/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.6377761]

>come home from work
>roommate is using my $200 knife on a glass cutting board
>I didn't even know we had a glass cutting board

>mfw it couldn't even cut through a tomato skin afterward

Roommate stories?

[Anonymous No.6377796]

>OH MY GOD EVERYBODY IS SO STUPID BUT ME I'M SO INTELLIGENT AND CULTURED AND REFINED AND [...]

There, I saved you the rest of the thread.

[Anonymous No.6377806]

>>6377796

/thread

[Anonymous No.6377808]

>roommate goes shopping
>give him enough money to buy my shit
>he comes back
>help him unload all the shit
>gather my shit and put it away
>everything he bought was junk food and shit like pie/cake/icecream/soda
>whatever.jpg
>eats through 3/4ths of his shit in 2 days
>pesters me for the next week asking for food or for me to make him food
>sometimes my food disappears

I left like a year ago. It was awful.

[Anonymous No.6377823]

>>6377761
>owning a $200 knife
>not having a set of stones and knowing how to get it back to hair shaving sharpness in 10min

shiggy

[Anonymous No.6377835]

>>6377796
I remember when fun was still allowed on /ck/.

[Anonymous No.6377839]

Well uh, he crushed a block of tofu with his hands and made a mess because cutting it with the knife that was already on the board was too hard.

I don't really know how you arrive at that conclusion. This happened like 30 minutes ago, too.

[Anonymous No.6377857]

I finally have some to share.

>roommate runs out of his room to speak with me every time he hears me come home or even when I make a small trip to the kitchen
>start cooking something (read: 2 or 3 times a day)
>"WHATCHA COOKING MAN?"
>proceeds to talk at me verbosely as I'm trying to concentrate on my cooking

also

>ask him kindly to start doing his share of the dishes
>seems to ONLY remember when I start cooking and gets in my way as he loads/unloads it

the worst

>throws away aluminum cans, milk jugs, and cardboard/paper boxes

[Anonymous No.6377866]

>>6377857
>being a recycle fag pushing your stupid recycling agenda onto people
>complains about a bothersome roommate

You almost had me there anon.

[Anonymous No.6377873]

>>6377857

Now onto autismgirl

>room is right above the kitchen
>hear loud slapping sounds and sex talk in the tone of a causal conversation
>"it hurts it hurts no don't do that"
>here that line at least three times a week

also
>never EVER locks the front door, asked her nicely over 10 times to remember to lock it
>never does dishes
>buys massive wine goblets that take up valuable cabinet space, though she only buys a bottle of wine once every three months
>sees me loading dishwasher
>throws dirty fork right into the sink


there was a cat piss saga that I may go into at a later time. I'm going to find a way to get back at her before I'm out of here.

[Anonymous No.6377876]

>>6377866

The recycling bin is right next to the trash can. There's no fucking excuse. It just takes putting it in one container vs. the other.

[Anonymous No.6377882]

>>6377857
>roommate tries to be friendly
>"Ugh"

Come on bro, that's a bit dumb.

[Anonymous No.6377883]

>>6377866
careful with that edge, son

[Anonymous No.6377889]

>Roommates are chink immigrants, husband and wife
>Wife is in culinary school
>Makes massive multi-course meals for her husband every night
>Brings home things like a dozen loaves of bread or three entire cakes from her classes, lets everyone in the house take some

I love you chinky

[Anonymous No.6377893]

>>6377873
>having girls as a roommate and not even getting sex out of it
>not even once.jpg

[Anonymous No.6377898]

>>6377857
is his name ryan?

[Anonymous No.6377903]

>>6377889
I don't understand. I might be lost here but I thought Roommate always sort of meant "Lives in the same house as you and pays half your rent" more like housemate.

What do you consider a roommate? It sounds like you just live in a building with a bunch of people like a dorm or some communal apartment complex. To me those are neighbors or dormfags.

[Anonymous No.6377904]

>>6377823
>paying $200 for a knife that can be sharpened in 10 min
That's some shitty steel for $200

[Anonymous No.6377911]

>>6377761
>roommate moves out when girlfriend and I aren't there
>takes my pepper grinder
>doesn't eat pepper

That one just bothered the hell out of me.

[Anonymous No.6377915]

>first year of University
>living in a share house with three other people
>dishes are never done
>kitchen is always a mess
>whole place is usually a mess

I don't understand why people can't just clean up after themselves. Is it really that difficult to wash and dry your own dishes after you use them? Fuck me.

[Anonymous No.6377916]

>>6377903

I live in a house with 4 other people in a shitty college town.

[Anonymous No.6377918]

>>6377873
that cat piss smell is not cat piss. ryan still wets the bed.

shit you not

[Anonymous No.6377920]

>>6377916
Oh I see.

[Anonymous No.6377921]

>>6377882

as someone who works full time, it's extremely annoying to have your roommate always be home and at the same time never respect your space

[Anonymous No.6377929]

>roommate slowly unravels his mental illness as the semester goes by
>just gets fucked up on klonopin and alcohol everyday for like six months
>make awful boxed/canned food and never washes dishes
>always come home to dishes that are moldy
>cant even cook because the kitchen is crowded with moldy shit and the thought of having to clean up the kitchen sickens me
he was my bestfriend at some point and now he's just a pill popping monster
sad times

[Anonymous No.6377932]

>>6377929
>letting dirty dishes sit there for more than enough days to collect mold

You are also part of the problem. I mean sure its not your mess to clean up, but mold just doesn't sprout in 1 day.

[Anonymous No.6377933]

>>6377915
I've come to understand that my own standards of cleanliness are apparently just too high and people seem all too happy to live in amongst messes.

[Anonymous No.6377936]

>Roommate makes mashed potatoes one day
>Fills the pot with water afterwards, to 'let it soak'
>It 'soaks' for fully two weeks and begins to smell
>Decide fuck this, I'm cleaning it even if no one else is
>nearly vomit from the smell of rotting garlic, potatoes and bacon in old gross water

He still never does dishes.

[Anonymous No.6377939]

>>6377932
there was a point where i would clean up his dirty dishes, then a new pile would appear
that happened everyday and i work part time, on top of full time schoolwork

[Anonymous No.6377947]

>>6377936
But why do you let it go for two weeks before making that decision?

[Anonymous No.6377949]

I can't stop my roommate from using my knives to cut whatever slop he eats on porcelain plates.

>sorry bro, but those are the only sharp knives in da house

NO SHIT

I think I'm just going to buy a Victorinox Forschner and keep it around and store my knives in my room until I get a lease with a responsible adult who doesn't smoke $100 worth of weed every week.

[Anonymous No.6377955]

>>6377947
I went out of town a day or so after he made it, came back and it was still just sitting there smelling up the place

[Anonymous No.6377961]

>>6377949
Also he uses the green side of scotch pads on nonstick cookware.

