/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.9422757]

Would you eat Eskimo food /ck/?

[Anonymous No.9422764]

>>9422757
Yeah. Why not? When in Rome ya know?

[Anonymous No.9422766]

>>9422757
If Eskimos are serving me their food then I'm eating it, otherwise I don't think I'd go out of my way for Eskimo food.

[Anonymous No.9422769]

Those are siberians

[Anonymous No.9422792]

>>9422769
Still eskimos

[Anonymous No.9422861]

Pretty sure those are Siberians from Komi Republic

[Anonymous No.9422945]

>>9422757
An Eskimo is out for a drive one day when his car breaks down and he is forced to call out the Alaskan AA. The Eskimo stands in the howling wind and waits for the mechanic to arrive. When the mechanic reaches the broken car, he sets to work, looking under the bonnet until he appears to have located the problem. He looks up at the Eskimo and says, "You've blown a seal, mate." To which the Eskimo hastily replies, "No, I haven't. That's just frost on my moustache."

[Anonymous No.9422953]

What Do You Call A Gay Eskimo Woman?
A Klondike.

[Anonymous No.9422966]

There were three Eskimos in Alaska, and one time while they
were at their local bar, they got to talking about how cold it
was outside, and how cold their igloos were. They could agree
on everything but whose igloo was the coldest, so they decided
to determine who indeed had the coldest igloo.
They went to the first Eskimo's igloo, where he said "Watch
this!" and poured a cup of water into the air. Well, the water
froze in mid-air and fell onto the floor solid.
"Not bad", said the other Eskimos, but each maintained their
igloo was colder still.
So they went to the second Eskimo's igloo, and he said "Watch
this!" and took a big breath and exhaled, whereupon his breath
froze into a big lump and fell to the floor.
"Wow, that's colder than mine!" said the first Eskimo.
But the third Eskimo exclaimed his was colder still. So they
ended up at the third Eskimo's igloo.
He said "Watch this!" and went into the bedroom, threw back
the thick furs, and retrieved one of several small balls of ice
there. He took it, put it in a spoon, and held a match under it.
When it heated up enough, it went "FFFAAAARRRRTTT".

[Anonymous No.9422971]

Hear about the Eskimo girl who spent the night with her boyfriend
and next morning found she was six months pregnant.

[Anonymous No.9422977]

How is an Eskimo like a plastic surgeon?
They're both really great with nose jobs.

[Anonymous No.9423007]

If I want to bang an Eskimo...

[Anonymous No.9423049]

>>9422953
Nice

[Anonymous No.9423079]

>>9423007
I asked one once but she wasn't Inuit.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5jxpNhqLomc

[Anonymous No.9423080]

>>9423007
>>9422977
>>9422971
>>9422966
>>9422953
>>9422945
shut the fuck up these jokes are terrible

[Anonymous No.9423084]

what the fuck

I want to watch a documentary on Eskimos now

[Anonymous No.9423088]

>>9423007
Snow trouble really.

[Anonymous No.9423104]

>>9423080
What do Eskimos buy at Christmas time?
Christmas seals.

[Anonymous No.9423108]

>>9423080
Fuck off. They are hilarious. Plus he's posting some good pics

[Anonymous No.9423110]

>>9423080
Do you know what an Eskimo gets when he sits in his igloo for too long?
Polaroids...

[Anonymous No.9423118]

>>9423007
Yukon ask her sister.


>>9423108
(you)

[Anonymous No.9423119]

Lol, amerilards or canacucks ridicule Inuits when not 1/100 could physically have competed with them before they adopted the shit cumskin culture. Their women alone would have btfo your weak scrawny cumskin ass.

[Anonymous No.9423129]

Where is that girl from?

Alaska.

Don't bother I'll ask her myself.

[Anonymous No.9423155]

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Eskimo.
Eskimo who?
Eskimo questions. I'll tell you no lies


The Interior of Alaskan Life 2: Preparing Thanksgiving Moose Ribs
https://exploredreamdiscovertours.wordpress.com/2012/11/22/visit-alaska-thanksgiving-moose/

[Anonymous No.9423168]

A man wants to be an Eskimo...
He meets with the chief and asks him what it would take to become an Eskimo. The chief, wary of letting a white man into his clan, devises a series of impossible challenges. He says, "If you truly want to become part of our Eskimo family, you must do three things: 1) You must drink one gallon of 151 rum, and if you can handle it and maintain all of your faculties, we will know your body and spirit are in harmony. 2) You must climb up the tall mountain and kill the polar bear that resides in the cave at the summit. 3) To show your true love for our race, you must make love to an Eskimo woman of my choosing."

