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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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5174035 No.5174035 [Reply] [Original]

>never been to a nice restaurant before in my life, only mcdonalds and kebab shops
>awkward as fuck, surrounded by middle class people
>on my own with a book
>waitress thinks I don't understand how steaks are cooked
>assumes
>tells me to just relax, it's so obvious to her that I'm nervous
>Food was really, really nice
>Fucked up paying for the food

I'm scared of going to a good restaurant again, how do I make the next experience easier?

>> No.5174041

>>5174039
Why is he a cunt

>> No.5174039

Giles Coren's a cunt.

His sisters a bit of alrite, but shes also a cunt.

that is all

>> No.5174045

By going again (practice) or going with someone else to show you the ropes.

>> No.5174046

>>5174035
get drunk

Honestly, id just stick to new young people trend foods. Mexican, asian, etc. They don't give a fuck about acting pretentious.

>> No.5174047

>>5174035
Don't over-think it and try to enjoy the experience. Take everything in in wonder and amazement.

>> No.5174054

>>5174041
Because he doesn't seem to know much about what he is talking about.

>> No.5174057

>>5174054
But he has a book out and everything!

Name me a critic who knows what they're talking about

>> No.5174068

Does that book tell you what to do if the girl is really self conscious about it. Sometimes they can't even enjoy it because they're so uptight about smell and taste.

>> No.5174121

Unless you shat yourself in the middle of the restaurant anything "embarassing" you did will be a 30 second anecdote at best if anyone even remembers you. You are no where near as important/embarrassing as you think you are. That is what you should remember next time you go out alone.

>> No.5174127

>>5174121
>implying the lasting impression matters and not what is happening in the moment.

If people are clearly judging me, snickering, talking about me, etc, it doesn't really matter if they're going to go home and tell more people about it. Sure that probably makes things worse, but that's not really what the concern is in situations like this.

>> No.5174139

Is this the epic new variant on the going to the theater alone may-may?

>> No.5174148

>>5174139
Firstly, it's not a new 'variant' since it's been a consistent worry for a long time here and secondly, the closest thing to /tv/'s meme is anxiety about fast food restaurants. Going to restaurants alone is much more normal than going to the cinema alone, anyway.

And is that book any good? What does it talk about?

>> No.5174169

>>5174148
>much more normal than going to the cinema alone
I don't know where you live, but as far as I've noticed, at least half of the visitors are alone.

>> No.5174173

>>5174169
I guess that is unusual from what I've seen. I live in London and I've only ever seen groups.

>> No.5174178

>>5174035
>go in again
>order the blubber tartar
>put the waitress's tip into her bra
You're good to go.

>> No.5174202
File: 25 KB, 400x300, 1384255226817.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5174202

>>5174068
What?

>> No.5174227

>>5174068
I thought I was the only one who experienced this!

They're always so insecure about it

>> No.5174230

>>5174127
>If people are clearly judging me, snickering, talking about me, etc

that's just it... they're not, you just think they are.

>> No.5174248

>>5174227
What are they doing?
I don't understand.

>> No.5174269

>>5174248
Eating. Out.

>> No.5174281

>>5174269
What smells?
Why are they self conscious about smells?
What are the smells?

>> No.5174283

>>5174281
Salty milk and coins.

>> No.5174285

>>5174281
Bags of sand

>> No.5174287
File: 18 KB, 500x375, cupcake p.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5174287

>>5174281
"eating out" is also a slang term for cunninglingus.

>> No.5174293

>>5174287
>>5174285
>>5174283
What does this have to do with dining at a restaurant?

>> No.5174296

>>5174287
That's a massive clitoris

>> No.5174294

>>5174293
Orgasms

>> No.5174303

>>5174293
>how to eat out

>> No.5174304

>>5174303
>>5174294
I don't get it.
What are you talking about?

>> No.5174308

I don't know that book and I can't tell if OP is serious.

>> No.5174313
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5174313

>>5174304
I'm talking about love, boy, what the hell are you talking about? As in l'amour.

>> No.5174772

>>5174296
It's actually a cupcake

>> No.5174830
File: 17 KB, 320x240, 1391804985623.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5174830

>>5174772

>> No.5174839

>>5174041
>>5174039
why are we discussing this? the author clearly agrees and felt it important enough to warrent a quote from gordon on the cover of his book. you don't think that says twit do you?

>> No.5174850
File: 41 KB, 351x359, 1379985658298.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5174850

>>5174068
>>5174202
>>5174227
>>5174248
>>5174269
>>5174281
>>5174283
>>5174285
>>5174287
>>5174293
>>5174294
>>5174303
>>5174304
>>5174313