They're his so I don't care as much, but still, he's getting teflon in my food.

[Anonymous No.6377992]

>>6377761
I once had a roommate who would eat all my Chines Take-Out leftovers. So I started ejaculating in it and just let him have it. I laughed about that for years.

[Anonymous No.6378004]

>>6377992
My nigga

[Anonymous No.6378013]

>>6377992
The leftovers are the best part anon. Also nice of you to give him an extra helping of protein and zinc.

[Anonymous No.6378041]

>roommate buys 10 dollar eye round steak when for the same price/lb he could have had ribeye which was on sale
>throws it on a non stick pan with zero seasoning
>puts cold pan on stove
>turns stove on
>naturally, the meat boils and doesn't sear at all
>cooks it till well done, grey as fuck
>eats it with hot sauce

[Anonymous No.6378078]

>roommates refuse to pitch in for potatoes
> have no problems trying to get in on my fishing chips

[Anonymous No.6378092]

>>6377873
Here's how you get back at her.

>Find skeevy person you don't like much
>Tell them she always leaves the front door unlocked and when you will both be out of the house
>Get them to break in and steal all her stuff
>Make sure your important stuff is safely locked away
>Put hidden camera in house though
>Catch skeevy person robbing you on camera
>You have taught housemate the importance of locking the door
>You have blackmail goods on skeevy asshole who robbed your house.

[Anonymous No.6378095]

>>6377929
klonopin is scary, shit made me feel drunk off just .5 mg

[Anonymous No.6378102]

Not roommate but

>Mum helping set up a greenhouse in the garden
>I come outside with some supplies
>Find mum cutting open bag of concrete with a expensive chef's knife
>She sticks it blade down in the soil
>"Mum! You can't use that knife for that!"
>"Why not Anon? It's really sharp!"

[Anonymous No.6378118]

>>6377866
strangely I agree with these dubs, they make sense recycling does nothing, eat a dick recycle-fags,

[Anonymous No.6378120]

>>6377761
Why don't you spend some of your knife budget on getting your own place?

[Anonymous No.6378137]

>>6377761
>glass cutting board

Who the fuck would think up such a useless invention?

[Anonymous No.6378141]

>>6377761

So a glass cutting board completely dulled your $200 knife after one use...you should either get a better knife or a better BS roommate story.

[Anonymous No.6378149]

>>6377893
have you never lived with women as roomates? it doesn't work like that.

it's kind of awesome because women make the best "wingmen". You don't fuck your roommates, that's stupid. You use your roommates to lure equally or more attractive women.

it works every time.

[Anonymous No.6378157]

if you're not lying then you're a fucking retard for keeping your good knives in the fucking drawer with everything else for retards to ruin

>b-but they shouldn't do that!

no shit, but they will

same reason I gave up all hope of my nonstick shit not being ruined when I had roommate

>using nonstick

it's nice for omelets

[Anonymous No.6378158]

>>6377761
Well duh, you need a serrated knife for tomato.

[Anonymous No.6378163]

roommate moves in
bought a dozen stupid kitchen gizmos
needed them all out and plugged in all the time
bitched about how there's no counter space

[Anonymous No.6378178]

>>6377904
git gud m8

[Anonymous No.6378190]

>roommate is a better cook than i am
>but has horrible fucking cooking habits
>waits at least a full day before he gets his dishes out of the tiny fucking sink in the kitchen
>doesnt clean surfaces after he gets food residue on them
>not even the stovetop
>the stovetop that proceeds to cook the food residue into itself
>uses more than half the fridge used by four people by himself
>leaves sauces and spices open and out on the kitchen table for days
he's a good guy, but i can't believe he doesnt know what he's doing being as good at cooking as he is
and it always stings a little when he says im a better cook than he is

[Anonymous No.6378192]

>>6377904
I use pic related to sharpen my ZDP-189 Spydercos and CPM-s30V Benchmades in about 1 minute :\

It's fun to show people how sharp whatever pocket knife I'm carrying is by plucking a hair from my head, holding it by the tip and rubbing my knife against it and carving it to look like a palm tree.

[Anonymous No.6378202]

>>6378192
I've only ever used stones to sharpen, what's the learning curve like on these?

[Anonymous No.6378204]

>share grocery bill
>never had time to make food for myself
>buy my own snacks and pizzas
>eat a single home cooked meal all month
>$400 grocery bill, have to pay $80
How do I correct this

[Anonymous No.6378210]

>>6377835
/ck/ is hands-down the funniest board on here. Well, /sp/ is autismal af, but this board speaks to me with better humor.

My roommates gave me the flu this week. I threw out all our ice and got weird looks, but the guy just had coughed all over his hands and proceeded to grab three sloppy handfuls of ice from the bin.

Like how do these people get this far in life being so disgusting?

[Anonymous No.6378211]

>>6378149
But they are usually useless pieces of shit like the post I was referring to.

Maybe I should rephrase it.

>having a useless bitch as a roommate and not even getting sex out of it
>not even once.jpg

[Anonymous No.6378221]

>>6378190
how much of a better cook is he than you?
like on a 1-10 scale

[Anonymous No.6378226]

>>6378202
I use stones too. I get the same hair-whittling results with my assortment of stones and my leather strop loaded with chrome oxide paste.

I think it's easier to use stones without damaging your knife. On the Work Sharp it's easy to make one wrong move and the machine will happily gouge out the tip of the knife or create an unintended recurve with the courser belts, which should only be used for severely damaged edges with deep chips or reprofiling.

Even the finer belts can round off a tip. It pays to take it slow and pay attention to where the belt is making contact with the edge until you gain confidence and use the machine briskly. Since I don't abuse my knives and if they don't have a microbevel I make one, I find that the extra fine and the 8000 grit belts are sufficient to bring a dull blade back to screaming sharp.

[Anonymous No.6378234]

>>6378221
if i was a 5, he'd probably be like an 8
i don't know how it is to people who don't cook, but anyone who does would be able to immediately tell that he's better than me

[Anonymous No.6378246]

>>6378092

my other roommate and I already simulated a blackout while she was in the shower. it was the only way we could get her to tell if she did what she promised to and got the power set-up in her name. (she didn't and it was supposed to be cut off two days prior)

she seem unphased

[Anonymous No.6378251]

>>6378204
>share grocery bill

why

why do people do this?

>don't have time to cook for myself

You don't have 10 minutes to make breakfast 30 minutes to cook dinner, and 15 to prepare your lunch for the next day? you must be an important man

[Anonymous No.6378252]

>>6378204
By not sharing the grocery bills. I learned that lesson in university.

[Anonymous No.6378271]

>>6377939

sounds like you are lazy or cannot into time management.

