Cringy Food-Related Experiences

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Cringy Food-Related Experiences Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:06:59 2015 No.6962036 [Reply] [Original]

I recall that when I was in late elementary school (probably 5th grade), I went out to dinner with my friend and his family on a sleep-over night. We went to chili's or one of those family chain/theme restaurants.

My friend ordered a grilled cheese and I, thinking I would impress his parents with my palette & adventurous eating, ordered a $30-something entree called the "rainforest stacker" or something along those lines. It was basically a filet with crab legs and a few sides.

I hardly ate any of it and felt really guilty; didn't even get a doggy bag. I still cringe when I imagine what his parents were thinking...

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:13:14 2015 No.6962054 same thing happened to me tbh friends mom took us to eat in a restaurant and i said id eat when i got home and she got pissed

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:16:32 2015 No.6962061 >>6962054 >same thing thats not the same thing

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:22:29 2015 No.6962074 >>6962061 it is the same thing i just didn't type the entire story because i figured you would use your brain but apparently not

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:25:02 2015 No.6962078 >>6962074 r u high

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:26:17 2015 No.6962084 >>6962078 no u

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:27:51 2015 No.6962090 >>6962084 >read my mind bro >tha story tha same i just didnt tell the story next time tell the whole fucking story or dont post at all you disgusting fart fucker

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:28:59 2015 No.6962092 >>6962090 >lol what is common sense cool man

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:30:44 2015 No.6962096 >>6962092 >lol all i had to include was that i ordered, but didnt eat >lol instead ill just write that i didnt eat >lol let them figure it out because i gotta post fast

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:32:06 2015 No.6962100 >>6962096 >lol what is common sense cool man

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:32:20 2015 No.6962101 Boy I wish people would stop misusing and over using the word cringe and any variation of it.

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:33:12 2015 No.6962104 >>6962101 This post is cringeworthy.

Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:33:49 2015 No.6962108
File: 21 KB, 480x426, 1437889242975.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>be small freshman
>end of football season
>defensive coaches take the defence out to a sports bar and said the bill was on them
>order a cheese steak
>coaches order big thing of wings to split among them
>get done eating
>coach tells me I need to eat more so I can grow
>okay!
>order another cheese steak
>coach says "I meant to eat some of these wings we can't finish"
I'm now a sophomore in uni and I don't forgive myself for that.

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:34:40 2015 No.6962112 >>6962100 >lol oh shit my meme canon is out of ammo cool man

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:34:54 2015 No.6962113 >>6962108 WAO

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:36:16 2015 No.6962115 >>6962112 >le epic meme meme cool man

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:37:17 2015 No.6962118 File: 93 KB, 552x463, 1428767774948.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6962115 >cool man cool man

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:37:58 2015 No.6962120 >>6962113 What

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:38:27 2015 No.6962122 >>6962118 >cool man cool man

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:43:01 2015 No.6962135 File: 53 KB, 422x511, 1437573346599.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6962122 >being so mad you get stuck in an autism feedback loop

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:46:19 2015 No.6962140 >>6962135 C O O L O O L M A N A N

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:49:05 2015 No.6962151 File: 6 KB, 200x250, 1439844166796.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6962140 fly back to your cuck nest

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 22:50:43 2015 No.6962155 >>6962151 cool man

Anonymous Sat Oct 10 23:03:05 2015 No.6962180 [DELETED]

File: 40 KB, 400x388, 1427258999002.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>6962155
>thinks he'll get the last word in this
>isn't going to get the last word in this
cucked again bitch
reply with cool man or some variation to confirm that you are indeed a cuck

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 23:06:12 2015 No.6962195 >>6962180 cool man

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 23:06:59 2015 No.6962199 Mods please do something about all this autism

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 23:08:44 2015 No.6962206 >>6962180 >>6962195 You two should fuck.

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 23:24:09 2015 No.6962248 >>6962206 /thread

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 23:48:52 2015 No.6962319 >>6962206 Seriously take it outside

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 10 23:52:30 2015 No.6962328 >>6962319 take what outside you fucking retard, look at the post times its over sit down

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 00:12:10 2015 No.6962375 File: 19 KB, 294x294, good show.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6962180 >>6962155 >>6962195 >>6962206

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 00:18:47 2015 No.6962392 >>6962054 You're fucking stupid, anon. Is this your first time posting or something?

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 00:34:54 2015 No.6962411 >>6962392 ur moms fucking stupid

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 00:47:06 2015 No.6962426 delete this thread it's terrible

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 00:47:10 2015 No.6962428 >>6962411 cool man

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 00:48:21 2015 No.6962433 >>6962428 cool man

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 00:56:13 2015 No.6962453 >>6962426 Fucking this. Good job >>6962054 you somehow managed to destroy an entire thread with your shitty post, are you Australian or something?

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 01:00:09 2015 No.6962460 >>6962054 same thing happened to me tbh friends mom took us to eat in a restaurant and i ate a big plate of ice cream and vomited all over the table

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 01:03:05 2015 No.6962465 >>6962460 same thing happened to me tbh friends mom took us to eat in a restaurant and i enjoyed a sensibly priced meal of a big mac and fries

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 01:04:00 2015 No.6962466 >>6962426 delete yourself

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 01:06:26 2015 No.6962469 >>6962466 cool dubs, man

Anonymous Sun Oct 11 01:08:46 2015 No.6962477
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This fucking thread is a mess

One time I was staying over at a friend's house and her mom took us out to Hardee's. Friend got a kids meal and I ordered a mushroom and swiss. Her mom asked me "Can you eat all that?"
I ate it all in front of her smug little face.

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 02:03:19 2015 No.6962575 >>6962036 >>6962054 >>6962460 >>6962465 same thing happened to me tbh friends mom took us out to eat in a restaurant and i ordered bacon encrusted kale chips and she got meme'd

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 02:04:28 2015 No.6962579 >>6962477 There's no pride in being fat.

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 02:34:34 2015 No.6962629 >>6962477 >This fucking thread is a mess true but those dubs don't lie

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 03:17:59 2015 No.6962717 >>6962108 his problem for being a dumb faggot who can't say what he wants

Anonymous Sun Oct 11 03:45:48 2015 No.6962804

>had very bad table manners as a young child
>my mom would obviously scold me and tell me to eat properly, but if she wasn't around I'd revert to being a trodgolyte
>chew with mouth open, eat rice with hands, etc
>my sister was friends with the two neighbor girls who lived in the house crossing the street
>our parents were middle class
>their parents were doctors (they had a really nice house with a pool, huge patio, really nice)
>their parents invite us over for dinner
>we get invited over for dinner one night
>what could possibly go wrong?

>show up in jeans and a t-shirt, but clean, my sister's also dressed casual as fuck
>the girls and her parents are dressed nice as fuck
>young me doesn't even notice, I just want some tasty fucking food
>tonight's menu; spaghetti
>her mom serves me
>at least I remember having said "thank you"
>twirl an assload of spaghetti on fork
>stick in mouth
>shove loose strands in with fingers
>sauce everywhere
>do this for a couple minutes, don't even talk, food's good and I just want to eat
>look up at girls
>they're having fun talking to my sister
>look at mom
>she nervously asks if I would like some more
>nod and hand her my plate
>look at their dad
>fucking horrified look on his face

They moved a month later, not joking. I keep remembering the scenario sometimes and become absolutely mortified at how much of a jackass I was, needing to bang my head against something or claw at my face.

Shannon, Coleen, I'm sorry, you guys were fun (and qt).

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 06:24:10 2015 No.6963043 >>6962804 You need to stop feeling guilty over something you had zero affect over.

Anonymous Sun Oct 11 15:09:10 2015 No.6964187
File: 20 KB, 570x300, 1621800_3900950858685_294075318_n.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Oh god, /ck/, time to post this story again.

>be 15
>call myself a "foodie" but am actually just a pretentious faggot
>dad is one of the country's top scientists so he's always overseas on conferences and shit
>takes me along to a conference in Norway for father-son bonding
>fuck yeah, time to sample the local cuisine
>breakfast in hotel on the first day
>edgy teenage me is unimpressed by the buffet of eggs, cereal and other pleb shit
>find a big bowl of cold white soup-like stuff on the dessert table
>get myself a bowl, bring it back to table, tell dad that it's buttermilk koldskal and that he must try it
>dad is sick of his faggot son's shit, keeps eating his eggs
>"This koldskal tastes bad, it's not meant to contain flour but it tastes floury, fucking plebs can't even cook their own national dish"
>koldskal isn't even Norwegian
>waitress is staring at me strangely
>takes my bowl away the moment I leave the table
>get angry, demand an explanation

>mfw I was eating raw pancake batter

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 15:11:49 2015 No.6964198 >>6962804 Nigga you were a kid, stop being so hard on yourself.

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 18:09:44 2015 No.6964803 >>6964187 keeeeeekkk

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 18:13:11 2015 No.6964818 shit thread. BAD THREAD. BAAAAADDD THREAD. What the fuck.

