/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.5166013]

Search "humor", no results.


/ck/ humor thread.

[Anonymous No.5166025]

[Anonymous No.5166033]

[Anonymous No.5166036]

[Anonymous No.5166406]

[Anonymous No.5166421]

[Anonymous No.5166430]

if anyone has more of this man, please post them. I've only this one and another.

[Anonymous No.5166433]

>>5166430

[Anonymous No.5166440]

>>5166036
>>5166406
>>5166421

so humor to /ck/ is mainly calling people out on their shit.

[Anonymous No.5166442]

>>5166440

[Anonymous No.5166449]

>>5166440
browsing /ck/ is a lot like birdwatching. except instead of birds it's autism and anger

[Anonymous No.5166452]

[Anonymous No.5166456]

anyone got the irish stew, and shepard pie posts?

and the autistic fast food drive thru guy?

[Anonymous No.5166457]

>>5166430

[Anonymous No.5166458]

>>5166452

[Anonymous No.5166460]

[Anonymous No.5166465]

>>5166458

[Anonymous No.5166468]

>>5166465

[Anonymous No.5166470]

>>5166430

That's Old Rambling Guy. I compiled a small list of his posts, but this anon: >>5166457 apparently saved it and beat me to it.

[Anonymous No.5166471]

>>5166468

[Anonymous No.5166474]

>>5166471

[Anonymous No.5166475]

>>5166406

This isn't funny at all. That guy is just flipping his shit over inconsequential stuff and shitposting.

[Anonymous No.5166481]

>>5166475
>This isn't funny at all
>That guy is just flipping his shit over inconsequential stuff and shitposting

[Anonymous No.5166551]

Last time I dumped I got banned but fuck it. I will not post that picture again..

[Anonymous No.5166558]

[Anonymous No.5166563]

[Anonymous No.5166566]

[Anonymous No.5166570]

[Anonymous No.5166573]

>>5166025
is it bad to eat that much garlic? healthwise

[Anonymous No.5166575]

[Anonymous No.5166577]

[Anonymous No.5166582]

[Anonymous No.5166588]

[Anonymous No.5166589]

>>5166582
wat

[Anonymous No.5166591]

>>5166566
What the fuck are they even doing?

>>5166577
I appreciate this kind of humor.

>>5166582
This shit was too funny for the two or three weeks it was big. I knew so many people who were legitimately upset they couldn't tell the difference.

[Anonymous No.5166595]

>>5166589
http://hot-dog-legs.tumblr.com/

>>5166591
What's to be upset about?

[Anonymous No.5166602]

[Anonymous No.5166605]

>>5166595
I don't know. Then again, they were stupid college girls, but they were all like 'I CAN'T TELL TEH DIFFERANCE GUISE'

[Anonymous No.5166607]

>>5166605
This was probably /b/, but whatever.

[Anonymous No.5166606]

[Anonymous No.5166609]

>>5166605
Maybe just upset that their legs looked like hotdogs. I would be.

[Anonymous No.5166613]

>>5166607
Classic

>>5166609
Man, that fucking thread with the werediaper.

[Anonymous No.5166614]

>>5166609
Woooah wrong picture. Sorry guys. Not deleting though.

[Anonymous No.5166615]

>>5166430
Personally, I like to call him rambling man.

[Anonymous No.5166619]

[Anonymous No.5166621]

>>5166573
anyone know?

[Anonymous No.5166622]

[Anonymous No.5166625]

>>5166621
All the time? I would think. Moderation is everything, man.

[Anonymous No.5166626]

[Anonymous No.5166631]

[Anonymous No.5166632]

>>5166625

[Anonymous No.5166634]

[Anonymous No.5166635]

[Anonymous No.5166639]

[Anonymous No.5166646]

>>5166558
that's what life is about

[Anonymous No.5166650]

[Anonymous No.5166653]

>>5166558
I say it every time. I want to see Matt Stonie devour this.