[Anonymous No.6378276]

>move in with 2 other girls
>korean and hamplanet
>went away for 10 days
>come back to filthy kitchen
>korean left oil splattered all over the stove
>does this every time she cooks
>rotting zucchini in the fridge
>hamplanet got mad when i threw it away
>wanted me to pay her back for it
>unwashed dishes
>someone used my new chopping board without asking
>both denied using it when it was dirty in the sink
>crumbs and food scraps over the floor


moved out 3 months before my lease finished, i was the only one who cleaned. how can people live like that?

[Anonymous No.6378278]

>>6378271
Well he shouldn't have to be cleaning up his shitty roommates mess while he just sits in his room drinking, popping pills, and being a general waste of air degenerate.

[Anonymous No.6378288]

>chilling in the living room with friend
>roommate comes downstairs and goes in kitchen
>goes back upstairs a minute later, saying he's going to bed
>friend goes into kitchen to make a cup of tea
>"anon, your kitchen smells of gas."
>roommate had turned on the gas oven, without lighting it, and gone to bed

[Anonymous No.6378309]

Here's one when I lived with 4 other dudes in one apartment
>live there with one of my best friends
>we go to Hong Kong for 3 weeks
>last day before trip, had a half of pineapple left
>told the other roommates that they can have the rest of it and agreed they will eat it the same day
>come back after 3 weeks
>pineapple still there, all caked in mold with maggots coming out of it
>balls of hair everywhere
>kitchen is massacred, yellow/green like mold all over the stove
>even fucking spotted roaches in the sink amongst the dishes
>on balcony, beer cans everywhere and amongst it was a pile of dead flies the size of cow dung
>shower was surprisingly clean
>one roommate started to eat outside the apartment and only came back to sleep
>another roommate simply lived with his gf until we came back
>both of them asked us to clean it up
>friend and me took all of our stuff and left the apartment in 3 days
>later on, they were removed by the landlords because people complained about the smell

[Anonymous No.6378324]

>>6378078
dude potatoes are like $2.00/10 pounds lmao

[Anonymous No.6378337]

>>6378276
>>6378276

Hello. Hi. Hey. You must be a young classy lady. Tis fun to see. If you're in MA, put out an email where I can reach you - if anything, I'll be the one in the kitchen : )

[Anonymous No.6378340]

>>6378288
mfw this happens and not sure if i can turn it off fast enough without getting the spark

[Anonymous No.6378373]

I always enjoy reading these threads but have trouble sharing anything, even though my roommates are as gross and messy as you can probably get. I tried forcing them to get their shit together but it really doesn't work, old dog new tricks etc. Ive found the easiest solution is just to chill and lower your expectations + keep as much stuff as you possibly can in your own room so it wont be messed around with

[Anonymous No.6378392]

>start erasmus at spain
>get an ecuadorian friend
>I am from Turkey so he says he is expecting some good food from me
>he doesnt eat meat or spices
>he doesnt even know how to cook pasta
>everytime he cooks something, he messes up
>one time when he was trying to replicate my grilled cheese sandwich, I saw him putting cheese on hot pan by itself
>when I give him advice on how to cook, he goes apeshit as in "dude its my cooking style, do I ever butt into your cooking?"
>he washes dishes once a week after he cant find a clean fork to eat whatever he has(which is mostly a terrible pasta out of water, cooled with sink water and put some bad cheese on it)
>he constantly eats my stuff

[Anonymous No.6378394]

>>6378392
>doesn't eat meat or spices
>constantly eats my stuff

So, you don't eat meat or spices either?

[Anonymous No.6378399]

>>6378394
eats my stuff like pasta, rice, cans of tuna, eggs, chicken from freezer
well those 5 are only things he was capable of preparing

>I make eggs on the pan, put a bit of black pepper and red pepper powder in it
>he uses pan after me to cook his own eggs
>"dude did you put spices on your eggs before* damn I can taste it"

[Anonymous No.6378408]

>>6378192
I was replying specifically to a claim about stones.

Have fun with your worksharp. Too rich for my blood. I havae a 5 piece lansky that does that trick even if it takes a while to grind a chip out of a strong blade.

[Anonymous No.6378411]

>>6378271
>someone works full time
>part time job on top of it
>druggie roommate leaves moldy dishes everywhere
>retarded basement dwelling neckbeard calls him lazy.

Okay then.

[Anonymous No.6378414]

>>6378204
Stop sharing groceries and stop buying your roommate food.

Who's paying the $80?

[Anonymous No.6378424]

>>6378324

>Dude water is like $0.02/gallon lmao
>Dude gas is like $0.20/m3 lmao
>Dude pasta is like $0.40/pound lmao
>Dude tomatoes are like $0.60/pound lmao
>Dude rice is like $0.30/pound lmao

You must make a great housemate.

[Anonymous No.6378430]

>>6378118
This, recycling is getting cucked by the Earth.

[Anonymous No.6378433]

I see most of these stories ending in moving out. How about confronting your roommate?

>low-life roomy eats out every other day
>can't manage his money for shit
>all money goes to weed and frozen meals
>used to leave shit for weeks piling up
>tell that fucker to at least put his shit in the dishwasher
>finally cleans up his act

>"upstanding" college-going roomy is ten times worse
>always making food from scratch, leaving all of his used spices and pans out for days
>all of our pots are rusted because he can't hand wash anything
>all of the non-sticks end up in the dishwasher, scratched to fuck
>end up buying my own set and telling him he can't use shit he can't maintain
>hint at and eventually confront him about his pile of dishes
>suddenly there's no dishes there
>he's fucking put every pot, crock pot, electric skillet above our cabinets dirty as fuck
>now keeps dishes dirty in his room
>smells of dog and rotting food seep out of his doorway any time he opens it

Gotta confront him about it warming up for summertime. If we get bugs, he's fucking out of here.

[Anonymous No.6378448]

>>6378102
Women. Just women. I used to sharpen my mother's knives for her, and every single fucking time she would use it to cut some cake on a glass platter right afterward and immediately ruin the edge.

[Anonymous No.6378493]

>>6377904
if you suck at using stones
I can get my whole set of 5 knives back to super sharp in about 20 minutes

getting a semi ruined knife back might take me about ten minutes if I do a proper job

up your game

[Anonymous No.6378498]

>>6378430
does not understand the concept of cuckolding.

[Anonymous No.6378534]

All of you guys are like gossiping little girls. I bet half of the stuff is over exaggerated or your own fault.

[Anonymous No.6378538]

>>6378534
I bet you have a butt plug

[Anonymous No.6378540]

>looking for a place, live with cousin in the interim
>he's a gaymer 24/7
>bad personal hygiene, sits in his gaming room in the dark all the time
>eats nothing but mcdonalds and 2 minute noodles
>never cleans up after himself, dishes pile up in the sink with soggy cold noodle leftovers for days
>roaches everywhere
>a rat was eating on the kitchen counter once
>rat shit everywhere

that was disgusting. But then I moved into a place with 3 girls and they would get mad at me if I left dishes on the bench overnight. One freaked out because she saw a cockroach once. I felt bad because they cleaned constantly and sometimes shared their food and were generally nice to live with.