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 18:14:24 2015 No.6964822 >>6964187 Oh shit

Anonymous Sun Oct 11 18:50:24 2015 No.6964921
File: 25 KB, 336x329, 1364004224001.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Redneck side of family has a thanksgiving
>Me and my family normally never go, we go to the one my mom's side has, but there's a family member who's coming into town for the redneck thanksgiving and we want to see them
>Oh well, whatever, how bad could it be?
>Make a key lime pie and bring it
>Get there
>None of them planned before hand on who should bring what
>Three different people bring turkey
>One on the turkeys was cooked earlier in the day and was left sitting on the counter for the whole rest of the day and is cold
>They put it back in the oven to heat it up and it gets dry as shit and is still cold inside
>Another turkey is deep friend and has a weird taste to it
>The third turkey was pumped with some cheap packaged butter mix thing you can get at Walmart and it was nasty as shit
>Side dished are all casseroles mixed with canned shit and processes cheese
>Green beans, cranberries, everything was fucking canned
>All the fucking pies were store bought
>They didn't even buy them from a bakery, they got it from Costco or some shit
>Everyone likes my pie and it gets eaten before I can have a piece

I ate their food to be polite, but fucking hell. It was the first time I've ever left Thanksgiving hungry.

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 19:16:30 2015 No.6964980 >>6964818 lol what thanks for contributing

Anonymous Sun Oct 11 21:25:25 2015 No.6965326

>>6962804
That reminds me of dinner-at-a-friends'-as-a-kid story.

>friend's family is poor
>but, kid, so don't grasp the concept of money yet
>friend invites me to dinner
>family splurged and got filet mignon
>never actually had filet mignon before, and in general never liked steak
Still don't, because even though I love my mom and she's an amazing cook, she doesn't trim the meat really well and most of the time the steaks I get have huge inedible globs of fat even though the meat part itself is fine.
>expecting chunks of fat because see above
>friend passes me A1 sauce and tells me to pour it on the filet
>do so because don't know any better
>at the time, think it's the best thing ever
>gobble up my portion in about thirty seconds, ask for more
>keep eating and eating until full

>decades later, when talking to this friend about whatever, the discussion of that comes up, and he reveals that his family still remembers that night and it turns out they originally planned on serving everyone one slice and keeping the rest of the filet for future meals, and I basically ate the entire filet myself

I still want to go back and smack past me on the back of the head. Man, if I had known...shit...

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 21:29:24 2015 No.6965335 there's a guy with a thread on /ck/ saying he goes to 4$ chinese buffets

Anonymous Sun Oct 11 21:42:46 2015 No.6965367

>breakfast out with my wife and kids
>waitress comes over and pours me coffee
>coffee spills around the cup but waitress doesn't seem to notice
>I point it out to her
>she apologizes
not good enough bitch
>grab her by the throat
>pin her on table
>"spill" coffee on her chest to see how she likes it
>go back to drinking my coffee

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 21:46:43 2015 No.6965384 >>6962108 you did nothing wrong

Anonymous Sun Oct 11 21:52:59 2015 No.6965398

>attend boyfriend's family reunion at his aunt's huge, opulent cabin overlooking a lake
>everyone has autism or something, because no one talks to one another. Just sits around staring off into space, sometimes going outside to get a beer.
>boyfriend suddenly catches their autism, and instead of making me comfortable by introducing me to people and standing by me, he goes and sits on a couch without any room for me, and stares off into space like his family
>end up standing in a corner, trying to make small talk to people near me, but they just continue to act weird
>food is served, sits out on the counter
>no one touches it except for some shitty 4 year old who sucks her fingers before touching the food
>don't go for any food because it's rude to be the guest and be the first one to eat
>boyfriend still sitting on the fucking couch what the fuck you idiot
>decide to go outside and sit on the patio and drink some beers
>a few hours later, everyone starts to leave
>finally get to slink out, say a few awkward goodbyes
>walking to my car, the family lab zooms by with some children chasing after it, screaming
>the lab has a chicken by the neck, swinging it around
>get into the car, drive away as fast as possible
>boyfriend never says anything about it
>bring it up a year later and he admits he gets petrified around his family for whatever fucking reason
>haven't gone anywhere near his fucking strange family in 2 years

Holidays are pretty depressing because it's just the two of us most of the time, but Jesus Christ, at least we can eat and talk.

Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:02:49 2015 No.6965425
File: 621 KB, 480x270, 1444449847670.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>be neet
>go to carrabbas with 75 year old businessman no fun allowed father
>fucking love carrabbas
>they seat us under the a.c. vent, which is cool because I run hot anyway
>we get our minestrone soup and my dad tells the waiter to "get him a fuckin umbrella because I felt the ceiling drip"
>mouth "I'm so sorry" to the waiter

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:03:56 2015 No.6965429 >>6962090 U are retarded I understood it

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:04:03 2015 No.6965430 >>6962328 jesus, you bring your own rage today or you just fill up fast?

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:04:04 2015 No.6965431 File: 7 KB, 231x249, 1444273809900s.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6965398 >boyfriend Stopped reading there

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:05:04 2015 No.6965436 >>6962411 >your moms ARE fucking stupid

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:06:37 2015 No.6965442 >>6965425 What? Its uncomfortable to be under AC unit

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:08:14 2015 No.6965448 >>6965442 I love sitting under the a.c. >Tfw live in Florida where it's summer 13 months out of the year

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:09:27 2015 No.6965454 >>6965398 Be a cunt and saying having bf for 24 hours is sad. Fuck u bitch

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:10:39 2015 No.6965460 >>6964921 >another turkey is deep friend you guys go way back?

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:11:01 2015 No.6965462 >>6965448 I have been in Florida its not hell hot. Fuck u pussyfag

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:12:54 2015 No.6965470 >>6965454 >>6965462 wew

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:18:17 2015 No.6965486 >>6965367 Things never happened liar

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:23:55 2015 No.6965502 I thought the mini-drumstick looking pieces that come in bags of chicken wings were drumsticks, and that Americans were just dumb retards who called wings and drumsticks both 'wings'.

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:31:38 2015 No.6965524 File: 25 KB, 202x200, tmp_13579-1444526641945-678982449.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6964187

Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:31:44 2015 No.6965525

>>6964921
>Three different people bring turkey
>One on the turkeys was cooked earlier in the day and was left sitting on the counter for the whole rest of the day and is cold
>They put it back in the oven to heat it up and it gets dry as shit and is still cold inside

fucking hell

Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:41:29 2015 No.6965562
File: 75 KB, 375x500, Roscoes-Chicken.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>last leg of road trip before making 6 hour drive home
>first time going to Roscoe's
>hungover
>turns out later that I have the flu
>order tuna salad because not feeling well enough to eat fried chicken
>can't eat more than a third of it
>everyone else at the table promptly shames me for not finishing or getting doggy bag despite explanation that tuna won't be good after 6 hours in the car, they're going off about how people out there are starving etc
>someone else at the table says he'll take my leftovers and everyone acts like he's King fucking Arthur
>don't talk to many of those people anymore because who the fuck gets so mad about wasting a softball size amount of mediocre tuna salad

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:47:49 2015 No.6965597 >>6964921 Sounds a lot like my family. I appreciate that they have us over but it's all pre-packaged junk. People love when I bake but I think mostly it's because it's freshly made from scratch rather than premade or from a boxed mix.

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:54:33 2015 No.6965617 >>6965398 >instead of making me comfortable by introducing me to people and standing by me >me >me >me ABLOOBLOO SELFISH CUNT TEARS

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:56:38 2015 No.6965620 >>6965617 u wot m8 are you a barbarian? never had company over before? if its your family, it's your responsibility to introduce your girlfriend/guests to them. that poor girl's boyfriend is a fucking dumbass

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 22:57:53 2015 No.6965623 >>6965617 Cunta should not post their stupid sobbing stories

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 23:00:55 2015 No.6965630 >>6965562 >stomach too upset for chicken >eat fish instead What were you thinking?

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 23:01:51 2015 No.6965632 >>6965620 Stop white knighting

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 23:02:50 2015 No.6965634 >>6965623 I agree. Kunta Kinte should go back to his grave.

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 23:04:12 2015 No.6965640 >>6962036 >>6962054 If someone's parents can't tell a little kid not to order something expensive, or tell them to choose something else they have only themselves to blame.

Anonymous Sun Oct 11 23:11:44 2015 No.6965652

Fucking this chick. Is taking forever because I am prettier than her and on hydrocodone. After likje an hour she hops off, goes to the kitchen and comes back with readywhip. Gives enthusiastic shipped bj. I spray down her garbage intending to reciprocate, catch wiff of creamed tuna and vomit all over her pelvis.

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 23:12:58 2015 No.6965654 >>6965630 Tuna never bothers my stomach, but deep fried foods tend to give me indigestion.

>>	( •̀ω•́ ) Sun Oct 11 23:15:03 2015 No.6965657 >>6965486 Well aren't you just the sharpest little tool in the shed.

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 23:15:30 2015 No.6965659 File: 8 KB, 100x100, ghostie.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6962579 ex-fat although part of that was muscle because I was outside most of the time now its just all fat, just not as much of it

Anonymous Sun Oct 11 23:17:16 2015 No.6965665

18 and in some shit bar in Baltimore, got there before my friends did, so I belly up to the bar like it's a cowboy movie and look at the bottles on the shelf, order an O'Douls
>you uh know that's no alcohol beer, right?