[Anonymous No.5166709]

>>5166563
>back in 2007 in the last year of highschool
>lan party
>shit ton of people there
>bring my PC there with my class mates
>we start playing some random games
>wellthisisboring.jpg
>the internet goes out, only lan works
>this guy from our group of 4 people pulls a toast grill
>where is the bread? where is the butter? where is the ham?
>he just brought the toaster
>have the idea of getting food for the grill
>$3 later, get bread and everything for everyone
>fatass comes by and asks if he can have a toast
>"you buying?"
>"yeah, how much?"
>"$2 a toast?"
>"HELL YEAH"
>decide to sell toast since energy is for free
>ended up making $200 after expenses
>divided by 4 I got $50

I miss those days...

[Anonymous No.5166721]

>>5166606

[Anonymous No.5166730]

>>5166631
Is that a youtube page c. 2006?

[Anonymous No.5166861]

1/4

[Anonymous No.5166868]

>>5166861

[Anonymous No.5166898]

>>5166575
/ck/ horror thread?

[Anonymous No.5166901]

[Anonymous No.5166947]

>>5166901
every time

[Anonymous No.5166953]

>>5166558
>ranch

[Anonymous No.5166962]

>>5166632
Good god, why do those guys over at /v/ post those constipated looking reaction images.

[Anonymous No.5166981]

[Anonymous No.5167246]

>>5166621
garlic is god tier nutritionally. can't go wrong.

[Anonymous No.5167291]

>>5166625
O shit I was the last post in that screenshot. I've actually gotten better at omelettes and using cast iron cookware. Still can't poach a goddamn egg properly, though

[Anonymous No.5167546]

>>5166575

[Anonymous No.5167564]

>>5166558
I plan to live like this when i'm over ~60
just don't give a single fuck and devote every second to sensual pleasure
fuck yes

[Anonymous No.5167576]

>>5167564
It's smarter to do it now, when you're young and your body is resilient. When you're old, eating like that is instant death.

[Anonymous No.5167744]

>>5166709
i wonder who could be behind this toast

[Anonymous No.5167782]

>>5167744
In grade 4 I had a teacher of the Jewish persuasion who told the class that him and his bodies were thinking of making sandbags to sell at a markup to people in a flooded area.

Even at that age I was appalled. I learned the truth at an early age.

[Anonymous No.5167924]

>>5167782
/pol/ is always right.

[Anonymous No.5167936]

>>5167782
>not wanting to make money

do you even capitalism? y'all goyim just mad cuz you poor lel

[Anonymous No.5168054]

>>5167782
I view the act of gouging when people are easily capable of finding a better solution differently than gouging when people are running out of options.

[Anonymous No.5168057]

>>5166025
But crystallized baby ginger is the shit :c

[Anonymous No.5168180]

>>5166605
>read this
>be super fat fuck at 400+ lbs
>have no trouble getting up off the floor
>never understand how if someone as fat as I am can manage, how others who weigh less can't

I mean I can understand the uncle with the bum knee, both my parents (who're in their 60s) would have trouble if they fell, but that story makes even me cringe in disgust.

[Anonymous No.5168193]

[Anonymous No.5168218]

[Anonymous No.5168230]

]>>5166406

This guy's a faggot and he's wrong.

>complains about meatloaf sandwiches
>adding onion garlic and worcester

>multiple flipping equals longer cooking time and drier meat
>tests show that multiple flips equal quicker cooking

[Anonymous No.5168237]

>>5168230
You sure showed that picture.

[Anonymous No.5168243]

>>5168237

lol, i'm against the spreading of misinformation

[Anonymous No.5168288]

>>5166573
Garlic's pretty healthy for you so I doubt it.
Your breath will smell fucking terrible for days though

[Anonymous No.5168314]

>>5166460
That made me lol.

[Anonymous No.5168369]

>>5166566
dat boner

[Anonymous No.5168377]

>>5167576
exactly
i don't want to be fat in days where there is a better quality of life to not being fat, but in my old days it's just going to be a nice way to go out from my pov. only if I have nothing else to live for.

[Anonymous No.5168489]

>>5166575
I remember one time I cracked open a super old cookbook from like the 50's or something, and there were a bunch of recipes like this.

