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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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7462904 No.7462904 [Reply] [Original]

>be Australia
>"leave at room temperature"
>actually leave at room temperature
>RIP whatever you were trying to make

>> No.7462919

bread dries out when rising
salads and greens die
toffee's and the like goes soft
forget about ice cream mochi
your freezer starts to leak

can't deal

>> No.7462925

Always briefly refrigerate red wine before consumption. The "room temperature" thing was not meant for our continent.

>> No.7462930

>be not America
>"leave at freezing"
>actually leave at 32 degrees
>RIP whatever you were trying to make

>> No.7462957

>>7462925
That makes a lot of sense actually.

>> No.7462966

>be Australia
>"leave at room temperature"
>actually leave at room temperature
>how am I supposed to cook when all my equipment is back home

>> No.7462970

>he doesn't live in Tasmania

>> No.7462978

>>7462970
how many toes do you have (the ones on your feet)

>> No.7462979

>>7462978
I'll have you know I have 11 toes just like any normal Australian.

>> No.7462985

got so hot in my friends house that his entire fridge melted while he was at work

it re-froze again and he didn't notice

gave everyone food poisoning

>> No.7463003

update:

cooked bread anyway to see what would happen

it turned into a rock, to hard to cut with a knife
my global breadknife had the effect of a metal file, merely scratching the surface of the crust

laughably mishapen, this bread is now making cracking noises as it cools, like a meteor or volcanic boulder

when I smashed the bread with the hammer to reveal the inside, it was remarkably well textured, but sour

>> No.7463007

>>7462979
How did you lose the twelfth?

>> No.7463010

>>7462904
I have to store bread in the freezer because the 40 degree weather will make it mouldy literally the next day

>> No.7463015

>>7462904
I have to eat ice cream within a minute of removing it from the freezer or else it will start evaporating.

>> No.7463023
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7463023

No real Australian is posting in this thread we all know they don't have electricity or internet down under

>> No.7463027

>>7462919
So much this.
>try to be cool and fedora like the Brits and down a warm beer.
>It's 36 degrees outside
>The beer looks like it's fermenting for the second time

Never again.

>> No.7463028

>>7463023
>implying their internet and electricity isnt powered by pure shitposting

>> No.7463030

>>7463007
You are too brilliant to be Australian.

>> No.7463037
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7463037

>>7463023
Check mate, atheists.

>> No.7463040

>>7463037

Prove you're Australian.

No, that letter doesn't prove anything.

>> No.7463041

>>7463023
cunt I am litterally calling bigpond yelling at some indian cunt who clams his name is john who's tryint to make me less mad about our dropout rate

>> No.7463046

>>7463023
We have electricity. You're right about internet since the Liberals ruined it.

>> No.7463048
File: 122 KB, 804x981, Maccas.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7463048

>>7463040
I got Maccas earlier.

>> No.7463052

>>7463041
I didn't care so much a few years ago when the Indians actually spoke English, but now it's fucking retard-English.
I don't understand them, they don't understand me and yet THEY get annoyed at us!?

>> No.7463056

>>7463015
When I buy icecream I narrowly avoid several car accidents just getting it home before it turns into sugary milk soup. It doesn't help that everyone drives on the wrong side of the road the fucking poofters.

>> No.7463078

>fill kettle from tap
>kettle melts
So sick of being in Australia, to be honest.

>> No.7463083
File: 143 KB, 424x301, Pedro learned the wifi password.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7463083

>>7462904
>be Mexico
>trying to make some mole poblano with side steak as tradition
>leave at room temperature
>chill, waiting for steak and chiles to chill out
>get stabbed by some cholo pleblord named Paco el stabo
>procced to get ganged by cholo gang
>drug cartel shoots at my casa cause they think i'm related to some cop
> get my taxes money stolen by goverment
>procced to prepare mole and side steak medium rare
feelsgoodman.jpg

>> No.7463093

>>7463078
>buy brand new freezer from Harvey Norman in Moree, a short 112km drive
>plug has melted on the way back to Goondiwindi

>> No.7463098

>>7463046
>Muh Liberals ruined the internet meme

niga plz, go ingest a bowl of salt

>> No.7463222

>>7463093
Lotta coons in Moree, useless cunts

>> No.7463999

>>7463037
How much does 4chan mail cost?