"o-oh yeah! I know! I-i like to switch up and order one of those and one alcohol beer in turns so i don't get blasted"

bartender:

>okay...moving on

I drank my O'Douls alone, in silence

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 23:21:03 2015 No.6965672 >>6965652 are you me? the number of times I've had to inform a young lady she has a yeast infection or a severe case of lack of soap+washcloth is much higher than zero >and that is wrong >also you're gay >NTTAWWT

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 23:27:28 2015 No.6965688 Girls just wanna have fungus

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 23:28:05 2015 No.6965689 >>6965672 ....that's fucking awful I'd hang myself

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 23:31:38 2015 No.6965696 You should hang yourself anyway. If you haven't encountered blue cheese vag, you are not in the game.

>>	Anonymous Sun Oct 11 23:46:14 2015 No.6965727 >>6965689 I prefer the D If anything is wrong with my clam I sure as fuck wouldn't let a man down there that's just mean

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 00:02:39 2015 No.6965757 >>6965617 careful with that edge, kid

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 00:09:07 2015 No.6965771 >>6965654 >unable to eat oil soaked lean meat >able to eat oil soaked lean meat you're stomach is at the top of the food chain i see

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 00:17:15 2015 No.6965791 >>6965335 no one fucking cares

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 00:23:12 2015 No.6965807

>>6965617
You're a fucking idiot who has no sense of etiquette, I assume you also post frequently on /r9k/. Have fun being in a relationship with an animu character, I'm sure it's the only source of interaction you get on an average day due to your severe fucking autism, and it's with yourself and an inanimate object.

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 00:32:13 2015 No.6965830

>>6965632
>>6965617
are you literally retarded? If you bring a guest to a family or friend function wherein nobody knows your guest it is literally your responsibility to introduce your guest to them. it doesn't matter who that guest is, significant other, cousin, best friend from back home, your shy co-worker, whatever.
you guys are trolling right?
nobody's THAT autistic, right?

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 00:39:47 2015 No.6965850

>one time i bought a pizza when i was over at a friends house
>we left to go rent a game from hollywood video
>when we came back the pizza was gone
>his dog had eaten it
his dog lived but i was really hoping to eat it since it was from a good pizza place and was expensive

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 00:47:26 2015 No.6965873
File: 2.73 MB, 3216x2136, edamame-copy.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

> had just turned 21
> go out drinking with friend and his qt asian bride
> bride brings additional qt asian friend for me to talk to
> at nice bar
> they order drinks; I order a random beer, pretending that I know what it is and that it's one of my "personal favorites"
> ends up being super floral IPA, tastes like grass
> acting like I enjoy it, but I need food to get through this
> grab a menu
> everything is super expensive
> see edamame is only $4, had never tried it but remembered reading that it paired well with beer
> order it
> qt asians are pleased with choice, I'm feeling good
> edamame gets there
> I'm the first one to grab a pod
> toss the entire thing in my mouth
> start chewing and immediately realize something was wrong - tastes fibrous and inedible
> girls and friend giving me weird look
> I act like nothing is wrong
> Chew the pod into a fibrous ball and swallow
> My "date" leans in
> "Anon, aren't you not supposed to eat the shell...?"
> Realize that makes 100% sense
> Instead of saying that, I go into a ten minute lecture on the health benefits of eating the shell
> Other friend interjects, "but isn't it not edible?"
> "Oh no, that's a myth; our stomachs are surprisingly powerful."
> They try eating the shell
> All spit it out
> Amazed at how I can do it
> Go into a long description about how strong my teeth are and how I have a stomach like a cow (yeah I don't fucking know)
> Sit there the rest of the night chewing through edamame shells
> Literally shit fibers the next day

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 00:49:58 2015 No.6965880 >>6965873 8/10 made me laugh like marge simpson

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 00:55:17 2015 No.6965902 >>6964187 raw pancake batter is actually really good though

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 01:10:18 2015 No.6965935 >>6965771 How are you preparing your tuna if it's oil soaked? Sounds like you're fucking up tuna.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 01:42:47 2015 No.6966014 File: 91 KB, 1223x737, velocity.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] Think of a Flash themed coffee

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 01:45:15 2015 No.6966020 >>6965935 tuna salad = mayo + tuna Mayo = oil + eggs simple math brohemian rhapsody

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 01:54:07 2015 No.6966045 >>6965873 kek

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 02:17:41 2015 No.6966109 >>6965850 >have fresh pizza >leave it sitting around so it gets cold but... why?

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 02:22:29 2015 No.6966127 >>6965657 YOU'RE LOOKING KIND OF DUMB WITH YOUR FINGER AND YOUR THUMB IN THE SHAPE OF AN L ON YOUR FOREHEAD

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 02:30:05 2015 No.6966140 >>6966109 >pizza Don't you mean italian pudding?

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 02:59:24 2015 No.6966189 File: 138 KB, 375x375, 1398414204354.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6964187

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 03:32:48 2015 No.6966251 >>6966020 A tuna salad, you gigantic sperg. It is flaked tuna in a fucking leafy green salad. Jesus what a whopper of a mong you are

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 04:29:51 2015 No.6966300 >>6965672 >soap

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 04:38:02 2015 No.6966304

When I was a kid I went to a friends birthday party at McDonalds.
His mom asked us which happy meal we wanted and one friend wanted a Quarter Pounder combo.
She said "no, happy meals only".
He called her a bitch under his breath and we all thought he was a badass because of that.
Pretty cringey really.

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 04:43:52 2015 No.6966311

>>6962036
>Go to girlfriends family dinner of ~8 people
>Chinese restaurant
>They order some chinese set course meal
>Everything is nasty looking
>Turtle soup
>Jellyfish (cold)
>Shrimp (allergic and they know it)
>cold boiled soy sauce chicken
>weird mushrooms and a few other dishes
I tried some because they put it on my plate despite my refusal. Couldn't stomach a bite. Ended up ordering some fried chicken wings appetizer and had that with white rice.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 05:05:29 2015 No.6966334 File: 112 KB, 1060x404, my fase wen.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6964541

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 05:55:56 2015 No.6966381

>>6965326
I used to go over to my own poor friends house and just eat a ton. They had a George Foreman and always had a freezer full of shitty no-name patties. Every time my friends and I went over we'd eat like 4 of them each on whatever bread they had (sometimes buns but usually plain white bread).

They were so poor anon. And this was not the only way we wasted that family's money on a daily basis.

They eventually moved out of their apartment and into their grandmothers trailer.

...We did that.

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 06:47:51 2015 No.6966458

>Visit friend from out of town
>Go to an ice-cream boat at the harbour
>Never seen so many different flavours in my entire life
>Get 4 scoops, whipped cream and strawberry jam - gets expensive
>Prepare to pay
>Friend's dad intervenes and insists on paying
>ohgodwhydidigetthissuperexpensiveicecreamfuck.jpg

I wish he would have let me paid for it, I had a summer job and everything.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 08:48:18 2015 No.6966613 >>6965830 They were not wrong neither autistic. Dude we dont care about social fake facade of social normies

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 08:54:11 2015 No.6966618 >>6965873 Good post

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 09:04:41 2015 No.6966633 >>6962036 Same thing happened to me tbh. My friends mum served zucchini and I told her it tasted like dog shit.

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 09:41:04 2015 No.6966688

>>6965665
I think most people have embarrassing first-drink-type stories.

My first legal drink was with my parents and it was some frou-frou girly drink...a blue something or other than was more juices than booze, but I ordered it because it actually sounded like it'd be good (it was) and I didn't think scotch was appropriate for the timeframe.

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 09:45:16 2015 No.6966695

>>6965398
>it's rude to be the guest and be the first one to eat

Man, fuck that noise. Everyone's always afraid to be the first one to go at it, at this point I'm just like "Fuck it, I'll make the first move, not even waiting" otherwise nobody would dig in.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 10:07:07 2015 No.6966720 >>6965486 Like hell! I saw, and filmed, the whole fucking thing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N0Uin2sINdQ

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 10:11:46 2015 No.6966727

>be teenager
>rather picky eater
>eurofag
>visit my GF and spend a few days at her place with her parents cooking
>they cook traditional meals with lots of oil and things I don't like
>eat a bit just not to seem rude
>go out with my GF and eat something at Mickey D's so I'm not hungry
>they know and ask me why do I go and eat out when I have food at their place
She didn't know how to cook anything and I was a better cook than her even as a teenager. Go figure.

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 10:14:58 2015 No.6966733
File: 82 KB, 1200x795, doug.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>6965398
I fully expected this to turn into a story about cannibalism and/or demon worship.
Throw the words "ancient" and "eldritch" in there a few times and it's practically a Lovecraft story.

I'm just glad you got out of there alive, anon.

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 10:20:20 2015 No.6966736

>eat 3-5 meals a day
>mom hasn't cooked in 2 days
>go 7 hours without eating waiting for dinner
>she makes lobster
>oh boy smells good
>its fucking shit, never had it before. like warm ice/snow with a hint of fish-on-land smell that tastes only like the butter on it
>take 2 bites and discretely dispose of it
>she goes out of town and leaves lobster as leftovers
>ate 2 meals in 2 days

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 10:24:21 2015 No.6966742 >>6965398 >boyfriend Post pictures of your feet.

