/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.7679381]

Cooking pet peeves thread. I'll start.

>seasoning only one side of the meat

[Anonymous No.7679383]

>>7679381
ive seen people do this and i question their intelligence everytime

[Anonymous No.7679644]

>>7679381
>geats.png
(You)

[Anonymous No.7679681]

Nothing wrong with that. Being able to taste the meat both seasoned and unseasoned will give you greater appreciation for the gifts you've been given. It also makes the food more umami. That's why all the Japanese do it.

[Anonymous No.7679715]

>>7679381
1.) Adding red wine to fish / seafrodo.
2.) Adding cheese to EVERYTHING. Subsection; Adding cheese to soup. Adding cheese to seafood, to wit; parmesan cheese and mussels, cheese and salmon (notable exception creamcheese & bagel)
3.) Adding additional meat to a hamburger; i seriously once had a hamburger with added brisket, mushroom and bacon. Where will it end?

[Anonymous No.7679727]

>>7679381
>umami

More like memeami.

>oh anon we have a special tast that none else has.
Is it whale?
>no anon its umami

Seriously, mofos better get used to saying savory.

[Anonymous No.7679739]

>>7679727
spinach is savory but isn't umami. they have distinct meanings

[Anonymous No.7679747]

>>7679739
Only Nips and Nip-worshiping NEETs think this. They're the same for everyone else.

[Anonymous No.7679751]

>>7679715
>mushrooms are meat

[Anonymous No.7679781]

Acting boastful about food you put the minimum effort into. My mother's 'specialty dish' is spaghetti, which means she cooks spaghetti and pours on plain hamburger, canned mushrooms, and barilla spaghetti sauce. This is the extent of her cooking prowess. My father is the much better cook, but only by default, the most complicated thing he makes a beef stew consisting of vegetables, water, 'stew meat' from walmart, and a packet of beef stew mix.

When I moved out and got the funds I got wild with making up for the years and years of eating their convenience 'cooking' over and over. There are so many foods I've tried for the first time only in the last year of my life. Before moving out, I had never had butternut squash, eggplant, shiitake mushrooms, cous cous, cat fish, goat cheese, bolognese, the list is enormous. I've had more food these last two years than the first 18 years of my life.

It makes me depressed that my situation isn't uncommon, that it's probably in fact the norm in America.

[Anonymous No.7679798]

Dipshits who have to have everything tailored to their insane, petty, childish needs. maybe it's from working hospitality
for so many years in a pretty conservative culinary climate but these stupid motherfuckers make me want to scream.

[Anonymous No.7679801]

>>7679381
Faggots on TV and YouTube cooking videos who put cilantro on fucking everything. Disgusting.

[Anonymous No.7679804]

>the word 'umami'
>calling minced meat 'hamburger'

[Anonymous No.7679811]

>>7679801
Your genes are defective. Look up 'cilantro soap gene.'

[Anonymous No.7679814]

>>7679747
In other words you still can't identify umami so complain about it to justify your ignorance.

[Anonymous No.7679866]

>>7679381
That fucking 'Tasty' page on Facebook and similar pages. Everyove loves the shit that they put up on there. They think that putting mozzerella and bacon on anything makes is the best dish ever. Its just bad fucking cooking and people fucking lapp it up

[Anonymous No.7679872]

>>7679811
No, your genes are defective. I can actually taste the shit chemicals that are in cilantro, and you cant.

So I can taste things better than you, that's why I can tell it sucks ass.

[Anonymous No.7679876]

>>7679801
>>7679811
Jesus /ck/ please stop

[Anonymous No.7679907]

>>7679811
>reverse google
>links to huffington post

I never huffington. Besides, isnt the owner of huffington an ex CIA guy who had 70% of his investment money donated by the government?

Because that is a thing y'know.

[Anonymous No.7679914]

>>7679866

Because people are all fucking idiots who just want shit that gets shared easily on Instagram and
Snapchat and all that other normie bullshit. \ck\ infographics aren't any better, they're probably worse in a lot of way.

[Anonymous No.7679923]

>>7679872
Holy shit you must coast through life with your nimble mental acrobatics. That's not how the gene works you mong.

[Anonymous No.7679927]

>>7679907
It's not a reverse google search if you're searching for words you fucking retard. Also, there are articles by the New York Times, NPR, and Fox News saying the same shit.

[Anonymous No.7679949]

>calling coriander 'cilantro'

[Anonymous No.7680060]

>>7679781
Do you live in the neighborhood adjacent to Edward scissor hands abode?

[Anonymous No.7680066]

>>7679949
I hope you know coriander is cilantro seed.

[Anonymous No.7680075]

>>7680066
>Coriander (UK /ˌkɒrJˈændə/;[1] US /ˈkɔːriˌændər/ or /ˌkɔːriˈændər/;[2] Coriandrum sativum), also known as cilantro (/sJˈlɑːntroʊ/)[3] or Chinese parsley, is an annual herb in the family Apiaceae. All parts of the plant are edible, but the fresh leaves and the dried seeds are the parts most traditionally used in cooking.

[Anonymous No.7680094]

>>7680075
>All parts of the plant are edible
I wonder how coriander root tastes.

[Anonymous No.7680104]

>>7679781
Not only is your situation uncommon, the situation is much worse for most. TV dinners, constant fast food, constant exposure and consumption of high fat/high sugar/overprocessed garbage that is "cheap" and accessible.

Whenever I get sad though, I try to appreciate that at least I've opened my eyes to eating better and more culturally, instead of remaining as a fast-food/chain eating sheep. Then I try and educate friends by letting them sample my cooking and showing how easy it can be. My roommate said he bought a slow cooker and he cooks more often because of me. Good feel man.

[Anonymous No.7680115]

>>7680075
Se llama cilantro porque haci es Como lo dice mi cultural puta.

