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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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6544236 No.6544236 [Reply] [Original]

I used to be a lawyer. I guess now you can call me a sue chef.

>> No.6544247
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6544247

I used to be a Native American. I guess now you can call me a Sioux chef.

>> No.6544256

I grew up in Louisiana. I happen to be a roux chef.

>> No.6544259

I used to be just a woman. I guess now you can call me a Sue chef.

>> No.6544261

I specialize in adhesive cooking. I guess you can call me a glue chef.

>> No.6544264

I overthrew my ruler. I'm a coup chef.

>> No.6544265

I suffer from crippling depression. I guess you can call me a blue chef.

>> No.6544268

I make food from faeces. I guess you can call me a loo chef.

>> No.6544272

I post on /ck/. I guess you can call me a new chef.

>> No.6544273

I'm pretty inexperienced in the kitchen. I guess you could call me a new chef.

>> No.6544274

I listen to music while cooking. You can call me The Who chef.

>> No.6544276

It's about time I started cooking. I guess you could call me a due chef.

>> No.6544277

I'm from the slums of Shaolin. I guess you can call me a Wu chef.

>> No.6544279

All my sauces are runny as shit. I guess now you could call me a goo chef.

>> No.6544280

I don't know how to cook. You can call me my wife.

>> No.6544281

I specialize in bialy. I guess you can call me a jew chef

>> No.6544282

I have terrible allergies. I guess you could call me A'CHOOO! chef.

>> No.6544283

I always put on a bit of Hard Boiled while I cook. I guess you could call me a Woo chef.

>> No.6544284

I design sneakers for Nike. I guess you can call me a shoe chef.

>> No.6544287

My *sniffle* nose is *hrrnk* constipated as shit. I guess *snorrrt* you could call me a flu chef. *wheeze* *snort*

>> No.6544288

I specialize in extravagant color schemes with my food. I guess you could call me a hue chef.

>> No.6544289

i see a lot of unfunny women posting ITT

fucking narmies leaveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee ree

>> No.6544291

>>6544287
Kek

>> No.6544292

I make food that's orgasmically good. You could call me an ooh chef.

>> No.6544294
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6544294

I am a skeleton. You can call me a BOO chef.

>> No.6544297

Cooking is my foremost passion, and I'm currently employed in a high-end restaurant. I guess you could call me a true chef.

>> No.6544301

My employer is retarded and hired an actual cow to work in the kitchen and didn't think of the ramifications of doing such, so I guess you could call me a moo chef.

>> No.6544305

My food is so bad you'll regret eating it. I guess you could call me a rue chef.

>> No.6544306
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6544306

When you crave the meat of flightless birds, I guess you could call an emu chef.

>> No.6544309

>>6544280
Fucking lol.

>> No.6544311

I cook with garlic, I guess you could call me a meme chef.

>> No.6544319
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6544319

I have a little Paris kitchen, I guess you can call me a Khoo chef.

>> No.6544325

I cook like a dirty whore. I guess you could call me your momma chef

>> No.6544328

I live in prison and have to cook all my meals in a toilet. I guess you could call me a poo chef.

>> No.6544336
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6544336

I cook meat on droids. I guess you could call me an R2 chef.

>> No.6544346

I am the master of evil and can only be defeated by a magical sword wielded by a samurai who I transported into the future. I guess you could call me an Aku chef.

>> No.6544350
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6544350

http://thehardtimes.net/2015/05/25/punk-themed-food-truck-only-serves-lazy-puns/

>> No.6544387

I have hooves and a woolly coat. I guess you can call me the ewe chef.

>> No.6544399

OP-histhread-his life.jpg

>> No.6544404

I believe in bullshit Planet X conspiracy theories. I guess you can call me a Nibiru chef.

>> No.6544430

>39 posts
>16 posters
OP you are sad

>> No.6544436

I used to eat my poo, I guess you could call me a poo chef.

>> No.6544712

>>6544236

Don't wash my hands before cooking. I guess now you can call me the poo chef.

>> No.6544718

>>6544712
Been done three times already you retarded sack of fucking god damn useless piece of monkey shit

>> No.6544746

I'm a machinist in a fastener factory. I guess you could call me a screw chef.

>> No.6544751

>>6544236

I just started working in a restaurant that primarily serves African game. I guess you can call me a Gnu chef.

>> No.6544760

I used to be cheese. I guess now you can call me a blu chef.

>> No.6544767

I cook all my meals sideways. I guess you could call me askew chef.

>> No.6544769

My cooking makes people violently ill. I guess you could call me a spew chef.

>> No.6544774

>>6544236

I just got promoted top cook in a restaurant that caters to diners' whims. I guess you can call me a hanker chief chef.

>> No.6544789

I flip hamburgers at mcdonalds. I guess you couldn't call me a chef at all.

>> No.6544797

I eat on the pool table. I guess now you could call me a cue chef

>> No.6544799

I work at a restaurant that has a Star Wars theme and only serves Italian food to young male patrons. I guess I'm a Chef Boy R2D2.