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 10:25:09 2015 No.6966744

>>6964921
My parents do shit like this, but on a mixed level. For instance, they make a great turkey.
>they actually get up at 5:00 am to start cooking it, baste it throughout the day, etc. It's great. Literally everything else is store bought or canned.
>be particular thanksgiving or Xmas, can't remember
>at best friends families house, we decide to just do a dinner between the two of us
>my parents bring store bought pie, it looks store bought and very meh
>No one eats it
>they take it home with them and probably got offended
>I should have said they could be in charge of turkey, but it wasn't at their house

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 10:27:06 2015 No.6966747

>>6965640
This.
But sadly parents these days are pussies who are afraid to contradict their own kids let alone those of others.
When I was a kid in the 80s and we went to birthdays or whatever the parents there would put the fucking food down if we misbehaved. Just like the other parents expected them to. You're not supposed to give a kid power over you just because it's not your own flesh and blood.

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 10:32:04 2015 No.6966756

>Japanese lab partner wants to get lunch before class, says he loves American food
>tell him about local cafes, steakhouses, fish market, authentic Hispanic and Chinese restaurants which aren't expensive or at all formal
>he just wants McDonald's
>legitimately enjoys eating plain McDonald's burger, it's his favorite food
I'll never understand

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 10:36:50 2015 No.6966767 >>6966756 I'm an American and see nothing wrong with eating McDonald's. Sometimes I get a real craving for it.

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 10:44:32 2015 No.6966781

>>6965562
Oh god this same shit happened to me over a fucking can of coke.

Went to my uncle's Greek friends' house for Christmas dinner, asked for coke to drink and didn't finish the entire can. Whole family flipped their fucking shit. I was told that kids these days don't know how fortunate they are and that if everyone these days is like me then humanity won't survive. The kids were fucking climbing over each other to finish the remaining few mouthfuls of coke. Never seen anything like it, and they're not even poor.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 10:47:49 2015 No.6966786 >>6966311 >weird mushrooms >turtle soup >shrimp Oh Lord THE HORROR. You poor Amerifat, the very idea of eating something other than burgers must've traumatised you so much. Do you have PTSD now?

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 10:53:01 2015 No.6966799 >Went to friend's house for Canadian Thanksgiving >Friend dumps out delicious turkey pan drippings and makes gravy from a package instead I cringed on her behalf. I didn't want to seem rude and step in to make the gravy, but holy shit. What a waste.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 10:59:01 2015 No.6966808 >>6966799 >Canadian found your problem

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 13:19:36 2015 No.6967039 >>6965335 It's weird that he lies about the price too. It's actually $7.99.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 13:25:11 2015 No.6967049 >>6964187 >underrated post

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 13:33:31 2015 No.6967079 >>6966808 >>6966799 this. Canadians are swine. honestly, especially if its thanksgiving, there snothing wrong with stepping in and saying "i got this" I hate boxed gravy. nothing is better than gravy made from real animal fats

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 13:40:08 2015 No.6967098 >>6966251 Not that guy, but when someone says tuna salad I think of the mayo and tuna mixture, similar to chicken salad. I would bet most people here think the same. Google image search tuna salad and tell me what you see

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 13:52:16 2015 No.6967128

>>6966311
beef onion mushroom type stuff is godlike

pepper mushroom black bean sauce whatever

its all got so much msg, oil salt and all that its all good.

Also you omitted some dishes I imagine you wouldn't eat just braised mix veg either.

fat ameriplebs.. eating the accommodation items like fried chicken wings is cringey

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 14:11:24 2015 No.6967161 >>6965652 >17 year old fat chick wants to "work on her dick sucking game" >once for the experience sure >promise her I'll eat her >peel back layers of fat, think better of it >she eggs my car All in all I'm happy with this.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 14:40:53 2015 No.6967249 >>6966799 >>6966808 >>6967079 Hey fug you guys. My family alway made gravy with the good stuff.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 14:55:34 2015 No.6967283 >>6966736 you couldn't fry up some eggs or something? if you were a kid ok, if not, what a fucking incomptetent autist

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 15:19:44 2015 No.6967335 Cool man

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 15:37:26 2015 No.6967377 File: 117 KB, 720x480, dbff02ffa0ea9b1d0143f11beb4446de-d5fn5ph[1].jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6967335

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 16:46:19 2015 No.6967576
File: 146 KB, 300x375, 1437297018029.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>6965431
>>6965454
>>6965617
>>6966742
>women trigger my autism
Too bad you can't take the meds your mother brings you without flailing in rage until she goes back up the basement steps.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 16:47:50 2015 No.6967577 >>6967576 feminist autism speaks

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 16:53:50 2015 No.6967587
File: 1.45 MB, 294x240, 1410661701343.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>6967577
>Being complacent in being a horrible human being because not having sperg fits makes you an sjw
You seem to be take pride in being mentally handicapped, perhaps autism speaks or /tumblr/ would suit you better.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 17:07:50 2015 No.6967619 >>6966786 Maybe he was just a kid? Kids are picky eaters, and new 'strange' food from another culture would totally set off some alarms. But no, that's too reasonable. Continue with your unprovoked hostile autism.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 17:16:53 2015 No.6967637 File: 12 KB, 163x170, 1373265737288.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6964187 best kek in a while.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 17:27:36 2015 No.6967670 >>6964187 Kind of fucked up the waitress took your bowl Like fuck off chick, if the boy wants to eat pancake batter let the boy eat pancake batter

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 17:48:35 2015 No.6967733 >>6965562 I don't really like wasting food. I've only sperged out about it once, but its because he got a call from work while we were eating and he left this $25 ramen bowl with all this extra shit he had barely eaten on the table.

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 17:59:27 2015 No.6967766

>>6962036
My sister and brother in laws wedding anniversary so we decided to go to this tea place my BIL likes. The place had a decent variety of teas but their food menus was god awful. Most of them were shitty stuff and I saw a pulled pork sandwich on the list so I get it, no coke or orange juice so instead of tea I got coffee.

The pulled pork had kimchi in it and the coffee was bitter as hell even after 2 cups of milk and several packets of sugar the shit didnt change taste. I didnt even eat all of it, worst thing about it all was that the bill was over $170 for 6 people. We all make good money so that wasnt a problem but worst food experience ever, for a place if you want only tea and a variety of teas then its ok albeit an expensive place for a small town.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 20:02:46 2015 No.6968167 >>6966781 U arrva wasteful anon. Now suck my dick for halt eaten sandwich

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 20:05:16 2015 No.6968173 >>6965830 Nobody has any obligation to introduce people. why so whiteknightbson? Enjoy your Stacy whore used cunt dripping wet by cheating on you

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 21:37:59 2015 No.6968451 >>6968173 Are you for real?

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 21:39:27 2015 No.6968459 >>6967377 Cool man

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 21:42:56 2015 No.6968465 >>6968173 I'm going to assume you're trolling and not just reaching new found depths of autismal, of course it is your responsibility to introduce your guest if you bring someone, otherwise how will anyone know who he is?

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 22:00:58 2015 No.6968519 >>6968465 Nope. Stop trying to impose normie stuff

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 22:17:49 2015 No.6968579 >>6966720 that's a great vid, anon.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 22:23:11 2015 No.6968597 >>6966756 He sounds like a total weeaboo. Dump his bitch ass and find another boyfriend.

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 22:57:37 2015 No.6968674

>2 thanksgivings ago
>have small party
>i dont invite anyone since all my friends are my roomates
>one roomate invites a chick i was crushing on hard
>said chick had already rejected me
>cook up a storm, shitloads of good food
>crush arrives
>shit is awkward
>everyone eating food and saying how good it is
>im stonefaced and autistic af and go to my room "because i dont feel well"
>didn't even eat anything yet
>spend all day in my room with the door locked

this thanksgiving is setting up to be a repeat, just with a different cast

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 23:01:28 2015 No.6968685 >>6968519 >normie >regular human interaction I guess if that's what you're implying, neither of us are wrong.

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 23:04:19 2015 No.6968693

>>6966799
>Canadian Thanksgiving

>thanks britain for letting us slurp up your rancid cum

>thanks snow for freezing us

>thanks shitskins for ruining every major city

>thanks for the pisswater that is tim hortons coffee

>thanks for quebec

tbh fam you should just pretend your american and do american thanksgiving

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 23:08:01 2015 No.6968702 >>6962804 >Shannon, Coleen, I'm sorry, you guys were fun (and qt). Weird, I knew some qt sisters whose names were also Shannon and Colleen.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 23:09:36 2015 No.6968708 >>6962096 that's still not the same thing.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 23:13:14 2015 No.6968713 >>6962477 >Hardees It's called Carl's Jr., you inbred retarded midwestern hick

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 23:29:07 2015 No.6968772 >>6966756 >Hispanic >Chinese >"American" Cultureless Ameriplebs, wwtl?

