/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.6122207]

Why does it seem like northern Europe has terrible food, some of the worst in the world, while southern Europe has amazing food, some of the best in the world?

I keep trying German food and keep being disappointed. The majority, prepared correctly mind you, is barely edible, whether from a restaurant or storebought or homemade. Pumpernickel I couldn't even choke down, it had such an assaulting flavor. I bought turnips on a whim and made himmel und erde (mashed potato, turnip, and apple.) It was disgusting. It was like a foul version of mashed potatoes from hell. I turned it into a soup to cover up the flavor just to manage to eat it. 100% stuck to the recipe and it didn't taste off, just bad, like a similar flavor to every other german food I've had. Bitter, bland, and stuffy. Scandinavians eat rotten fish. British food is infamously bad. France, Italy, and Greece have amazing food, on the other hand. I've never had anything Italian that wasn't divinely delicious.

If northern Europeans are master race, why is their food so atrocious? How do they even manage to live when their cuisine is so disgusting that I'd rather go hungry? Name one northern dish worth eating.

[Anonymous No.6122218]

>>6122207

Climate.

Northern Europe = cold = limited as to what grows and lives there.

Southern Europe is much warmer and therefore has a much greater variety of ingredients available. Many herbs and spices only grow in a tropical or subtropical climate.

>>Scandinavians eat rotten fish
Everyone eats rotten fish. Worcestershire sauce is a great example that is very popular in the West.

[Anonymous No.6122222]

>>6122207
>Pumpernickel I couldn't even choke down
what the hell is wrong with you? pumpernickel is fucking awesome. what about wiener schnitzel, who doesn't like that?

[Anonymous No.6122280]

their food isn't atrocious, you just personally don't like it.

[Anonymous No.6122284]

>>6122207
What about hot dogs and burgers? They're German and 90% of Americans seem to eat them so they can't be that bad

[Anonymous No.6122323]

>>6122284

I don't like either and never have, no matter who makes it or how the quality is. Italian sausage is okay, dem fennel seeds. Both kielbasa and bratwurst are unappealing. So in the category of sausage, southern wins again.

Shepherd's pie is good. Meat pies in general. Hard apple cider is great. That's about it for northern european cuisine that is edible.

[Anonymous No.6122340]

People have a really ignorant view of Scandinavian cuisine.

>muh surströmming
>muh lutefisk

[Anonymous No.6122346]

>>6122340

Then enlighten us. What's a scandinavian recipe I can make with standard american grocery store items that is good?

[Anonymous No.6122347]

>>6122323

>uk
>northern european

[Anonymous No.6122348]

>>6122323

Used to make these as a student and they were great:

1 soft small baguette (not the hard french kind)
1 hotdog

poke a hole in the end of the baguette squirt in ketchup/mustard.

Can add cheese or fried onions if you want.

insert hotdog into baguette

mess free hotdog

[Anonymous No.6122350]

>>6122347

>muh continent

The UK is part of northern europe, this is not debatable

[Anonymous No.6122361]

>>6122348
>1 soft small baguette (not the hard french kind)

well it's not a fucking baguette then is it ?

[Anonymous No.6122363]

>>6122207
We have plenty of good food, but as someone else said, the climate limited our cuisine. As a result, we have a lot of fatty food and food that's made to be preserved, so that we had something to eat during winter, at sea or during long journeys in our sparesely populated countries.
That being said, our constant struggle against nature has made us highly efficient, quality oriented and very good at utilizing everything to its maximum potential, which is likely why we're completely dominating the Bocuse d'Or.

[Anonymous No.6122364]

>>6122323
Germany has a lot of good sausages, you just have to try them. I for one like Frankfurter, Weisswurst and Regensburger. Bratwurst and Currywurst are very popular as well.

In terms of dishes you could try Schnitzel and Spätzle or Knöpfle, Bratkartoffeln or different kinds of Braten. There's a whole lot variety of breads and pastries there as well.

Strudel, cakes, tarts, krapfen, marzipan. lebkuchen, stollen are popular desserts.

[Anonymous No.6122369]

>>6122348
>a Baguette is distinguishable by its length and crisp crust.

[Anonymous No.6122375]

>>6122350
it is very debatable.

Europe is a land mass approximately 26 miles across the English Channel from Great Britain.

>wanna borrow an atlas?

[Anonymous No.6122376]

>>6122222
>what about wiener schnitzel, who doesn't like that?
Wiener Schnitzel isn't German.

[Anonymous No.6122380]

>>6122361
>>6122369

You both knew what i meant and because of that fact I was not wrong in calling it a soft french baguette.

