134
super easy if you have a blender and a pressure cooker

not sure how it stacks up to "real" authentic green chili tho, but it still tastes really good.

http://www.seriouseats.com/recipes/2015/04/pressure-cooker-fast-and-easy-chicken-chile-verde-recipe.html

>> No.9471790

>>9471452
Just make tendies.

>> No.9471796

>>9471426
That's because it's not a torte. It's a Kladdkaka

>> No.9471797

>>9471517
Underrated/10

>> No.9471809
File: 47 KB, 600x400, Hiroshimayaki-600x400.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9471809

I've been trying to master Hiroshima style okonomiyaki, but I can't get it anywhere near the level of the place I used to go when I lived there. Unlike the more popular Osaka style, where everything is mixed together and then fried like a pancake, the ingredients are layered and there are fried noodles and a fried egg on it. It's so damn good.

>> No.9471841

>>9471423
I feel ya man. At the very least if I cook the rice right, there is always a good amount burnt to the pan.

>> No.9471895

Any kind of pleated dumpling, I'm just too cack handed.

>> No.9471930

Cocktails in general. I have this beautifully-furnished bar, a lineup of 500ml bottles of home-extracted schnapps that would cause significantly more than 500ml of juices in the panties of an etsy-ite if I ever decided to try in life rather than rely on pornhub and "massages"

i get home, chug 750ml of a 2l bottle of coke zero, dump a bottle of braveheart in to fill, and nurse that for a day or two. if i run out and i'm too drunk to find my car keys, the schnapps get tapped and shot in descending order of alcohol content, even if that means going from the 45% abv coffee straight to the 40% lavender (and i suppose the 35% oak is just as conflicting but by that point i can't feel my tongue anyway)

>> No.9471944

>>9471930
blackheart whatever the $10 95-proof one

>> No.9472003

>>9469135
Eggs are an ingredient, not a dish.

>> No.9472110

>>9471564
Well, yeah once it reaches 185 you have to keep cooking it for a few hours. 3-4 hours total cook time is normal.

>> No.9472136
File: 19 KB, 495x362, 1501865175493.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9472136

>>9468499
caramelized onions

>> No.9472146

Fried squid. Always comes up tough like rubber.

>> No.9472150

>>9472136
This. I never can seem to find the sweet spot between clear cooked onions and burnt onions. I try going low and slow, wait about 45 minutes, onions aren't caramelized so I crank up the heat a little, and then they start to burn.

>> No.9472156

attempted beef wellington once but i used the wrong kind of pastry recipe for it. the meat tasted superb but the pastry was fucked.

tried fettucine pasta from scratch a couple of times. i get the dough correct but i can't quite get it thin enough with a rolling stick. if i had a passing machine i could.

>> No.9472160

>>9472136
VERY low heat
Cut your onions in half then into pieces lengthwise, so you have slivers
Olive oil in the pan, not butter
Throw in the onions and turn to coat
Cook stirring CONSTANTLY. The key is patience, should take about 30 minutes

>> No.9472171

>>9471564
Yes, pork shoulder should be covered for most of the cooking time, you can uncover to try to get a bit of bark on it in the stage of cooking. I have never had a pork shoulder in the oven for less than 5 hours either.

>> No.9472339

french baguette

i use exact same ingredients and process every time and get completely different results every time

>> No.9472371 [DELETED] 
File: 980 KB, 305x320, 1506069508734.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9472371

Roast Chicken

How do you get it so tender you that teeth are optional? I buy small high quality roasting chickens, brine them in saltwater for a few hours, and every time they come out good, but it's not fall off the bone. How do you get it tender (sort of like boston market)?

>> No.9472383
File: 590 KB, 900x600, Chicken-roasted-with-potatoes-and-carrots.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9472383

Roast Chicken

How do you get it so tender you that teeth are optional? I buy small high quality roasting chickens, brine them in saltwater for a few hours, and every time they come out with great flavor, but it's not fall off the bone. I use a thermometer and pull it when the thigh hits 160. What am I doing wrong?

>> No.9472390

>>9472371
>>9472383
Either low heat or parboil before roasting.

>> No.9472535

>>9472150
>so I crank up the heat a little
Well, I found your problem. Good caramelized onions can take hours.