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 23:40:46 2015 No.6968818 >>6966736 >like warm ice/snow with a hint of fish-on-land smell that tastes only like the butter on it wut

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 23:44:37 2015 No.6968825

>thanksgiving at cousins house
>aunt is a godless whore can't stand a thing about her
>big ass family so multiple turkeys
>approach a strange looking platter
>something dark and dense and sitting in a brown gel-like substance
>poke at it with serving fork
>cut off a slice
>turns out it was literally the driest and most depressing piece of roast beef

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 23:51:58 2015 No.6968840 >>6965632 >>6968173 >white knight >>>/b/

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 23:54:07 2015 No.6968847
File: 52 KB, 500x299, 0948951620.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>6962054
>>6962061
>>6962074
>>6962078
>>6962084
>>6962090
>>6962092
>>6962096
>>6962100
>>6962112
>>6962115
>>6962118
>>6962122
>>6962155
>>6962195
>>6962411
>>6962428
>>6962433
>>6962460
>>6962465
>>6962629
wow /ck/, i'm pretty sure these two single-handedly out autismed every other board

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 23:55:25 2015 No.6968851

>>6966720
>10 or some shit i dunno
>watch a lot of iron chef and other food network shows and considered myself to be a foodie
>also just a pretentious shit head in general
>family goes out to nice italian restaurant
>i look for what dish would impress the chef that i ordered (clearly the knowledge of someone so young, yet so refined would catch wind!)
>get the duck with farro and some sort of greens or whatever
>then after get espresso with an orange biscotti or something i dunno
>before the waitress leaves the table i stop her and say "GIVE MY COMPLIMENTS TO THE CHEF" and do the kiss finger fucking thing
>awkward silence as she is probably just trying to pay bills and doesn't really give a fuck about FOOD LIKE ME
>judgement
>this is not how i thought it would go
>self awareness
>mental downfall
>despair

i am sure i have many more experiences like this throughout my life, but i have suppressed them too deeply.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 23:56:34 2015 No.6968853 >>6968847 >two But I was one of those posts and only one of them.

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 23:58:10 2015 No.6968858 File: 74 KB, 512x384, ralph.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6967049 >>underrated post >post has more than 1 reply will you faggots look up what underrated is?

>>	Anonymous Mon Oct 12 23:58:36 2015 No.6968860 >>6968847 ur mom single-handedly out autismed every other board

Anonymous Mon Oct 12 23:58:40 2015 No.6968861

>>6968851
the post i was originally going to reply to was in regards to was about the psa and how i got caught up in watching them for about 40 minutes
forgot that i was going to do that before i decided to tell my tale
MYSTERY SOLVED FOR THOSE WHO WERE BAFFLED
THANK YOU YOU'RE WELCOME

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 00:00:03 2015 No.6968865 >>6968855 If anything probably the opposite is true, but enjoy your shitty cardboard pizza. Also there's already a cringe thread up >>6962036

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 00:01:03 2015 No.6968866 >>6968853 cool man

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 00:03:39 2015 No.6968871 File: 134 KB, 500x333, 56.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6964187 I haven't burst out laughing from a story like that in a long time, thanks anon.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 00:05:17 2015 No.6968876 >>6968693 Are you American? You sound American.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 00:14:38 2015 No.6968898 >dine with friends >friend's boyfriend is an asshole >bigger asshole to waitresses >always leave a 40%+ tip to make up for his stupidity It's like he thinks the waitress runs the restaurant or should give a single fuck about him

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 00:14:55 2015 No.6968900 >>6968847 /tg/ here, randomly saw this on the front page When the fuck did /ck/ become /v/?

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 00:15:57 2015 No.6968902 >>6965873 looks like green beans sprinkled with meth

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 00:16:56 2015 No.6968904 >>6968900 Every 4chan board is like that on occasion, dude. You probably need to spend more time on /tg/

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 00:20:05 2015 No.6968914 >>6967098 Americans being handicapped

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 00:20:22 2015 No.6968916 >>6968861 relax, nobody cares

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 00:25:58 2015 No.6968925 >>6968898 >40%+ tip Jeez.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 00:29:40 2015 No.6968929 >>6968925 I know, it's a lot, but don't eat at anywhere too fancy/expensive with him (to avoid scenes), so an extra couple bucks is a compensation.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 00:38:09 2015 No.6968945 >>6967098 What's wrong with calling them tuna mayo and chicken mayo. And using the word salad for things that involve lettuce and such.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 00:57:48 2015 No.6968973 >>6968904 same thing happened to me tbh I spent some time on /tg/ and I really liked it

>>	( •̀ω•́ ) Tue Oct 13 00:59:19 2015 No.6968976 >>6966127 umadbro?

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 00:59:37 2015 No.6968978 >>6962108 >>6962477 First like 20 posts and only 2 of them are on topic smh fam same thing happened to me tbh

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 01:04:00 2015 No.6968992 >>6967766 Pulled pork and kimchi is awesome, but why the hell would they serve it at a tea place.

>>	( •̀ω•́ ) Tue Oct 13 01:28:55 2015 No.6969038 >>6965850 >his dog lived but i was really hoping to eat it thats a shame, has it died yet if so how did it taste?

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 01:45:55 2015 No.6969068 >>6968992 >tea place Bubble tea you moron

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 02:00:01 2015 No.6969090 >>6967766 I will never understand why restaurants feel the need to fuck with pulled pork. It's tried and true, you don't have to add on to it. Adding retarded bullshit like kimchi or fried "onions" or cole slaw on top doesn't improve it.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 02:17:15 2015 No.6969118 File: 18 KB, 228x198, 1385849723266.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6969090 >cole slaw on top doesn't improve it You absolutely fucking what m8

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 02:28:27 2015 No.6969149 >>6966786 He's allergeric to shrimp. I don't blame him for not eating jellyfish, though. But fuck him for not eating turtle soup.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 02:43:40 2015 No.6969177 >>6969118 It's better on the side.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 02:45:35 2015 No.6969180 >>6969118 Some places go overboard with extra filling and plop more slaw than you need. Putting it on the side allows for better portion control on the customer's side.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 02:45:54 2015 No.6969182 >>6965873 my dad eats the shells sometimes

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 03:11:43 2015 No.6969222
File: 40 KB, 400x534, old matrix guy.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>6968851
>>self awareness
>>mental downfall
>>despair
yeah yeah yeah i have that feeling probably once a day anon. once a day, every day since puberty started. i'm 28 now. hello darkness my old friend...

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 03:45:48 2015 No.6969270 >>6969222 Nice trips, lord of the rings guy

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 03:48:51 2015 No.6969277 >>6962804 >eat rice with hands there is nothing wrong with this

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 04:30:00 2015 No.6969326 >>6969182 Nobody gives a shit about your dad

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 07:47:47 2015 No.6969581 File: 146 KB, 630x495, tumblr_nw2lgbnMda1uhxubfo1_1280.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6962804

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 08:37:25 2015 No.6969666 File: 68 KB, 638x554, 8.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] Just unintentionally brought candy with me into the restroom for the first time and ate it while I took a piss

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 08:39:46 2015 No.6969670
File: 33 KB, 403x312, whipmeup.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>6965873
I would have just said as soon as I noticed the shell was inedible "Dangit my tongue isn't dextrous enough, thought I could pry the goodness from the casing with just my tongue"

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 08:41:57 2015 No.6969673 >>6969670 yes saying that your tongue is really bad at being dexterous is the best way to impress a lady

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 08:43:16 2015 No.6969675 >>6969182 and soon your dad will be dead.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 08:51:24 2015 No.6969685 >>6965367 Wait... this sounds familiar...

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 10:43:03 2015 No.6969835 >>6968898 Leaving a huge tipis pretty stupid. Kilk urself idiot

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 10:54:43 2015 No.6969861 File: 50 KB, 640x480, 1434815752008.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6962054 >>6962061

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 11:01:52 2015 No.6969873 >>6967049 LE UPBOAT

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 11:06:57 2015 No.6969880 >>6965326 you still dont like steak because youre a man child and your mom cooks it for you but she cooks it poorly? move out faggot

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 11:09:38 2015 No.6969887 >>6965757 there was nothing edgy about that comment it was just stupid. nice buzzword, kid

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 11:23:11 2015 No.6969907

>>6969880
Fine with steak if we go out because "professional" cooks trim it better.

>move out faggot
Literally can't. I'm a caretaker for my parents, doing the things they can't do themselves because they're so much older (cooking is okay for Mom because she can sit and take her time) such as most chores one would do on his or her own like shopping, laundry, yardwork. Then there's the other stuff I have to do like washing/cleaning and dressing and medicating them which I absolutely hate doing and really wish they'd just hire a medical professional to do but Dad's always been "frugal" (unless it comes to something he wants personally, then money's no object).

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 11:26:31 2015 No.6969916 >>6969907 your dad spends his money on the things he wants? what a fucking asshole

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 11:59:41 2015 No.6969993

A disgusting pizza place a block south from Washington Square Park and NYU, friends, a got a slice, first and last time, it was so dripping with grease that it went right into the garbage can. As a poor HS kid with the munchies even I had to throw that away.
YUK.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 12:01:03 2015 No.6969995 >>6969993 ... that's just not a good area for food, the NYU people are too stupid to know any better.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 12:31:51 2015 No.6970053 >>6967619 I sought out turtle soup when I was eight stfu he's a pleb, fat american. It's just the culture down there to be an idiot and uncultured

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 12:35:07 2015 No.6970063

>>6967766
dang wtf.. I'm sure they had plenty good to pair with tea. The fact you put sugar and fat in coffee is already disgusting. What you perceived as bitterness was probably just the palate you ruined with coke drinking half decent strong black coffee.