>> No.7464005

>be in australia
>order steak
>literally taste of nothing
>australian beer with meal
>so cold that it tastes of nothing too

the only memorable food I had there was a crocodile kebab.

>> No.7464013

>Be in Australia
>$5 steak night - how can they do this I must see for myself
>you get what you pay for

Should has gotten the schnitzel. They are good at that.

>> No.7465447
File: 1003 KB, 1037x1248, 1456013800188.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7465447

>>7462925
And add, 5 ice cubes and a dash of fanta.

AWOOOOOOOOO

>> No.7465458

Is Australia really so backwards that they don't have air conditioning to maintain reasonable room temperatures while indoors?

>> No.7465470

>>7465458
This is a country that had to air PSAs telling people not to sleep on the road. What do you think?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qClBRaretEk

>> No.7465476

>>7465458
That's a really bad habit to get into. It leaves your body unable to regulate its internal temperature effectively. Pretty stupid thing to do just so your butter won't melt.

>> No.7465513

>>7465470

>abos
>people

>> No.7465517

>be 4pm on a saturday
>decide at the last minute you want some meat from the freezer for dinner
>take it out and put it on the kitchen bench
>it's completely thawed by 6pm and ready to cook

Wew lads I love this country

>> No.7465556
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7465556

Australia a shit.

>> No.7465566

Soak a tea towel in cold water and cover your resting dough ya daft cunt.

>> No.7465569
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7465569

Why are so many internet trolls from Australia? Is it the heat? The daedra wildlife? The anti Indian "shitting aisle" trolling is mostly Australians

>> No.7465581

>>7465556
why is chocolate milk flowing out of a toilet bowl?

>> No.7465583

>>7465569

They tend to drink alot...

>> No.7465663

>>7463048
Don't take bait, son. We taught you this a long time ago.

>> No.7465676

Anyone here have the webm of the Australian shitposter dancing for the rest of the countries?

>> No.7465683

>>7465676
ask /int/, they'll hook u up faster than what it takes your post to be downloaded and seen by any aussie

>> No.7465704
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7465704

>>7465676

>> No.7465729

>>7462919
p. solid poem

>> No.7465744

>>7465583
So you understand the world through stereotypes?

Crossing the fingers for drumpf aren't you?

>> No.7465748
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7465748

>> No.7465752
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7465752

>> No.7465771

> be in canada
> leave butter at room temp
> it never softens

>> No.7465780

>>7465771
>german humor

>> No.7465835

>>7465752
I haven't had a Chiko roll in ages. Good shit.

>> No.7465880

>>7465704

my nigga

>> No.7465889
File: 81 KB, 800x600, 1878541-spider_daedra[1].jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7465889

>>7465569
>daedra wildlife

>> No.7465891

>>7463048
I went to Alex Hills and lived at Capalaba

I have unironically been to that macca's

>> No.7465906

>>7465583
>>7465744
we do drink a lot.

also shitposting is part of our culture, it's like a culture of pathological liars that back each other's lies up. glorious nation/10

>> No.7465919

>>7465906
That makes sense.

I guess that's what happens when your country is founded as a prison colony.

>> No.7465950
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7465950

>>7463048
>capalaba
redland filth

>> No.7465953
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7465953

>>7465889
Almost trips there bucko, I can dig it.

>> No.7465962

>Be Germany
>Froth on top of coffee begins to form a swastika
>Go to gaol

>At reform school after prison
>Teacher asks a question
>Raise arm
>Back to gaol

>> No.7466141

>>7465569
We have a culture of 'banter' I literally spend the majority of my time with friends insulting each other

>> No.7466175

>>7463048
Are any crocs in Tingalpa Reservoir?

>> No.7466180

>>7465889
Don't you ever talk to me or my daughter again.

>> No.7466184

>>7466175
Few bull sharks in Thorneside too.

>>7465950
At least it's not Logan.

>> No.7466320

>>7465470
>people

>> No.7466330

>>7465569
our internet is shit so consuming online media is difficult, so we stick to text-based stuff

>> No.7466337

>>7465704
Fuck, that's brilliant!

