Easy British recipes?

[Anonymous No.7447584]

Can some Britbongs give me some food recipes that are easy to craft? I've personally never tasted your food and I would like to try some, if possible.

[Anonymous No.7447590]

>>7447584
They have no culture, thus no traditional dishes

[Anonymous No.7447591]

>>7447584
>>7447584
Brits are a bit of a pie culture . . . .google steak and kidney pie, or better still, steak and kidney pudding! (it's like a pie but with suet pastry).

Or look for recipes involving a Cornish pasty, serve with chips and peas.

This is as easy at it gets.

[Anonymous No.7447606]

>>7447584
Britbong food used to be very similar to French food but took a lot longer to recover after WW2. Hence the memes about British food being full of austerity.

They do like their Sunday Roasts, which is usually beef or chicken, served with English mustard or Horseradish.

They also have great puddings, might be a bit of a meme but check out spotted dick or upside-down pineapple cake, or rhubarb crumble.

[Anonymous No.7447632]

Baked beans on toast
Chips and gravy
Crumpets

[Anonymous No.7447669]

yorkshire pudding
all sorts of savory pies
all sorts of roasts with root veggies to the side
fish and chips

all of this relatively easy

[Anonymous No.7447789]

>>7447584
just eat from your dog's food bowl

its be the same, if not better tasting

[Anonymous No.7447805]

>>7447789
I wonder how shit your life must be to obsess over a foreign country on an anime website

[Anonymous No.7447823]

Look up "Win the war" it's a british cookbook for the british people in ww1 to live off of less food with easy recipes.

[Anonymous No.7447835]

http://www.waitrose.com/home/recipes/recipe_directory/h/heston_s_scotch_eggs.html

http://goodfood.uktv.co.uk/recipe/royal-fish-pie/

http://www.insearchofheston.com/2015/09/heston-v-st-john-eccles-cakes-recipes/

http://www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/155633/ruby-fruit-jelly-trifle

http://tvnz.co.nz/masterchef-australia/ep-11-roast-rib-eye-steak-yorkshire-pudding-3681595

http://oakden.co.uk/melton-mowbray-pork-pie/

https://www.rivercottage.net/recipes/pams-piccalilli

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2011/jan/30/nigel-slater-classic-roly-poly

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/wordofmouth/2013/sep/19/how-to-make-perfect-lemon-posset

also buy some marmite and heinz beans

[Anonymous No.7447879]

>>7447823
but living off barely anything in two world wars is what gave Britain a shitty reputation for food.

[Anonymous No.7447898]

>>7447584
nice roast joint of beef, pork, etc
yorkshire puddings
roast potatoes
carrots and some other veg you like such as broccoli
lovely gravy made with the meat drippings you get out of your roasting pan

lovely sunday dinner for the family after a morning at the village church

[Anonymous No.7447942]

I'm having some kippers right now 2bh.

[Anonymous No.7448052]

Just have a roast. I'm a pretty firm believer in chicken gravy, I feel like it's rich without being too overbearing on the rest of the meal like some of the other meat choices. But don't do something stupid like buy chicken packet gravy, that stuff is a fucking mess of retarded spices that have no place near a roast. You get a beef gravy style, then add the chicken drippings.

[Anonymous No.7448090]

>>7447606
>Britbong food used to be very similar to French food but took a lot longer to recover after WW2.
I want this meme to end.

[Anonymous No.7448093]

>>7447584
a bowl of pedigree
a jug of milk
mix, stir as needed

[Anonymous No.7448188]

>>7448093
Pedigree what damn it?

[Anonymous No.7448196]

Sticky Toffee Pudding desu lad.

[Anonymous No.7448335]

>>7448196

With custard. Don't forget the custard!

In that vein, crumble. Good rhubarb crumble is the pudding of kings.

[Anonymous No.7448344]

[Anonymous No.7448572]

>>7448335

>custard

cream or gtfo

custard is for rhubarb crumble

[Anonymous No.7448983]

>>7447584
Try this:
http://www.deliaonline.com
Female British Chef, everything from easy to hard. Sort of a British Martha Stewart.

[Anonymous No.7449070]

Britain generally only invents ways to be more practical, even with food. Eating is a secondary concern. For example, pic related invented the sandwich so he could eat while pursuing more manly concerns (such as gambling, smashing birds and being first lord of the admiralty). Next thing you know, we're inventing the toast sandwich because the sandwich still isn't practical enough.

If you want to know about cuisine, talk to the French or the Italians. While they were twisting pasta into fancy shapes, Brits were digging mountains of coal out of the ground, building steam engines and projecting naval power around the world like the autistic megalomaniacs that we are.

We do make more types of cheese than any other country though. 500 varieties compared to France's 400.

For an easy, authentic taste of Britain, I'd suggest a Ploughman's Lunch, preferably with a pint of ale.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ploughman's_lunch

[Anonymous No.7449092]

>>7449070
>We do make more types of cheese than any other country though. 500 varieties compared to France's 400.

Damn, I would have lost a bet on that. Why so much variety?

[Anonymous No.7449093]

>>7449070
>We do make more types of cheese than any other country though. 500 varieties compared to France's 400.

Damn, I would have lost a bet on that. Why so much variety?