>> No.9472575
File: 123 KB, 1500x1125, 20150328-bearnaise-sauce-easy-18-thumb-1500xauto-421588.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9472575

>>9468499

bearnaise sauce

I don't fail every time tho, it's probably around 50/50

Problem is I try to make it when we're having a dinner party and there's usually 6+ people

is it just not possible to make bearnaise for a large crowd? I made it the other day and shit actually split at one point but I managed to save it

the sauce is god tier tho so I'll continue my endeavour

>>9472383

have you tried brining your chicken and slow cooking it? When you're about to eat crank up the heat to crisp up the skin and let just it rest for a bit

>> No.9472592

>>9471518
southern white guy reporting in. It's pretty easy really.

>>9471476
what trouble are you having specifically?

>> No.9472624

>>9472592
You've only tricked yourself into thinking you know, real falafel is genetic, it has to be made by an old, brown fat guy

>> No.9472642

>>9472136
>>9472150
I've actually come across a great work around for this. Put onions with a little salt and olive oil in a dutch oven and sit in a 400F oven with lid on. Check every 30 minutes or so to stir a little. I've let it go almost an hour without checking and it hadn't burnt. I'll take 5 big onions and shrink them down to a little over a cup. Takes about 3 hours.

>> No.9472644

>>9468499
Orange flan
Like half of it always comes out delicious and perfect, then the other half is always just goo
I even bought a special pan to make it in after a the retro technique didn't work, still didn't help

>> No.9472646

Hash browns, I can never manage to make them like they do in restaurants; evenly cooked, crispy but not "flat" or dry and with decent thickness

>> No.9472656

>>9472624
afraid I'm stealing your culture Achmed?

>> No.9472693

>>9472656
I ain't no sand nigger, just making my observations.

>> No.9472719

>>9471809
I have never been able to make okonomiyaki, but I have also never actually had an authentic one because it's impossible to find in my flyover hellhole

>> No.9472774

Nice, crispy chicken in a kung pao (americanized) stir-fry. All the flavor is there, but while the chicken is moist, it lacks that sharp sauce-infused crust. I'm 99% sure this is due to lack of heat in the wok. I'm just using an open range stovetop, which lacks the heat for proper sichuan stir-fry.

When I buy a proper wok burner I will report back, but even through the flavor is outstanding, I can't seem to get that light crispy coating on the chicken like the hole-in-the-wall shops in Chengdu did for their chicken dishes.

>> No.9472906

>>9472624
I've noticed this, too.
Even old brown guys who are skinny fuck it up somehow.

What secrets does the fat hold?

>> No.9472913

Been chasing after the white whale of decent batter-based corn tortillas for a while now. I tend to just end up with shitty crumbly cornbread that I can't even flip without it disintegrating.
Saw a recipe the other day that uses buckwheat flour that I'll probably try. Need to buy more Masa tho

>> No.9472928

>>9472774
You could be using too much sauce

>> No.9472975

>>9468499
i can't make hashbrowns to save my life. i shred the potatoes, soak them, dry them, and then fry them but they always come out too oily and not cooked all the way through, if I cook them long enough they burn and if I lower the heat they're not crispy. i just can't make hashbrowns.

>> No.9473050

>>9472975
Try cast iron, thin layers, and salting the hash before cooking to let that draw more moisture out

>> No.9473073

im a decent cook but i honestly always fuck up pancakes

>> No.9473130

>>9472928
Fair analysis. But I refuse to add sauce until the chicken is cooked. There is just some magical means to ensure the chicken cuts are crispy, and I'm guessing that "magic" is 400F oil temp.

>> No.9473143

>>9473050
Yeah, I'm not that anon. But sweating your tater matchsticks and draining prior to the fry might make that salting worth while.

>> No.9473152

Muffins

They always come out too dense, or there's too much of a flour taste. I can't do it

>> No.9473263

>>9472383
Butterfly your chicken, get a roasting bag, and roast it at 220C for ~35-40 minutes.

In the meantime, parboil some celery, and potato, fry it for about ~5 minutes with some shallot, and then put it in the roasting tray with the chicken.