The man thinks for a while, and agrees to complete the challenges. He first drinks the gallon of 151 and it was like nothing ever happened to him. He can talk, walk, and think logically. Next, he ascends the mountain and is not seen for a few hours after entering the cave. The chief breathes a sigh of relief, because he is sure the polar bear killed him, but gets the shock of his life when he sees the man descending the mountain. He is in tatters. His clothes are ripped, he is breathing heavily and sweating profusely, and his hair is pointing in every direction. He approaches the chief, ready for the third challenge and asks, "Alright, now who is this woman you want me to kill?"

>yes I'm stealing most of these

[Anonymous No.9423178]

What do you call an Eskimo who's a Peeping Tom?
Itookalook

[Anonymous No.9423193]

Two Eskimos, sitting in a kayak, were very chilly.
To keep warm, they lit a fire in the craft, but it sank.
They should have known.
You can't have your kayak and heat it too.

[Anonymous No.9423225]

Two Eskimos, a big one and a little one, go to their local Alaskan convent with a question. The big one nudges the little one and says, "Go ahead, knock on the door, knock on the door."
The Mother Superior answers the door. Again, the big Eskimo nudges the little one and says, "Go ahead, ask her the question, ask her the question."The little Eskimo timidly says, "May we speak with the midget nun that lives here please?"The Mother Superior answers, "There are no midget nuns living here."
The big Eskimo starts nudging the little one again and says, "Go ahead, ask her the other question, ask her the other question."The little Eskimo asks in a quavering voice, "Well. Are there any midget nuns in Alaska?"
The Mother Superior responds uncertainly, "Why no, I don't believe so."

With this the big Eskimo falls down and rolls on the ground, clutching his belly as he laughs uncontrollably. "See", he says to the little Eskimo, "I told you you f**ked a penguin!"

[Anonymous No.9423242]

What do you get when you cross an Eskimo with a black person?
A Snowblower that Doesn't work!

[Anonymous No.9423274]

I tried tricking an Inuit guy last night ...but he was having Nunavut

Then I admitted it was a trick. He replied "I nuit."

[Anonymous No.9423283]

Kek best bread on /ck/

[Anonymous No.9423414]

>>9422945
that's an ice one

[Anonymous No.9423564]

>>9422971
Kek

[Anonymous No.9423851]

>>9422966
i don't get it

[Anonymous No.9423853]

>>9423851
Frozen fart...

[Anonymous No.9423934]

>>9423119
>superiour in every way
>get fucked by inferiour cumskins
weak bait, faggot

[Anonymous No.9423936]

>>9422757
if it fits my macros

[Anonymous No.9423963]

Anyone ever ate seal or whale? What's it taste like?

[Anonymous No.9423979]

>>9423274
>>9423178
What is this red meat?

[Anonymous No.9424012]

>>9423979
Salmon

[Anonymous No.9424058]

Be 50' N Canadian, back in elementary school, some time in grade 5 we had some snow Mexican come to school to tell us about the North and at the end of the presentation they had some caribou for us to try. Nope.

[Anonymous No.9424078]

This bread is North as fuck, Johnny the lemming attached...

[Anonymous No.9424160]

>>9424058
Caribou is good, so is moose. I've also had sea lion, seal and whale. Sea lion and seal aren't too bad, but the whale was way too fishy for me, even though I love oily fishes.

[Anonymous No.9424163]

>>9423963
I've had whale sashimi. It's like beef with the texture of tuna

[Anonymous No.9424249]

>>9422971
Someone explain this to me pls

[Anonymous No.9424258]

>>9424249
“Polar Night”

[Anonymous No.9424280]

>>9423079

Crisco and fucking berries. That sounds fucking disgusting.

[Anonymous No.9424283]

>>9423110

>tfw no qt inuit wife to hack up a seal for you

[Anonymous No.9424293]

>>9424078
implying you have the fucking balls to jump off a fucking cliff

[Anonymous No.9424556]

>>9424163
Μmmmmm....

[Anonymous No.9424560]

>>9422757
Stolen mouthwash isn't a food.

[Anonymous No.9424639]

A man is lost in the hot desert for days. Suddenly he looks up and sees a pack a dogs pulling an Eskimo on a sled.The dehydrated desperate man says to the Eskimo, Im lost. Can You help me?