[Anonymous No.6122382]

>>6122376
>wiener schnitzel

Austrian

[Anonymous No.6122386]

>>6122375

>what is a continental plate

[Anonymous No.6122391]

>>6122380
fair dues I guess.
Enjoy the baguette ;-)

[Anonymous No.6122398]

>>6122207
Northern people are more reliant on animal products and preserved vegetables than southerners, who have a longer growing season, and thus access to more fresh vegetables.

So if I wanted great vegetable dishes I'd go for southern, hands down. But for preserved animal products the northerners will have amazing stuff because they had no choice but to come up with it. Amazing stuff from northerners will include:
Cheeses
Beer
Sausages
Speck/bacon
Smoked/pickled fish
Roast/stewed/braised meats

All of the above are delicious. Of course a steady diet of this stuff is the reason northerners have higher blood pressure than southerners. For day to day eating I'd rather go with olive oil slicked vegetables, but there's no denying the deliciousness of northerners' clever preservation of animal products.

[Anonymous No.6122407]

>>6122398

Don't forget jams and preserves (in the marmalade sense, not the salami sense)

[Anonymous No.6122416]

>>6122346
Fårikål.

Mutton with bone.
Cabbage.

Layer in a big ass pan, mutton, cabbage, mutton, cabbage etc.

Whole black pepper and a bit of salt.
Bit of water.

Let that shit simmer on low for hours, add in more water to not let it dry.
Serve with potatoes.

Western Norwegian cuisine easily made in any country. Classical autumn dish.

[Anonymous No.6122418]

>>6122416

sounds pretty tasty to be honest.

Do you usually serve it with a lingonberry preserve, seems like it would go well with that?

[Anonymous No.6122420]

>>6122418
Nope.

[Anonymous No.6122425]

>>6122364

I went to a restaurant (admittedly probably not the best quality restaurant) and got a German sausage sampler. I hated everything. I don't know specifically what kinds, but there were five different ones.

Desserts are cheating. Everything tastes good covered in sugar and butter.

I'll make schnitzel next time I have pork on hand. Seems very plain. Bratkartoffeln is home fries but with boiled potatoes, bacon, and onion? Sounds inferior.

[Anonymous No.6122430]

>>6122420

kk, i'm going to give this a go.

Thanks anon

[Anonymous No.6122433]

>>6122430
Just remember to cut the cabbage in wedges.

[Anonymous No.6122446]

>>6122398
>Cheeses

Greek and Italian cheeses are best.

Maybe the problem is I'm used to a mainly vegetable and milk/egg diet, and northern diet is meat focused. 2expensive4me. Is there any non-wheat, non-meat, low-calorie northern european food that is good? Or is it all fat-choked and calorie dense?

I haven't liked the few german import beers I've had, but if you name a few that I might be able to find, I'll give it another try.

[Anonymous No.6122449]

>>6122425
>I'll make schnitzel next time I have pork on hand.
Well there's your problem idiot.

[Anonymous No.6122450]

>Nice troll post

[Anonymous No.6122456]

>>6122416

Mutton isn't something I've found in stores. What is a good approximation?

Pretty much boiled cabbage and meat, then? It doesn't sound appealing. Cabbage is only good stir-fried in heavy spice.

[Anonymous No.6122462]

>>6122418
Fårikål (literally 'lamb in cabbage') is great. You also have Sosekjott ('sauce meat'), which used to be the traditional sunday dinner here in Bergen.
It's basically beef, onions, potatoes, mushrooms and carrots cooked in a thick brown sauce. Not entirely sure if the potatoes are served on the side or if they're cooked with the rest.
Everything you put in there becomes extremely tender and melts in your mouth. It's also a very flavorful dish.

[Anonymous No.6122468]

>>6122456
>Cabbage is only good stir-fried in heavy spice.
You obviously know little of the wonders of cabbage.

[Anonymous No.6122472]

>>6122456

Muttom is simply sheeps meat.

Its just a much tougher lamb meat which si why its best for slow cooked dishes.

[Anonymous No.6122477]

>>6122456
>Mutton isn't something I've found in stores.
The fuck? I know we joke about the US being a third world country, but seriously?

As for Fårikål, it's far tastier than it sounds and looks, and there's a surprising amount of flavor in it, with the whole peppercorns giving it that extra edge. It's also extremely tender.

[Anonymous No.6122494]

Generally speaking, areas of the world with greater amounts of edible biodiversity will have more varied and delicious cuisines while those with less tend not.

Some of these countries with a smaller number of common edible plants and animals do some of what few dishes they do have very, very well but the majority will generally be bland or one note, like comparing Polish food, which has a number of very, VERY delicious dishes but mostly bland, boring stuff with Italian food, which has mostly flavourful dishes but very few that are actually knock-your-socks-off good.

