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/ck/ - Food & Cooking


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File: 135 KB, 962x1193, 2C23337B00000578-3229097-Orange_sushi_with_tomato_sauce_glaze_This_was_one_of_the_photogr-a-6_1441909939775.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7802826 No.7802826 [Reply] [Original]

http://phrasegenerator.com/food

You're hosting a dinner party, with the main decided by this website. How fucked are you?

Hardmode: Complement your main with a full three-course meal plan

>> No.7802833

"Spiced Pumpkin and Pineapple Fondue tossed with Steaming Scallop and Grape Chutney"

i guess it's food

>> No.7802834

>Steaming Kale and Liver Shish-Kebab tossed with Chilled Bell Pepper

Whelp.

>> No.7802837
File: 39 KB, 408x352, 1445046196254.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7802837

Brown Cheddar and Lunch Meat Tea topped with Grilled Squash Sauce
>Brown Cheddar and Lunch Meat Tea

>> No.7802842

>>7802826
>Bass Beverage with Fermented Mussel and Grapefruit Jam

fucking bass beverage

>> No.7802843
File: 37 KB, 305x227, IMG_201606173_013536.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7802843

Actually extremely useful for blank minded people. Thanks.

>except for lunch meat tea

>> No.7802847

>>7802843
>Sweet Rhubarb Omelette topped with Barbecued Carrot Chutney
...I'd try it

>> No.7802848
File: 24 KB, 320x480, Screenshot_2016-06-21-01-38-41.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7802848

More. Well maybe not as useful as I thought.

>> No.7802857
File: 48 KB, 320x219, IMG_201606173_014207.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7802857

Roasted mussel sticks with a side of creamy tangerine and duck

Baked Peanut and Polish Sausage Gravy on a bed of Aged Tofu and Head Cheese Pie

Sauteed Grapefruit Sandwich with Orange Swordfish Noodles

Dry-roasted Spam and Trout with a side of Muskrat and Pastrami

OK this shit is hilarious, not useful.

>> No.7802858

>Greenish Shellfish Juice served with Sweet Tamarind and Pork Scones

I... what?

>> No.7802860
File: 59 KB, 320x230, IMG_201606173_014540.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7802860

HOT DOG TEA

>> No.7802862

>>7802842

Maybe you're supposed to drain the blood of a bass fish and serve it with vodka?

>> No.7802865
File: 50 KB, 322x279, 1464644054632.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7802865

>Steaming Mystery Meat Beverage with a side of Broiled Cod and Spam

>> No.7802867

>Fragrant oatmeal with spiced meat bread

Breakfast of champions

>> No.7802875
File: 56 KB, 313x240, IMG_201606173_015259.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7802875

Reddish Garlic Muffins topped with Hot Meat and Cod Drink

>hot meat and cod drink

Sizzling Mustard and Oatmeal Balls on a bed of Rutabaga Sauce

Flame-broiled Lemon Chunks with a side of Watermelon and Carrot Tarts
(Your average vegan meal)

Chilled Garlic Cake topped with Orange Head Cheese Puree

>> No.7802878

Someone with a tablet start drawing what this shit would actually look like please?

>> No.7802880

>Sweet and Sour Pine Nut and Hot Dog Noodles served with Watermelon Scramble
I....I don't understand what kind of monster is responsible for this.

>> No.7802882

>>7802867
That sounds pretty good

>> No.7802887

>Carrot tossed with Roasted Watermelon and Turkey

Can watermelon even be roasted?

>> No.7802888

>>7802887
Watermelon can be grilled so why not.

>> No.7802892
File: 56 KB, 976x634, Screen Shot 2016-06-21 at 2.00.46 AM.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7802892

Well okay then.

>> No.7802894

>>7802887
You obviously aren't committed to your result

>> No.7802897

>>7802892
I mean, it's probably the easiest one here

>> No.7802899

>>7802897
How do you balance a pie on a peeled grape?
inb4 all about the presentation

>> No.7802907
File: 62 KB, 645x388, fucktheyrereal.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7802907

>>7802892
>>7802897
>>7802899
>Googled 'apple pie grapes'
>found several things like pic related

It's not exact but close enough.