[Anonymous No.7680120]

>>7679866
>spicy chicken bacon cheesy barbecue mozzarella sticks
I swear every single recipe is some weird ass combination of foods that don't mix

[Anonymous No.7680122]

>>7680115
Like >>7679949 said
>calling coriander 'cilantro'

[Anonymous No.7680203]

>>7679781
Is your mother Marie and does she have a YouTube channel about cooking?

*plop!*

[Anonymous No.7680212]

>>7680094
I just googled it and there are a bunch of recipes... Thanks for piquing my interest

[Anonymous No.7680956]

>>7679781
>>7680104
The realest feelest. I cook and bake like crazy whenever I visit home, my parents have a stocked kitchen and will buy me ingredients but just... don't care for cooking, apparently

[Anonymous No.7681036]

>>7679715
>Adding cheese to seafood

Tuna melt sandwiches though.

[Anonymous No.7681230]

>>7679381

>breaking spaghetti in half for "even cooking"
>cooking cold meat straight from the fridge
>pre ground black pepper
>not mixing sauce with pasta in the pot/pan
>margarine
>throwing food in before the pan is hot
>boiling lasagne sheets
>when people make pizza at home and put the cheese over the rest of the toppings

[Anonymous No.7681240]

>>7681036

Tuna pasta bake

Brie and lobster

Mussels and blue cheese


Jesus fuck that guy needs to just go.

[Anonymous No.7681266]

>>7681230
I've never seen someone boil a lasagna sheet, but I'd probably REEEE if I did.

[Anonymous No.7681274]

>>7679715
Adding cheese to soup is disgusting, while adding it to fist is great. Fuck you smoking?

[Anonymous No.7681279]

>>7679914
post the best ck infographs ya got

[Anonymous No.7681281]

>>7681266
>>7681230
Wait, I thought that's what you're supposed to do. I... I guess you let it cook in fat/steam in the oven when the lasagna is assembled?

[Anonymous No.7681301]

>>7679747
>durr I dun have tastebuds, time to be racist xD

Kill yourself immediately.

[Anonymous No.7681305]

>>7679715
so you chose to eat a hamburger that had such a large variety of meat it upset you?

[Anonymous No.7681309]

>"I like my steaks well done."

[Anonymous No.7681331]

>>7681281

I've only seen it in America and UK to be honest, it just makes no sense to boil the sheets because it ruins the whole dish, if you let the lasagna sheets cook in the oven all the pasta soaks up the sauce and the starch helps it hold together. I guess you do need a little more sauce but the end result is 10x times better.

[Anonymous No.7681338]

>>7681230
Lasagna with pre-cooked pasta is so much better faggott

[Anonymous No.7681349]

>>7679804
Yeah that's a pretty stupid word, but how else would you describe the taste of msg?

[Anonymous No.7681353]

>>7681349
Yummy.

[Anonymous No.7681360]

>>7681309
Medium rare is the way to go. But they always fuck that up.

[Anonymous No.7681371]

>>7681353
Lel. can imagine some faggots describing the taste of something as 'umami'.

[Anonymous No.7681374]

>>7681360
I cook Rare at home and go Medium Rare at restaurants, though I only order steak from real restaurants so that's a rarity.

[Anonymous No.7681381]

>>7681371
I don't have to imagine it, your dad says it whenever he gets done sucking me off.

[Anonymous No.7681393]

>complaining about the term umami

Sure is flyover circa 1993 here.

[Anonymous No.7681397]

>>7681274
I'll take what is French onion for $500 Alex.

[Anonymous No.7681449]

>>7681393
>tfw Americlap
>tfw living in a state that isn't a flyover or Florida
>tfw the rest of the world lumps you in with all the degenerates from the irrelevant parts of your country

Feels bad man.

[Anonymous No.7681465]

>>7679715
>a hamburger can have too much meat
What the fuck am I even reading? Why don't you just kill yourself you fucking heathen?

[Anonymous No.7681487]

>>7679381
>seasoning meat with anything other than salt.

[Anonymous No.7681495]

>>7681487
I season meat with salt every night. By meat I mean "your mom" and by salt I mean "my semen".

[Anonymous No.7681500]

>>7681495
That's cool. Nice to know there's somebody willing to give her some even in her late 60s.

[Anonymous No.7681501]

>>7681500
You know what they say man, the older the cherry the sweeter the juice.

[Anonymous No.7681510]

>>7679381
>he eats both sides of the meat

[Anonymous No.7681628]

Stop putting gravy on everything, everyone else in the UK!

[Anonymous No.7681636]

>adding excessive amounts of cheese and bacon to dishes where they don't belong for the sake of being over-the-top and pandering to EpicMealTime-esque shitters
>retarded meme "pizzas" from pizza chains like "buffalo chicken pizza" or "fettucini alfredo pizza" bought by potheads with severe brain damage

[Anonymous No.7681642]

>>7679381
>oil splash onto shirt
>stains it like polka dots
>can never wear the shirt outside anymore

[Anonymous No.7681653]

>picky eaters
>home cooks who think they know better than people who've worked in the industry
>people who start threads like this
>anyone who buys into a fad diet
>people from isolated countries who can't understand that there's both variety and quality in first world countries
>picky eaters
>people who insist on being in the kitchen when they obviously don't know what they're doing because it's "their thing"
>people addicted to sugar
>people who say that other people only pretend to like a massively popular food just to fit in
>people who aren't willing to try anything twice
>children
>people who like burnt eggs
>people who use hot sauce as a crutch
>people who think hot sauce is only used as a crutch
>people who buy knife sets and don't learn how to take care of them
>people who pretend they have allergies as an excuse not to eat something like bread
>people who spout bullshit about the benefits of not eating meat, or any other food item that's responsible for the survival of our species, without any real understanding of what they're talking about
>picky eaters who convince themselves that they're going to throw up after trying a bite of something as mundane as a raw tomato
>/fit/ fags who read the sticky and then come here every day and ask how to make the most bland food in the world palatable to eat every day

[Anonymous No.7681657]

>>7681487
What?