[Anonymous No.7449096]

Put a slice of toast in between two other slices of toast.
You got yourself a hot breadie toastie yum-yum, as they call it

[Anonymous No.7449106]

>>7449093

>Why so much variety?

that is a very hard question to answer. combination of population density, fashion and the strain on the dairy industry i'd wager

[Anonymous No.7449112]

There's a reason every single dinner tradition in England comes from France.

What they do really well:
The English Breakfast & Toasted Sandwiches (English Breakfasts you can hold in your hand)
Afternoon Tea (Earl Grey, crustless sandwiches, scones)
Puddings and cakes
Pies

Maybe a local cheese or two. Stilton for one. Old fashioned Cheddar.

Adaptations of Indian food - chutney, kedgeree

Drinks:
Gin, gin punches, gin & tonic, pink gin (gin & bitters)
Ale
Navy rum, rum & lime, rum & ginger beer
Bovril, Ovaltine
Assam tea with milk and indecent amounts of sugar
Earl Grey (black tea with bergamot)

[Anonymous No.7449124]

>>7449112

>every single dinner tradition in England comes from France.

uh

[Anonymous No.7449125]

>>7447584
none bong here:

faggots are fairly easy, and tasty, but you need offal
mushy peas
fish and chips but that's kinda generic
Yorkshire puddings
cottage/shepard pies
crumpets

[Anonymous No.7449146]

>>7447835
wtf, randomly clicked the pork pie recipe. pie filling is pork, salt, pepper and water. i tried to give them the benefit of the doubt but it seems like the bongs truly hate flavor...

[Anonymous No.7449156]

>>7449070
>if you want an authentic meal, try a case study in feigned nationalism for commercial gain
not sure if subtle troll or just actually wanting people to consider a crust of bread and cheese a dish

[Anonymous No.7449161]

>>7449146

no, we just like the flavour of pork.

[Anonymous No.7449166]

>>7449156

a bit of bread and cheese is usually a pretty good representation of any dairying culture

[Anonymous No.7449169]

>>7449124
Fork and knife, the way the food is served, the concept of aperitif and digestif, wine, the order of separation of food types (e.g. sweet last,) fork in left hand (spread from France in the 18th-19th centuries,) the traditional 8 to 9pm time for dinner, the practice of eating the main meal in the evening and not midday, having coffee after dinner (or coffee at all,) brandy, champagne, the way to eat bread (tear, butter, eat, repeat, not buttering all at once,) most other forms of etiquette, the technique of cooking, use of herbs and sauces, I could go on, but I'd just be describing every aspect of non-peasant dining.

Turn of the century menus were mostly in French. Do you think they had items like "kippers and vinegar"?

Oh, and vinegar. Vin aigre, bitter wine.

[Anonymous No.7449185]

>>7449169

that's an extremely disingenuous list, some elements of which are half truths, some of which are true but not directly inherited from the french.

there is a broader interchanging of ideas between european nations than is represented in that list. the very concept of course-based table service is russian, after all.

[Anonymous No.7449187]

>>7448572

Custard is for sticky toffee you cunt.

Good vanilla ice cream on crumble is untraditional but GOAT

[Anonymous No.7449191]

>>7449187

you don't need to add more sugar and egg to your sticky toffee. it's all about cold cream.

[Anonymous No.7449201]

If you like liver, liver and bacon casserole with mashed potatoes is GOAT comfort food.

[Anonymous No.7449203]

My mom makes chili cobbler which I'm only sticking in because its a traditional meal in my house. Make chili, put unbaked scones on top, put in the oven.

Blows rice the fuck out.

[Anonymous No.7449225]

>>7449191

The egg flavour produced by a custard is completely different to the egg already present in a sticky toffee.

If you don't want more sweetness then sure cold cream is fine, but that argument is retarded.

[Anonymous No.7449264]

>>7447606
You're right about puddings, Apple, rhubarb, and blackberry crumbles are served with custard and a staple of roast dinners.

Roasts don't involve chicken though, chicken isn't British at all, we eat beef and Yorkshire puddings with mash, veg and gravy or lamb chops and mint sauce.

Pies are a meme and aren't at all common, apart from steak and ale and steak and kidney. Cornish pasties are something eaten at petrol stations and the seaside and are generally not part of a meal but a snack.

Fish or battered saveloy and chips with curry sauce is a very traditional dinner.

Jam rolly pollies are easy and traditional to make, as are trifles, egg custards and chocolate eclairs.

Roast a pile of root vegetables with a nice slab of beef, add a bit of horseradish on the side and boil some broccoli and carrots, add in a Yorkshire pudding or two. Thats quintessential British quisine.

Oh, and scones with jam and clotted cream, served with a cup of tea. We don't eat crumpets, that's a meme.

Beef stew with suet dumplings is a classic everyone's nan used to make, and it's the easiest thing ever.

[Anonymous No.7449284]

>>7449225

>The egg flavour produced by a custard is completely different to the egg already present in a sticky toffee.

i don't see how.

the point is more to do with mouthfeel than flavour, but yes both a sticky toffee pudding and a custard are eggy.