>> No.7466428

>>7465447
>fanta
nah m8 fruit cup cordial

>> No.7466491

>>7465771
>visit Montréal
>buy milk
>milk is offended that I use the english name
>le lait turns sour and curdles instantly

>> No.7466494

>>7465569
Outside of 4chan, every Australian I've met online has been cordial and good-natured.

>> No.7466511
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7466511

fairy bread

>> No.7466514

>>7466511

All the grass around the food looks like it's dying rapidly.

>> No.7466529

>be from Cleveland
>have coconut bars
>find out they originated in Australia as Lamington
huh

>> No.7466540

>>7466494
We just have some fucked up humour, it's impossible to explain.

>> No.7466551

>>7464005
cant speak for the steak but you probably got some mass domestic beer. it's nearly all garbage.

>> No.7466558

>>7466494
>outisde of 4chan

so why are you surprised

>> No.7466560

>>7466511
I don't really care about the fairy bread but that paella with mussels and tiger prawns with the shells still on and shitty intestine still present

>> No.7466601
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7466601

>>7463098
>work in NBN
>know exactly how much slower and less cost effective the FTTN is than FTTP
>contracted budget for FTTN finally expires and we begin work on FTTN
>work no longer involves getting yelled at by old ladies about how telstra threatened to cut their lines (i'm fucking contracted to the gov) or how the civil team fucked their garden (pack of indians who do it before we even get the schedule) or digging through someone's shit house to run the cable
>work is good clean by the book installation node to node with little bogan interaction
>it's fucking slower internet but a cushier job
Fuck.
This wouldn't be a big deal if I wasn't busy hooking up old farmer dickfuck and his daughter/wife out woopwoop with the best shit while my own house stays ADSL2+ until the fucking changeover occurred.

>> No.7466607

Is Australia as humid as Florida? I live in South FL and it's hot and muggy as fuck. I want one of those outdoor kitchens but I would only be able to use it for like two months out of the year.

>> No.7466614

>>7466607
Depends.
Inland is fucking desert winds even on the plains, but over the mountains and by the sea it gets pretty muggy.

>> No.7466620

>>7466601
*contracted budget for FTTP

>> No.7466629

are there aboriginal restaurants in australia?

>> No.7466641

>>7466629
I've never seen one

What would they even sell? Kangaroo or damper cooked in an earth oven?

>> No.7466642

>>7466511
I'd butt-head her beavis, if you know what I mean

>> No.7466650

>>7466629
Nah, the world is watching us now so we have to treat them like 'people'.
Too fucken stringy and petrol-stained to eat anyway.

>> No.7466653
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7466653

>>7466641
There's actually an archaeological term for the piles of beer cans

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Midden

>> No.7466655

>>7466614
Oh wow I didn't even know Australia had mountains.

>> No.7466656

>>7466655
Most of them a fuckoff big hills, but we have a few that snow a couple months of the year.
The ranges are the reason the south and east coast of straya aren't as fucking deserted as the west.

>> No.7466658

>>7466653
kek

>> No.7466661
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7466661

>>7462904
>eat one of these

>> No.7466766
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7466766

>>7466529

this is great. All you need now is decent meat pies.

>> No.7466773

>>7466514

thats just regular grass m8 r u avin a fucking go at our grass m8?

>> No.7466777

>>7466773

based cooch

>> No.7466781

>>7462970
Too much uv, end up looking british

>> No.7466803

>>7466629
Aboriginal people dont really have dishes, its just cooked mean and bread

>> No.7466816

>>7466766
Yeah but it's not like they're Australian.

>> No.7466825

>living on prison island
>current year

>> No.7466854

>>7466825
Serious criminals were just hanged. It was petty thieves, drunks and mild sex criminals that were sent to Australia

>> No.7466861
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7466861

>>7466854
>mild sex criminals
What's a mild sex criminal?

>> No.7466891

>>7466854
pretty much. straya gets a bad rap for being a prison colony but really most of the "criminals" were just unwanted british citizens that they were looking for any excuse to get rid of as a population control measure so they made a bunch of bullshit laws to arrest people over. I think at one point homelessness was considered a crime

>>7466861
Low impact sexual violence instead of high impact

>> No.7466895

>>7466861
in the 19th century, rape.

>> No.7466915

>>7466629

no, in the same way there isnt neanderthal restaurants