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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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File: 299 KB, 1500x2011, gordon-ramsay-1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7063896 No.7063896 [Reply] [Original]

You wake up in a daze, you can't remember what happened the night before. Suddenly, Gordon Ramsay appears and says you have 45 minutes to prepare your signature dish.

What do you cook?

>> No.7063900

45 minutes? Eh.....probably my cajun pasta with extra jizz in it just for him.

>> No.7063907
File: 36 KB, 300x204, 300px-Bulz_ciobanesc_my_Dumplings_with_butter_and_cheese).jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7063907

>>7063896
picrelated, with a few twists

>> No.7063908

Spaghetti alla carbonara and spend the rest of the time sleeping

>> No.7063915
File: 237 KB, 800x534, 8168323636_259b914dd3_c.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7063915

lettuce carbonara.

prepared with egg yolk, parmesan cheese, olive oil, and black pepper. substituted the bacon with anchovy.

>> No.7063917

>>7063896

sandwich

>> No.7063923

Fettuccine with salmon-spinach-cream sauce

>> No.7063940

Corn coated in rosemary butter and grilled in husk
Eggplant and Portabella marinated in balsamic vinagrette, also grilled
A bacon wrapped pork boneless rib, grilled with kale then wrapped in said kale.

>> No.7063942
File: 402 KB, 500x375, Ck tries to cook an egg.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7063942

An egg

>> No.7063955

grilled cheese :3

>> No.7063963

Raw scallops with 8 lbs of spaghetti

>> No.7063970

Probably a crab cake with a sweet chili sauce

>> No.7063979

Just shit in a bowl and call it curry.

>> No.7063985

Chili with beans.

>> No.7064391

>>7063896
Vension loin. Sliced thin and breaded. Pan fried in canola oil with onions and peppers

>> No.7064417
File: 213 KB, 641x401, 1416886513900.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7064417

>>7063963

>> No.7064440

Beef Stroganoff

>> No.7064447

An all-American burger cooked perfectly with my special combination of seasonings that have been refined over time. Served with a side of sweet potato fries.

>> No.7064448

ragù alla bolognese with farfalle

>> No.7064452

>>7063940
How tender would that boneless rib be?

>> No.7064457

Pate a Choux creme.

>> No.7064463

just screaming

>> No.7064465
File: 120 KB, 700x495, n4lZ0lK.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7064465

Jambalaya with Andouille, crawfish tails, chicken breast, and shrimp, with a thick sliced garlic toast and an ice cold American lager in a glass.

If there's enough time left over, I'd make an individual trifle in a stemmed rocks glass with cubed pound cake, vanilla bourbon cream, and candied cinnamon pecans.

>> No.7064469

>>7063896
Chicken Eduardo

>> No.7064474

>>7063896
Order carryout pizza.
Kick Rammstein in tendies.
Enjoy previously mentioned pizza.

>> No.7064478

M&M's with nuts and raisins

>> No.7064520
File: 2.09 MB, 2592x1936, 'ta.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7064520

Rigatoni with mixed mushrooms(button, oyster and shiitake), rosemary, chili, lemon, garlic and parsley.

>> No.7064524

I hope ramsay is prepared for salad night

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUW_bXll6YM

>> No.7064528

Some fookin raw sea bass

>> No.7064870

Chicken breast grilled with my secret blend of spices in a pita with salad and mayo.

>> No.7064888

>>7063896
Fried chicken thigh. Skin on and crispy. Bone removed

Salt and pepper and a bit of cayenne for spices.

>> No.7064974

>>7063896
Some chicken ofc!

Raaaaw

>> No.7064990

>>7063915
wait you mean a cesar salad?

>> No.7064994

>>7063896
Oysters coming up, Chef!

>> No.7065014
File: 25 KB, 539x489, 539w.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7065014

>>7063896
> Ramsay
> Not Andrew Zimmern

I wouldn't even prepare dogshit for Ramsay.

>> No.7065018

>>7063896
Grilled pineapple-teriyaki marinated yellowfin tuna steak with a side of jasmine rice and steamed vegetables.

Or just homemade pizza.

>> No.7065043

>>7063896
Liver and onions ready in 15 Chef!

>> No.7065049

>>7063896
pumpkin risotto with curry spiced goose

>> No.7065055

>>7063915
he would tell you that means you dont know how to cook
>>7065014
We went to the same school!

>> No.7065058

>>7065014
On the other hand, zimmern would probably be fine with dog shit

>> No.7065059
File: 110 KB, 297x269, gsdhewr.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7065059

Shrimp and grits. Jesus I hope the water boils quickly.

>> No.7065070

>>7065058
Good point.

>> No.7065086

>>7065018
nix the steamed veggies. get something more interesting. otherwise thats a fine dish

>> No.7065183

>>7063896
Lobster for the chef

>> No.7065334

>>7064448
i need 5 hours for that

>> No.7065352

>>7063896
Egg pudding topped with special sauce.