>>7449264

>Pies are a meme and aren't at all common,
>Fish or battered saveloy and chips with curry sauce is a very traditional dinner.

no idea how you can say these things next to each other with a straight face. pies are also a very traditional meal and a huge part of our culinary heritage

[Anonymous No.7449288]

>>7449264

>Roasts don't involve chicken though, chicken isn't British at all,

lol what

[Anonymous No.7449301]

>>7447942
What the devil? Is that a fucking toast holder? Motherfuck.

[Anonymous No.7449302]

>>7449156
A Ploughman's can be as simple or as sophisticated as you want. Sure, it CAN be a chunk of cheddar and some Branston's between two slices of bread. It can also be a smorgasbord of different cheeses, cold meats, salad veggies, fruits, pickles, chutneys and complimentary traditional ales and ciders. A good Ploughman's looks less like a sarnie and more like a delicatessen threw up on a pub garden's picnic table.

A trawl through Google images shows Ploughman's Lunches that include scotch eggs, pork pies, slices of quiche, I even saw one with half an avocado.

I'd consider pic related as much a dish as lasagne, and OP asked for easy recipes, so Beef Wellington is off the menu. I stand by my suggestion, no trolling.

[Anonymous No.7449340]

>>7449156
Zakuski is a dish and not too far from a ploughmans lunch, but why am I telling you this when you are just a desperate troll?

[Anonymous No.7449355]

>>7449288
>>7449284
Depends where you're from I geuss, I've never seen or heard of chicken for a Sunday roast, it's beef, lamb or pork.

Pies are a meme though, you'd be unlikely to go out and buy a pie from the highstreet, it's more of a traditional thing.

[Anonymous No.7449358]

>>7449355

ever heard of fucking greggs

[Anonymous No.7449359]

>>7449264
>chickens aren't British at all
They were pretty uncommon in terms of being the main part of a meal seeing as though they're better off making eggs over time rather than making just one meal.

>pies aren't common
You're chatting shit, mate. Pies are served in every chippy and at every football ground in the country.

>don't eat crumpets
You one of those that call them pikelets types?


>>7449302
For years I thought it was Ploughmans', as in plural, with the logic that the workers would bring different parts and share it all between them on the board.

[Anonymous No.7449402]

>>7449264

Delete this shitty post.

>Pies are a meme
>Don't eat crumpets
>No roast chicken
>lamb chops rather than a lamb joint
>Mash but no mention of roast potatoes
>Shit talking cornish pasties
>Shit chippy choices

Where the fuck are you even from?

[Anonymous No.7449409]

Cooking isn't really much of a thing here, most of our traditional dishes are just simple meat + potato + vegetable, we're pretty similar to Scandinavia in that regard, though our cuisine has less weird fishy stuff.

I'd say try Cottage or Shepherds pie, it's the only British thing I can think of right now, we mostly eat other nation's dishes.

[Anonymous No.7449413]

Try a toast sandwich. Very easy.

[Anonymous No.7449419]

>>7449409
>Cooking isn't really much of a thing here, most of our traditional dishes are just simple meat + potato + vegetable, we're pretty similar to Scandinavia in that regard, though our cuisine has less weird fishy stuff.

ugh

you don't know anything about your own country's food

stop talking

[Anonymous No.7449424]

>>7449419
Name 5 dishes that aren't basic as fuck.

[Anonymous No.7449429]

>>7449409
>this anglo has never slaved in the kitchen cooking up a meal of sliced cheese and a hunk of bread to accompany his poured beer
race traitors inbound

[Anonymous No.7449441]

>>7449429
I already spent my paycheck on salt for salt sandwiches, it's a hard life.

[Anonymous No.7449451]

>>7449355
>>7449264
>Saveloy
>Pies are a meme
>never seen or heard of chicken for a Sunday roast

I genuinely don't mean this to sound patronising, but do you live south of Watford by any chance?

[Anonymous No.7449456]

>>7449146
It's funny because the French have them too under a different name, but you're just a shitposting American, obsessing over us is what you do.

[Anonymous No.7449466]

>>7449456

>visible pistachios and lobes of foie

yeah, not helping your point (which i agree with otherwise)

[Anonymous No.7449471]

>>7448188

[Anonymous No.7449474]

>>7449471

holy shit they got rid of the chum part

[Anonymous No.7449476]

>>7449424

Trifle, steak and kidney pudding, tikka masala, kedgeree, beef wellington.

Basic ingredients=/=basic dish

[Anonymous No.7449484]

>>7449471
It's called Pedigree chum, fuck you and your shithole country.

[Anonymous No.7449493]

>>7449476

i didn't want to respond to that cause i know he's just gonna make all kinds of goalpost shifting qualifications to whatever i say. what i really took issue with was that we don't cook, our food is just 'meat and potato and veg' as if there's no art to the preparation of those elements even in the cases where they're the principle parts of the meal, and we don't have weird fish stuff. it's just clear that he's getting this stuff from cultural stereotypes and not from actually experiencing the country. it's easy to live here and not observe the richness of our historic food culture because it is somewhat submerged, but you don't get to make sweeping statements about it if you haven't looked into it.

[Anonymous No.7449498]

>>7449476
>trifle
I'll give you that but it's a dessert, not really a dish.

>steak and kidney pudding
How isn't steak, kidney, and gravy in a pie basic as fuck?

>Tikka Masala
Not British.

>Kedgeree
Not British.