[Anonymous No.6378543]

>>6378538
It's a pitty that I don't have one. Can you give me yours?

[Anonymous No.6378569]

here we go.

>moved into a house not long ago
>friendly stoner, and two lesbians also live here
>lesbian couple are cunts
>fat one begins leaving passive aggressive notes not long after i move in
>"do the dishes on point of use!11"
>she leaves her shit laying around all the time
>one day after a shitty day at work i come home to a filthy kitchen, dishes everywhere, food scraps, disgusting stove top
>flip my fucking shit at her, she mumbles, looks on the verge of delicious tears
>she now cleans up after herself, we don't talk anymore

also

>her girlfriend, the thin one that wishes she was a man
>can't cook to save her fucking life
>no household skills
>"how do i boil potatoes"
>"how do you mop the floor"
these girls are 19, 20
>thin one attempts to make some sort of curry in my pot
>burns the sides, still hasn't cleaned them
>had to buy steel wool to clean them myself
i want to tell them to stop using my pots and pans. thank christ i don't have a kinfe set.
>fat one complains how the non-stick pan is hard to cook with
it's perfect for making crepes. shit, it's perfect for cooking if you're not a fucking retard.

[Anonymous No.6378570]

>>6378078
> fishing chips

[Anonymous No.6378584]

>Move in with friend/colleague 6 months ago
>usually all is well
>but he's so forgetful and messy sometimes
>take turns loading/unloading dishes
>I take care of the countertop, he of the floor
>he makes food for his parents last Sunday
>Monday I come home from work
>we chat a bit, he leaves
>go to make food, find pic related
He didn't clean -anything- after making the food for his parents, left it overnight, tried to make chocolate milk and let it boil over, and also left that to stink the whole day, the sink where he dumped some milk was a mess too, didn't even run water through it.
And there was a cup with ashes and cigarette buds in it on the stove. Dumped the contents on his desk, chewed him out, and told him if he ever did something like that again I'd clean it with whatever and dump all garbage in his bed.
I'm pretty sure he got the message.
Age difference probably has something to do with it (30-22), but still, goddamn.

[Anonymous No.6378594]

>>6377936
>>6377955
i had a roommate make ramen the day before i left to visit family in florida for a week.
he makes ridiculous ramen, think of anything you can put in ramen and that's what he put in.

i came home to the same ramen pot molded over on the stove.
i asked him every day to clean it, that it's unfuckingacceptable and i will not tolerate it.

two days later i just upturned it onto his bed.
he didn't even get pissed off he knew he had it coming.

he knocked up some slut and moved out without notice two months later


fuckyou john you were so cool before i saved your ass and let you move in. i'll never forget you sobbing to me on the phone because you had no place to go.
thx for reading my blog 4chin

pic unrelated, abe vigoda in a wombat suit makes me laugh

[Anonymous No.6378607]

>>6377876
>Move from America to Denmark
>Suddenly have six bins labeled for different types of waste in the trash room of my apartment
>Flatmate bitches at me when I throw EVERYTHING into the nearest recycle can

Ain't nobody got time for that.

[Anonymous No.6378649]

>>6378607
we take seperating the trash quite seriously

except in italy, where they seperate the trash and then dump the different bins all together in the same truck
but then again, they haven't the easiest relationship to trash

[Anonymous No.6378668]

>>6378607
This is why I love Americans. They don't give a shit, they just live life.

[Anonymous No.6378679]

I just don't understand.
What is so special about this knife that it costs $200? In what way does it cut better than a knife from a $10 set of knives?
How does a $200 knife get that fucked up from using it on a glass cutting board?
Why would you leave a $200 knife out where your idiot roommate can use it?

[Anonymous No.6378682]

>>6378679
Stop being logical!

[Anonymous No.6378694]

>catch my roommate feeding *my* cat raw chicken
>tell him to fucking stop that and that the damn chicken needs to be cooked before anyone eats it for one, and two he shouldn't be feeding my cat
>"dude its okay this is natural for animals and you don't have to worry about salmonella that's a very rare thing anyway"
>it almost comes to blows
>a day later, my cat gets sick, take her to vet, vet confirms food poisoning
>roomate "you probably left the chicken out for a while before you put it in the refrigerator, meat that is fresh is perfectly fine"
>meanwhile, roommates also buys hamburger meat and eats it raw with just a fork and some salt to go with it

[Anonymous No.6378724]

>>6378679
Most cheap knives don't stayreally sharp for long.
200$ is a lot, but for some people it's worth it because of brand, looks, quality...
Cutting on glass dulls a knife really quickly no matter the quality of the blade, average user probably won't really notice it, but once you've cut veggies with an actual razor-sharp knife, you'll feel the difference.
I use a cheap carbon steel knife and sharpen it myself, but I can imagine that seeing a turd abuse your expensive precious knife after you specifically told them not to is pretty infuriating.

[Anonymous No.6378732]

>>6378694
Why do so many of you pair up with mentally deranged people?

[Anonymous No.6378739]

>>6378732

Unfortunately anon, all women are crazy.

[Anonymous No.6378745]

>>6378668
fuck you, im not sorting my plastics by number.
if its plastic, it goes in the bin labeled plastic

[Anonymous No.6378751]

>>6378679
Whats the difference between a kia and a Cadillac?

[Anonymous No.6378754]

>>6378041
>>6378041
My roomate rarely eats real meat that doesnt come on a frozen pizza or inside some sort of other frozen pizza flavored item. He says he doesnt like eating 'just pieces of meat'

>steaks go on sale
>decide to be nice to roomie and buy him one cause he my bro
>Let him girll it himself
>grills it until its dry as fuck and starts curling up at the edges
>takes it off the grill and slathers it in mustard
>compalins it is hard to chew
>never bought him a steak again

[Anonymous No.6378779]

>>6377904
>paying $200 for a knife that can be dulled in 10 minutes

[Anonymous No.6378783]

>>6377866
>>6378118
>>6378430
Do you guys not believe in vaccines too?

[Anonymous No.6378789]

>>6377915
My room will be a shithole, but I will always clean up the kitchen or living room if I make a mess. It's just being courteous.

[Anonymous No.6378819]

>>6378399
>tuna, eggs, chicken
I thought he didn't eat meat?

[Anonymous No.6378824]

>>6378732

...because you don't discover their worst habits until several months after moving in?

[Anonymous No.6378990]

>>6378337
Guess you miss all the shots you don't take.

[Anonymous No.6378993]

[Anonymous No.6379014]

ITT: Spineless faggots can't call their roommates out on their bullshit.