>> No.6544813

>>6544789
/thread

>> No.6544834

I bluffed on my resume and have no experience so I guess I should be calling you "Chef"

>> No.6544835

I'm a linecook and Amelia Bedelia's younger brother. I guess you could call me a misconstrue chef.

>> No.6544894

I'm a recent convert to Islam. I guess you could call me Yusef.

>> No.6544975

I used to be the Soviet President. I guess you can now call me Gorbachev.

>> No.6544981

They sent me to eight different restaurants looking for a parsley curler, I guess you could call me a rube chef

>> No.6544993

I'm a pastry cook from Ethiopia specialising in coffee desserts. I guess now you can call me a yirga-chef.

>> No.6545000

They planned to kill me in the kitchen, my fucking sous stabbed me and the last words I uttered: "Et tu, Chef?"

>> No.6545006

I'm Heston Blumenthal. I guess you could call me a poo chef.

>> No.6545009

I like to plate things in long, hollow cylinders. I guess you can call me a tube chef.

>> No.6545011

>>6545009
I like to make food using lube. I guess you can call me a lube chef.

>> No.6545012
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6545012

I used to be a babysitter. I guess now you can call me a Shue chef.

>> No.6545020

>>6545011
Pretty sure that's not how this goes...

>> No.6545036

I do martial arts while prepping ingredients. I guess you can call me kung fu chef.

>> No.6545050

>>6545020
I will penetrate you

>> No.6545067

"Hi? I'm gonna be lating coming in today. Well, I'm calling from my mobile from the inside of a belly. Yeah. See, I went into the attic to get my whites but forgot to turn the light on. Yeah. Yes. Uhuh. Anyway, so I won't be coming in on time, sorry. I've been eaten by a grue, chef."

>> No.6545082

>>6545050
Finally. I mean, it's literally been ages..

I once cooked for John Belushi and Dan Akroyd. I guess you can call me a blues chef.

>> No.6545303

no one in this thread has a penis

>> No.6545309
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6545309

>>6545012
top jej

>> No.6545320

This thread reads like the reddit comments section

>> No.6545432

>>6544294
2spoopy

>> No.6545804

>>6544236
Jeff?

>> No.6545872

Why are they all looking at him?

>> No.6545960

>>6544259
I am now a woman. You can call ME sue Chef.

>> No.6548050

>>6545000
Trips and keks, all in one.

>> No.6548554
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6548554

>32 posters

>> No.6548581

I am Lil Wayne and I am monitoring this thread for ideas

>> No.6548690

I used to be a District Attorney and I guess you can call me a split plea soup chef.

>> No.6549213

>>6544268
I like to correct people. You should have went with poo chef.

>> No.6549228

>>6544236
Fuck why don't I remember grils being that cute when I was in middle school...

Am I gay?

>> No.6549243

>>6549228
No, just a pedophile.

>> No.6549257

>>6549243
good one m8 got me

>> No.6549284

I use my mediocre cooking skills to pork fat girls, you can call me "man the harpoon chef".

>> No.6549290

I am a chef with turrets syndrome, I guess you can call FUCK YOU me a chef.

>> No.6549293

Please turn off AdBlock when using 4chan, Moot calls me his ad revenue chef. Also we have homosexual sex.

>> No.6549298

I can't melt steel beams, you can call me jet fuel chef.

>> No.6549305

I have sex with my uncle, call me a taboo chef.

>> No.6549313

>>6544236
That mother fucker, standing in the middle of a crowd, was me once. I was at Ozzfest back in like 2004 or some shit and was smack dab in the middle of a Lamb of God wall of death. Ended up with a broken nose that night. Totally worth it though.

>> No.6549314

I'm an the whitest skinned person you'll ever meet, you can call me a pasty chef.

>> No.6549322

I used to cook curry and shit. I guess now you can call me Apu poo chef

>> No.6549327

Im actually a barber, but you can call me a hair doo chef.

>> No.6549328

when I cook at home alone you can call me a nude chef.

>> No.6549386

>>6549328
Get outta here Jamie Oliver

>> No.6549401

>>6549228

Not sure but I bet your boyfriend is.

>> No.6549424
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6549424

>>6544236

It was only after they told me that I was despicable, I became a Gru chef.

>> No.6549668

I post middle-school-tier "jokes" on a cooking board instead of actually contributing something interesting. I guess now you could call me fucking cancer.

>> No.6549673
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6549673

>>6549668
Please stop shitposting.

>> No.6549677

>>6549673
Oh yeah, thats definitely the shitpost, not the entire rest of this thread.

>> No.6549732

God tier thread. This is why I come to /ck/.

>> No.6549750

Stir fry cooks come from all woks of life.

>> No.6549815
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6549815

I'm a big guy. I guess you could call me a For You chef.

>> No.6549847

>>6549677
Yes, nice to see you've learned so quickly for being as dumb as you are

>> No.6550002

I eat acid and molly and make grilled cheese sandwiches at festivals, you can call me a Bonnaroo chef