>Beef Wellington
Basic ingredients but not so basic, I'll give you this one too.

[Anonymous No.7449508]

>>7449493
We don't cook though, we just don't have a cooking culture like other European countries, our food is basic as fuck stuff that anyone can make, French and Italian food is much much more complicated in comparison.

>we don't have weird fish stuff
You don't know our biggest meme dish? The one everyone shitposts about?

[Anonymous No.7449511]

>>7449476
You forgot spotted dick and faggots, the perfect pairing

[Anonymous No.7449513]

>>7449498
>Tikka Masala
>Not British.

[Anonymous No.7449524]

>>7449508

>our food is basic as fuck stuff that anyone can make, French and Italian food is much much more complicated in comparison.

i'm not going to argue that the french and italians don't have 'complicated' foods but they also have extremely different produce. we have historic traditions of cheesemaking, charcuterie, pastry and sweets work, preserving and so on that usually get overlooked in favour of people ranting about meat and two veg and boiled stuff. everyone knows about shepherd's pie but few people ever talk about laver bread or cawl or grouse with horseradish and crisps or jugged hare or brawn or all the million other things that the domestic goddesses of days past would have known how to do. i don't think french low cooking is really more 'complicated' than english, they're strongly related after all. the french, however, have much stronger links to places which actually enjoy sunshine.

>You don't know our biggest meme dish? The one everyone shitposts about?

i was saying, we do have weird fish stuff, and that's a good thing.

[Anonymous No.7449534]

>>7449498

>Kedgeree and Tikka Masala not British

Good luck finding it outside of Britain

Steak and kidney pudding is different from pie, and less basic. Bet you can't cook one without looking up ingredients/method.

[Anonymous No.7449535]

>>7449524
Yeah we're very good at making the individual parts but we're not good at making them into dishes, especially in poorer places. I think in modern times our reputation is even worse because of our family culture, we don't teach our children to cook anymore.

[Anonymous No.7449540]

>>7449534
Oh, I misread, isn't the pudding version just steamed? Or is it boiled?

[Anonymous No.7449548]

>>7449535
>we don't teach our children to cook anymore
I'd be interested to see how school cooking classes have changed since the 50s or 60s here and abroad.
Is cooking still taught in schools here in England? Kinda surprised I haven't seen any Daily Mail articles about schools banning the cooking of toad in the hole because of offending Muslims.


>>7449540
Savoury puddings are made using suet.

[Anonymous No.7449563]

>>7449548
I just looked it up, apparently we had home economics as a GCSE but they're scrapping it to replace it with "food technology" which covers stuff like nutrition and packaging, pretty dumb desu.

>Savoury puddings are made using suet.
Oh, I didn't know, I usually stay away from anything with pudding in the title because I hate most sweet puddings.

[Anonymous No.7449573]

>>7449563

>hey're scrapping it to replace it with "food technology" which covers stuff like nutrition and packaging, pretty dumb desu.

why

> I usually stay away from anything with pudding in the title because I hate most sweet puddings.

then stop pretending to know fucking anything about brit food

[Anonymous No.7449579]

>>7449573
>you can't talk shit about the cuisine if you hate any part of it

[Anonymous No.7449583]

>>7449579

the point is that you don't know how flexibly the word 'pudding' is used in this country so you clearly don't know very much at all about the food of this country.

[Anonymous No.7449593]

>>7449583
Yorkshire pudding and black pudding are the only things I can think of other than steak and kidney.

[Anonymous No.7449601]

>>7449563
>>7449573
I'm gonna guess they're changing it because people are retarded and don't know how to read ingredients lists or nutritional info. The amount of people I've spoken to who still don't understand how many calories are in some foods boggles the mind. People in their mid 20s who don't realise makers will put "1/8th contains..." to make it look healthier than it is.
Knowing nutrition is as important as knowing how to cook but you've gotta know both.
When I was at school cooking was an optional GCSE as part of technology classes. You either took graphic design, cooking, wood/metal working, or textiles. We were never taught nutrition outside of the food groups and a cartoon pyramid.

[Anonymous No.7449606]

>>7449593

groat pudding, dock pudding, white and black pudding, pease pudding... the word itself comes from a french word usually used for sausages.

[Anonymous No.7449611]

>>7449593

Yeah, you don't know enough to be shit talking.

I know that british cuisine is relatively poor in comparison to others nations, but I also actually know what the fuck it is. I also know the reasons for it being poor is 30% Geography, 20% Stubbornness, and 50% rationing.

[Anonymous No.7449612]

>>7449606
I've literally never heard of any of those three, I guess it's just not a southern thing.

[Anonymous No.7449618]

>>7449611
We're talking about savoury pudding, not regular.

[Anonymous No.7449634]

People need to understand nutrition across the board. Calories are useless without an understanding of the whole body. Exercise, macro/micro-nutrients are more important.

I think finance, nutrition, health/fitness, media, and politics should be compulsory education topics.

[Anonymous No.7449635]

>>7449618

Ever heard of white pudding?

[Anonymous No.7449642]

>>7449635
Yes, I always thought it was just black pudding without the blood though.

[Anonymous No.7449653]

>>7449642

haggis is another pudding

[Anonymous No.7449659]

>>7449653
It is? I never knew and I eat it quite often.