Others included bright red hotdogs in vanilla pudding, some kind of spam-based dessert, and some other weird ass shit.
Does anyone know why that was a thing back then? It's like people just fucking lost their minds or something, I feel like it had something to do with the advent of heavily processed foods and people not knowing where to go with it.

[Anonymous No.5168499]

>>5166614

>rum raisin

[Anonymous No.5168514]

>>5168489

Maybe it was just that age's pretentious trendy hipster bullshit that 99% of people will never actually eat

[Anonymous No.5168555]

>>5168489
The convenience food industry boomed mainly because of WW2. Soldiers needed quick to prepare rations that could keep forever. After the war ended, food companies needed a new market in order to survive, and so they started an all-out marketing offensive aimed at housewives.

[Anonymous No.5168566]

>>5168555
Ah, I figured it might've been something like that, I just didn't even know how to look that up.

Thanks, it's been bugging me ever since I saw that cookbook, and I kept seeing things like that form that decade since then.

[Anonymous No.5168579]

>>5168566
There's a great book about this called 'Something from the Oven: Reinventing Dinner in 1950s America'. Really interesting read with lots of cringeworthy food pics.

[Anonymous No.5168580]

>>5166013
That guy came into my 8am class AGAIN with the 72 oz big gulp from 711 and a package of those fucking frosted mini donuts.
Jesus Christ, he's not even fat either.

[Anonymous No.5168581]

>>5166614

haha, the 3 frozen fleshlights.

Why would you need 3?

[Anonymous No.5168586]

>>5168579
That's actually interesting to look into.

I remember I took a trip to Hawaii once and there was a similar story about how WW2 had an impact on food, but it was mostly just spam becoming a staple.

[Anonymous No.5168612]

>>5168581

They get warm during use so he probably switches them out. Or something.
Why are you wondering about the number of fleshlights, why is he freezing them?

[Anonymous No.5168633]

>>5168581
>>5168612
They're all different inside. Textures and patterns and such.

[Anonymous No.5168639]

>>5168633
Why would you freeze them? I can't imagine fucking snow being fun.

[Anonymous No.5168643]

>>5168633

You can feel the textures?

[Anonymous No.5168645]

>>5168639
necrophilia.

[Anonymous No.5168646]

>>5168581

>ass
>mouth
>vagina

[Anonymous No.5168651]

>>5168646
full force, like the fist of an angry God.

[Anonymous No.5168653]

>>5168639

/co/ has a literal ton of 'Frozen General' thread shitposters who would gladly explain it to you.

[Anonymous No.5168655]

At first glance I thought the glass in the OP image is doner kebab.

[Anonymous No.5168657]

>>5166033

I kinda understand that second one. I usually wait an hour or so after eating before chewing gum or drinking liquids because I can still taste whatever it was I was eating.

[Anonymous No.5168667]

Dinner, /ck/, you?

[Anonymous No.5168671]

>>5168667

[Anonymous No.5168681]

>>5168580

And a Klondike bar.

[Anonymous No.5168694]

>>5168243
I appreciated it, anon.

[Anonymous No.5169343]

>>5166452
>>5166458
>>5166465
>>5166468
>>5166471
>>5166474
Thanks for these, I've been looking for them for a while!

[Anonymous No.5169358]

>>5168580
I used to be this kind of guy
>go to store with friend after class
>get party bag of chips and 1.5-2L soda
>walk home while holding and consuming
>quite skinny
not an every day thing but still lol.

[Anonymous No.5169378]

[Anonymous No.5169456]

>>5166622
>filename

I chuckled.

[Anonymous No.5169632]

Anyone have those images of food on sale with silly names and captions?

[Anonymous No.5169641]

>>5169632

[Anonymous No.5169646]

>>5169641

[Anonymous No.5169648]

>>5169646

[Anonymous No.5169649]

>>5169632
>>5169641
>>5169646
>>5169648
How is this funny?