The Eskimo says back, You think youre lost!

WTF milk prices... just get powdered

>>9423225
Penguin + Eskimo, should of caught that.

[Anonymous No.9424646]

How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.

[Anonymous No.9424653]

>>9422757
I bet those jackets smell awful. You know they don't wash them after getting them soaked in blood.

[Anonymous No.9424655]

fuck no!

there is a good reason why you dont see eskimo restaurants.

[Anonymous No.9424662]

An Eskimo walks into a bakery and orders an apple pie, a cherry pie and a blueberry pie. The baker says, "sorry, we don't serve Eskimo pies here."

[Anonymous No.9424706]

I'm Eskimo

[Anonymous No.9424707]

>>9424655
And what reason is that?

[Anonymous No.9424794]

>>9424707
no demand for their food = no restaurants anywhere

there is a reason why every bumfuck town has a burger joint, chinese, and italian restaurant.

[Anonymous No.9425076]

>>9423119
But that didn't happen, and anyway you're wrong as fuck. Europeans 2000 years ago until now would all rape eskimos in warfare at any time before they civilised.

[Anonymous No.9425930]

no i'm not a savage

[Anonymous No.9426036]

>>9424655
There's a few in Quebec.

[Anonymous No.9426051]

Why are Liberal Vegans so racist and hateful that they want to ban foreign minorities way of life and 1000 year old cultures?

Do vegans want to commit cultural genocide with everyone?

[Anonymous No.9426061]

>>9426051
>Why are Liberal Vegans so racist and hateful that they want to ban foreign minorities way of life and 1000 year old cultures?

To prove that Vegans are "superior" to other races.

Vegans feel like they're simply "better people" than the primitive animal eating brown folks.

[Anonymous No.9426081]

>>9426051
Here's how it works, they virtue signal about how diverse and inclusive they are until they meet a minority that doesn't agree with them, then mutter 'shitskins' under their breaths and go back to cosplaying as decent human beings.

[Anonymous No.9426141]

>>9423118
Damn, would slow roast and enjoy

[Anonymous No.9426151]

>>9426061

Vegans are usually spoiled, upper middle class white kids with zero personality or Identity. They adopt arbitrary rules like Veganism, so they can pretend like they have Value in society and are "morally superior" to others.

[Anonymous No.9426165]

>>9423080
Kill yourself ya fuckin retard

[Anonymous No.9426174]

>>9426151
t. obese shitskin

[Anonymous No.9426176]

>>9422757
I'd eat an Eskimo.

[Anonymous No.9426179]

>>9426151
>Vegans are usually spoiled, upper middle class white kids with zero personality or Identity. They adopt arbitrary rules like Veganism, so they can pretend like they have Value in society and are "morally superior" to others.

This. Literally spoiled white kids desperate for an identity.

[Anonymous No.9426186]

>>9426174

lol. hit a little too close to home, didn't it?

[Anonymous No.9426192]

>>9426186
Kek got eeeem

[Anonymous No.9426235]

>>9426176
Pic 4U
>>9426165
(you) 4U
Why did the Eskimos have to stop partying?
Couldn't break the ice at the party...

[Anonymous No.9426245]

>>9426179

[Anonymous No.9426255]

>>9426186
>>9426192
>obese shitskin pathetically samefagging this hard

Sad!

[Anonymous No.9427355]

>>9426235

how is the pink guy on the right not finnish ?

[Anonymous No.9429112]

>>9422757
Those motherfuckers look like vampires.

jinkies, i am spooked to death

[Anonymous No.9429126]

>>9423119
>"when not 1/100 could physically have competed with them before they adopted the shit cumskin culture"

alcohol belongs to everyone. Guess it just belongs to Natives more than others.

[Anonymous No.9429148]

>>9422757
We called INUIT you racist cow eating big forehead you !

[Anonymous No.9429234]

>>942466[2
uhhhh no. sirloin steak per kg may be 30 bucks way north 20 bucks some north but it is not 1.50 in southern can, its like 10 dollars.

[Anonymous No.9429255]

>>9422757
It's just meat.
So...
Probably.

[Anonymous No.9429271]

>>9423007
I made out with the eskimo girl when I was 14, it was pretty awesome. Of course she said i raped her afterwards but that's just women for yah.