[Anonymous No.7449676]

>>7449659

basically any wet mixture consisting of ground or chopped stuff bound with fat, eggs or water and cooked in some kind of form could be considered a pudding in bongland, though usually when it's leavened it'll be a cake or bread or something. chances are, if it falls into that category and we got to give it a name, it'll be a pudding. of course this applies to a *lot* of desserts which is why there was a semantic shift to that being the common understanding of its usage.

[Anonymous No.7449691]

>>7447606
>check out spotted dick

[Anonymous No.7450426]

Scones and tea

[Anonymous No.7450476]

[Anonymous No.7450500]

>>7447606
>Britbong food used to be very similar to French

No. Bong food was reviled waaay before WW1 let alone WW2.

[Anonymous No.7450513]

>>7449302
>On a cut
>Want nothing but cheese and a whole loaf of bread
Help

[Anonymous No.7450567]

>>7449451

Oi, don't tar all southerners under the same branch as this twat.

I'm from Hampshire, as far south as it's possible to be without being from the Isle of Wight (if you were that unlucky). Our family had roast chicken on a Sunday, as well as beef and pork. And I don't know what he's going on about with pies, a nice weekend treat would be going to the local baker and picking up some pies to have for lunch.

[Anonymous No.7450569]

>>7449161
It musn't be kosher enough for Americans. Hell, their hotdogs are made out of beef to not offend their jewish masters.

[Anonymous No.7450571]

>>7449169
From the knife hand part alone I can tell that you're an American shitposting, although that describes half of the thread.

[Anonymous No.7450578]

>>7449264
>Pies are a meme and aren't at all common
Everything else is accurate but this, what the fuck?

[Anonymous No.7450580]

>>7449301
Oh yes, I forgot the fun we had on /int/ when we discovered that Americans don't have toast rack technology.

[Anonymous No.7450583]

>>7450580
Do you have them in your home? As a Britbong in one of the whitest areas I've never seen a place here with them unless it's a B&B or a massive family

[Anonymous No.7450584]

>>7449402
I think roast potatoes are an important one because Americans don't have them and think that they are just potatoes put in the oven and not a set thing.

[Anonymous No.7450585]

>>7449409
It's always sad when people don't put any effort into their shitposting.

Trolling is a artform.

[Anonymous No.7450586]

>>7450578

Most of it is as inaccurate as the pie thing. We don't eat crumpets? Seriously?

[Anonymous No.7450588]

>>7449429
>>7449441
Americans are a cancer and you don't even realise how obvious you are.

[Anonymous No.7450589]

>>7450584
>Boil potatoes for a bit
>Preheat oven with some oil in the tray
>Rough up potatoes so the edges are bashed
>Put them on the tray
>Add some balsamic vinegar and garlic and salt. Rosemary and thyme
>Put them in the oven
One of the better Jamie Oliver things I have seen

[Anonymous No.7450590]

>>7449508
You're a very poor shitposter. Off yourself.

[Anonymous No.7450592]

>>7450589
>oil
Fuck off.

Goose fat or bust.

[Anonymous No.7450595]

>>7449513
>>7449534
Why the fuck are you even falling for some of the poorest bait this side of /b/?

[Anonymous No.7450621]

>>7447584
Amerifat living in Bongland. Don't try the food. The reputation of bad food is true. You can eat mushy peas, beans or boiled goose. Those are your only options

[Anonymous No.7450624]

>>7449169
Vinegar is bitter?

[Anonymous No.7450627]

>>7449563
>doing gcses about 1995-6
>have compulsory home ec
>making pizza from scratch and other cool shit
>end of year 4, have to choose 2 "options" subjects
>"food tech?" fuck yeah, more cooking
>spend the next 2 years sat at a desk leaning about the most boring aspects of food
>spend about 20 minutes on the coursework and fail miserably

Sometimes school is bullshit.

[Anonymous No.7450650]

>>7450627
Don't they give you a grace period where if you don't like the subject, you can switch out to something else after the first week or two?

[Anonymous No.7450651]

This thread is surprisingly comfy. Despite having a reputation as being "bland, British cuisine seems to have an appealing simplicity and universality, it invokes images of home and common life.

[Anonymous No.7450656]

>>7450651
You want comfy British culture you should watch The Good Life.

[Anonymous No.7450664]

>>7449540
If you weren't an American shitposting you would know this basic bit of information.

[Anonymous No.7450669]

>>7449618
And once more you are using the American usage of words.

good lord at least research before you try and shitpost, yank.

[Anonymous No.7450670]

>>7450627

>Do GCSE Food Tech
>Get a G grade
>Working in restaurant a few years later, old food tech teacher comes in (we had an open kitchen so I could see the customers)
>She orders a sirloin steak
>Sends it back because there's a "big strip of fat down the side of it"

L E L
E
L

Fucking moron.

[Anonymous No.7450672]

>>7450500
Moron.

[Anonymous No.7450675]

>>7450621
Too obvious, you are a European false flagging as a clap.

[Anonymous No.7450678]

>>7450651
It's bland if you're a shitposter maybe.

[Anonymous No.7450688]

>>7449451
Im from the cultural wasteland known as Birmingham

[Anonymous No.7450689]

>>7450656
I want to be Tom from that so bad.

being married to a young Felicity Kendal wouldn't go amiss either.