At least, that's how it seems to me. Could be a case of 'grass is always greener' because I am from Italy and I just find it quite literally 'everyday.' Because that's what it is. Everyday.

Simple question. Simple answer.

[Anonymous No.6122518]

>>6122456
the cabbage is going to be much better cooked in all of the good mutton stuff, the taste is nothing like boiled cabbage

[Anonymous No.6122524]

>>6122207
First off, Germany is in Western Europe, which is where France is. You did know that France and Germany are right fucking next to each other didn't you? Or are you literally retarded? Northern Europe would include the UK, Ireland, and the Scandinavian and Baltic countries.

Not only are you ignorant about Geography, you also are making wild claims and speculations about the cuisine of an entire region of the world.

[Anonymous No.6122533]

>>6122477
it's not unavailable, it's just that usually the only meats you have to choose from are beef, pork or chicken. (turkey too, depending on the season) Any other delicious things like goat or lamb aren't available just because they're not farm raised on insane proportions like the common megamart shit

you can always request these things at the butcher section of a megamart or go to an ethnic food store, but youll be paying more for pieces of bony goat meat than you would for sirloin steak

[Anonymous No.6122542]

>>6122533
*choose from when you walk into an average megamart)

[Anonymous No.6122543]

>>6122518
This.

This is why you use mutton on the bone. The cabbage turns into a tender sweet/savoury deliciousness.

[Anonymous No.6122557]

>>6122524
Not that guy, but the countries are very different. Germany is culturally closer to northern Europe, while France is culturally closer to the Mediterranean. They also have different climates, linguistics and ethnicities.

[Anonymous No.6122558]

>>6122542

Yeah, beef pork and chicken are really the big three. But other meats are widely available. I live in a mid-size town in Texas. The normal supermarkets carry lamb, veal, and goat--though in a smaller selection than the other meats. The local butchers have all that plus mutton, venison, and bison.

[Anonymous No.6122583]

>>6122558
Those are the same three that are popular here in Norway, but you can still get lamb/mutton in most stores, whether it's frozen, prepackaged or from the butcher section.

[Anonymous No.6122590]

>>6122558
I'm jealous of all the meat close to you in Texas

I'm from NY, so you can count my poorer selection on that

of course it's much better if you can find a true butcher but those are a dying breed

[Anonymous No.6122611]

>>6122590
I'm from NY, too, but I live in the city. Mutton is easy to find here: just go to a supermarket in a Latino neighborhood and look for goat. For some reason mutton is always mislabeled as goat in Latino markets. If you want real goat it's available at any halal market.

There are still plenty of real butchers here. Some of them still make their own sausages.

[Anonymous No.6123136]

>>6122376
The thread is about northern Europe.

[Anonymous No.6123147]

>>6122375
You're fucking retarded.

[Anonymous No.6123191]

>>6122340

>Swedes

Come one. The reason people think of surstomming and lutefisk is because they're the few Scandinavian foods which are actually distinct. Every other dish Scandinavians call "your" food is basically a dish people make everywhere else, or have a very close version. Look at the suggestions here:

>>6122416
>cabbage boiled with meat and potatoes

Pretty sure poor people eat this everywhere.

>>6122462

>meat boiled with onions and carrots

See above. What European country doesn't make this?

Most southern European, Balkan, and even some E.European countries have many dishes which are unique to their countries and taste good. Having lived in Scandinavia for two years, it's a great region, but the food is undeniably shit and food culture is essentially non existent compared to the south.

Scandinavian food is bad because up until pretty recently Scandinavia was a poor shit hole and the climate could only sustain 2% of the ingredients available in the south.

[Anonymous No.6123215]

>>6122207
Why not instead of making a northern hate thread, you make a southern appreciation thread?

/ck/ would be so much better if things operated that way.

[Anonymous No.6123226]

>>6122207
>British food is infamously bad.

NO, it's not, faggot. You've obviously never eaten it.

[Anonymous No.6123237]

[Anonymous No.6123249]

>>6122218
Half right, all the peasants live in the north while royalty thrived in the south because of the climate.

[Anonymous No.6123260]

>>6122420
why do europeans and amerilard eat meat/steaks with boiled potatoes????

fucking bland.

give me salsas, guacamole and grilled onions

[Anonymous No.6123379]

>>6123215
Because OP is interested in discovering good, Northern recipes, not bolster his insight of good Southern cuisine further.