[Anonymous No.6379024]

>>6378607
>literally finds the equivalent of putting shapes in matching holes too difficult

[Anonymous No.6379040]

>Roommate is a great guy
>complete noob in the kitchen, but he tries and takes my council
>never had a problem
>his only fault is that he doesn't like mushrooms

get on my level fags

[Anonymous No.6379051]

>>6379014
You have no friends, am I right? People prefer tact and respect. Even if they're fucked up and idiotic. Treat people with respect and you will get results. Stop being a 20 year old.

[Anonymous No.6379056]

>"I'm really tired of doing the dishes all the time, we should buy a dishwasher"
>did the dishes like 9-10 times since we started living together, which was almost two years ago

[Anonymous No.6379058]

>>6379051

Or you could just ask them to stop misusing your knife instead of just saying HEY RETARD FAGGOT DONT USE MY FUCKING KNIFE WOW WHAT THE FUCK

[Anonymous No.6379069]

>>6379051
Are you retarded? You can call someone out while having tact and being respectful. Nice job just exposing yourself on being someone with shitty social skills.

[Anonymous No.6379074]

>>6379058
You are a difficult person. I'd be your friend just to see if I could correct you.

[Anonymous No.6379081]

>>6379074

I'm not the guy you originally replied to, also how is not being passive aggressive and actually addressing problems the same as being difficult? You make no sense.

[Anonymous No.6379094]

>>6378694
>buys hamburger meat and eats it raw with just a fork and some salt to go with it
What?

[Anonymous No.6379110]

>>6379081
Being direct isn't being sensitive. Even the most hard core guy should be treated with respect and sensitivity.

Come on. If you felt you were 100% correct, would you want your good friend berating you,

[Anonymous No.6379112]

>>6379056
I know a guy who complains that he "cleans all the time", but still somehow leaves the place looking like a tip. I didn't reall get it until I was over once for a bbq and watched him randomly shove the vacuum cleaner over the one patch of clear floor for maybe ten minutes.

It's like kids having a big strop over chores, if they just got on with it properly it'd take a tenth of the time and effort.

[Anonymous No.6379113]

when I moved in with my roommate I gave him a quick crashcourse on how to use proper knives and also told him that misusing my knives will terminate the friendship

never had a problem

if you want people to respect certain things you care about then you got to make that clear

[Anonymous No.6379115]

>>6379024
>implying holes aren't complicated

[Anonymous No.6379117]

>>6379024
kek'd hard

[Anonymous No.6379120]

>>6379110

politely addressing a problem is not berating, are you autistic or something?

[Anonymous No.6379123]

>>6379069
>someone with shitty social skills
That's like 90% of the people on 4chan.

Anyway:
>Spend two years doing maintenance for a museum's field research station in the mountains
>Saw trees, fix buildings, tinker with generators, smooth trails
>Get to live in a snug little cabin tucked away in the forest and backing up to a burbling creek
>Cabin came totally furnished, with a sweet kitchen setup
>Iaminheaven.jpeg
>Year two rolls around
>Museum partners up with a university and lets researchers use the field station
>Management people decide grad students should stay in my cabin with me
>One guy studying bees shows up in late spring
>Followed shortly by a botanist
>For first few weeks they're in and out sporadically, always eat out in nearby town
>This isn't so bad
>Then they get comfortable
>Bee guy leaves bowls full of alcohol and dead bees all over the kitchen
>Plant guy has habit of drinking half a beer, putting bottle down, forgetting about it, then getting another beer
>Downstairs and porch soon covered in dead bees and stale beer
>Bitch at them and they clean it up
>They can't cook for shit
>Always setting off smoke alarm
>Don't do dishes
>Leave huge messes and then disappear back to university for a few days
>I get a few days off, go visit a friend
>Come back
>Where is all my food?
>Bee guy, "Oh, we needed space in the fridge. It's in the cooler."
>Cooler is on back porch
>Correction: cooler WAS on back porch
>Bears have ransacked it in the past 3 days
>Samples of dead bees and plants fill the fridge
>Piles of greasy dishes and burned half-eaten food in the sink
>Complain to management
>Get chewed out for "being unfriendly to our partners"
>This shit continues for the rest of the summer
>They finally leave when fall semester starts
>3 weeks of peace to myself
>Get notice that another grad student will be joining me in my cabin in another week for the remainder of the fall
>Turn in my resignation two days later
Sucked. I loved that job.

[Anonymous No.6379196]

>>6377857
Omg my roomate likes talking to me....why God, whyyyyyy!

[Anonymous No.6379200]

>>6377904
>>6378493

ITT: knife amateurs who learned how to sharpen knives through YouTube videos

You can't determine how good you are at sharpening knives merely by the time it takes to get them "sharp."

Sharp by what metric? Is the knife stainless, high carbon stainless, or carbon steel? What kind of knife is it, a double bevel chefs knife, or single bevel? Stamped or true forged?

Any amateur can sharpen a knife that can pop hairs, but it takes a specially trained chef or knife sharpener to sharpen a knife that can maintain its edge and without destroying or excessively rounding its original bevel.

It takes 5 minutes for me to sharpen my 270 cm molybdenum gyuto, because most cooks in traditional Japanese restaurants don't really give a shit how sharp their gyutos are. We use it to portion big vegetables, blocks of semi frozen meat, and acidic ingredients.

We do take our time to sharpen our wabochos, or traditional single bevel knives. For example, it takes me 10 minutes to sharpen my 210mm kasumi usuba with a 1000 grit stone, another 10 minutes on my 6000 grit, another 5 minutes on my 10000 grit, and a further 5 minutes to polish the entire bevel to prevent staining.

For my honyaki yanagi, I do a daily maintenance sharpening on a 3000 grit for 5 minutes. But once it gets dull after a couple of months, it takes at least an hour to regain its edge while preserving its bevel, and that doesn't include the time it takes to fix my sharpening stones.

My point is that anyone who makes sweeping statements about how good you are at sharpening your knife because it takes you 5 minutes to make it "sharp," are internet experts who spend more time talking about their knives than actually using it for their job.

[Anonymous No.6379207]

>>6379040
Co děláš, ty kofolo, na mým /ck/?

[Anonymous No.6379215]

>>6379200
checked

[Anonymous No.6379219]

>>6377761
I use a kukri.

[Anonymous No.6379222]

>>6379200
sup Ken-Sama

[Anonymous No.6379235]

>>6379200

And I just realized this thread is about shitty roommates, not knives.