[Anonymous No.7450702]

>>7450689
Not many of them left.
>Briers died in 2013

[Anonymous No.7450733]

>>7450702
I saw a picture of Chris Barrie yesterday, he look fucking old. I died inside.

[Anonymous No.7450752]

>>7449169
Man, it's almost like the two countries are like right next door to each other and shared people, culture and royalty for thousands of years, or something.

Hey did you know Austria & Germany are pretty similar too? I know, right!

[Anonymous No.7450793]

>>7450669
corrr blimey, all y'all commoners can't even soccer like us pudding niggers

[Anonymous No.7450831]

>>7449070

What kind of beer is/was traditionally drunk in the UK with these sorts of meals, and at what ABV percentage?

[Anonymous No.7450843]

>>7449203

I fucking knew you pricks put chili over rice.

[Anonymous No.7450877]

>>7450843
Shit we've been rumbled.

[Anonymous No.7451026]

>>7450831
Strong ale. 9-12% or cider or scrumpy, about 6%

[Anonymous No.7451046]

>>7451026

Reverse those numbers senpai.

[Anonymous No.7451057]

this is my favorite british beer

[Anonymous No.7451081]

>>7450752
You mean Germany and Germany?

[Anonymous No.7451090]

>>7451057
Gahaha. I also drank beer on the great wall. Brought it myself, fucking warm as soup, drank it anyway while listening to some Northern Irelanders from my hidden crevice.

[Anonymous No.7451108]

>>7450571
The fact that Americans hadn't adopted it by 1775 shows what latecomers the British themselves are.

[Anonymous No.7451294]

>>7450793

>pudding niggers

[Anonymous No.7451340]

>>7450651
British food can be summarised as follows

>uncreative but tasty
>simple
>tastes better than it looks

all of the turbo meme foods like toast sandwiches or stargazy pie arent actually consumed by anyone

jellied eels maybe

[Anonymous No.7451626]

>>7451340

Jellied eels is a cockney thing, cockneys are meme British.

[Anonymous No.7451675]

>>7449302
>Beef Wellington
>not easy
Wat. It's simple as can be.

[Anonymous No.7451690]

>>7451675

the crust and meat always separates and the bottom of the crust goes soggy

[Anonymous No.7451806]

>>7449264

Westerner here, the culinary capital of traditional British food

>You're right about puddings, Apple, rhubarb, and blackberry crumbles are served with custard and a staple of roast dinners.
Yeah fair, apple crumble is quality

>Roasts don't involve chicken though, chicken isn't British at all, we eat beef and Yorkshire puddings with mash, veg and gravy or lamb chops and mint sauce.
What? We don't eat chicken? First I heard of this. Also, roasts vary around the country, ours are traditionally pork in cider gravy with apple sauce. Also roast potatoes instead of mash, what is wrong with you? Yorkshire puddings are also a regional addition, in the south west we have a big suet dumpling thing called crunchy pudding.

>Pies are a meme and aren't at all common, apart from steak and ale and steak and kidney. Cornish pasties are something eaten at petrol stations and the seaside and are generally not part of a meal but a snack.
Again, varies around the country. I have to assume you're a yank spending your first weekend in London. Cornish pasties are the lifeblood of the south west, and you don't serve it with chips and peas, it's a self sufficient meal, the taters and veg are inside. The North are obsessed with pies and Yorkshire and Lancashire folks are incredibly proud of their pie, chips and mushy peas tradition.

>Fish or battered saveloy and chips with curry sauce is a very traditional dinner.
Yeah nah, fish and chips are the "seaside treat" - also you don't have curry sauce on it unless you are literally king of the plebs or living far enough from the sea that your local chippie need to hide the taste with curry. Salt and vinegar is all you should need. Worcestershire sauce is acceptable.

1/2

[Anonymous No.7451877]

>>7450843

chili over rice is fucking god tier you shit

[Anonymous No.7451887]

>>7451806
>Jam rolly pollies are easy and traditional to make, as are trifles, egg custards and chocolate eclairs.
Jam rolly pollies are a school dinner. If you're still eating it past 11 years old you need to sort your life out.

>Roast a pile of root vegetables with a nice slab of beef, add a bit of horseradish on the side and boil some broccoli and carrots, add in a Yorkshire pudding or two. Thats quintessential British quisine.
*Yorkshire cuisine.

>Oh, and scones with jam and clotted cream, served with a cup of tea. We don't eat crumpets, that's a meme.
Oh wow some actual western food well done. We do eat crumpets though, toasted crumpets with butter and marmite are the stuff of dreams.

>Beef stew with suet dumplings is a classic everyone's nan used to make, and it's the easiest thing ever.
It's also unspeakably boring.

Most South Western food I can think of would be sausages in cider. Get a bottle of scrumpy and slowly pour it over frying sausages and onions, add flour and stock to thicken the sauce and paprika if you want a bit more spice. Let it reduce for 30 minutes and serve it with taters. Simple as.

For something great from London I recommend spicy chicken fried rice. Chicken, onions, peppers, reggae reggae sauce, garam masala, turmeric, bay leaves and coriander in a pan, add some rice, mix it up, add some water, let it reduce to nothing, add peas.

