Worthless Kitchen Gadgets

[the_boar No.6594313]

ITT: kitchen "tools" that melt your brain.

Seriously I've never seen something so worthless. If you want a real laugh, watch this tard jar's review:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wYxFkS-DjyY

[Anonymous No.6594343]

>>6594313
>tard jar
Another reddifugee?

[Anonymous No.6594685]

it's like watching that autistic kid prepare a krabby patty

[Anonymous No.6594704]

>>6594313
Um, that actually looks like a premium product. It did everything she wanted it to do. Check your 'tism.

[Anonymous No.6595157]

>>6594704
>all that avocado in the skin
>slices look like shit
>single purpose piece of overpriced shit

No give me a decent $30-$50 chef's knife and a kitchen spoon any day of the week.

[Anonymous No.6595193]

>>6594313
Alex what is a knife?
1000 points for anon

[Anonymous No.6595194]

>>6595157
>being so shit at cooking you need a speshul kitchen appliance just to get some avocado slices

[Anonymous No.6595209]

>>6594313
If you don't like it, don't buy it. Meanwhile, shut the fuck up about people who do like it. Your ass is showing, and it needs wiping.

[Anonymous No.6596026]

>>6595209
Lol what are you talking about

[Anonymous No.6596034]

>>6596026
Shut your bitch ass mouth up. Your kind belongs in Europe where innovation goes to die.

[Anonymous No.6596038]

>>6595209
People don't like it. They get excited when they see it, buy it with a credit card that hasn't been paid off for over twenty years, then store it away forever after using it a couple of times. It's capitalism gone all wrong.

[Anonymous No.6596045]

I bought some apple/tomato cutter mesh-thing and I am still feeling buyer's remorse over it.
There's no dish in the world that justifies using some plastic shit that easily gets grimy and is hard to clean when you can just use a good steel knife.

[Anonymous No.6596056]

>>6596034
I thought you said you would wipe my ass :^)

[Anonymous No.6596129]

>>6594313
I can litterally do this faster and I am not that good at cutting these nor do I have a sharp knife.

[Anonymous No.6596144]

this doesn't make anything easier.

i can prep minced garlic 5x quicker with an ordinary knife.

[Anonymous No.6596150]

>>6596144
I'd disagree on that one.

[Anonymous No.6596162]

>>6596150

mince: get a sharp knife and chop in a rocking motion

paste: smash the garlic under the flat of your knife.

both preparations take seconds.

[Anonymous No.6596163]

>>6596144
You must not be strong enough to squeeze the thing.

[Anonymous No.6596172]

>>6596162
>garlic sticks to knife
>try to push it off with fingers
>sticks to fingers
>rub fingers to get garlic off
>falls onto the cutting board
>she calls me a useless piece of shit because I can't even chop garlic right
>she takes the kids and moves out
>start drinking and going into a depression
>lose my job, lose my apartment, live on the street
Fuck that shit. I'm just using the press

[Anonymous No.6596196]

>>6596144
no you can't

[Anonymous No.6596210]

>>6594313
>people actually fund, produce and market this type of shit

[Anonymous No.6596218]

>>6596162
Thanks. I understand how it's done.

I'm saying that you give me one (or ten) garlic cloves, and you take the same, and I press mine through a press, and you mince yours, I'll be faster, every time.

Unless you do a horrible mincing job.

[Anonymous No.6596222]

>>6596218
What if we added cleaning time to the equation. How do you clean your garlic press? Do you have a high pressure hose or something?

[Anonymous No.6596225]

>>6596196
toss garlic into air, make several lateral slices
the slices land on your knife, toss again and make perpendicular slices into shreds
finely chop shreds when they land on the board

all this should happen in no more than four seconds with zero wastage

[Anonymous No.6596227]

>>6596172
I know that feel bro
Happened to me once

Bought a garlic press the next day

Never again

[Anonymous No.6596231]

>>6596222
How do you clean the garlic glue off the edge of your knife? Steel wool and sandpaper?

[Anonymous No.6596233]

>>6596231
Maybe I'm just crazy but I don't have garlic stick to my knife too much. No more than onions. All I have to do is give it a good press off and it falls back onto the cutting board like it should.

[Anonymous No.6596237]

>>6596231
I just wipe it off with a wet cloth. There are lots of crevices in a press for bits of garlic to get stuck in.

[Anonymous No.6596238]

>>6596222

Now we're getting somewhere. And, if there were a bunch of cloves to do, I;d have to clean out my press once in a while.

If we each had 5 peeled cloves, and we had to clean our tools (a knife and cutting board for you, and a press for me), I think I would still easily beat you. That's saying you'd have to have a mince that roughly equates my press.

Truthfully, I;d think you;d be better off with a hard smash and some rough chopping, but let's go with your mincing.

tl;dr- I'd still win.

Anyone who says a good press (and I stress the good, they're certainly not all equal) is a worthless kitchen gadget goes down a notch in my book.