[Anonymous No.5169650]

>>5169648

[Anonymous No.5169652]

>>5169649
Because it's silly engrish/strange names for foods we know, and also because humor is subjective
>>5169650

[Anonymous No.5169654]

>>5169652
>humor is subjective
Well then your retardation must be objective.

[Anonymous No.5169655]

>>5169652
last one I've got, I don't think there are any more

[Anonymous No.5169657]

>>5169641
thank you /ck/

>>5169649
I have no idea, it's just silly. I like it.

[Anonymous No.5169658]

>>5169654
your mum's puss is my objective lmao

[Anonymous No.5169668]

>>5169652
>soft and wet inside
>pier buddies - good like last time!
>yard meat
>salty pals
>white pips - nature's mistakes
okay, these got me

[Anonymous No.5169782]

>>5169641

Oh my god those always crack me up

[Anonymous No.5169789]

anybody have the gif of the hot dog eating contest where the guy pukes and the dude next to him sees it and starts puking?

[Anonymous No.5169842]

>>5169789
no but I have this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4O_px0hW7Ds

[Anonymous No.5169848]

>>5169842
>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4O_px0hW7Ds

i just

i don't

what

[Anonymous No.5169853]

>>5168667
I really like those Cheetos Mix-Ups.

[Anonymous No.5169860]

>>5169842
Oh god this is wonderful.

[Anonymous No.5169865]

>>5169648
>Pork Bro$nan$

[Anonymous No.5169913]

>Anonymous 02/04/14(Tue)21:56 UTC No.5166421
>Replies: >>5166440
>File: 1391551013504.jpg-(51 KB, 805x200, facts opinions.jpg)
>51 KB
A girl I now literally did that exact thing at formal last night...

[Anonymous No.5169922]

>>5166622
A girl I know literally did that exact thing last night at formal hall.

[Anonymous No.5169925]

>>5169842
He swallows so many, and yet so few ever come back up.

[Anonymous No.5169927]

>>5169842
>I'm jus sayin

I was born so that I could view this video. It's all downhill from here, I'm sure.

[Anonymous No.5169937]

>>5169378

This one always gets me.

[Anonymous No.5169977]

>>5166465
These are fuckin hilarious.

[Anonymous No.5169980]

>>5166563
That kid is alpha as fuck

[Anonymous No.5169983]

>>5166570
o I am laffin

[Anonymous No.5169986]

>>5166605
WHATS THE VIDEO

fuckin making me type that shot out

[Anonymous No.5170019]

>>5169986
It was circus music.

[Anonymous No.5170028]

>>5166632
Lmao

[Anonymous No.5170032]

>>5166406
that guy's recipe has to be a ruse.
HOW TO MAKE BURGER: spread out your meat, baby. Don't be rough with it and mash it in to goo, just break it up and increase the surface area. Evenly distribute a good amount of salt, some black pepper, and maybe a little powdered chili (no, not fucking chili powder in a plastic jar, an actual powdered chili, like ancho or something) if you want. mix as lightly as humanly possible, like tossing it with the end of a fork. This is the most vital part of a hamburger - keeping the meat texture intact. press in to thin patties, that guy was right about nobody liking burger balls. Dry and salt and pepper the outside a bit more. If it won't stick maybe rub in a tiny bit of olive oil i dunno i'm not a scientist. Then put it on an already fully heated and lightly oiled (with vegetable oil, dipshit) cast iron frying pan on high heat, and flip it over when the cooked color creeps a little more than halfway up the side of the burger, if it's hot enough it should be well seared. Then when the other side is equally well seared, it's done. If it's not done in the middle you're a fuck up, congrats.
ROCKET SCIENCE

[Anonymous No.5170123]

>>5166036
fucken rekd

[Anonymous No.5170125]

>>5166566
>white people

[Anonymous No.5170319]

[Anonymous No.5170324]

[Anonymous No.5170424]

>>5168646
I like how you listed them in preferential order

[Anonymous No.5170441]

>>5166613
The last part made me lose my shit.

[Anonymous No.5170511]

>>5170324
oh christ i can't explain how hard i am laughing
+1

[AntacidCanada !!bxgf5+DXvbZ No.5170577]

>>5166625
Man. Fuck I remember that thread.