When the 40 minutes elapses, cut open the chicken bag and remove it, letting all the juices flow onto the veges, and put it back in at 180 for the next 15-20 minutes.

You'll get better results with a brined chicken.

>> No.9473291

>>9471564
>cooking pork shoulder for only an hour and 20 minutes
What did you expect, you fucking idiot?

>> No.9473309

key lime pie/lemon pie. they just never set

>> No.9473321

can never get the meat/lettuce/mayo ratio right in my mcchickens

>> No.9473324

>>9472693
so you gave up on getting better. nice to know

>> No.9473959

>>9472774

if you really wanna experiement you can use a chimney starter and put the wok on top of that

>> No.9473974

>>9473959
But that's even more effort than picking up a couple extra shifts at work and buying a proper wok burner.

>> No.9474001

>>9472156
Re: hand rolling pasta:

Heavily flour the sheet of rolled pasta and fold it on itself and roll again. Unfold it and roll the crease out. Repeat rolling layers of 2, 4, 8, even 16 as necessary. Just flour a lot and unfold, remove crease each time so your dough doesn't get all tenty.

>> No.9474004

chillies and tendons is my achilles tendon dish. never get the amount of chillies right and I always undercook the tendons.

>> No.9474006

>>9468499

What's so difficult about a spanish tortilla? I made it for the first time last week and it turned out fine without too many issues. Is your egg/potato ratio off? Not enough oil? Trying to flip instead of using the oven?

>> No.9474032

Fried rice.

>> No.9474037

>>9474006
>spanish tortilla
its called a spanish omelette

>> No.9474053

>>9474037
Looks like a tortilla to me, unless you refuse to call a tortilla with ingredients other than eggs, potatoes and onions a tortilla. I guess that makes sense, considering we're on the melt chicken board.

>> No.9474073

>>9472575
What happens with your sauce? It starts to split?
If so, then you either haven't whisked enough, or you gave it too much heat, too fast.
Just add a few spoons of cold water while whisking like a madman and you'll be able to save in a minute or so.
I can whisk up a sauce from scratch in 20 minutes now in a single pot.

>> No.9474085

>>9472575
>>9474073
Oh, and take the pot off the heat while you whisk after it has split, obviously.

>> No.9474095

>>9472575
And I forgot to ask just how much butter do you use?
The most I've made sauce for in one batch is eight people, and that was about 500g. No problems there.

>> No.9474118

>>9468499
Can't make pancakes or fried eggs.

I can do a fair amount of "advanced" dishes but I always fuck these up. Though it's possible it's because my pans are shit.

>> No.9474121

Poached eggs. They can go fuck themselves. I'm using a mould exclusively now.

>> No.9474127

>>9471497
A spanish omelette only has those three ingredients except for extra virgin olive oil and a touch of good salt. If it has other ingredients I don't think it can be called a spanish omelette.

>> No.9474136
File: 13 KB, 320x323, 98d9c6a26a570206a3de96da8b71e72e675974491fbf65ad22961088faffb9f2_1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9474136

>>9472003

>> No.9474137

>>9472156
you can get a machine real cheap and you will not regret it

>> No.9474142

>>9468499
Try it this way :)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JceGMNG7rpU

>> No.9474215

I can't for the fucking life of me make a decent mac'n'cheese

>> No.9474224

>>9474215

Just follow the instructions on the box

>> No.9474328

Anything breaded and deep fried. I never get a good coat.

>> No.9474405

>>9472150
are you ready? here is how you do this

julienne onions .25 in, into an almost dry pan, just a scant amount of oil. basically none. blast the heat all the way.
stir constantly, when the onions start to brown on the bottom of the pan, like a fond, add a splash of water, stirring to deglaze completely and coat the onions in the liquid.
repeat. til you're satisfied with the color they've taken on.
IMPORTANT do not season with salt til the end, otherwise the salt will pull out the moisture and the pan will be a mess and you will make sad soubise

>> No.9474422

Mayonaise
;_;

>> No.9474441

>>9474037
maybe in bongistan but in spain its a tortilla de patata

>> No.9474451

>>9471809
I probably have to say okonomiyaki as well.

>> No.9474707

>>9474422
how the fuck do you fuck up putting 4-5 ingredients in a bowl and then mixing them together?