>> No.7802908
File: 7 KB, 626x555, peeled grape topped with apple pie.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7802908

>>7802892
>>7802897
>>7802899

>> No.7802944

>Sumptuous Tofu Drink with Sweet Bacon Juice

I hope my guests are memetards.

>> No.7803048

>Flame-broiled Rice Pizza topped with Steamed Banana Cake
Sounds potentially tasty. Mochi dessert pizza with a layer of coconut flakes and steamed banana rounds. Or a rice-crust pizza with a more savory banana topping, maybe even plantains.

>> No.7803053

Broiled Sausage and Muskrat Sticks served with Barbecued Mussel and Trout Paste

.. Interesting to say the least,

>> No.7803058

>>7802834
This is the best sounding out of all in this thread. Now I wish I had red capsicum

>> No.7803063
File: 352 KB, 1996x1122, lemontart-almond.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7803063

Lemon Pie with Roasted Almond

>> No.7803065

Spiced Bell Pepper and Cod Sticks on a bed of Steaming Bass and Rice Omelette

...yummy

>> No.7803069

sounds very good, actually
"Deep-fried Sausage on a bed of Cheddar and Kielbasa Pilaf"

>> No.7803072
File: 37 KB, 540x960, 1460387718819_0.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7803072

Decadent yam and mushroom on a bed of liver strogonoff

>> No.7803073

>>7802826
Aged Squash topped with Steaming Kielbasa and Pork Pilaf

sounds pretty damn good to me.

>> No.7803074

Could be worse
Brown Mussel with a side of Beige Lamb and Turmeric Fritters

>> No.7803094

" Apple and Watermelon Juice topped with Tofu and Rice Sauce"

What.

>> No.7803096
File: 16 KB, 540x283, 7e5.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7803096

>decadent ham milkshake with turkey and tortilla stroganoff.

>> No.7803103

>Peeled Pulled Pork and Bell Pepper with a side of Cheese Souffle

>peeled pulled

i'm fucking dying

>> No.7803107

>Toasted Mussel and Lamb Fondue on a bed of Creamy Meat Pizza

>lamb fondue

>creamy meat pizza

>> No.7803108

>Pan-fried Hot Dog with Ketchup and Mustard Paste

>tfw I got something completely normal

>> No.7803112
File: 10 KB, 455x283, wtf.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7803112

lads

>> No.7803118

im fucking sitting here giggling like a retard at these fucking foods

>> No.7803121

>>7803112
you're doing it wrong m8

>> No.7803122
File: 54 KB, 612x612, sheg.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7803122

>aged cheese and cheese with fragrant rice and beaver soup

>> No.7803125

>>7803122

>aged cheese and cheese

>> No.7803128
File: 69 KB, 556x370, jesus christ.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7803128

>tuna oil with a side of aged grapefruit and grape gravy

>> No.7803141
File: 43 KB, 652x521, 1459143873188.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7803141

Head cheese pizza with grilled mock duck and seaweed muffins

>head cheese
>go' za'

>> No.7803148

Decadent Scallop and Kale with Sauteed Trout Smoothie

>> No.7803155

>Deep-fried Pumpkin and Hazelnut Fritters served with Brown Apple Sushi

Hm. Somebody should make this.

>> No.7803191

>>7803148
Mmmmmm trout smoothie

>> No.7803325

>polish sausage sticks with yellowed frankfurter balls

>imagining how i'd plate that

>> No.7803368

>Sauteed Bacon and Scallop Soup tossed with Pastrami Pasta

i'd eat the fuck out of it pham

>> No.7803369

>Beaver with Ketchup Cake

Beaver meatloaf.

Lemme try another because that one was kind of easy.

>Shellfish puree served with garlic and walnut salad

Also easy. Seafood mousse with a green salad.

>> No.7803421

>>7803325
DICKS AND BALLS

>> No.7804631

>Chilled Carrot and Bell Pepper Milkshake with a side of Brown Mustard and Yam Sushi

Before I cook this I must enact my master plan. I move to a new area, make new friends, gain a reputation as the good cook of the group.

I host multiple successful dinner parties, cookouts, etc. and maybe I even become a contestant on MasterChef.

Then, one fateful day, preferably a lazy June Friday, I host a dinner party that will be "unmatched forever" - I get their hopes up high for the moment of retribution.