Too weak to handle pepper?

Go back to Scandinavia, tasteless pussy.

[Anonymous No.7681661]

>setting food on counter to thaw all day
>microwaving on high to thaw
>cooking food 50degrees over the recommended temperature in oven
>complains the meat never turns out good

[Anonymous No.7681672]

>women saying that putting premade shit in the oven is "cooking"

[Anonymous No.7681714]

>>7681501
The blacker the berry...

[Anonymous No.7681726]

>>7681653
You should add to your list:
>people who think meat is an essential ingredient to every part of every meal

[Anonymous No.7681729]

>>7681653
pretty much this but also
>people who get butthurt about vegans/vegetarians
if they aren't jamming their beliefs down your throat you absolutely do not have to engage them about the benefits of eating meat.
also the "survival of our species" thing is bullshit, but other than that this guy is pretty spot on.

[Anonymous No.7681737]

>>7681726
I'm going to take a wild guess and say you're in an open relationship, have tattoos, facial piercings, a receding hairline, and a veganism blog.

[Anonymous No.7681738]

>>7681737
No
but it's common knowledge that meat is often used as a crutch in cooking

[Anonymous No.7681740]

>>7681230
if I'm not making a nice steak or something, I'm gonna cook meat right from the fridge, I don't want it sitting out and if I am just making like japanese curry I'm not gonna care how perfect the meat is.

[Anonymous No.7681749]

>>7681636
I don't know, I really have enjoyed meme pizza toppings unironically. It's not kale's fault that yuppies discovered baking it until crispy makes it delicious.

It is similar to a potato chip flavored with what tastes like pure chlorophyll. I just like it.

[Anonymous No.7681754]

>>7681449
>geuinely, unironically having hurt fee fees about how eurofags perceive you

These are the people that use 'flyover' as an insult.

[Anonymous No.7681759]

>>7681729
>>7681726
>people who think meat is an essential ingredient to every part of every meal

I love meat and only really have a problem with militant vegans who don't know what they're talking about, but I completely agree with this as well. There's absolutely no reason to have to have a chunk of meat at every meal.

Conversely, I do get annoyed by veggie people who think they eat a more varied diet than omnivores. I eat everything you do, but also eat all sorts of meats in addition to everything you enjoy.

[Anonymous No.7681760]

>>7681737
Not that guy, but I do have a healthy love of Indian food. I can accidentally go for weeks without eating meat if nobody else cooks.

Meat is delicious, but people who act like it's actually necessary tend to be the wrong kind of Americans.

[Anonymous No.7681762]

There is nothing wrong with only seasoning one side of meat

When you paint a wall you only paint one side
When you draw a picture you only draw on one side of the paper
When you design a shirt you only put the graphics on one side
When you wipe your skin you don't rip your skin off and fucking rub the sponge on the other side

The other side of the meat doesn't matter. You are ONLY eating from one side of the fucking meat and the seasoning seeps through the whole way anyway so taste isn't effected. In fact seasoning both sides causes them to dry out the meat because it needs unseasoned meat to store its moisture. (look at some with dry skin and you'll notice they are pale because they have in essence been 'seasoned')

[Anonymous No.7681772]

>>7681729

The "the survival of the species" thing is less about making an argument against going vegetarian, for example, and more about people all of a sudden claiming that bread is bad for you. If you want to go gluten free and it actually improves your health, so be it. But don't start making blanket statements about bread being unhealthy.

[Anonymous No.7681793]

>>7679715
>red wine to fish
Matelote says hi.

[Anonymous No.7681801]

>>7679804
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q84nfWkLsYU#t=0m23s

[Anonymous No.7681805]

>>7681762

How high are you?

[Anonymous No.7681810]

>>7681805
But he's right. Do you have a tongue on the roof of your mouth?

[Anonymous No.7681837]

>>7681810
Not really. Do you chew meat with your incisors?

[Anonymous No.7681857]

>>7681230
>breaking spaghetti in half for "even cooking"

I do this. I have a small pot.

[Anonymous No.7681858]

>>7681810
Yes.

[Anonymous No.7681916]

>>7679381
People who buy chef's knives that cost several hundered dollars/euros/whatever and:
1. Don't know how to take care of them properly
2. Have terrible knife skills
3. Don't cook for themselves often, but when they do, they cook incredibly simple things that necessitate under 10 knife strokes.

But at the same time it's their money so who gives a damn

[Anonymous No.7681917]

>>7681737
I guess you're one of those people who that guy was talking about.

[Anonymous No.7681938]

>>7681230
Can someone explain why margarine is bad, I'vs heard people bashing it before.
Seems like a good substitute for lactose intolerant individuals.

[Anonymous No.7681981]

>>7681938
I never got why people knock it so much as well. But, i have always thought that those people assume that everyone who uses margarine uses it to replace butter, which isn't always true. Margarine certainly has its place in baking, and as you said, its a decent enough substitute if you can't have lactose. But using it in recipes that warrant butter instead for no good reason is fucking sacrilege, which I think is what those people are on about

[Anonymous No.7682062]

>>7679781

Maybe your parents were more worried about raising and providing for you than impressing you with food. Holy shit man, kys, but make sure you apologize to your parents for being a shi son first

[Anonymous No.7682075]

>People who think being from a foreign country means they can automatically cook that country's cuisine like experts.
>People who think "family" recipes they learned as a child are infallible.
>People who add condiments to food before trying it.

[Anonymous No.7682086]

>>7682075
>>People who add condiments to food before trying it.

[Anonymous No.7682090]

>>7679715

there's lots of contexts in which red wine or cheese go with fish

kill yourself

[Anonymous No.7682092]

>>7682090
name a couple.