Birmingham food is just curry. Just make make a curry with shit tons of tomatoes and add creme fraîche.

For a really nice meal from Yorkshire, make a beef madras with a very thick sauce, stick it in a pie. Bake for an hour. Serve with chips and mushy peas.

Most Welsh thing I can think of would be lamb shanks in red wine gravy with purple sprouting and new potatoes. Can't for the life of me remember how best to cook it though.

[Anonymous No.7451896]

>>7451675

If that were true, Hell's Kitchen wouldn't be so hilarious.

[Anonymous No.7451907]

>>7451675
This
All you have to do is put uncooked meat onto a plate and call it food.

[Anonymous No.7451908]

[Anonymous No.7452053]

>>7450793
Even trying to satirise being called out on your Americanisms you manage to fuck up and use more unintended Americanisms. You're a basic bitch.

[Anonymous No.7452058]

>>7452053
Aoohh bother dun get your knickers in a bonch

[Anonymous No.7452063]

>>7452053
Save the queen!

[Anonymous No.7452104]

>>7450675
Nope. I is for serious. American engineer in Bongland. In the facility I work at, the 'canteen' serves every shit entree with mashed peas and beans.
I asked for toast at breakfast time and they said they only had fried bread. These fuckers literally deep-fry bread. English food has a bad reputation for a reason

[Anonymous No.7452116]

>>7450592
Fuck off. Beef dripping or go home.

[Anonymous No.7452160]

>>7452104
>that manatee getting a stargazey all to hisself
jammy feller

[Anonymous No.7452219]

>>7452104
I don't think I've ever once had fried bread. You're probably just working somewhere too shit to afford a toaster

[Anonymous No.7452236]

>>7452104
Do they not have Eggy bread?

[Anonymous No.7452250]

>>7452104
>Blue collar work canteen serves shit food

No please tell us more about how back home in the Good 'ol USA of it was Salmon en croute with fresh seasonable vegetables and a fois gras starter followed by Apple Pie & Ice Cream every day of the week, and it only cost you a nickel.

[Anonymous No.7452347]

>>7449302
It's midnight... and I'm feeling peckish, this picture doesn't help at all...

[Anonymous No.7452371]

>>7452104

>american engineer in england

why are you living life backwards

[Anonymous No.7452630]

>>7450584
literally everyone in America makes those

[Anonymous No.7452639]

>>7452630
Let him live his fantasy, man. It makes him happy.

[Anonymous No.7452649]

>>7450584
Not at all. I was raised in Alabama and my mother made these.

You boil them for a tad, roll in flour and then put it in animal fat [we used lard...I know not "authentic"] heated in the oven right?

[Anonymous No.7452656]

>>7451887
>crumpets with Marmite
No I know up here in the Midlands does this. Top tier supper time snack.

As for South Western food I think the best I've had was the fresh caught squid I tried at a food festival in Truro last September or the bangers 'n' mash I had in a pub in either Hayle or St Ives when I was about 11. I can't remember where it was but I still remember the design on the plate because I literally licked the plate clean of gravy it was so good.

Been meaning to order some more sauces from a chili farm down there too so cheers for reminding me.

[Anonymous No.7452663]

English breakfast is a good start. You'll be familiar with most of the ingredients anyway. The black pudding and beans are optional. Eggs any way you like.

[Anonymous No.7452667]

>>7452656
How was the squid cooked?

[Anonymous No.7452673]

[Anonymous No.7452681]

>>7452667
It was just seasoned and quickly cooked on a griddle with a squirt of lemon juice. I'd only ever had it breaded and fried before so for it to not be chewy and somewhat bland was a revelation to me.
Also tried a rabbit burger the same afternoon which was delicious too.

[Anonymous No.7452689]

British food and German food have a lot in common, and for good reason; it's the food empires were built on

America has a culture of burgers and fried whatever the fuck because the immigrants who built the country needed food like that to work their asses off all day

Shit on it because it's not flimsy french haute cuisine bullshit all you want, it's food for people who got shit done

[Anonymous No.7452697]

>>7452689
The French had a bigger empire than the Germans.

[Anonymous No.7452704]

>>7452697
yeah but it was French so who gives a shit

[Anonymous No.7452830]

>>7451108
Trend setters lad.

[Anonymous No.7452838]

>>7451887
>stew and dumplings
>unspeakably boring

Viper my man.

[Anonymous No.7452841]

>>7452058
>>7452063
For fucks sake at least wait a few seconds when samefagging.

[Anonymous No.7452846]

>>7452104
>entree
Now do you know how I know that your story was a lie? We use the correct usage of the term, the French one. Only scoot'N'shoots call the starter the main.

Get fucked., cunt.

[Anonymous No.7452854]

>>7452630
That's not what the burgers on /int/ claim. They claim that Americans don't roast potatoes in animal drippings and a baked potato is a roast potato there.

[Anonymous No.7452874]

>>7452663
>The black pudding and beans are optional

[Anonymous No.7452880]

>>7452697
And the Germans conquered France so utterly that they are still mocked for it 70 years later.