Pulled pork is great with kimchi. You can make pulled pork with the brine you'd make kimchi with and vice versa, ofc they go together.

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 12:37:08 2015 No.6970067

>>6968519
I sorta agree with this anon though I would have introduced her to my family. Mostly because I want them to get along.

However they are obviously all autismal and if they would prefer to not get along, then it's too much work to try and convince them otherwise. But then I wouldn't have bothered to see them for the holidays either.

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 12:43:26 2015 No.6970081

>>6968898
I overtip if someone unfairlt undertips but

>as if waitress should give a fuck about him

Um yes? That's the point of being a server. Even if he's rude all night she has to bring him what he asks and check up on him while being polite and courteous to him all night. That's customer service, you do your job and look past how idiotic and rude most people are.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 13:47:12 2015 No.6970238 >>6968674 No dude... if she rejected you, that is kind of awkward for your bro to invite her over for a holiday in which you did all the cooking. I wouldn't hide in my room if I were you, don't let this year be the same.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 13:58:28 2015 No.6970266 >>6965672 >soap no wonder your girl has yeast infections

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 13:59:55 2015 No.6970270

>>6970063
>The fact that you put sugar and fat in coffee is already disgusting.

Except that is a common convention, more so than drinking it black...

You talk about palate, and a pulled pork sandwich.
You are talking about palate, and a korean-american fusion item that sits at the bottom level of their menu with regard to food cost.

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 14:07:02 2015 No.6970283

>>6970270
>not drinking it black
amongst mongrels, people who want caffeine and sugar should drink a coke only that's less acceptable in the mornings so they disguise it. If you want coffee why ask for a cup of cream and sugar to mask the taste? Just drink chocolate milm I'm sure you'll prefer it.

Cheap items are often simple, but still fine. Two pieces of toast, pulled spicy pork and kimchi thats fine.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 14:10:05 2015 No.6970295 >>6969907 >Literally can't. then call the police, that's illegal

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 14:11:21 2015 No.6970300 >>6970238 yeah but i was the idiot for asking out a woman in my social circle

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 14:17:35 2015 No.6970314 >>6965448 There's only 12 months in a year. Holy shitballs Americunts are stupid... >>6965460 >deep frying a turkey What the fuck is wrong with you?

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 14:21:58 2015 No.6970324 >>6970283 I'll reiterate for you. >They don't like what I like, they are clearly wrong. >Food pairings.... Korean/American BBQ sandwich. You don't work in hospitality do you man?

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 14:28:08 2015 No.6970343 >>6970314 It was irony stupid cuck

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 14:30:29 2015 No.6970348

>>6970314
>Doesn't understand hyperbole.

>>6970300
You're not an idiot for doing that. A lot of people have done the same thing in your shoes. Read the signs man, if they seem interested in you, then you go for it. Don't just melt over a girl because she is one of your friends.

Keep cooking, and don't ever let your past decisions haunt you if you can learn from them anon. I'll stop preaching now.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 14:36:39 2015 No.6970360 >>6970348 nah mang, i thought the signs were there but i couldn't make it to the end zone i think i'm just gonna focus on the food this year

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 14:51:46 2015 No.6970401
File: 115 KB, 402x511, I've lost control of my life.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Dad wants to treat the family to an Indian meal
>Decides we're going to the pub first
>The bar staff know he's an alcoholic so they keep asking him if he wants another as soon as he gets half way through a pint
>He says "You don't need to eat if you've had enough to drink"
>We finally manage to get him the fuck out of there and to the restaurant
>He's totally drunk by this point
>Keeps ordering beer at the restaurant while drunkenly trying to explain the cricket scores to the waiters
>One of the waiters says "Yes boss". Dad gets really offended by it for some reason and complains really loudly.
>Complains that his vindaloo isn't hot enough
>Says something about "fucking pakis"
>Rest of us sitting there with this face
>Never went there again

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 14:55:25 2015 No.6970413 >>6966311 Theres no such thing as allergies. It's all in your head.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 15:23:04 2015 No.6970503 >>6969995 NYUfag here, plenty of solid places within 5-10 minutes walking. If you to go meme places like artichokes or bens, probably going to have a bad time.

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 15:42:04 2015 No.6970551
File: 28 KB, 422x560, Feminism_and_Drinking.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>6965640
Depends on nationality. I'm 22 and come from first generation spics and my mum who grew up in east LA would bring the hammer down on any kid who would order something outlandish, especially us.

But we rarely go out. She's a decent cook who loves Italian so it was mainly Mexican or Italian growing up

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 15:54:08 2015 No.6970601
File: 47 KB, 506x316, uncle-junior-sopranos.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>6962036

>Uncle comes in from out of town
>I'm taking everybody out to dinner!
>about 6 of us
>well where should we go?
>Chilis!
>TGIF!
>Applebees!
>Taco Bell!
>Ruby Tuesdays!
>Logans Steak House!
>Outback!
>we all keep shouting different restaurant names
>Howard Johnsons!
>Stuckeys!
>IHOPs!
>Pizza Hut!
>Uncle starts to get pissed
>we continue
>Golden Corral!
>Famous Daves!
>Red Robin!
>Boston Chicken!
>Sbarros!
>Cheese Cake Factory!
>Uncle is truly pissed
>grabs left arm, eyes glaze over, falls to floor
>Call 911
>EMT's arrive
>open the door
>get on the floor
>everybody walk the dinosaur

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 16:04:58 2015 No.6970633 File: 27 KB, 500x331, tumblr_mw30h16JoO1rmgl01o1_500.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6970551 That poster be triggerin'

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 16:15:00 2015 No.6970679 File: 90 KB, 1297x880, 8.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6966786 Careful with that edge

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 16:34:02 2015 No.6970725 >>6962036 >>6962575 >>6962054 >>6962460 same thing happened to me tbh friends mom took us to eat in a restaurant and i tried the 72oz steak challenge. i took two bites did a 360 and moonwalked out of there.

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 16:42:32 2015 No.6970744
File: 100 KB, 560x554, 024-tour-of-duty-theredlist.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>6969277
>there is nothing wrong with this
what are you? the fucking NVA eating out of wooden bowls because youre too poor to afford a fork or a spoon? fuck off commie.

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:03:56 2015 No.6970817
File: 41 KB, 480x640, 888.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>6968693
>>thanks for quebec
>thanks for poutine
>thanks for montreal steak
>thanks for montreal smoked meat
>thanks for montreal jew bagels
>thanks for montreal style hot dogs
>thanks for the M-1 Garand
thanks for nothing ameriswine, we gave you the best service rifle in ww2 and all you could do was lose the race for berlin to russian subhumans.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:07:44 2015 No.6970825 >>6970817 >M-1 Garand >Best service rifle Not even close.

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:09:13 2015 No.6970832 [DELETED]

>>6970360
>nah mang, i thought the signs were there but i couldn't make it to the end zone
so fucking what, just own that shit. if you dont own up to your fuckups now you wont ever fuck up enough to learn enough to succeed and get the pussy you want.

step the fuck up betafag, if she likes your cooking she will also like your cock, when you eat together make sure to match your pace and finish when she finishes, its a metaphorical parallel to fucking her(satisfying her bodily needs).

thank me later cucklord.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:11:06 2015 No.6970836 >>6970825 >Not even close. name a better service rifle fielded in ww2, gewehr isnt an option it wasnt mass produced.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:11:45 2015 No.6970837 >>6970817 all that shit is shit except for the garand garand was american btw

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:12:40 2015 No.6970839 File: 79 KB, 601x602, 1395531140468.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6970837 >garand was american btw

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:15:47 2015 No.6970851 >>6970839 >moved to america as a child >lived in america for almost his entire life >worked for american government

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:16:00 2015 No.6970853 >>6970832 >0% Experience. >100% Opinion. Good luck little buddy.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:18:08 2015 No.6970857 File: 1.20 MB, 2448x3264, 1430580208509.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6970851 >born in canada to canadian parents checkmate amerifats

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:21:18 2015 No.6970864 >>6970857 he wasn't a canadian when he invented the rifle though

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:23:08 2015 No.6970868 >>6970864 >he wasn't a canadian when he invented the rifle though he was born and died canadian who sold his design to america cause you fags suck at making service firearms yourselves(see the hunk of shit browning BAR).

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:25:10 2015 No.6970874 >>6970868 lel whatever lets you sleep at night m8 not all of us need to grasp at straws

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:27:10 2015 No.6970883 >>6966300 you are not supposed to use this

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:29:26 2015 No.6970893 >>6970868 >>>/k/ Not /ck/ Somehow this thread started looking like /pol/ before it devolved into the M1's heritage...