>> No.7065358

A can of baked beans microwaved with sweet chilli sauce and shredded cheddar

>> No.7065664

>>7063896
Top ramen for the ched

>> No.7065679

pan. olive oil. ribeye steak. seasoned. grilled, one side. flipped. into a hot oven. seven minutes. out of the oven. rested. ready.

steak: sorted.

>> No.7065689
File: 6 KB, 500x500, 1446855259981.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7065689

An egg.

>> No.7065727
File: 92 KB, 261x264, Pineapple Head.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7065727

>>7065358
You forgot the two heaping tablespoons of mayo

>> No.7066447

>>7063896

A few things come to mind

Shrimp Saganaki

Three Cheese and Bacon Raviolo with a mushroon sauce

Sweet and Sour Pork Chops with Peppers

Fillet over an herb risotto with a red wine reduction

Green Apple and Rhubarb Roasted Chicken Thighs with a corn puree and biscuits.

>> No.7066451

Bring him a cheeseburger from McDonalds or burger king

>> No.7066464

>>7063896
'sketti

>> No.7066472

>>7065727
just cu/ck/ my shit up

>> No.7066483

>>7063896
take fifteen minutes to think about it, cause thirty minutes is plenty of time to make something once I know what I'm making

>> No.7066486

>>7065043
raaaaw liver
>>7066451

Your McDonalds cheezdburger looks like shit

>> No.7066528

Diced steak with potatoes and green olives cooked in a red chile sauce with garlic.

Rice cooked with tomato paste, fried onions and garlic. Steamed in chicken stock for extra flavor.

Mashed beans with pork lard.

I hope he likes it.

>> No.7067097

his liver with beans and a glass of nice chianti

>> No.7067170

Any form of pasta with beef meatballs, mushrooms and tomato sauce. Please help me, it's all I can cook. It's all I live on. I'm tired of it. Please release me.

>> No.7067173

I'd make some tomato spaghetti, you can't fuck that up and it's not like I have a culinary career on the line.

>> No.7067405

Fried rice with tandoori marinated chicken, sweet soy sauce, onions, garlic and pieces of corn.

>> No.7067461

Nice fresh produce, cooked well; bang! Would you look at that!

>> No.7067464

>>7063896
pork tenderloin with mustard diablo sauce over goat cheese polenta and mushroom sauce. chances are i will sweat in his food because i would be rushing my ass off. it probably wouldnt turn out so hot either.

>> No.7067478

I guess I will make pizza.
With yellow cheese, some quickly mashed together tomato sauce, mushrooms, some leftover bacon ham, and maybe finely chopped fine onion after its done

>> No.7067507

>>7064524
no mas

>> No.7067515

>>7063896
Stuffed zuchini flowers on a bed of garlic + rosemary mashed potatoes and tomato jam. Get fucked if you don't enjoy a vegetarian dish.

>> No.7067721

First I'll prepare a veal cordon bleu microwave meal, Microwaving for ONLY 6 minutes, no other time lower or higher. Then, I use the cheese sauce from the potatoes to rub it all over the breaded meat, creating a type of cheese meat. I add just enough salt and pepper.

The rules are you eat the bare potato slices first, Then without cutting the meat, you eat it with your bare hands. Eat the beans last without the carrots, lick the plate and throw it onto the floor. This is my signature dish.

>> No.7067725
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7067725

>>7067515
>tomato jam

>> No.7067742

Yellow coconut lime curry with potatoes, served over rice.

Kind of a basic dish but I cook it a lot and it's delicious, so it might as well be my signature.

>> No.7067789

>>7066447
fillet of what, you fucking mong

>> No.7067794

>>7067170
swap out the meatballs for shelled baby shrimp and add garlic+anchovy to the tomato sauce
now you have gamberetti marinara in your life
thank me later

>> No.7068469

>>7063896

Chicken Prosciutto with a small Caesar Salad.

>> No.7068487
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7068487

>>7064463

>> No.7068601

I slap on my meme hat. Tie up my "gas the Palestinians" apron and make him the juiciest fucking chicken he's ever had.

>> No.7068649
File: 41 KB, 500x664, tumblr_lh5510vYi61qzaxefo1_500.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7068649

>>7063896
Oh my fucking god this is exactly one of my worst nighmares

I ofter imagine being in a episode of MasterChef and they say what we have to prepare; everyone around me is super sure of what they're doing and I'm just there sperging out because I don't know how to cook for shit

Like, I know that it wouldn't make sense for me to be in that situation, but it still terrifies me

>> No.7068664

>>7065727
Never tried it, does it work out alright?

>> No.7068689

>>7063896
A bowl of eggs and he can't leave until he finishes all of them

>> No.7068696

A can of ravioli.
I heated it up myself.

>>7068689
Why are you doing this?