[Anonymous No.7452904]

>>7452880
krauts in reichsland elsaß-lothringen still eat omlette du fromage though tbqhfam

[Anonymous No.7452913]

>>7452854
You realize that /int/ is as poor a source for reliable information as /ck/? No offense but you guys are really willing to accept memes as facts.

[Anonymous No.7454751]

>>7452250
It's in a research facility, not a blue collar wasteland. And yes, the food in the US facility I worked at (same industry) is better and cheaper. Not everything is fried or boiled

[Anonymous No.7454859]

>>7452663

>the black pudding and beans are optional

You are wrong.

[Anonymous No.7454955]

>>7452663
Full English Breakfast components in order of importance (imo - feel free to correct):

1. Bacon
2. Egg
3. Beans
4. Tomato
5. Toast
6. Sausage
7. Mushroom
8. Black Pudding
9. Hash Browns
10. Everything Else

[Anonymous No.7454981]

>>7454955
Agree with you about the top three but then

4. Sausage
5. Black pudding
6. Toast
7. Tomato
8. Mushroom
9. Hashbrowns
10. Everything else

[Anonymous No.7455003]

>>7449125
Who was Shepard?

[Anonymous No.7455034]

>>7449359
>chatting shit.
Definitely not British, mate.

[Anonymous No.7455683]

>>7452371
because there is no one in England that can do what I do, so they had to call in an American. I'm well compensated for it and the chicks love my 'accent'

[Anonymous No.7455736]

>>7455034

'chatting shit' is extremely common slang here in london

[Anonymous No.7455764]

>>7455683

It's pretty creepy watching these guys rip fish apart and eat them.

[Anonymous No.7455967]

>>7451908
fucking love those, even if eating them does nothing but crack my teeth senpai

[Anonymous No.7456569]

>>7449096
The nation's mums think they're brilliant.

[Anonymous No.7457739]

>>7455967
You can get types which are mostly air and crunch easily

[Anonymous No.7457746]

>>7455764
There's plaety of clips of tortoises attacking cats and other pets

[Anonymous No.7457766]

>>7449146

The pie is filled with pork jelly which is pure melt in the mouth flavour to accompany the wholesome pork taste.

Americans ought to learn something from European food.

Simplicity and subtlety are king. Only third worlds use lots of spices to hide the stench of their rotting unrefrigerated meat.

[Anonymous No.7457809]

>>7457766

I am sure all those pork pies that you eat are made from 70% poor quality pork and could use some spice and herbs.

Ever heard of the spice trade? Europeans can't get enough of spices. Since you are obviously a Britfag, why are you ignoring the fact that something call chicken tikka masala is hailed as the national dish of England? Which is pretty much the general Tsao chicken of middle eastern cuisine.

[Anonymous No.7459219]

>>7457809

>I am sure all those pork pies that you eat are made from 70% poor quality pork

so you implicitly accept that a pork pie can be a good thing provided you use good quality pork, i take it.

[Anonymous No.7460511]

>>7447584
Make some rock cakes. I make the without spices version and use sultanas not mixed fruit which is wrong anyway. And I put the mix in muffin cases they stay moister.

Very comforting with a nice cup of tea. My grandad used to make them now I do


As for easy British dishes,are you looking for dinners lunches or puddings?

Would recommend a roast beef with homemade gravy and yorkshire pudding

Roasted or boiled gammon with veg. The irish bit of me prefers it with cabbage and swede rather than carrots and beeyroots but you could have both

[Anonymous No.7460513]

>>7447590
Saint Swithun wishes you an early grave

[Anonymous No.7460527]

>>7451626
Extinct you mean. It's just me and grandad left.

[Anonymous No.7460529]

>>7460511
Rock cakes are always such good value. Bakeries and little vendors in markets always have them the size of Tea-pots for less than £1 good currents and texture every time

[Anonymous No.7460533]

>>7460529
Funnily enough I've never seen one to buy. Would certainly take the effort out of having them but I guess I'm unlikely to find any in southeast londonistan

[Anonymous No.7460542]

>>7460533
I swear that Greggs had them for 40p. Big wad of cake to keep you going for a day

[Anonymous No.7460850]

>>7455034
Never heard of chat shit get banged?

[Anonymous No.7462123]

>>7460527
I live with a cockney. There's me, the cornishman, with a cockney, a brummie, a manc and someone from posh bit of Oxfordshire. We make quite a mix.

[Anonymous No.7463591]

I'm thinking about making hot pork sandwiches today. It really is simple as you could hope for

>Roast the fuck out of a pork joint
>Assemble bread roll (dipped in gravy), apple sauce, sliced pork, crackling and stuffing.
>Drink with pint of scrumpy
>Throw molotov at local mosque (semi-optional)

[Anonymous No.7463593]

>>7463591
I tend to American mine up a bit and add a fuckload more meat

[Anonymous No.7463643]

>>7455034
poortherner detected

[Anonymous No.7464004]

>>7449301
They're nothing to be proud of, all it means is you guarantee the toast is cold before it gets to the table

[Anonymous No.7464023]

>>7463593
That's the saddest pork roll I've ever seen lad, and I barely recognised that off-colour gunk as stuffing

[Anonymous No.7464328]

>>7451057
The list could go on. Just one of many excellent British ales.

[Anonymous No.7464335]

God save our gracious queen. I'm literally jonesing for British food now.