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:31:04 2015 No.6970898 File: 22 KB, 480x360, 1438164633742.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6970874 stay mad you plebs cant even dress yourselves without an instruction manual let alone design a decent service rifle. now fuck off i got work to do

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 17:38:06 2015 No.6970924 >>6970898 >posting an american actor

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 18:50:53 2015 No.6971187 >>6970601 omg are you being paid to list all those stupid restaurant names seriously

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 18:57:35 2015 No.6971203
File: 234 KB, 391x550, fml.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>be about 13 years old
>huge family wedding
>literally every family relative on the face of the earth comes together to this fancy ass traditional restaurant
>mum wants to make an impression on other family members
>decides it's a good idea to dress me up in traditional clothes
>fml.jpeg
>get placed at kids table with a bunch of 5-8 year-old cousins
>decide to hang out outside in the garden by myself
>only go back in when food is served
>spend the rest of my day constantly being pestered by customers thinking I work there because I'm wearing traditional clothes
>mfw I must have aged 20 years because of grief because nobody can tell I'm 13

either that or I was a really old looking teenager

Anonymous Tue Oct 13 19:33:49 2015 No.6971314
File: 2.36 MB, 320x287, 984615.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>went to a Thai place with wife and 5-6 friends
>had never eaten Thai food before
>also hadn't eaten in almost 24 hours; was starving
>we order like 7 different dishes; with giant potions to share
>food finally comes
>couldn't eat any of it
>like literally couldn't even swallow it
>absolutelydisgusting.jpeg
>still famished; can feel my stomach eating up excess fat reserves
>go to Vietnamese takeout place next door while wife and friends continue eating
>get 2 pork Bahn Mi sandwiches
>Vietnamese place isn't dine in, only takeout
>try to walk back into Thai place to rejoin my group
>owner yells at me and won't allow me to come in with outside food
>sit outside on curb and eat the 2 sandwiches
>rejoin my group inside and sit in silence as they finish their meal
>wife yells at me when we get home for embarrassing her in front of friends
>mfw

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 19:42:49 2015 No.6971336 >>6971314 Pad Thai is the bomb dot com dude, what are you on about. I would have been embarrassed too; you couldn't find one thing you liked out of 7 dishes?

>>	Wait, what? !!8QSg4Z8LtwO Tue Oct 13 19:50:22 2015 No.6971353 >>6971336 >bomb dot com get out of here, Guy Fieri

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 20:03:02 2015 No.6971370 >>6971353 its like you dont want to be a lean mean kidney bean in flavortowns chili con carne.

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 20:45:28 2015 No.6971477 >>6971314 Was this in east la/alhambra?

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 21:01:00 2015 No.6971517 >>6967249 >his flag is a leaf

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 21:05:23 2015 No.6971528 >>6971336 Not him but Thai food is pretty crap except maybe green curry. And I have enjoyed every other cuisine I've eaten (an absolute shitload)

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 22:37:44 2015 No.6971767 >>6962054 same thing happened to me tbh friends mom took us to eat in a restaurant and same thing happened to me tbh

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 22:43:56 2015 No.6971784 >>6962804 The dad sounds like a fucking faggot, you were a little kid for crying out loud

>>	Anonymous Tue Oct 13 22:53:14 2015 No.6971816 >>6971314 Thai food is fucking amazing and out of 7 dishes you didn't like one? Either a shitty restaurant or you're an autistic picky eater. >bringing in outside food Toddler tier behavior tbh

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 00:36:01 2015 No.6972036 >>6968876 haha butthurt

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 07:10:05 2015 No.6972669 >>6968579 its all yours

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 07:26:56 2015 No.6972682 >>6969673 Not a problem at wll "Well I guess I need something softer to practice on then" :)

>>	TomatoGlazed Wed Oct 14 08:11:47 2015 No.6972723 >>6968851 >GIVE MY COMPLIMENTS TO THE CHEF holy fuck anon I laughed so hard. Thanks for living

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 08:25:23 2015 No.6972731 >>6962108 Sounds like you won.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 08:34:09 2015 No.6972739 >>6970898 Cool man

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 08:39:16 2015 No.6972744 >>6967128 I had a mushroom at a Chinese buffet that tasted like moldy wood soaked in piss. I don't trust the Chinese with anything but chicken and rice now. I love button mushrooms. Fried with a little bit or garlic powder, probably my favorite food.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 10:32:15 2015 No.6972928 >>6965665 That bartender sounds like a cunt though How the fuck are you gonna judge somebody for ordering something you serve there

Anonymous Wed Oct 14 10:55:15 2015 No.6972967

>At girlfriends families house
>Her mother makes a big salad for dinner
>serve some onto my plate
>literally just tastes like salt, not exaggerating just salt alone, it was so powerful
>regret serving myself so much salad
>decide to get it out the way fast
>chomping down on it quickly trying to ignore the salt
>"oh the salad is a bit salty" her mother points out
>continue eating it thinking it was just a small comment and me being weird and it is not as salty to them as it is to me
>finish my salad
>"wow you finished so fast anon"
>neither of them had touched theirs after realizing how salty and un-edible it was
>she throws it away and makes another meal quickly
>don't have to put salt on my food for the next few days because of the lingering taste

Anonymous Wed Oct 14 13:27:08 2015 No.6973330

>little kid at a sleepover
>friend has siblings
>parents bring dinner
>gives small food portions of grilled chicken from vons or something
>everyone only eats one plate
>still starving
>I ask for seconds
>"wow anon, you're a big eater!"
>eat and wonder why it was small to begin with
>playing video games with him later and then it hits me
>he lives in a trailer park
>I didn't know that means he's poor but I didn't think about it until now
>feel guilty the entire time
>never hang out at his place again

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 13:33:49 2015 No.6973349 >>6972744 Maybe it was marinated in Chinese Coca Cola.

Anonymous Wed Oct 14 13:46:54 2015 No.6973372

>>6962804
>i ate like a little piggy when i was small
>with hands, shit smeared all over face
>smacking lips, snorting to breathe with a full mouth, choking and coughing
>my mom tried to correct this by mocking me
>imitating me as though i were looking in a mirror
>i now do this myself
>to the children of perfect strangers
>i've done this at public school pot lucks
>restaurants
>street fairs
>church gatherings

I've actually been assaulted because of this.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 13:48:28 2015 No.6973375 File: 613 KB, 4288x2848, Hardee's Street.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6968713 go look at the sign you fucking idiot

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 13:52:47 2015 No.6973383 >>6968713 >Carl's Jr. Fuck you, I'm eating!

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:03:52 2015 No.6973408 File: 70 KB, 960x628, USA.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6970868 What service rifle do you now use, and what is your primary fighter aircraft?

Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:06:04 2015 No.6973416

>>6973349
>friends take me to place called islands
>mostly burgers and stuff
>friend orders appetizer called cheesy fries
>oh man that sounds good I'll get some too
>friends say nothing
>waiter comes
>Friend order cheesy fries
>I ask waiter for another order of them
>he gives me weird look but says sure and leaves
>friends start laughing and saying how I must be really hungry
>wat.jpg
>waiter comes back with two GIANT FUCKING PLATES OF CHEESY FRIES
>one plate would have been plenty for the three of us
>end up asking for a box for my untouched plate of cheesy fries
>car smelled like cheesy fries for a week

Fuck cheesy fries

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:09:08 2015 No.6973425 >>6973383 Fuck you! That is my big ass fries and brawndo!

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:09:15 2015 No.6973426 >>6968519 /r9k/ pls go >and they wonder why they are friendless.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:11:02 2015 No.6973431 >>6973408 >The Colt Canada C7 rifle is a Canadian assault rifle

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:14:31 2015 No.6973437 File: 1.75 MB, 700x358, 1408804529816.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6973431 >answers half the question >gets it wrong

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:25:17 2015 No.6973468 >>6964187 One of the best thing I've read for a while.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:27:10 2015 No.6973474 >>6965632 >Fucking white knights, always stopping me from being a cunt to people just for being women. It's just not fair.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:27:28 2015 No.6973476 >>6971203 but what kind of traditional clothes, anon?

Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:32:17 2015 No.6973487

>Tuesday night, mom works late so me and my dad are on our own
>decide to go to earls (slightly fancy place)
>dad orders ribs with warm potato salad, I have my usual salad
>food comes, dad is so amazed with this fancy potato salad, everything is great
> waitress comes back to check on us
Then it happened ;_;
>my dad says it's really good, then looks the waitress in the eye and says in a really serious voice "the warm potato salad is better than sex"
>waitress and I can't even
>she manages to sputter out that she'll pass his compliments to the chef
>i turn 1000 shades of red
>try to tell him how weird that was
>he just keeps saying how good this potato salad is

Anyway, the waitress comes back to take our plates, and I apologized on his behalf. Still get embarrassed thinking about it to this day.
Tldr: my dad really likes warm potato salad

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:32:32 2015 No.6973488 File: 43 KB, 400x398, ayLaXAp.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6966613 >Dude we dont care about social fake facade of social normies

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:34:07 2015 No.6973493 >>6973426 Its better that way than been hypocrite like normies do

Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:34:47 2015 No.6973496
File: 28 KB, 500x333, 1444781578556.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>6965850
One time I got a novelty two-pound Snickers bar for Christmas. A few weeks later I opened it, took a bite, set it on a table and forgot about it before heading to work. My fucking chihuahua ate the entire damn thing.
I know because I got to clean the puke and shit. Sure looked like two pounds. Plus the wrapper was in shreds and I still haven't located the rest of the bar.

Anyway I'm just thankful she's okay and I don't feel an obligation to eat 3000 calories of candy.

Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:37:18 2015 No.6973504

>>6970401
>The bar staff know he's an alcoholic so they keep asking him if he wants another as soon as he gets half way through a pint

What fucking shithole do you live in?
Here the place would lose their alcohol serving license in a heart beat if stuff like that came out.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:38:40 2015 No.6973510 >>6973375 It dependa if location

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:38:58 2015 No.6973512 >>6962108 That's more funny than cringe-worthy. :-) Understandable misunderstanding.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:39:59 2015 No.6973515 >>6973383 Idiocracy referente in 4chan

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:43:11 2015 No.6973525 >>6970825 >baiting this hard

Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:43:16 2015 No.6973526
File: 143 KB, 600x400, 15-in-n-out-4x4-burger-In-N-Out-Burger-secret-menu-items.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Dad stories

> Go through In-N-Out drive-thru with dad
> Famished, so order a 4x4
> Drive-thru window person responds, "Wow, a 4x4?!"
> Dad responds, "My son likes the meat!" and then starts making grunting caveman noises
> "....that'll be $11.23 at the next window, sir."

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:44:33 2015 No.6973527 >>6973487 Standard dad tier social interaction imo.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:44:41 2015 No.6973528 >>6973526 You hace a cool dad

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:45:35 2015 No.6973531 >>6973526 Christ almighty I would kill myself

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:46:44 2015 No.6973536 >>6973531 >getting this embarrassed by an obvious dad joke >being so egotistical you think the cashier will even remember it in half an hour, let alone ever recognize you again

Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:46:57 2015 No.6973538

>>6966311
One time I took my gf to a Chinese bistro because I heard it was good and cheap.
I ordered a goat casserole because I suddenly really wanted to know what goat tasted like. I was expecting Murrican casserole, where you ruin meat with pounds of cheese, but instead it wound up being more of a clat pot thing. Full of mushrooms (like four different kinds I was too American to identify), delicious goat, bland as usual tripe, and bamboo bits. It was weird and off-putting at first, but by the end I was nearly licking the pot.

What I'm saying is don't freak out when you find yourself in a Temple of Doom, chilled monkey brains situation. Lots of popular foreign foods can surprise you. Turtle soup is fucking delicious, man.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:47:14 2015 No.6973539 >>6973496 how didn't your dog die I'm pretty sure there is chocolate in snickers and that that shit is poisonous to dogs

Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:47:30 2015 No.6973542

>girlfriends grandma always cooks for the family
>huge portions of authentic Mexican food
>she loves me because I always eat several plates of her food and tell her how great it is
>one day she asks me if I ever tried her tuna
>tell her that I can't really eat tuna because it makes me nauseas
>insists that her tuna is different and I have to try it
>she makes tuna
>I get a really small serving of it to not be rude
>she is visibly annoyed because I usually eat big servings
>smell is already driving me nuts
>force down my plate
>she tells me to get seconds
>lie and say I ate beforehand but it was really good im just not hungry today
>she knows im full of shit
She wouldn't talk to me for like a week after that

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:48:45 2015 No.6973544 >>6973536 How old were you Corny dad humor always embarrassed me when I was young, but never to that extent

Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:50:36 2015 No.6973549 [DELETED]

File: 38 KB, 640x430, cheddar-cheese_5.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>6973526

> At shitty diner in the middle of nowhere
> Order sloppy shit-tier chili burger
> Dad orders cheeseburger with cheddar
> Gets his burger
> Bites into it
> Calls the waiter over
> "This is not cheddar. This is American. I ordered cheddar."
> Waiter apologizes, takes burger, brings it back with new cheese.
> Dad takes another bite, calls the waiter back over
> "This is still American."
> Waiter getting flustered
> Goes back to chicken
> Gets slice of uncooked cheese, shows my dad, "See?! See?! This is cheddar?!"
> Dad takes cheese
> Bends it in half both ways
> "Do you see how it's not breaking? You can't do that with cheddar cheese."
> Waiter red faced "well, that's all we have"
> Dad smiles and tells the guy it's okay, and that he just wanted to establish that it wasn't cheddar
> Waiter walks away
> Dad turns to me, leans in
> "This isn't cheddar."

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:53:00 2015 No.6973556 >>6973526 Is your dad Tim Allen?

Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:53:58 2015 No.6973562
File: 38 KB, 640x430, cheddar-cheese_5.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

> At shitty diner in the middle of nowhere
> Order sloppy shit-tier chili burger
> Dad orders cheeseburger with cheddar
> Gets his burger
> Bites into it
> Calls the waiter over
> "Excuse me, this is not cheddar. This is American."
> Waiter apologizes, takes burger, brings it back with new cheese.
> Dad takes another bite, calls the waiter back over
> "Excuse me, this is still American"
> Waiter getting flustered
> Goes back to kitchen
> Gets slice of uncooked cheese, shows my dad, "See?! See?! This is cheddar?!"
> Dad takes cheese
> Bends it in half both ways
> "Now, do you see how it's not breaking? You can't do that with cheddar cheese."
> Waiter red faced "well, that's all we have"
> Dad smiles and tells the guy it's okay, and that he just wanted to establish that it wasn't cheddar
> Waiter walks away
> Dad turns to me, leans in, whispers
> "Anon... this isn't cheddar."

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:56:11 2015 No.6973572 >>6973556 TIM THE TOOLMAN TAYLOR I M T H E T O O L M A N T A Y L O R

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 14:57:30 2015 No.6973580 File: 44 KB, 409x393, trey.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6968851 >FOOD LIKE ME

Anonymous Wed Oct 14 15:00:06 2015 No.6973588

one time when I was 10 or 11 my friend's mom got us Jack in the Box on the way back to their house and I got a Jack's Spicy Chicken.

We got in the car and I was sitting in the backseat next to his baby brother when his baby brother spit all over my sandwich. Naturally I didn't want to eat it but when I told him I wasn't going to eat it because his shitstain brother spit all over it he told me to eat it.

I just hid it under some napkins but I was hungry as fuck for the rest of the day. Their house was fucking disgusting too fuck that guy

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 15:03:53 2015 No.6973596 >>6973542 What a mean bitch. You made it clear from the start you don't like tuna and she tried to guilt you into not just trying it but having seconds? You're not the asshole in that story, anon.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 15:09:06 2015 No.6973600 >>6970898 I figured you did this professionally.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 15:16:38 2015 No.6973622 >>6973539 I would guess she puked it all. Despite being dog vomit it smelled pretty good. Kinda ruins snickers for me, to be honest.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 15:19:06 2015 No.6973625 >>6973536 >What is an exaggeration?

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 15:21:45 2015 No.6973636 >>6973562 I appreciate your dad's exact frequency of autism. He sounds funny.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 15:48:55 2015 No.6973724 >>6968898 >tipping to cover your friends How far into the friendzone are you?

Anonymous Wed Oct 14 15:50:07 2015 No.6973727

>>6971528
Green curry sucks too. I decided to buck the pad thai trend and get green curry with chicken and bamboo shoots as my first thai. Looked nasty, color of puss. Smells bad. Tastes a little worse than it smells. Got to the bamboo shoots, they were also bad, no wonder damn pandas are dying off. Ended up just picking out the chicken and veggies and eating those because the grossness hadn't penetrated them.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 15:54:04 2015 No.6973741 >>6973539 Milk chocolate is low on chocolate, plus snickers isnt solid chocolate. Two pounds of baking chocolate would have killed dozens of chihuahuas though.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 16:10:56 2015 No.6973799 File: 163 KB, 824x700, b_2012030816595959207.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6973562 All he had to see was I want cheddar from a block of cheese not a processed cheddar slices.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 16:19:42 2015 No.6973830 >>6973493 In what way is introducing a friend to people in a social setting being hypocritical?

Anonymous Wed Oct 14 17:54:54 2015 No.6974084 [DELETED]

File: 1.63 MB, 659x609, 1444742354159.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>6973408
>What service rifle do you now use
after 50 years of trial and error, over a million deaths(half of which were probably caused by weapon malfunction) america finally forced a rifle through redesign after redesign by shooting billions of dollars at it.
the rifle design is so bad they have to include a forward assist for when the weapon does jam, not if it does merely when.
john garand did it in less than 10, checkmate americucks.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 21:28:21 2015 No.6974818 >>6970283 Look at this snobby little cunt. I bet you think your balls are bigger for drinking coffee black. Typical virgin who thinks if they follow tough-guy stereotypes women will think they're tough. Loser.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 21:35:37 2015 No.6974841 >>6970868 Look, another UShAter. What a unique and original opinion you have, one certainly not based on being a news-watching shill who could be influenced to jump off a bridge if the rest of the world was reporting that they should do so.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 21:53:04 2015 No.6974888 >>6971314 You sound like an immature man child. I fully expect your wife to cheat on/divorce you.

>>	Anonymous Wed Oct 14 22:05:15 2015 No.6974937 >>6973727 Jesus Christ you sound like a picky little crybaby of a human being.

>>	Anonymous Thu Oct 15 05:22:17 2015 No.6975956 I want to believe this is bait. I need to believe this is bait.

>>	Anonymous Thu Oct 15 05:26:31 2015 No.6975960 File: 40 KB, 250x250, plastic_man_tell.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>6973487 >earls >slightly fancy Is it though?

>>	Anonymous Thu Oct 15 05:29:19 2015 No.6975967 >>6973562 Jesus I chuckled like an asshole at the last line

>>	Anonymous Thu Oct 15 05:30:27 2015 No.6975968 >>6975956 meant to reply to >>6971314

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/ck/ - Food & Cooking