[Anonymous No.7682128]

>>7682092

red wines with softer tannin and lower iron content can go with almost any fish dish

there are many roasted fish dishes or fish dishes involving tomato or mushroom or sulphurous reduction based sauces that go extremely well with even heavier reds. this is especially true with oily fishes like mackerel, sardines, salmon.

there are many fish dishes that directly incorporate red wine as a poaching liquor or sauce base

as far as fish and cheese goes caesar salad is an obvious one, anchovies and well aged cheeses actually is a very common combination even within italy. salmon and cream cheese is ubiquitous. white fish 'viennoise' is a common preparation involving cheese and fish and even tomato.

both red wine and cheese are things that have a tremendous range in terms of flavour and texture. obviously not every cheese is gonna go with every fish but you're paying too much attention to your nonna if you say they never should meet

[Anonymous No.7682142]

I use margarine instead of butter because it is the cheap thing to do.

That is the only reason

Butter is expensive compared to margarine

[Anonymous No.7682145]

>>7679715
>complaining about a burger you ordered.

[Anonymous No.7682147]

>>7682075
I need some examples for the last one

Like if someone is giving me a chili dog I will always try to add mustard. I don't care how god based your chili is.

The opposite is for french fries. If you put ANYTHING on it other than salt I won't eat them. And I only use sea salt

[Anonymous No.7682150]

>>7682090

[Anonymous No.7682152]

>Square burgers

At least make the bun square too

[Anonymous No.7682194]

>>7682147
>Cook chicken fried rice for friend
>He's never had it before
>Smothers it in siracha before taking a single bite
why did he do that to me

[Anonymous No.7682267]

>>7681240
Baby clams, spinach, blue cheese and roasted garlic on a white pizza is fucking amazing.

[Anonymous No.7682312]

>>7679811
It's hit or miss with me, sometimes it will taste like soap and others it will taste like an herb.

[Anonymous No.7682315]

>>7682152
but you get to bite off the corners

[Anonymous No.7682350]

>>7679381
I went out with some acquaintances a week or so ago and he wouldn't get a crepe with us because he was on the paleo diet.

I was like, alright, I guess that's what you like, makes no fucking sense but ok.

After that we went and got tacos, and he asked them whether or not the sauce had sugar in it because he had ADHD.

What the fuck.

I hate it when people come up with dumb reasons they can't eat everything, is one fucking squirt of salsa really gonna make you spaz out? What kind of diet means you have to only eat meat? What health benefits could that possibly have?

Nice guy though.

[Anonymous No.7682365]

>>7681938
it's all oil. it's disgusting

[Anonymous No.7682410]

>>7682350

Paleo isn't meat only, it just cuts out all grains. You're supposed to eat nothing but meat, vegetables and fruit. It's still stupid and based on a very flawed understanding of nutrition and/or what our early ancestors ate but it's an improvement over even more stupid shit like Atkins. The idea is that heavy grain consumption is a relatively recent introduction to the human diet and it's not very good for us. This is bullshit, of course, but that's the argument.

But if he ate a taco he's fucking up.

[Anonymous No.7682434]

>>7682315
I'll bite off your corners, faggot

[Anonymous No.7682522]

>>7681636
I used to work for a gourmet pizza chain and our buffalo chicken pizza was tasty as hell. Buffalo chicken, gorgonzola, red onions, and celery and blue cheese after cooking. Fucken Tasty

[Anonymous No.7682525]

>>7682522
>gourmet pizza chain
>buffalo chicken pizza

[Anonymous No.7682546]

>go into a bar yesterday
>take a look at their beer menu
>without exaggeration, 70% of the beers available said "IPA", "Pale" or "extra hopped".
>guy next to me orders something
>"I'll take an IPA"
>"Sure bud, which one?"
>"I don't care just pick one for me"

I'm so fucking triggered over this IPA ultra bitter hop meme. If you partake in this clusterfuck I have nothing but autistic disdain for you.

[Anonymous No.7682566]

>>7679781

>butternut squash
>eggplant
>catfish

sounds like you weren't missing much... shit tier foods

[Anonymous No.7682576]

>>7680094

i always cut the bottom off and throw it in the trash because it has most likely absorbed the most mexican farmer feces

[Anonymous No.7682588]

>>7681449

faggot

[Anonymous No.7682592]

>>7681636

>buffalo chicken pizza is bad

[Anonymous No.7682593]

>>7682062
My mother is mentally ill and my father is a cocaine addict. I'm white but grew up in a ghetto with black neighbors. Don't assume every parent in the world deserves respect, asshole.

[Anonymous No.7682597]

>>7681661

had a hispanic chick as a room mate in college for a year. she would leave meat on the counter to thaw for 12+ hours before cooking it. sketchy as fuck. every meal was a pound of adobo seasoning with a bunch of avocados and some snarky remarks about gringos not understanding the complex and amazing flavors of a pound of adobo seasoning.

[Anonymous No.7682605]

>>7682546

>go to store last night
>pick 6 beers
>zero IPAs/hop bombs/licking bag of nickles
>lagers/ales/porter
>all 7%+ ABV
>all tasted great

fuck IPAs

[Anonymous No.7682644]

>>7682546
Fucking this.
People who claim they know loads about beer and when you attempt to have a conversation with them about it they just spout out a bunch of meme IPAs.

[Anonymous No.7682694]

>mozz'
>moozarell'
>'erbs
>people losing their shit when you call "pasta" noodles

[Anonymous No.7682704]

>>7679715
>hamburger without bacon
Simply disgusting.

[Anonymous No.7682721]

>>7681762
>You are ONLY eating from one side of the fucking meat
No?
Someone once complained where I work because the burgers weren't getting seasoning on both sides. Someone didn't season the meat patty after it was flipped. Some people just have stronger palettes than others. Not only that but once a bite of food is in your mouth you're gonna move it around a lot while you chew.

