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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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File: 34 KB, 458x458, Coffee-Enema.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6524987 No.6524987[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

I've heard a fair bit about coffee enemas over the last few weeks for some reason. Thought I'd give it a try. Anyone here tried it? How was it? Care to relate tips?

>> No.6524999

>>6524987
Check out it out on youtube. There's a couple that does it. Pretty weird if you ask me. In fact, I would even go so far as to say what the fuck is wrong with you? Or nice troll attempt, anyway.

>> No.6525007

What the fuck is the point of these? Does it give you energy through your ass?

>>6524999
Does that couple walk around squirting coffee in their pants all day when they move?

>> No.6525008

>>6524999
Nah seriously. It's supposed to be good for you. I'm worried about the effects of taking on 10 cups of coffee at one go though. ...

>> No.6525022

>>6525007

I think it's that the walls of your bowels will absorb the caffeine and shit much more quickly, effectively giving you a super high.

There was an episode of 1000 Ways To Die that detailed how a guy did with with wine and died from alcohol poisoning because the walls of his bowels absorbed the alcohol before his liver could filter it down.

>> No.6525023

>>6525007
It's supposed to help clean out your intestines and give you a lift at the same time.

>> No.6525027

How long till coffee enemas become mainstream?

>> No.6525030

>>6524987
Coffee already makes me shit when I ingest it normally, why would I put it in my ass?

>> No.6525039

>>6525022
>giving you a super high.

no

it's still just caffeine and the effects will not be different than if you just took a shit load of caffeine. if you want to do that spend a few bucks and buy some caffeine capsules or tabs which will be a thousand times easier than plugging coffee

>> No.6525043

>>6525030
This is the question I was hoping to get answers to from people who have tried it.

It's supposed to be quite a good experience, but I'd like to hear from someone who isn't trying to sell me something.

>> No.6525054

>>6525043
Who exactly has been trying you sell you shoving coffee up your ass?

>> No.6525072

>>6525054
A Facebook friend suggested the kit at the healthfood store.

>> No.6525076

>>6525072
You're friends with someone who goes around telling others what to shove up their ass?

>> No.6525080

>>6525076
If all you are going to do is be unhelpful, go post in the Joey thread.

>> No.6525085

Just kill yourself and rid the world of your stupidity.

>> No.6525098

>>6525085
You first. Show me how it's done. You are the bitter asshole. You are the pouting sulker. You are the one with absolutely nothing to contribute here, probably nowhere else either.

So go ahead. Meanwhile, I'll wait and see if anyone cares to answer my question. And if nobody does, that's fine too.

>> No.6525102

i love enemas

>> No.6525105
File: 20 KB, 320x320, image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6525105

What kind of coffee do you even use for that? A rich dark blend? Instant? Espresso?

Would you put a pound of Gorilla coffee up your ass?

>> No.6525106

>>6525105
I believe they make special coffee just for this sort of thing. I doubt you could use Starbucks. Might taste better though.

>> No.6525107

>>6525098
>bitter asshole
Actually thats going to be OP

>> No.6525109

>>6525098
>You are the bitter asshole

Wait, I'm confused, I thought you were the one who puts coffee up his butt.

>> No.6525171

>>6525109
You are indeed confused.

>> No.6525190

>>6525039

It's the same amount, yes, but it's hitting your blood stream more quickly, giving you a quicker, higher concentrated dose of it.

>> No.6525309

Drinking too much coffee makes me lightheaded and jittery. I can only imagine that hosing a bunch of it into my colon might make me feel awful and pass out.

>> No.6525317

>>6525105
iced coffee or go home

>> No.6525645

If coffee enemas are dangerous, what makes the best enema? I really want to try one.

>> No.6525684

It would scald your anus terribly dont do it.

>> No.6525703

RIP Brazilian patient

>> No.6525792 [DELETED] 

>>6524987
You should talk to Robin Quivers from the Howard Stern show.
facebook com/ robinquivers

She's a professional at coffee enemas.

>> No.6525905

SEAN GET MY ENEMA BUCKET!

>> No.6525926

>>6525106
>taste

Do you drink it afterwards?

>> No.6525975

>Welcome to Starbucks, try our new Boofuccino

>> No.6525978

it seems weird op but its awesome. dont doubt it

>> No.6526081
File: 27 KB, 412x352, 1361506997674.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6526081

>>6525107

>> No.6526323

Aeropress coffee into your asshole like a real coffee expert.

>> No.6526338

lols, i saw that porno too. seen the egg one?

>> No.6526414
File: 3 KB, 126x117, 1289551056318.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6526414

>>6525107

>> No.6526417

>>6524987
That's a buttload of coffee

>> No.6526418

Anyone here tried butt shots? I want to get drunk fast.

>> No.6526613

>>6524987
Hot tip, let it cool down first (heh, hot tip).

>> No.6526621

>what kinda enema you want fam?

>just folgers my shit up

>> No.6526664

>>6524987
Is that photo before or after the enema?

>> No.6526668

>>6525043
If I told you my dick in your ass was a good experience, would you still keep your curiosity piqued?

>> No.6526687

OP i have finals next week so imma shove some instant coffee up my ass tomorrow, hope the thread will be alive. Honestly, I don't see how any kind of enema would be beneficial for health (and I'm a medical student), unless you're constipated or somethng. I only use it to clean before anal. What I do want to try is to see how fast will coffeine be absorbed.

>> No.6526690

>>6526687
Oh and, I'm pretty sure you're supposed to dilute the coffee, because as concentrated as we drink it, it's very acidic.

>> No.6526692

>>6526687
>a faggot medical student who thinks it's prudent to inject black acid water into his ass

i have so many questions

>> No.6526701

>>6526692
>black acid water
Imma dilute it ok? And nothing unusual, about 40% of all guys here(med school) are gay. I'm that type of faggot who does stupid shit like eating nutmeg and belladonna berries, why not try this?

>> No.6526713

I just searched coffee enema on eBay and one of the first things to come up was Aero Press.

Could work I guess, just pump it straight in there.

>> No.6526716 [DELETED] 
File: 19 KB, 300x198, kopi-luwak-coffee-taiwan-300x198.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6526716

It would be pretty ironic to use civit coffee beans for a coffee enema.

>> No.6526721

>>6526716
Why?

>> No.6526726 [DELETED] 

>>6526721
Because the civits eat the plants and the beans but can't digest the beans so they shit them out, then those beans are harvested and sold as super high priced fancy coffee beans. So the irony is that it's already come from the shitter of a civit and is going back into a shitter for the coffee enema.

>> No.6526728

>>6526726
I didnt know coffee came from shit. I thought they harvested dry beans than peeled the outsidd layer or something.

>> No.6526735 [DELETED] 

>>6526728
Just that variety, not all coffee is done that way. Apparently the beans "mature" might be the term the marketing people would use and take on another flavor when passing through the digestive system of the civit. It's very expensive. I don't like coffee personally so have never tried that but I've read about it in news stories.

>> No.6526737

>>6526728
They just do it for an extremely expensive sort of coffee. You're correct about the procedure for most other types.

>> No.6528060

OP has clearly never done a regular enema because he wouldnt even be joking around. underage colonoscopy virgin detected.

>> No.6528100

>>6525109

He's gonna have a bitter asshole after that amount of darkroast goes up there.

>> No.6528336

>>6526417

underrated post