As a Dane, however, I can mostly agree that our food is sweet, unseasoned "babyfood", where the taste of milk and sweetness is central elements. There was never a lot of greens to take from in Denmark, and as a result some of the most well-known dishes utilizing these are stews. My mom speaks of her grandmother often making cabbage stew or pea soup, and generally when a proper Danish meal was cooked in my own family, it almost always involved potatoes, meat and a sauce of some sort. However, in recent times Danish cooking has been given a lot more opportunities, and as a result these old, sad traditional dishes are being given new life. Before the 1860s we haven't had much to work with, so given some time I think good results will come up and eventually become traditional dishes.

[Anonymous No.6123501]

>>6123260

Because potatoes are a staple for us, like corn/maize in south america.

And yeah, boiled potatoes are bland on their own. But they're a great vehicle for gravy or other sauces.

[Anonymous No.6123691]

>>6122284
I don't really want to pass judgement, because I know nothing about your particular tastes, but it seems to me that you are just a picky eater who needs to grow up and try new things.

[Anonymous No.6123697]

>>6123691
sorry meant to reply to OP.

[Anonymous No.6123711]

>>6122207
> what is climate?

[Anonymous No.6123909]

>>6122380
It's neither a baguette nor is it French.

The frogs need to put a PDO on that shit. I love French bread, but I can't get it in my country because not even the expensive, high end bakeries make the bread to specifications.

[Anonymous No.6123941]

>>6123260
Staple carbs that love growing in our wet/cold land.

[Anonymous No.6123964]

>>6122207
>northern Europe
>German
>Scandinavians
>British

It's like the Iron Curtain still exists....

[Anonymous No.6124050]

>>6122207
>I keep trying German food and keep being disappointed.

you're trying the wrong things then.
go for grilled/roasted meats. pic related for example: schweinshaxe, a bavarian and austrian classic.

grilled pork leg, usually served with roast potatoes and sauerkraut.

[Anonymous No.6124052]

>>6122425

>shitty 'German' restaurant, probably in America
>herpa derpa, all German food is awful

There's a high-end Polish restaurant near me, the food is delicious, therefore all Polish food is delicious.

[Anonymous No.6124054]

>>6124050
forgot pic

[Anonymous No.6124061]

>South were once rich as fuck and due to warm climate could make whatever the fuck they want

>North had to deal with lack of crops and cold weather so stuck to basic but very filling foods

Its not exactly terrible food, it depends on how gay you are, do you prefer your food to be twinkled onto the plate by a cook that shaves his chest hair as you wait hours because this perfectionist Spanish cunt can't get the right consistency and repeats it over and over. Or are you a real man and like your meat ripped right off the fucking animal whilst it is alive, cooked up and served to you just like that, because real men don't need that pansy cuisine.

[Anonymous No.6124065]

[Anonymous No.6124085]

>>6124061
Some people don't have to resort to ridiculous, clown-like antics to prove our masculinity. Some men prove it in the bedroom as we make love to our many, many women. (and most of the northerners women too)

[Anonymous No.6124095]

>>6124085
Top kek
I've been to the south and can't stop laughing at the amount of men that shave their fucking legs and prance about in colorful hipster clothes afraid to mess up their hair. Every southern girl i fucked around Europe told me she wished there were more masculine men like me where they lived. Sure you get the odd one here and there but give it two more generations and you will see what i mean. Feels good being the only guy with chest hair getting all that easy pussy whilst you guys play it hard mode acting gay whilst claiming you are straight.

[Anonymous No.6124120]

>>6124095
Oh so you scooped up all the dumb, classless whores on the street corner? You can have them and enjoy your STD, barbarian. I'll stay with the women worth having.

[Anonymous No.6124126]

>>6124120
>Women worth having
You made my day, keep up the good comedy.

[Anonymous No.6124525]

>>6122494
>Polish food
>mostly bland
Absolutely not in my experience.
Also, I'm french.

[Anonymous No.6124546]

>>6124085
>>6124095

> brag about how many pussy you are getting on the internet
> from eachothers respective areas

wow you guys sure are classy, you don't sound like NEETs at all

[Anonymous No.6124562]

>>6122207
>Pumpernickel I couldn't even choke down
hahaha pussy

> himmel und erde
there is no turnip there dumbass

>posting in a troll thread
I know, I know

[Anonymous No.6124565]

>>6124525
> implying
the only french flavors are butter and rotten.

[Anonymous No.6124575]

Dude are you le numbnut? Italian here, just to clarify.

Germoney has amongst the best breads, soups, cakes and sausages in Yurop so get shrekked.

[Anonymous No.6124708]

>>6124525
>restaurant food is representative of home cooking
Polish restaurant food is as though crafted by the elder gods themselves. Polish home cooking, save sausages, is mostly bland and disinteresting.