>>5166901
Every fucking time.

Ok OP. Lucky for you I organized my /ck/ humor thread a week ago. I'm dumping and I hope I don't repost!

[Anonymous No.5170581]

[Anonymous No.5170585]

[Anonymous No.5170588]

>>5170581
>that fucking food pyramid
no wonder the last few generations have gotten so fucking fat.

[Anonymous No.5170590]

The Milksteak.

Probably outdated.

[Anonymous No.5170596]

>>5170585
I just realized, That's the original /ck/ challenge logo in the top right corner.

[Anonymous No.5170598]

This is recent as well.

Its certainly not funny, but relevant.

[Anonymous No.5170603]

This is a good one. Save it for friday nights. Thats when /ck/ has good humor.

[Anonymous No.5170604]

anybody remember quinkey sauce or whatever it was called?

[Anonymous No.5170608]

[Anonymous No.5170611]

[Anonymous No.5170616]

gold

[Anonymous No.5170620]

2012 Christmas card. Anybody got a 2013? I wouldn't be surprised if we didn't.

[Anonymous No.5170623]

[Anonymous No.5170628]

Yeah, this one. This is the original /ck/ challenge logo.

RIPIP heartsonfire. We still remember ;_;7

[Anonymous No.5170634]

[Anonymous No.5170635]

>>5170628
>heartsonfire
That triggered me, shitlord

[Anonymous No.5170636]

[Anonymous No.5170637]

>>5170620
>pink Himalayan salt
>irish stew
>masaokis
>faggotoni

There's plenty more.

[Anonymous No.5170640]

[Anonymous No.5170641]

>>5170603
wtf is this?

[Anonymous No.5170642]

>>5170637
Irish stew will come up soon. Are you sure that wasn't last year? Its 2014 you know :3c

[Anonymous No.5170644]

>>5170641
rolling.

[Anonymous No.5170648]

[Anonymous No.5170653]

[Anonymous No.5170655]

Quick backstory. I didn't get to see this thread firsthand, but this guy sodastreamed his soup. I was told that he thought it was awful.

[Anonymous No.5170657]

[Anonymous No.5170661]

[Anonymous No.5170662]

>>5170657
>literal neckbeard
Why do people do this?

[Anonymous No.5170664]

1,000,000 autism bu

[Anonymous No.5170667]

>>5170661
Move that from your /ck/ folder to your /g/ folder where it belongs.

[Anonymous No.5170668]

>>5170662
By not giving a fuck anymore...

[Anonymous No.5170669]

>>5170664
*autism bux for anybody who could provide the link thats assosciated with that.

[Anonymous No.5170673]

>>5170668
But he still shaved around it?

[Anonymous No.5170676]

Technically /h/ humor. I just really enjoy this.

[Anonymous No.5170680]

Ok, next we move to thread captures.

[Anonymous No.5170686]

It looks like these include captures from awful roommate threads.

[Anonymous No.5170693]

1/4 from somethingawful if i recall correctly.

If you don't want to read, I recommend saving these 4 and reading them later at least.

[Anonymous No.5170697]

>>5168489
Highly processed convenience foods like soup mix and instant pudding were considered real and wonderful at the time. This was an age where every woman was expected to cook 2 to 3 meals a day no exceptions, along with dessert and drinks.

[Anonymous No.5170698]

2/4

[Anonymous No.5170700]

3/4

[Anonymous No.5170701]

4/4

[Anonymous No.5170705]

[Anonymous No.5170707]

[Anonymous No.5170708]

Don't worry. There are some that aren't wall of text. They'll be here soon.

[Anonymous No.5170711]

Quite possibly a forced may-may. Only seen it once in a 4cc thread.

[Anonymous No.5170712]

>>5169654
Basically the phrasing evokes feelings of corporate artificiality and nostalgia mixed with silly words. It's like a grocery store but on another planet. It's highly subjective which parts you would find the funniest but there is a broad strategy behind the phrasing.