[Anonymous No.6596239]

>>6595157
>he can't do it with a $5 IKEA knife and a fork

[Anonymous No.6596241]

>>6594313
>"glides through fairly easily"
>squashes the shit out of it

[Anonymous No.6596245]

>>6596144
dank meme bro

[Anonymous No.6596255]

>>6596239
>not just smashing it open with your hands

[Anonymous No.6596342]

A rice cooker. I eat rice almost every day (not asian), and I didn't really notice any difference to rice I cooked on the stovetop. I don't really see how anyone can be that retarded to overcook rice. Unless you have 1 or 2 burners, it's just a useless gadget that takes up space.

[Anonymous No.6596396]

I defy anyone to chat shit about this based little godsend
I use it every single day and makes breakfast so much easier

[Anonymous No.6596572]

>>6596342

>man who never cooks anything complicated detected

[Anonymous No.6596578]

kek'd

[Anonymous No.6596599]

>>6594313
actually considering avocados are amongst the main source of kitchen accidents in the world this gadget could literally save your healthcare millions

[Anonymous No.6596607]

>>6596162
this doesn't work, the garlic you buy there is simply not soft enough and will not crush at all with a flat knife. either you dice it or crush it with a garlic press.
also
>fingers on a blade with no gloves
you could get a restaurant closed for that shit. in before "but I know what I'm doing!"

[Anonymous No.6596637]

>>6596607

Do you have any idea what the actual laws are

I can touch anything in the restaurant bare handed when I feel like it

[Anonymous No.6596644]

>>6596607
>this doesn't work

You're just inept. Mince garlic, add salt, squash like a motherfucker, repeat salting and squashing until it's paste. Has nothing to do with the consistency of the garlic.

>touching knife without gloves
>you could get a restaurant closed for that shit.

Where the fuck do you live?

[Anonymous No.6596810]

>>6596607
>>6596644

I think what he should have said is that this doesn't work speedy enough for you to continue on your tirade against a fabulous kitchen tool.

If you think you can mince/smash faster than I can press, you're crazy.

However, consistency of garlic does make a difference, as does size of clove. Some of those local massive hardneck ones are very different than the tiny softneck supermarket ones.

[Anonymous No.6596817]

>>6596144
you can't. but you can clean a knife in seconds, cleaning a fucking garlic press properly takes half an hour to get all the shitty little bits out.

[Anonymous No.6596849]

>>6596817
Unless you're using a press with a cleaning tool, in which case it takes five seconds and a rinse under water.

[Anonymous No.6596865]

Hold up, we have this garlic argument about once a week, but no one ever mentions secret option C: garlic PLATES.

[Anonymous No.6596874]

>>6596144
>>6596162
>>6596172
>>6596238
>not using a microplane

[Anonymous No.6596878]

>>6596396
this looks like a butter knife combined with a church key

[Anonymous No.6596883]

Basically every utensil that's used for quickly removing pits, skins or what have you from fruits or vegetables. The assumption that these things make is ridiculous, the assumption being that every piece of fruit or vegetable is the same.

[Anonymous No.6596917]

>>6596883
I actually had a cherry pitter once. It worked pretty well.

[Anonymous No.6596922]

>>6596865
I don't little bits of my fingertips in my garlic.

[Anonymous No.6596955]

>>6596917
they work okay i just don't have ten thousand hours to pit every sing goddamn cherry or olive or whatever with a monopurpose tool
>pits cherries
>AND olives
>dual purpose

[Anonymous No.6596986]

[Anonymous No.6596990]

>>6596986
Its lego size monument for boiled egg?

[Anonymous No.6596998]

>>6596986

That's not a kitchen gadget, it's a Lego dis-assembly tool.

[Anonymous No.6597006]

>>6596986
probably the most functional tool ive ever used

[Anonymous No.6597009]

>>6596607
>you could get a restaurant closed for that shit
It's clear you have no idea in any case.

[Anonymous No.6597058]

>>6596255
>Inventing fire

[Anonymous No.6597074]

>>6596986
literally the only people that think these are worthless don't know what they do

[Anonymous No.6597247]

>>6596922
It's not even sharp you donut.

[Anonymous No.6597251]

>>6594313
if it works, its not useless.

learn to use language and articulate your thoughts.

[Anonymous No.6597295]

>>6596986

...A doorstop?

[Grenache Blanc No.6598220]

>>6596342
>
It's hot as balls outside. I appreciate my rice cooker so much in the summer for preparing hot food without having to use a burner.

[Anonymous No.6598235]

>>6594704
So does a knife. And the knife slices better and doesn't waste 10% of the avocado

[Anonymous No.6598251]

>>6594704
>'tism
>mfw i see someone else say this

[Anonymous No.6598283]

>>6596917
yeah, but a wine bottle and a straw is super quick, too.

[Anonymous No.6598292]

>>6596172
Why did you let your cutting board take your kids?