So here's my contribution

>moved into company dorm at my new job (traditional restaurant in Tokyo that's been around since the Meiji era)
>my job as a newbie for the first year is to wash dishes, scrub pots, sort inventory, descale fish, clean vegetables, and be the head chef's personal servant
>for roughly 16 hours a day
>when I come back to my dorm all exhausted, I spend another couple hours doing all of the senpais' personal laundry and grocery shopping
>they purposely make my life harder by leaving their shit lying all over the rooms for me to pick up after
>have to clean up their cum crusted pajamas too
>all while having a smile on my face, because I'll get beaten if I frowned

That was about 6 years ago. Now the restaurant decided to go corporate, no "abuse or hazing" is tolerated. We basically have to put up with fresh culinary school brats' moaning and bitching, and put up with their crap because if they call the head office and complain that they think they're being "abused," everybody gets shit from corporate. We can't even yell at them to keep their rooms tidy.

[Anonymous No.6379242]

>>6379200
I pull mine through a ceramic shear and then use the honing steel. Takes 30 seconds, pleb.

[Anonymous No.6379265]

>>6379242

And it also takes 30 seconds in a commercial microwave to heat up a frozen pizza.

[Anonymous No.6379291]

>>6378411

>someone works full time
>part time job on top of it

full time school is not equivalent to a full time job, it is hardly the same as a part time job. if it is, you are in med school, or your coursework is beyond you.

you have two part time jobs and can't do the dishes every day.

when I was a kid I did a family of fours dishes every day for 5 dollars a week AND went to school AND played intramural sports.

you are lazy.

[Anonymous No.6379382]

>>6377761
>using a glass cutting board for anything but cocaine

[Anonymous No.6379399]

>>6377921
>it's extremely annoying to have your roommate always be home
He's never not. I want him to get friends

[Anonymous No.6379400]

>>6379382
Exactly. Finally someone with a brain.

[Anonymous No.6379401]

>>6379123
Why didn't you move your belongings to your room and have a lock installed on your door? That solved (nearly) all my problems when I had to share my apartment with human waste of life

[Anonymous No.6379412]

>>6378569
just soften up a little and you can become bros with the lezzies

[Anonymous No.6379422]

>300 lb roommate goes to /fit/ one day and decides he's going to be super healthy
>his room is right next to the kitchen
>so literally every time you go to make something to eat he's there to 'give advice'
>"anon you shouldn't have that for breakfast"
>it's a bowl of bran flakes
>okay what are you going to have for breakfast?
>"I dunno probably a couple of hotpockets"
>every fucking meal
>every FUCKING DAY

>chips are on sale when we go to stock up on food
>bf and I buy one bag of sun chips that will last us more than a week
>roommate buys six bags of lays for himself, stocks them in his room

>come home and one entire frozen pizza is gone
>oh roomie did you have anyone over while we were out?
>nah I was hungry so I had a pizza
>a large supreme pizza by himself

>he whines that he's too lazy to go to the gym and we have to 'remind him'
>roomie go to the gym
>"okay in a little bit"
>roomie go to the gym
>"yeah just let me finish this quest" (WoW)
>he goes once in a two week period
>and I shit you not comes back to show off how his biceps are coming along
>makes us both feel his arms
>"yeah I'm really looking buff! I'm gonna reward myself"
>he goes and gets two burgers for himself

At first I really thought he was trolling, but now...

[Anonymous No.6379478]

>>6379112
>It's like kids
hence the term "manchild"

[Anonymous No.6379505]

>>6377893
>being this much of a virgin

[Anonymous No.6379518]

>>6377761
>roommate uses microwave defroster and doesnt flip it over
>we end up with half cooked bulk hamburger and chicken all the time
>he cant plan so just put the meat in the fridge a day or 2 before like I do
>Opened a jar of pasta sauce and used a 6th of it when he knows I'm gonna use the whole thing
>Put it back in the cabinet so we could all get food poisoning
>stepped up on me when I said something about it
>all he cooks is rice, chicken, tomatoes, and onions
>leaves at least half a cup or rice in the pot in the sink

[Anonymous No.6379551]

>>6378251
Busy != important.
calm down, honey.

[Anonymous No.6379557]

>>6378337
Even if this is a joke you're still pathetic.

[Anonymous No.6379570]

>roomate constantly makes ramen
>has a special 'ramen bowl' which is just a big tupperware container
>never washes it just rinses between feedings
>his ramen meal consists of two or three packets
>breaks each ramen chunk into two pieces and puts it in his ramen bowl
>fills it with water to the brim
>mashes a random number on the microwave
>takes it out once its mush
>drains all the water
>mixes in all the flavor packets
>sometimes he adds mustard, sriracha, or both
>always adds nasty things like pepperoni
>complains about his stomach ulcers

>always buts into my business when im cooking
>sticks his face in pans of cooking food and wafts the smell to his face as if hes some chef admiring his creation
>Anon that reeks
>no matter what im cooking

>only 'real' meal he knows how to make is pasta with some sort of canned sauce
>makes a new batch every week
>leaves GIGANTIC bowl of pasta in fridge
>always smells
>takes up exorbitant amounts of fridge real estate

[Anonymous No.6379575]

>>6378118
>hypothetical where everyone recycles say, aluminum cans
>cost of aluminum goes down
>soda companies spend less on aluminum
>lower prices on their products
>repeat scenario for multiple materials and industries
>continue implying recycling does not benefit you

[Anonymous No.6379611]

>>6379570
I'm actually a fridge real estate agent

[Anonymous No.6379649]

>>6379611
Can you help me?

[Anonymous No.6379744]

This thread made me reconsider setting up a roommate situation. I live alone but I figured the extra cash would be nice especially since I have a bed and bath room that is completely empty in my townhouse.

[Anonymous No.6379759]

>tfw my 2 roommates are cooks
>tfw im also a cook
>tfw one is Spanish and other is Mexican
>tfw everything is delicious when we manage to cook

[Anonymous No.6379802]

>>6379744
Just screen your applicats, these are mostly from college and college housing bullshit

[Anonymous No.6379809]

>>6379557
Someone post the pic he's referencing

[Anonymous No.6379815]

>>6379744
Best tip I can give you is don't room with friends. Sounds swell in concept, but you will either stay friends or come to hate each other.

[Anonymous No.6379819]

>>6378607
Fucktard.

[Anonymous No.6379822]

>>6379557
>>6379809

[Anonymous No.6379824]

>>6378288
We have a shit electrical stove, thank god. If we didn't my roommate would've muslimed the place long ago
>falls asleep on the couch with bacon cooking in his george foreman
>plays CS and forgets he's boiling water, comes out of his room when the apartment has an indescribable hot metal smell
>all the water is gone
>fucking RUNS IT UNDER COLD WATER
That pot is no longer round, needless to say

[Anonymous No.6379830]

>>6379422
That's so sad. That poor soul.

[Anonymous No.6379834]

>>6379575
>implying a lowered cost of aluminum benefits me
I don't want to get too specific, but I'm a descendant of Alfred Aluminum.

[Anonymous No.6379838]

>>6377929
You should cut him out of your life, people like that are dangerous once they lose their shit and their mind completely degrades to barbarism, which it sounds like is already happening.