When the time finally arrives, I bring out the appetizer. The first stop on my ruse cruise. With suspense, I introduce Aunt Myrna's Party Cheese Salad. They look at it in disbelief. They choke it down, still holding hope in their hearts that it's all just a joke. A couple of people start to leave. I reassure them that there's still an entrée and main course, to keep their hopes up.

Then comes the entrée which I introduce as a classic Chicago-style pizza. In reality, it is just hastily made lasagna topped with cilantro. The guests are starting to worry at this point, but at this point they're more like victims with Stockholm Syndrome.

While they hesitantly chokes those two "meals" down, I prepare the chilled carrot and bell pepper milkshake, which is just whole carrot, bell peppers, milk, and ice blended together, poured into a large communal jug with enough Silly Straws for everyone to drink from. After that, I get the yams and cover them in vinegared rice for the sushi, and add sesame seeds and soy sauce for effect. Finally, I place brown mustard all over the concoction. All over the "milkshake" and sushi.

By now I'm sure these guests aren't friends anymore, so I move to another area and start the whole process again.

>> No.7804660

>Ketchup and Garlic Scramble served with Dry-roasted Abalone and Sea Urchin Paste

>> No.7804705

>Polish Sausage and Sausage Fondue with Chilled Oyster and Peanut Scramble

Uh...

>> No.7804763
File: 16 KB, 474x291, texancuisine.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7804763

wew

>> No.7804866
File: 84 KB, 1187x737, image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7804866

Other than "brown cheese" this would be pretty simple

>> No.7804897
File: 14 KB, 487x305, niggourmet.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7804897

>> No.7804910
File: 21 KB, 600x439, bass-ale-best-worst-beer-md[1].jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7804910

>>7802842
>bass beverage

>> No.7805273 [DELETED] 

>>7802867
>>7802860
>>7802892
>>7803063
>>7803112
>>7803369
Spotted the faggots who didn't click randomise again when they went to the link

>> No.7805443

Kale and Chard topped with Steamed Apple

pretty bland but edible

>> No.7805563

>Stewed Pine Nut and Coriander Stew with a side of Spiced Cheese

I'd eat it

>> No.7805619

>Stewed Oatmeal Roll with Colorful Spam and Pulled Pork Gravy

Sounds possible

>> No.7805648

Fragrant Mushroom and Coriander Flatbread with Salted Pine Nut

Hell yeah

>> No.7806055

Coriander and Lamb on a bed of Cheese Powder..

A little creativity could make it work?

>> No.7806069

>>7802908
Holy fuck i have tears in my eyes.

>> No.7806077
File: 11 KB, 466x291, hghhhhhhhh.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7806077

>> No.7806084
File: 793 KB, 1000x563, 2x02_Her?.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7806084

>Dry-roasted Apple on a bed of Toasted Pulled Pork and Kielbasa

>> No.7806098
File: 26 KB, 862x354, gourmand.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7806098

Honestly, it could probably be pretty good. Replace the bacon with a veg and it could even appease vegan faggots.

>> No.7806111
File: 60 KB, 888x540, Screen Shot 2016-06-21 at 10.41.40 PM.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7806111

wew lad

>> No.7806128

>clicked on corporate slogans

my sides

>> No.7806136

Fermented Bass and Cod Roll with Clam and Coriander Scramble

Jesus Christ. Thank fuck I live in a sea town, at least the clams would be fresh

>> No.7806142

Steaming Goat Tarts tossed with Colorful Cheese and Mustard

>> No.7806145

>>7802908
10/10

>> No.7806150

>>7806145
Meant to reply to >>7806142

>> No.7806162

>>7806150
No I didn't. Fuck off.

>> No.7806165
File: 20 KB, 462x292, Capture.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7806165

>> No.7806168

>>7806145
>>7806150
Ignore this faggot pretending to be me >>7806162

>> No.7806193

>>7806168
Are you actually retarded? Pretending to be another ANONYMOUS POSTER to like a comment? Why not make a post yourself? Fuck off.

>> No.7806209

>Hot Oatmeal and Ketchup Sauce tossed with Sauteed Watermelon and Sausage Omelette

>> No.7806215

>Flame-broiled Tofu and Squash on a bed of Creamy Cheddar Chunks

will add
>parsley barley salad with hazelnuts
>grapefruit brown sugar cake

>> No.7806216

>>7806193
You're way too easy to fuck with

>> No.7806218

>>7802860
>greenish ketchup

>> No.7806223

>>7806165
Where would you get beige peanuts anyway?

