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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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9352382 No.9352382 [Reply] [Original]

Helloooooooo this is Chef John from Fooooooooooodwishes.com wiiiiiiith,

>> No.9352383

scabs!

>> No.9352392

>>9352382
The food he makes is good but I find the cadence/flow of his speech unbearable.

>> No.9352404
File: 73 KB, 1286x600, 14-Amazing-Benefits-Of-Cayenne-Pepper-For-Skin-Hair-And-Health[1].jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9352404

>>9352392

I find it the only redeemable part about the entire channel.. i wouldn't watch it if he continued with his old mundane voice like he did when he first started making videos.

>> No.9352599

>>9352383
Anyone have the full pasta?

>> No.9352608

maybe that's just how he talks

>> No.9352932

>>9352392
He's apparently into BDSM. Imagine that voice with sexual torture

>> No.9353006

Why does he always end his sentences on a high note like he's asking a question?

>> No.9353974

>>9352932
>and as always...suff-feeer!

>> No.9355088

>>9352404
Seconded. His humor is also a plus.

>> No.9355140

>>9352599
Hello this is Chef John and welcome to foodwishes.com with!...

A plate of scabs!

Yes that's right, for this nice and warm summer weather we're gonna being making a beauuuuutiful plate of scabs for any family gathering

or, if you lost your family in a horrific accident, just yourself

ok, so lets get started

we're gonna your elbows or your knees, a bowl, and some nice course ground sandpaper

and I'm using some tuscan 80 grit sandpaper, but you can use just about anything here

just don't use anything higher than 120 grit

we're making scabs here, not some bruises

and your gonna start rubbing this sandpaper deep into your elbows.

just give those tender elbows the ooooooold scrapuh scrapuh

it's gonna hurt at first, but hey no one ever said making scabs wasn't going to be painful

so rub your elbows, or your knees with that sandpaper until it starts to bleed, and you're gonna want a sizeable amount of blood.

remember, you're running the lab on your bowl of scabs

and once you got a good amount of profuse bleeding, were' gonna take a pinch of gravel and add it to the bowl

and it could be any kind, i like to throw in a little bit of twigs and rocks

and of course some cayenne

and we're gonna let this blood sit out in the sun for about 4 days

after about four days it should look like this, nice and dark and rich, with some flakes of gravel in it

and it is doooooooone!

look at that a big gnarly looking plate of scabs to show your friends and loved ones

I like to put them right back on my arms and peel them off, just like the real thing

so head on over to foodwishes dot com for all the recipe details

and as alllwaaaaaayyyyy

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

>> No.9356248

>>9355140
>No mention of ancillary info on the blog post

Nice attempt. Try harder next time

>> No.9356252

I can't follow his Twitter anymore. It's just an echo chamber.

>> No.9356294

>>9353006
He doesn't. Many people do but that's not what John is doing. Go listen again.

>> No.9356305

buy parmesan cheese you poorfags

>> No.9356413
File: 1.97 MB, 3264x2448, 1483067601788.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9356413

*Injects liquid cayenne into urethra*
>after all, you are the master of you piss blaster

>> No.9356419

>>9356413
What is this?

>> No.9356667

>>9356413
Seriously wtf is that?

>> No.9356687

>>9356419
>>9356667
Looks like Tapioca Pandan cake of some sort. SEA dish. It's pretty good.

>> No.9356693

>>9356419
>>9356667
Looks like a cannabutter crumpet that got fucked up

>> No.9356726

>>9352383
Never gets old.

>> No.9356741

>>9352608
Nah, if he talked like that for real somebody would surely have killed him at some point in his life.

>> No.9356748

>>9356741
I've read it's how he records, in several takes.

>> No.9356775
File: 38 KB, 302x302, 1503814605401.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9356775

You are the _________ of your _______!

Can you fill in the blanks /ck/?