I had a best friend of like 16 years who was always an acloholic, but in the past few years he become a pill popper. popping all kinds of goofballs, and it wasn't long after that he started shooting up heroin, and then I found out he was date raping girls by drugging them with heroin because they would wake up and not remember what the fuck happened so he didn't get caught. He told me he killed a girl because she had a bad reaction to it and wouldn't stop screaming.

Needless to say I reported him to the police and I consider him a vicious enemy. He also came to my house while I was at work, and my girlfriend let him in because she didn't know anything other than he was an old friend, and he knocked her out and stole a bunch of shit.

[Anonymous No.6379843]

>>6379815
This for sure. The best roommate is an acquaintance, someone you know but aren't best friends with. Then you can keep things cordial but enforce rules.

[Anonymous No.6379854]

>>6378157
Why not get a ceramic pan then?

[Anonymous No.6379858]

>>6377921

How many hour a week do you work? If you work anything under 60 then you can't moan.

[Anonymous No.6379861]

>>6378694
>buys hamburger meat and eats it raw with just a fork and some salt to go with it
>tfw your roommate also does pic related

[Anonymous No.6379865]

>>6379854

Why would I buy a ceramic pan? They suck.

[Anonymous No.6379873]

> move to apartment in Brooklyn I found off Craigslist
> guy living there asks if he can borrow one of my saucepans to cook
> he was boiling water to shoot heroin
>mfw

[Anonymous No.6379874]

>>6379865
green pans are pretty good, at least for eggs. Its the only good thing my roommate brought in the house.

[Anonymous No.6379881]

>>6377921
You work full time and can't afford your own place? Do you work at taco bell?

[Anonymous No.6379894]

>>6379873
Gotta give him credit. Most junkies don't bother boiling water.

[Anonymous No.6379953]

>>6379861
Fucking can't wait for season 5 of Louie to come out.

[Anonymous No.6379995]

>>6377761
>keeping anything worth more than $10 within reach of your roommates
You asked for it

[Anonymous No.6380002]

>>6378607
fag

[Anonymous No.6380060]

>>6378324

Dude meat's hella cheap like 2 bucks a pound why do you care. You want rent? That shit's just a couple hundred bucks a month, a WHOLE MONTH that's like nothing

[Anonymous No.6380069]

>live alone for two years
>get used to having everything perfectly tidy
>move in with best female friend
>we've never had even a smallest fight before
>she just started uni; it's her first time away from home
>uses a knife to slice bread or for butter
>leaves it in the sink
>why.jpg
>over time starts leaving more and more stuff in the sink
>has no dishes of her own; uses mine
>starts having new uni friends over; uses all of my cups and spoons for coffee and stuff
>have to hide a cup and a teaspoon for personal use in my room
>sink now regularly overflowing with her dirty dishes
>have to use the bathroom sink to wash mine
>regularly forgets to shut off the stove
>starts leaving food in pots on the stove
>rotting soup just chilling there for weeks
>we start running low on plates and cutlery
>had to use spoons instead of forks a couple of times
>eventually figure out that i have to hide a fork, a spoon and a knife for personal use
>one day she asks me if i've got all of the forks
>i say no, and ask her to look in her room, there's no other place for them to be
>she says she doesn't have them
>she leaves her room open one day
>take a peek

(1/2)

[Anonymous No.6380078]

>>6380069

>a couple of plates with cutlery and bits of food under the bed, a couple on the shelf, a couple underneath the table
>cups with rock-solid coffee remains
>over time she completely stopped washing the dishes that have accumulated in the sink
>remains start rotting in there
>rotting food in the fridge as well
>one day find the rice bowl that mom gave me as a gift when i started living alone broken
>she also never threw away the garbage
>i once decided to not throw it away, and just observe the results
>i then left home for the winter break
>return a couple of times
>over the weeks the kitchen became unusable from the smell
>bags and bags of trash

Anyway, she finally decided to pull it together after she finished her finals - she washed all of the dishes in the kitchen and in her room, and actually threw away the garbage (the only time for a year that we've been living together). Which was about a month or two after any of that started piling up. Holy shit I'm still mad. Everyone's reaction to the fact that I was living with a girl friend was 'ooooh, will it lead to something'. No, it fucking won't, I'm still disgusted.
This (next) year I moved in with a male friend and everything is perfectly clean.

(2/2)

[Anonymous No.6380080]

>>6380069
Some people are ignorant. They aren't being offensive. Talk to her. Educate her.

[Anonymous No.6380088]

>>6377904
well duh, if it can be dulled by a cutting board, of course it's some shitty steel. that's not the point, the point is op should learn to take care of his shit instead of just whining about things

[Anonymous No.6380104]

>>6379123
>Plant guy has habit of drinking half a beer, putting bottle down, forgetting about it, then getting another beer

this would torture me.

[Anonymous No.6380109]

>>6378192
> ZDP-189 Spydercos and CPM-s30V Benchmades

Are those Acer mice

[Anonymous No.6380156]

>>6379575
metal is the only material where recycling is cost-effective. recycling is faggy otherwise

[Anonymous No.6380175]

>>6379575
>implying overhead savings are passed on to the consumer instead of padding the bottom line

[Anonymous No.6380178]

>>6378694

Motherfucker. Seriously.

[Anonymous No.6380181]

>>6377796
I bet you use a glass cutting board too.
That's why you so mad.

[Anonymous No.6380221]

>>6377761
>living with roommates

Why man?

[Anonymous No.6380371]

>>6380175
This. I doubt companies would start giving back to their customers, rather than keep more of the profits because the customers are already paying for the shit anyway.

[Anonymous No.6380375]

>>6379401
>move belongings to room
Move what? My food that needed refrigeration? Also, the only room in the cabin that had a door was the bathroom. It was a historic building that the museum tried to keep close to its original state aside from the kitchen and the plumbing.

I also didn't go into detail about the shit way these guys behaved. A brief summary:
>I have to get out at the crack of dawn for work
>They decide to get drunk on the porch and watch True Blood on Bee Guy's laptop at loud volume
>Constantly complaining about being in beautiful mountains away from city and GFs
>Fucking up some of the museum's ongoing research programs
>Not telling people what they're doing so our staff would find some of their research stuff, think it was vandalism, and clean it up
>Being absolute pussies about snakes and bears, but throw food trash outside the cabin and the lodge where the summer camp kids stayed

[Anonymous No.6380589]

>>6378751
the Kia will still be running in 10 years

[Anonymous No.6380632]

>>6379861
well eating 'hamburger meat' raw isn't that awkward believe me...

[Anonymous No.6380918]

>>6380589
it'll be in shambles in 10 years if not in 3.