>> No.7806234

>>7806223
you dye them, moron

>> No.7806238
File: 76 KB, 632x395, beaver3.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7806238

>Stewed Lunch Meat with a side of Deep-fried Beaver

>> No.7806247
File: 187 KB, 1061x1600, sad-beige-peanut-cartoon-a-depressed-disappointed-character-standing-on-a-white-background-182915996.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7806247

>>7806223
>beige peanuts

>> No.7806254

>Sumptuous Oatmeal and Hazelnut Oil tossed with Shellfish Pasta

hazelnut crusted deep fried little oatmeal cakes, toss those in creamy shrimp linguini. should be fine.

>> No.7806305

>Pan-fried Rice Milkshake with Chilled Pine Nut and Mustard

Milkshake with rice milk and egg, cook with ginger juice, hot mustard powder, shitake mushroom powder. add toasted sesame seeds and pine nuts. make custard ice cream.

wrap ice cream in mochi and fry in pork fat.

salad of asian pear with garlic chips

>> No.7806360

one more
>Barbecued Spinach Sushi topped with Broiled Pork and Garlic
>soul food sushi
malt vinegared rice and smoked greens wrapped in nori, topped with pork slices and bbq sauce heavy on the soy sauce. cornbread rounds with kewpie and ikura. something with okra.

>> No.7806421

>Savory Salmon and Lamb Beverage topped with Lemon

Well I was happy with this until Beverage.
Could do some gastronomy bullshit and serve some distilled lamb with nitrogen frozen lamb cubes and lemon spheres.
Or I could liquefy a salmon fillet and rack of lamb and serve it in a glass.

might be bad

>> No.7806429
File: 331 KB, 416x408, 1463007184824.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7806429

>Steamed Hot Dog Sauce served with Pine Nut and Mock-Duck Pasta

>> No.7806442

>>7802826
Roasted Head Cheese Gravy with Steamed Duck Fondue

ah yes, i love to dip my gravy in fondue.

i would complement with actual things to dip in fondue like bread and sausage and the head cheese gravy could be used for mashed potatoes or i could serve slice boiled potatoes that can be both dipped in fondue or covered in gravy.

>> No.7806466
File: 167 KB, 1080x1920, Screenshot_2016-06-22-13-42-19.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7806466

>>7802826
Absolutely disgusting.jpg

>> No.7806470

>>7806466
>this faggot doesn't like the classic Yam n' Spam combo.

>> No.7806517

>>7806466
Alliteration and rhymes. Would bank with a hipster crowd.

>> No.7807071

>>7805563
>Stewed stew

>> No.7807077

>>7802826
>Hot Banana and Walnut tossed with Tortilla Flatbread
This is too easy
fry the tortilla to make it crispy and then cover it with cinnamon and sugar
caramelize the bananas and cook them with walnuts adding vanilla and a bit of cream to make it taste like pudding or custard
scoop the banana walnut mixture onto the tortilla while still hot

>> No.7807079

>>7802826

Ignore the fuck out of it-

A main of bull squid.

With a main course of sockeye salmon

You fully didn't let me have fun.

>> No.7807081

>>7807077

>I want friend bullshit from mexico with armit bradaga

Good, and the main?

>> No.7807086

>>7807081

Real chef-

We need to make a salsa and a g-spo, get that going and rip a win out, kid this is not a game.

>> No.7807096

>>7807086

What's your name kid? Ashby?

That's the ashby sauce.

>> No.7807522
File: 27 KB, 630x379, average flyover cuisine.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7807522

>> No.7808127

>>7802826
Steaming Banana Cake tossed with Fermented Mystery Meat and Mussel Smoothie

>> No.7808162

Broiled Grape Pasta topped with Pine Nut and Watermelon Oil

Could be worse.

>> No.7808182

Cod on a bed of baked trout.

>> No.7808191

> Peeled Polish Sausage and Grape with Roasted Ham Noodles
It doesn't sound too repulsive.

>> No.7808218
File: 15 KB, 295x211, 1464822134141.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7808218

Shellfish and bacon jam with pulled pork and roast beef sandwich, disgust