They are from liartownusa which is, broadly, a parody website that makes funny things that look like magazines, movie posters, book covers etc. in the style of various decades.

[Anonymous No.5170713]

I decided to skip the "please refrain from posting california rolls" image. I think I saw it here last week.

[Anonymous No.5170717]

This actually used to be a worse problem then it is now.

[Anonymous No.5170720]

[Anonymous No.5170724]

This one makes me happy :3

[Anonymous No.5170729]

This is REEEEEAAAALLLY old.

[Anonymous No.5170730]

[Anonymous No.5170733]

[Anonymous No.5170737]

I actually have a request. I do not have a picture of Natural Recipes. The Semen cookbook.

[Anonymous No.5170740]

Natural Harvest I think is the actual title.

[Anonymous No.5170742]

<==4cc player.

[Anonymous No.5170744]

>>5170729

Boy, how things haven't changed.

[Anonymous No.5170745]

[Anonymous No.5170748]

Probably more /v/ humor as well.

Gordon Ramsay is also a 4cc player.

[Anonymous No.5170750]

HERE IT IS IRISH STEW.

I only have two threads from that guy. I believe there is indeed a third out there somewhere.

[Anonymous No.5170752]

[Anonymous No.5170751]

>>5170669
>soylent inventor
>google search engine

[Anonymous No.5170755]

[Anonymous No.5170758]

>>5166613
I believe this image was in that thread.

[Anonymous No.5170760]

[Anonymous No.5170765]

[Anonymous No.5170767]

[Anonymous No.5170768]

Cock Breaking Ground Recipie by X
HOORAH!

[Anonymous No.5170770]

[Anonymous No.5170773]

[Anonymous No.5170775]

This anon still lurks. He stopped by and left a comment in the last humor thread.

[Anonymous No.5170776]

>>5166460

Oh god did I have a good laugh. Thank you.

[Anonymous No.5170779]

lets see which of these haven't been posted yet.

[Anonymous No.5170780]

>>5170775

Love this thread, thanks OP.

[Anonymous No.5170782]

[Anonymous No.5170784]

>>5170779
>five stars on amazon

[Anonymous No.5170786]

posting /ck/ related reaction faces that people should have in their arsenal.

[Anonymous No.5170791]

>>5170780
I'm not OP but you're welcome :3
(watch the 4cc pls)

[Anonymous No.5170796]

[Anonymous No.5170797]

Is that a mushroom?

[Anonymous No.5170798]

[Anonymous No.5170800]

>>5170797
Looks like a pie with a sossage in it, innit

[Anonymous No.5170804]

Gather round lads, and here the story of when moot came asking for advice about where he could put pots and pans.

Sadly, /ck/ didn't have enough new york fags to join the cooking club he tried to start. I would have jumped at the chance.

[Anonymous No.5170807]

[Anonymous No.5170809]

>>5170800
Everything looks like anus to britfags such as you.

[Anonymous No.5170811]

A solution was finally worked out.

[Anonymous No.5170812]

>>5169456
I weep for our species.

[Anonymous No.5170814]

>>5170804
It's not that, I'm from NY and NYC, I just don't care... get over yourself, as moot should do.

[AntacidCanada !!bxgf5+DXvbZ No.5170819]

Thats all I got gents. I'm saving the board-tans for Valentine's day.

Ha! Funny story about valentines day! There's a certain divegrass tournament that starts that day and /ck/ will play /wg/. Isn't that a funny coincidence?

[Anonymous No.5170824]

>>5170819
Have you changed the ugly green uniforms yet?

[Anonymous No.5170835]

>>5170824
Sadly no. Aesthetics have kinda taken a backseat. Could you give me a concept to go off of? I'd rather have something board relevant than just a soccer uniform.

(this isn't a cup thread so email me)

[Anonymous No.5170849]

>>5170740
Uh.... that's neither uncommon or funny, I've done this too and so have several people that I know.