[Anonymous No.7682731]

>>7681230
>>7681653
>>7681672
>>7682075
>>7682546
All these

>>7681762
kek'd at this schizo idiot

[Anonymous No.7682732]

>people who dont know how to cook constantly giving you "advice or saying you should do something you were already doing

[Anonymous No.7682736]

>maxicans who get ass blasted at any place selling mexican food complaining that its not real mexican food
who cares its fucking inspired and you cant even cook it so fuck off faggots

[Anonymous No.7682745]

I want to post memes about family members not cleaning up and eating takeaway when there's food in the fridge, but I feel like this is the wrong thread for that.

[Anonymous No.7682753]

>>7682745
they're not called "memes" you jackass newfag

[Anonymous No.7682756]

>>7679801
but it's so cheap, they practically make you buy three bushels at the store.

[Anonymous No.7682793]

>servers
>servers, on expo

[Anonymous No.7682847]

>>7682566
Butternut Squash and Catfish aren't shit tier, they're just not great.
Aubergine is a fucking god-tier vegetable

[Anonymous No.7682850]

when people confus grilling and pan frying

[Anonymous No.7682854]

>>7679872
The gene does not mean you can taste better in general , it just means that you have certain receptors that bind with certain chemicals in the coriander that create the soapy taste. You are both wrong.

[Anonymous No.7682865]

>People who say eating healthy is expensive
>And then proceed to either showcase 30$ worth of fruit or show that they can minmax calories by drinking oil.

[Anonymous No.7682868]

>>7682854
>you have certain receptors that bind with certain chemicals in the coriander

In other words, he has a sense of taste that many other people don't have. That's clearly "better", though perhaps marginally so. N+1 > N.

[Anonymous No.7682869]

>>7682793

>servers, on expo

Industry shit is a whole different thread, but yeah, servers who don't understand the timing of the kitchen demanding things or pretty much doing anything at all can be infuriating.

[Anonymous No.7682873]

>>7682868
>Tfw I taste cilantro as soap
It's been getting better as I force myself to eat it. Now I taste it as lime scented soap.

[Anonymous No.7682906]

People who cannot fathom a side dish that isn't fucking fries.
My parents have fries with every meal. EVERY meal. It doesn't matter what it is. They have a pizza? They have some fries. They have soup? They have fries. They have Subway? They go to McDonalds and get some fries. Its fucking baffling. They usually cook my dinner uninvited when I am at work so I tried to tell them I don't like fries. They went out and bought Potato Wedges and Curly Fries. In my moms words 'curly fries aren't fries just like springs ain't strings!'.

Also they have to be potato fries. I tried making them sweet potato fries as a treat once and they spat them out.

[Anonymous No.7682935]

>>7681857
It's called broken pasta and it's a thing. That guy is a pleb.

[Anonymous No.7682943]

>>7681653
>people who spout bullshit about the benefits of not eating meat
???

[Anonymous No.7682960]

>>7682943

>people who spout bullshit

Hey look, I can take something out of context too!

[Anonymous No.7682984]

>>7682868
Yeah but those receptors are useless in everything else except making coriander taste like soap. Id say thats pretty shit

[Anonymous No.7682988]

>>7682592
You have shit taste and should fuck off from the cooking board back to /r9k/ if you think buffalo pizza is good.

[Anonymous No.7683000]

>>7682745
And going to the store to buy more ingredients for yet another pot of food they want to cook, even though there are unused ingredients in the fridge already, not to mention half eaten pots of food?? Same here bro.

[Anonymous No.7683022]

>>7682906
Sounds like your parents are related

[Anonymous No.7683136]

>>7679715
>>7681274
What about beer cheese soup? Checkmate cu/ck/s

[Anonymous No.7683413]

>>7682906
Are your parents irish inbreds living in USA?

[Anonymous No.7683421]

>>7682593

>things that never happened

[Anonymous No.7683433]

>>7682906

>I tried making them sweet potato fries as a treat once and they spat them out.

This is entirely the correct response to sweet potato fries.

[Anonymous No.7683545]

>>7680120
why would you add sticks to food? I just burn them in my fireplace

[Anonymous No.7683551]

>>7679949
>not calling it Chinese parsley

[Anonymous No.7683556]

>>7682854
>>7682868
>>7682873
>>7682984

actually i believe that the people who *like* coriander are supposed to have more receptors, making the flavour of the herb more balanced and palatable.

but either way the whole 'if you don't like it's genetic' thing is a total meme. some people will be genetically predisposed to dislike it, that does not mean they are destined to it. Personally i like coriander and also agree that it tastes like soap.

[Anonymous No.7683566]

>>7683433
this

[Anonymous No.7683571]

>>7681653
>>home cooks who think they know better than people who've worked in the industry

so, you're a minimum wage line cook that knows everything because you're in the 'industry'

[Anonymous No.7683589]

I hate picky eaters who act like spoilt 5 year old children.
Also people who squirm at a steak just because it's medium rare.
Also people who act like a wine taster when trying anything new.

[Anonymous No.7683605]

People who start eating before I've fucking sat down.

I cooked the bloody meal. You will wait until I have finished preparations and am ready to start. You do not need to pick at anything with your hands, Sophie, you ungrateful bitch.

[Anonymous No.7683609]

>>7683571

You learn cooking through repetition, just like anything else.

Who do think is going to know better: someone who cooks a meal at home every night, or someone who cooks 365 meals every night in a restaurant kitchen surrounded by people who've been doing it for years?

[Anonymous No.7683686]

>>7683433
Top tier Sweet potato fries are better than regular fries.
But they are so easy to fuck up.

[Anonymous No.7683695]

>>7681274
Potato leek soup.

[Anonymous No.7683706]

>>7682593
So with that in mind, you still criticize their cooking?

[Anonymous No.7683712]

>>7683545
Fuck off.