[Anonymous No.6380930]

>>6378288
>your kitchen smells of gas
>your room smells of linens

[Anonymous No.6380945]

>>6379412
nah man. they're former shardheads and just the shittiest type of people.
fuck em. the silence between us is actually my ideal.

[Anonymous No.6381081]

My roommate is pretty solid now that he's fixed this problem.

>Roommate makes large batches of food for the whole week
>Oversteams broccoli and brown rice till it's mush
>Leaves it out on counter, steaming hot, for hours when I'm not home
>All door and windows closed
>Hours
>HOURS
>Walking in the door is like walking into a wall of smell
>Entire house smells like rotting garbage for multiple days even with windows open to air it out
>He doesn't smell a fucking thing and doesn't see problem

I swear to god, his nose doesn't work. It's not the first unpleasant smell he's completely missed. He's also got a compost that he keeps in the house. He would leave shit there for weeks. Smelled fucking awful. He had no idea. I had to sit him down multiple times to talk about this and invoke witnesses other than myself because he was convinced I was just exaggerating or had an unusually sensitive nose.

[Anonymous No.6381090]

anyone else have a roommate that actually eats these?
I just made them a pb&j to demonstrate just how little time it took in comparison to waiting for a frozen version of the same thing to defrost.

[Anonymous No.6381144]

>>6379843

I don't really understand this, is it really that much of a strain to have rules and remain friends?

I don't room with any friends (yet), but all of us are with the understanding that there will be expectations to how our home will be maintained.

Perhaps my friends and I are of a unique situation or just very naive. Regardless I don't believe for one second the best roommate is a borderline stranger. I would much rather enjoy the company of someone I share my home with.

[Anonymous No.6381168]

>>6377761
Had a friend live with me for a while. He used metal cooking implements in my nonstick pan. It was ceramic with a zinc core, but either way there were some gouges in the coating and it is no longer so non-stick.

It was only a 30 dollar pan or so. Which is quite a lot really, but not too terrible. Wasn't too happy, had to tell him twice, happened multiple times.

[Anonymous No.6381184]

>>6377808
>not shopping together while holding hands and being best friends and looking out for each other

Are you some kind of robot?

[Anonymous No.6381195]

Man, all these stories make me happy that I bit the bullet and just paid extra instead of finding a roommate.
I had less money for food in the beginning, but things are better now at least.

I remember going over to people that lived together.
It's just lord of the flies in places like that. I remember that they literally drew lines in the kitchen when they had arguments.

Never ever will I move in with people I barely know.

[Anonymous No.6381218]

>>6377761
>>6377761

>moved in with people from school
> one stabbed me in the back with a kitchen knife
> the other moved out and somehow managed to claim fraid on all the rent he paid for 2 months. not only his rent but we also gave him roommmate #1's money. So he robbed us for like $1500.

> figure the worst is over, move
> rent a room in a house, first ones there.
> after several weeks, landlord moves in people that are crazy and talk to themselves. The police have been here every day for 2 months straight. They told him he can't have more then 6 peolpe in the house and he has like 10 and keeps adding people.

obviously the bums are retarded. i caught one using a fork to scrape burned something (didnt use oil at all) from my nonstick pan. Pan was beyond ruined.

[Anonymous No.6381236]

>roommate is a basic white vegetarian
>runs the dishwasher every couple of days because she only uses utensils once and then chucks them into the dishwasher
>tfw I see the water bill
>she eats pizza and salad almost every day

[Anonymous No.6381248]

>taking out roommate's trash
>try to dump the contents into a larger bag
>huge cloud of dark dust explodes in my face
>caked on my eyelids
>choking on it
>look into the bottom of the trashcan and see what looks like lint from the dryer
>it's actually gray cakey orange peels from a thousand years ago and I just inhaled about a kilo of mold spores

Th-thanks

[Anonymous No.6381312]

>>6378751
>Whats the difference between a kia and a Cadillac?

>>6380589
>the Kia will still be running in 10 years

[Anonymous No.6381323]

Whelp, haven't seen it, so I'll dump LazyFat.

[Anonymous No.6381341]

>wiping up mess on bench with sponge
>same sponge we use for plates
>roommate flips out and demands I don't do it anymore or we can't live together

So /ck/, are you an indiscriminate sponge user or not?

[Anonymous No.6381498]

>>6379235

This is the plot of what yaoi manga?

>Amazing story bruh

[Anonymous No.6381506]

>don't have a roommate
>don't fall for knife scams either

[Anonymous No.6381725]

>>6381323
holy fuck, l e l

[Anonymous No.6381728]

>>6377761
>living with roommates
>having a $200 knife

Priorities, man

[Anonymous No.6381734]

>>6379422
>one entire frozen pizza
they're not that big

[Anonymous No.6381772]

>>6379040
fuck you dude, now I want kofola.

Where the fuck do you even get kofola in Canada?

>>6379123
That story legitimately made me sad. I'm sorry dude.

[Baird !supERrmOTo No.6381998]

>have a few nice Wustholf knives
>remind roommate incessantly not to be fucks with them
>friend of ours comes over to make THC candies in our kitchen because it makes the whole house smell like pot for a few days and he lives at home still
>makes a few batches, shit isn't half bad even though I don't like smoking pot
>he starts cleaning up
>walk back into kitchen
>he's trying to pry rock hard pot candy out of the mixing spoon with my $80 paring knife

I went full autism on him. I think I went overboard because he mentions how sorry he is every time he's in my kitchen.

[Baird !supERrmOTo No.6382010]

>>6381998
>have big ass house parties sometimes
>people generally respect our shit because it's 95% people we know
>drinking games in the attic, smokers downstairs in the living room (pot only)
>come downstairs
>friend of mine is cleaning his glass bowl with my $80 paring knife
What is it about stoners? They love food, they should know better.

[Anonymous No.6382014]

>>6381998
Filtered.

[Anonymous No.6382278]

>>6379235

Are you now a master in Ninjitsu or something like the Bride in Kill Bill?

[Anonymous No.6382316]

>>6382014

[Anonymous No.6382317]

>>6381998
>owning an 80 buck pairing knife

Its as if you like the idea of cooking more than actually cooking

[Baird !supERrmOTo No.6382339]

>>6382317
You can either go to Williams Sonoma and get a nice knife with some quality steel that will hold an edge or you can go to Macy's and get Faberware that will cut just as well but require being sharpened all the time. I chose the former, do whatever you want.

[Anonymous No.6382360]

>>6382339
You open yourself up to roomate issues then

[Anonymous No.6383463]

>>6379422
TFW /fa/ggot /fit/izen from /k/ and /diy/

Life is fucking difficult, I notice people fuck up everything all the time

> fat fucks
> telling people what to eat
> ever

Getting /fit/ is actually a lengthy process, and takes up a load of time

[Anonymous No.6383510]

>live alone
>everything is the way i want it to be
>life is good