[Anonymous No.9429377]

>>9422757
as a vegan, this thread triggers me to no end
why do these people practice such brutality?
why can't they eat veggies and soysausages and such that don't cause immense pain to living, feeling creatures?

[Anonymous No.9429534]

>>9429377
lel @ ALT RIGHT faggots thinking they can bait anyone w/ such low quality SJW vegan crap bait

[Anonymous No.9429538]

>>9429255
Who's this Eskimo?

[Anonymous No.9429607]

>>9426081
I just get called a white supremacist whenever I disagree with the average lefty even though I'm both non white and far left myself.

Can't wait to leave the west coast.

[Anonymous No.9429619]

>>9429377
troll harder

[Anonymous No.9429653]

>>9426051
>Why are Liberal Vegans so racist and hateful that they want to ban foreign minorities way of life and 1000 year old cultures?

Veganism is nothing more than a club where white kids can feel superior to those that can't afford overpriced Whole Foods products.

Moral superiority is pretty much the only reason these spoiled upper-middle class white kids become vegans.

[Anonymous No.9429661]

>>9426179
>>Vegans are usually spoiled, upper middle class white kids with zero personality or Identity. They adopt arbitrary rules like Veganism, so they can pretend like they have Value in society and are "morally superior" to others.
>This. Literally spoiled white kids desperate for an identity.

Agreed. Very astute observation...

[Anonymous No.9429680]

>>9422757
Yes, if I had too. I'd rather eat a donair though.

[Anonymous No.9429746]

>>9423119
>welcome pilgrims, we welcome you to our dinners
>TIME TO RAPE YOUR PEOPLE WITH DISEASE AND ACTUALLY RAPE YOUR WOMEN
GET FUCKED

[Anonymous No.9429777]

WHO WINS IN A STRAIGHT UP FIGHT?

An adult male Eskimo vs. 200 Vegan Toddlers

[Anonymous No.9429796]

>>9429661
i eat like a vegan because i am poor, so ive interacted with them a lot for advise on how to eat basic stuff.

but yeah most of them are insufferable very left wing feminists and try to make it about racism and shit

[Anonymous No.9429803]

>>9429796
>i eat vegan becaue I'm poor
Good luck with that.

[Anonymous No.9430332]

>>9429607
>far left
Do you even know what that means?

[Anonymous No.9430338]

>>9422757
im half eskimo, and have only tried some of the stuff. theres some pretty raw stuff, like skimo ice cream, which is basically fat and berries, or spoiled fish heads, which are supposed to be nasty.
then theres stuff like smoked salmon and raw whale which is delicious. so i guess its what you eat.

[Anonymous No.9430347]

>>9422769
Same thing

[Anonymous No.9430352]

>>9430347
Far East of Russia =/= Siberia.

[Anonymous No.9430409]

>>9429777
Traditional arctic sports are all about pain endurance and carrying heavy loads for long distances, replicating survival skills and training required for hunting large animals several days away from the village.
Relevant sports include tug-of-war by way of tying two men's ears together, a lot of high and long jumps from awkward positions, full-body arm wrestling, 4-man carry, and turn-based boxing.

Closest sport to a dogpile of toddlers is the 4 Man Carry, where an Inuk has 4 of his buddies pile on top of him and he has to carry them all until he collapses.
Standardized combined weight for competition purposes is 600lbs.

Assuming a vegan toddler is on the low-end for average weight, ~15lbs, an Inuk man could tackle about 40 vegan toddlers at once, so he'd have to somehow kite the 200 toddlers and take them on in groups of five.

[Anonymous No.9430415]

>>9430409
>take them on in groups of five.
take them on in five groupings* rather
Maybe more and smaller groups as he gets tired

[Anonymous No.9430540]

>>9422953

Me on the left.

[Anonymous No.9430554]

>>9430409
>>9429777
Why, I once watched "Gentleman" Jim Corbett fight an Eskimo fellow bare-knuckled for a hundred and thirteen rounds! Of course, back then, if a fight lasted less than fifty rounds, we demanded our nickel back!

[Anonymous No.9430778]

>>9429803
rice, beans, potatoes, cabbage, carrots
apples when i have extra money
its poverty tier

[Anonymous No.9431051]

>>9422757
Those snow mongs eat the absolute weirdest shit. Like dried halibut splooge. And raw whale blubber with the skin still on. I'm not fucking with you, they really do.

[Anonymous No.9431274]

>>9423007
UMA