>> No.9474771

>>9474707
it can split you know

>> No.9474814
File: 26 KB, 406x305, 1382539329904.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9474814

>>9468499
Southern Peach Cobbler.

This "batter at the bottom" shit is beyond me.

>> No.9474817

>>9474814
Best cobbler crust is the simplest one. One cup sugar one cup flour one egg.

>> No.9474827

>>9474127
I've seen mild peppers and dry chorizo in spain, it's usually along side a plain one

>> No.9476749

Bump

>> No.9476787
File: 5 KB, 249x202, the_mcchicken.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9476787

>>9468499
For me it's the McChicken. The best fast food sandwich.

>> No.9476920

>>9468499
Mussels, oysters
They're just too much of a pain in the ass to clean and prepare and I get impatient. Also they always seem to cook inconsistantly.

>> No.9477094

Any kind of braised meat. I can boil meat, I can roast meat, I can fry meat but for some reason even a simple slow-cooker method ends up with stringy, tough, unappealing slop.

>> No.9477134

>>9474215
The key is to use a quality cheese
Also broil it at the end just a bit

>> No.9477148

I don't think I have failed to make anything in more than 3 attempts.

>> No.9477639

>>9477148
how many times did you try to make your parents proud

>> No.9477648

>>9471365
Denna negern vet vad som är upp.

>> No.9477650

I'm shit at deep frying. Getting a thermometer would probably help.

>> No.9477835
File: 92 KB, 600x600, ns1PlJv.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9477835

Grilled fucking cheese.
I can't get it to not be full of lard, even with little butter and thin bread. And to add salt to injury, it's always raw, I want strands of comfy cheese.

>> No.9477843

>>9477094
Mom always used a pressure cooker. Might be worthwhile.

>> No.9477866

>>9477835
Shred your cheese

>> No.9477877

>>9477866
Thanks anon, butter all sides too? Or only the outsides?

>> No.9477886

it's actually Achilles heel not tendon

>> No.9478001

>>9473073
What goes wrong for you? I've come to make a pretty decent pancake in my time, so maybe I can help.

>> No.9478020

A perfect clarified broth or stock, esp in chicken noodle soup. Always ends up fatty or with too many floating bits/pieces

>> No.9478025

>>9472646
Yeah hash browns never come out like they do at restaurants. I wonder if they have some kinda fake potato product

>> No.9478038

>>9478025
I suspect the trick you might be missing is that you need to press out the water from the potatoes before cooking them. After you grate your potatoes stick them in a kitchen towel and twist it hard. Or stick the potatoes in a ricer. Either way, squeeze out the extra water before you start cooking.

>> No.9478041
File: 48 KB, 425x640, zabaione.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9478041

I can't make this to save my life. Frustrating as hell.

>> No.9478057

>>9472136
>slice up onion
>make container with tinfoil
>put sliced onions in container
>add a tbsp or two of butter
>close container with itself
>poke holes in container
> put on closed grill on med low heat
>stir around every 10-20 minutes to avoid burning on bottom
> take off when satisfied (45min-1hr30)

Its the easiest thing to make anon. Really. The longer you have it on the grill, the more caramelized they will be.

>> No.9478069

>>9473309
Im gonna brag here but i made both and aside from using a bit too much lime, they were pretty much perfect first try. Maybe a little runny on the bottom, but only a little.

>> No.9479225

>>9472774
post recipe pls

>> No.9479249

>>9468499
I can't make the following:

Sushi
Pizza
Fried Chicken
Crepes
Bread
Curries

>> No.9479923

>>9477134
Panko soaked in butter for the topping is key

>> No.9480353

I don't know what is wrong with me, but I can't make pudding.
Not even with store bought mix.

>> No.9480667

>>9477835
I always cheat and melt the cheese under a broiler then throw it in a hot buttered pan until the bread is browned.

>> No.9480732

fish & chips & angry orchard

>> No.9480776

>>9477094
Use fatty cuts, fat on top to self-baste. Always use low heat, lid on, braising liquid should come about halfway up the meat. If you see more than a couple bubbles every 5 seconds, you're too hot.

>> No.9481883

>>9468499
French toast.