[Anonymous No.7683723]

>>7681371
I don't get why people can't say fucking "savoury"

[Anonymous No.7683724]

>>7683545
I chuckled

[Anonymous No.7683750]

>>7680122
>>7679949
why do people post captain mc cunt face when they are trying to make a point? wont it just make everyone want to punch their face instead of listen to them?

[Anonymous No.7683758]

>>7683723

because that would be changing the definition of the word 'savoury'. we didn't have a word for umami before it was discovered. 'savoury' is only a vague gesture in its direction, and it can mean other things.

[Anonymous No.7683763]

>>7683750
>this coming from an animeposter

[Anonymous No.7683766]

>>7683758
Still a damn sight better than looking like some sort of weeb anytime you want to mention it.

[Anonymous No.7683785]

>>7683766

the thing about life outside the internet is people won't think you're a weeb if you don't dress and groom yourself like one. that way you get to have opinions that aren't limited by a fear of nationalistic stereotyping.

[Anonymous No.7683908]

>>7681338

[Anonymous No.7684212]

>>7679781
Yeah I know what you mean, I'm the only one in the family that learned how to cook, and that's only because my first job as a teenager was in a restaurant and one of the cooks took me under his wing.

Was recently in town visiting and decided to take a request from each of my parents and cook it for them. My father wanted chicken parm and my mother wanted Salisbury steak. About as simple as it gets, and they raved about the fact that I made homemade sauce for the chicken and a pan gravy for the ground beef. Acted like it was the best meal they'd had in ages. Honestly feels bad that that eat like such crap all the time that these are mind blowing meals for them. They were good to me, I want better for my parents

[Anonymous No.7685676]

>>7682194
>"why did he do thay to me?

Did he grab it form the fridge or was it on the table? If it was on the table, gu ess what? You did it to yourself.

[Anonymous No.7685682]

>>7683706
Why wouldn't he? Being mentally ill or a cocaine addict doesn't excuse your bad cooking. Just like being Asian doesn't excuse your bad driving. You don't drive porly because you're Asian, you drive poorly because you're a dickhead and you don't care.

[Anonymous No.7685684]

>>7685682

>Being mentally ill or a cocaine addict doesn't excuse your bad cooking.

oh my god 4chan will you shut the fuck up

[Anonymous No.7685698]

Not so much cooking as kitchen related. When someone takes a sponge to a plate where the food is clearly still caked on thickly. A sponge is a polishing tool, not a general scraper.

[Anonymous No.7685715]

>>7679381
Oh, is this the Autism thread?

Sorry boys but I don't have anything to donate today.

[Anonymous No.7685722]

>>7685682
>Being mentally ill or a cocaine addict doesn't excuse your bad cooking
Is there some kind of coke-using schizo chief running around shitting out Beef wellington?

[Anonymous No.7685730]

>>7685722

you tell me

[Anonymous No.7685840]

>>7681762
You type like homeless men at bus stops yell.

[Anonymous No.7685845]

>>7681762
>and the seasoning seeps through the whole way anyway so taste isn't effected.

this is the only pertinent statement in your post and it isn't really true.

> In fact seasoning both sides causes them to dry out the meat because it needs unseasoned meat to store its moisture

seasoned meat actually has better water retention than unseasoned meat, this is how brining works.

[Anonymous No.7685851]

>>7682546
Perhaps the average drinker wants something more than the same beer in different branding?

There is almost no difference between mass marketed lagers.

[Anonymous No.7685864]

>>7683609
Depends on the meal, i'd wager that the breadth of dishes and technical knowledge of a restaurant chef mean that they would likely outperform the average home cook on almost every dish.

But the average cook might have one dish that they can cook better than the professional simply because they've cooked it far more.

>little old indian lady will certainly make better curries than Guy Fieri

[Anonymous No.7685879]

>>7685722
Anthony Bourdain

[Anonymous No.7686001]

>butter

[Anonymous No.7686165]

>>7685879
Fuknkekd

[Anonymous No.7686166]

>>7679715
French onion soup m80

[Anonymous No.7686191]

>>7682988
Climb down off your high horse and make me, bitch nigga

[Anonymous No.7686201]

Sandwiches that are impossible to eat without unhinging your jaw.

[Anonymous No.7686227]

>>7679381
>Autism General.

[Anonymous No.7686231]

>>7685682
>Being mentally ill or a cocaine addict doesn't excuse your bad cooking

[Anonymous No.7686232]

>>7681279
>best
>infographs
Pick one.

[Anonymous No.7686242]

>>7681714
Yeah, well she blacker than a motherfucker too...

[Anonymous No.7686386]

>>7686201
>>>sawing with a straight edged knife

>people who put their finger on the spine of the knife
>people who flip steaks more than four times
>people who cut into steaks "just to check"
>the new guy that hovers over your shoulder all day then asks you to make him food at the end of his shift

[Anonymous No.7686396]

>>7685682
>Why wouldn't he? Being mentally ill or a cocaine addict doesn't excuse your bad cooking. Just like being Asian doesn't excuse your bad driving. You don't drive porly because you're Asian, you drive poorly because you're a dickhead and you don't care.
Sorry, Asian people are clearly bad drivers because they are Asian.

[Anonymous No.7686408]

>>7682906
On a scale of Joey to a dwarf star, how obese are your parents?

[syn !!5auGoPfbzhy No.7686506]

>>7679381
>>seasoning only one side of the meat

Try searing only one side of the meat. On the other hand, a Bolivian housekeeper once tried to 'flip' my chocolate chip cookies as they were baking... good intentions.

Also:
>I don't eat seafood.
>I take crispy, tasty skin off of my fish.

>>7679949
>>7680122
>Nation with shittiest cuisine telling us what's what in the herb garden.

It's not used in curry and therefor is no longer of concern to you.

>>7681628
>Stop putting gravy on everything, everyone else in the UK!
How else are they supposed to hide what's under?

>>7681657
>Too weak to handle pepper?
>Go back to Scandinavia, tasteless pussy

Hello flyover retard. Pepper isn't seasoning. Pepper is a spice. Salt is the only seasoning.

>>7681760
>act like it's actually necessary tend to be the wrong kind of Americans

We're the only American's, you stupid cuck. Go hand daughter over to ISIS rape time to atone for your cis gendered privilege.

[Anonymous No.7686669]

>>7682128
I learned things today. Thanks, anon.

[Anonymous No.7686690]

>>7679381
>eat pasta at a restaurant
>it comes overcooked and drowning in sauce

Please just cook it al dente and coat it very lightly

[Anonymous No.7686694]

>>7686506
You literally got cucked out of using the word coriander by the influx of spic immigrants in the US who use the word cilantro. Pathetic. Also, the word sounds like a cleaning product

And the 'le British food is shit' meme is a bit tired and hackneyed by now. The average Brit eats as good as if not better than the average yank, and our best restaurants blow yours out of the fucking water

[Anonymous No.7686696]

>>7679381
Americans who bash british cuisine to no end and then eat culinary abominations

[Anonymous No.7686700]

>>7686694
>And the 'le British food is shit' meme is a bit tired and hackneyed by now. The average Brit eats as good as if not better than the average yank, and our best restaurants blow yours out of the fucking water

FUCKING THIIIS

[Anonymous No.7686841]

>classic
>rustic
>artisan
>humble
>nouveau
>"just like mama used to make"
>referring to your own food as "delicious" on the menu
>pictures of food on the menu

[Anonymous No.7686853]

>>7686694
>>7686696
>>7686700
This is one buttblasted brit

[Anonymous No.7686901]

>>7686853
Correction- 2 buttblasted brits haha

[Anonymous No.7686913]

>>7686841
did someone say
R U S T I C
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EcJOmWCdLBs

[Anonymous No.7686950]

My biggest pet peeve is when people refuse to try new things because they didn't like it years and years ago.

"Oh, I tried that as a kid and didn't like it. No thanks!"

You were 5 then and you're 22 now. Just put the fucking brussel sprout in your damn mouth, jesus christ. You'll like the butter sauce, believe me.

[Anonymous No.7686965]

>>7681274
Any milk-based soup would go well with cheese

clam chowder, potato, etc

[Anonymous No.7686979]

>>7683695
this. oh god this
especially if you crumble some bacon and ham into it. fuck, my mouth is watering just thinking about it

[Anonymous No.7686984]

>>7686950
Fuck you brussel sprouts are gross

[Anonymous No.7687006]

>>7686984
TRY THEM WITH BUTTER SAUCE YOU FUCKING BABY

[Anonymous No.7687008]

>>7686984
literal child detected

[Anonymous No.7687014]

>boiling anything, pasta, vegetables etc. beyond al dente
>people who actually prefer it like this

[Anonymous No.7687046]

>>7685722

Probably a lot more than you'd think

[Anonymous No.7687059]

>>7686984
you don't even need a fucking butter sauce.

just roast it with olive oil, salt and cracked pepper. don't be a baby. just try it again.

[Anonymous No.7687064]

>>7687006
>>7687008
I wish I loved eating what tastes like a nazis armpit but I don't. Just back off you're not helping.

[Anonymous No.7687075]

>>7687064
>doesn't like the taste of butter
so you're just retarded then

[Anonymous No.7687091]

>>7687075
You can't cover shit with butter and make it good co/ck/sucker

[Anonymous No.7687106]

>>7687091
actually try brussel sprouts with butter sauce and get back to me

Green Giant has them in little microwaveable steam packs

[Anonymous No.7687127]

>>7687014
>tfw mom cooks broccoli until it's a mush

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOEEEEEEEEE

[Anonymous No.7687140]

>>7687106
I'll over cook them to trigger >>7687014

[Anonymous No.7687220]

>>7680203
That's some Condorito shit righ there.

[Anonymous No.7687230]

>>7679781
Grew up in America, and this was definitely not my situation. My parents were really good cooks and made a wide variety of different foods. I don't think this is an "American" thing, it depends on the type of person you are

[syn !!5auGoPfbzhy No.7688127]

>>7686694
>spic immigrants in the US who use the word cilantro

Both words are rooted in Latin, but by either term is it not common to the bland peasant rations of contemporary Britbong cuisine.

But because of our cultural superiority, we have adopted both terms for purpose of clarity. Coriander is the seed, cilantro is the plant.

We also have another herb in our toolbox that makes us superior to you - culantro.

>The average Brit eats as good as if not better

Apart from your 1%ers in the ISIS-occupied city of Londonistan, everything you eat comes in a plastic tub that you microwave or is pic related.

The prosecution rests.

[syn !!5auGoPfbzhy No.7688145]

>>7686950
>>7687006

Don't your kind have a containment board of your own?

[Anonymous No.7688156]

>>7688145
i just like pictures of cute dogs, jesus christ, tripfag

[Anonymous No.7688163]

>>7682152
>whining about extra meat corners
Faggot

[Anonymous No.7688196]

>Dull knives
>Serrated steak knives
>Using the wrong knife for a job
>Bad table manners
>Not knowing the difference between good food and bad food

The first one in particular tends to make me sperg out. I keep all of my knives immaculate and shaving-sharp and I don't know that there's anything more obnoxious than going to a friend's house to cook only to find that their knives have essentially been reduced to blunt instruments and that said friends don't even own a sharpening stone.

[Anonymous No.7688218]

my mum has this thing where she loves junk food and eats it all the time, but when cooking she never uses butter or salt because she thinks its unhealthy, then wonders why she finds it so hard to eat anything that's not delicious salty fatty junk food. I mean you don't have to drown food in salt and better to make it super tasty and a little bit of both is still healthy.

[Anonymous No.7688220]

>>7686694
We use the word cilantro because only spics cook with cilantro because it's disgusting.

It's always hilarious hearing britfags whining about random US english word differences.

[Anonymous No.7688222]

>>7681230
>breaking spaghetti in half
I hate it when people do this.
You can't twirl it around a fork.
You can't properly drain it.
It's just so fucking awful.

[Anonymous No.7688225]

>>7682605
iktfb

>Not living five minutes away from the biggest beer cave in Colorado
Feels real fucking good, man. I've been getting into ciders lately and they have more than three dozen.

[Anonymous No.7688233]

>cooking some rice
>pour water in
>give it a quick stir
>housemate gets mad at me saying stirring the rice will cause it to "knot"
>won't explain what he means and always gets mad if I stir rice

[Anonymous No.7688239]

>>7688233
Keep stirring it, fuck him.

[Anonymous No.7688256]

>>7688233
My best mate tells me it will cut the rice whenever we cook together; that rice is made up of individual small grains seems to not dissuade him from this belief. I've told him to just get a rice cooker already, but he absolutely refuses because it's unnecessary, and because he doesn't stir he ends up with burned rice on the bottom of the pot every time.

[Anonymous No.7688258]

>>7679715
Potato cheese soup would like a word.

[Anonymous No.7688261]

>>7688256
Absolutely disgusting.

[Anonymous No.7688272]

>>7688256
buying a rice cooker is a great idea, even though I usually hate the idea of single use items in the kitchen. perfect rice every time with zero effort and they are very cheap.

[Anonymous No.7688276]

>>7686242

[Anonymous No.7688292]

>>7681230
Who the fuck is stupid enough to BOIL lasagna sheets?

[Anonymous No.7688295]

>>7686506
>trip
>replying to all of those at once for guaranteed (you)s
Please drown yourself.

[Anonymous No.7688304]

>>7681653
>people who say that other people only pretend to like a massively popular food just to fit in
>anyone who buys into a fad diet
So you hate yourself?

[Anonymous No.7688318]

>>7681309
>be on /v/
>90% of everyone 'preferring' steak well done
>"enjoy your worms"
>"ew it looks uncooked that's nasty"

Literally being the stereotype. Probably think 2 dollar ramen is exotic.

[Anonymous No.7688319]

Anyone over the age of twelve that outright refuses to eat "veggies."
Jason just eat a fucking piece of broccoli for fuck's sake. And no, marinara is not a veggie paste you dense cunt.

[Anonymous No.7688370]

>>7688319
Thirteen year old detected

[Anonymous No.7688430]

>>7679381
ahh
where do I start
> cookbooks by supposed "professionals" which dumb recipes down to the point of being useless
> any dumb cunt who uses volume to measure solids
> cunts who can't cook at all. it's pathetic, it's like not being able to tie your own fucking shoelaces, or not knowing how to brush your teef
> cunts who do things "just because", without thinking of what they are doing, why, and how. 1 HOUR MARINADE ON THICK CUTS DOES NOTHING, YOU DUMB FUCKS.

[Anonymous No.7688453]

>>7682142
when you factor in the cost of heart medication, it's quite a bit cheaper actually

[Anonymous No.7688616]

>>7683763
>complaining about anime
>on anime imageboard
>imageboard cloned from a japanese imageboard

nys

[Anonymous No.7688628]

>>7688233
>>housemate gets mad at me saying stirring the rice will cause it to "knot"
I know people who mix-up rice and pasta cooking ("créole"/French colonies style rice cooking (excess water and colander/strainer) is more common than pilaf (water evaporation) here), since they are similar.
Spaghetti could knot, but that's already a aspie thing to not stir pasta because of knots.
Not stirring rice in pilaf cooking is a thing though, if you want it to stick enough to be eaten with chopsticks for example. Not with risotto of course.

[Anonymous No.7688641]

>>7688430
>overmarinating thick cuts of meat because he couldn't afford the good meat
>lauginggirls.png

but seriously though bruh, a marinade much like seasoning isn't meant to flavor throughout, but rather to provide an accentuation to the meat

[Anonymous No.7688737]

>>7688127
Amazing that you took the time to write out all that, being completely wrong on every single point
You clearly know fuck all about Britain beyond entry-level /int/ and /ck/ memes, so why bother sharing your opinions with us?

[Anonymous No.7688741]

>>7688616
Oh right, I didn't realise this was the food & cooking & anime board

[Anonymous No.7688809]

>>7688233
No idea about knots but you shouldn't stir your rice unless it's risotto cause it breaks the grains (which releases starch) and turns it to mush. Leave it totally alone until it absorbs the water, it only burns if you leave it too long

[Anonymous No.7688827]

>>7688809
A stir here and there is not going to turn it into mush.

[Anonymous No.7688846]

>using a shitload of crushed red pepper in a dry rub
shiggydiggydoo

[Anonymous No.7688904]

>>7688196

>Serrated steak knives

oh god

i just don't understand why people do this, you just end up pre-masticating the fucking steak, any open textured cut is just gonna be dragged to shit and if it's underrested as well it's like a particularly gruesome scene from akira

[Anonymous No.7688912]

>>7688233
>>7688256

if you stir rice you can burst and dissolve the starch granules, breaking the grains up and causing it to go gluey.

[Anonymous No.7689060]

>>7688127
Fantastic. You managed to make two words that mean the same thing mean 2 different things.

It would be closer to the truth to say that about americans but generalisations are for ignorant cunts. There are good cooks and bad cooks in every country. Everyone I know makes their own food, but im sure there are 100 people who just eat takeaway food and readymeals for every one of them. Im sure its the same in every country. It's also ignorant to think that the only people who eat well and the only place to get decent food is in London. I live hundereds of miles away from london and i live within an hour's drive of 5 michelin star restaurants, and countless amazing independent restaurants, too.

[Anonymous No.7689087]

>>7688127

i always like to imagine americans and insecure members of the commonwealth poring over the daily mail and other shock tabloid pap for a brief and tenuous sensation of triumph over the UK