[Anonymous No.5170855]

>>5169668
vinegar husbands are the best
>dat dildo joke

[Anonymous No.5170858]

>>5169842
i dont know what happened but i think i have reached enlightenment

[Anonymous No.5170871]

>>5169842
I...my sides...

[Anonymous No.5170894]

>>5170628
They were before my time on /ck/, but I saw a post possibly claiming they were still alive. Is there any truth to it?

[Anonymous No.5170895]

>>5170705
>tfw I pulled a /fit/ wife 200 pounds lighter than I am

[Anonymous No.5170898]

>>5170729
Is this real?

[Anonymous No.5170899]

>>5170676
reminded me of this

[Anonymous No.5170921]

>>5170767
my FUCKING SIDES

[Anonymous No.5170974]

>>5166465

Completely lost my shit on this one. Bravo.

[Anonymous No.5170989]

>>5170590
>back in my teens
>be invited over to stay at friends house for a night of gaming general fucking around
>hear we are having steak for dinner
>think of a nice grilled steak and baked potato
>thisgunbegood
>DINNERS READY
>see a casserole dish full of creamy white and a pot of undercooked mashed potatoes
>they stab into the white goop with a fork and pull out a gristly "steak" and plop it on top of some of the potatoes and hand it to me
>don't want to be a dick so I try it
>first bite is pretty bad, overcooked and tasted fucking awful
>second bit was full gristle, they hear it crunch as i bit into it and they look at me half a dozen times as i try to pick it out of my teeth
>you don't have to eat it if you don't want to
>man up and finish that shit sans a few pieces that would have requires sheers to get through
>friend barely touches their
>they give me the last drumstick ice-cream
>friend bitches
>WELL AT LEAST THEY TRIED TO FINISH IT

[Anonymous No.5170990]

>>5170767
that fucking drink too ahaha
electrolyte syrup can be used for diarrhoea treatment coincidentally
stay classy /ck/

[Anonymous No.5170991]

>>5170819
>reminded that I'm about to spend another valentine's day alone
>no bf to playfully cook breakfast with

[Anonymous No.5170995]

>>5170991
How much ranch dressing do you eat?

[Anonymous No.5171005]

>>5170995
uh, none

[Anonymous No.5171016]

>>5170991

btw im a girl

[Anonymous No.5171060]

>>5170760
>voluptuous male lunchables angel
To the /y/ drawthread!

[Anonymous No.5171107]

>>5170717

I remember how HEATED /sp/ and /ck/ used to get over amerifat vs yuropoor threads.

they were quite entertaining though

[Anonymous No.5171163]

>>5170644
lol was that a real promotion?

[Anonymous No.5171187]

>>5170750
so we are supposed to laugh at how autistic the OP is, right?

[Anonymous No.5171195]

>>5171187
>he doesn't get it
You may be legitimately autistic

[Anonymous No.5171246]

>>5170590

[Anonymous No.5171271]

[Anonymous No.5171277]

[Anonymous No.5171281]

>>5170740

You can even buy those calenders

[Anonymous No.5171287]

[Anonymous No.5171292]

[Anonymous No.5171304]

[Anonymous No.5171309]

[Anonymous No.5171315]

>>5166033
This thread derailed about how cute the cat picture in OP was. That was actually funnier than the little snippet you posted.

[Anonymous No.5171326]

>>5166639
Someone did save it, I lol'ed. Poor OP.

[Anonymous No.5171403]

>>5169842
i fucking lost it oh my god

[Anonymous No.5171563]

>>5170662
Crippling depression, I don't even eat or drink some days because I cant get enough energy to do so.

[Anonymous No.5171566]

>>5171563
Are you on any meds?

[Anonymous No.5171576]

>>5170662
that's a chinstrap.
neckbeards are, y'know, on the neck.

[Anonymous No.5171632]

>>5166730
its finnish site called irc-galleria.

[Pyradacor !!vgG2wPiqlLE No.5171635]

>>5170752
that fucking thread

[Anonymous No.5171636]

>>5166573
too much garlic and your sweat, your breath, fuck, your whole being will smell horribly,
but that's pretty much it.

[Anonymous No.5171721]

>>5169789
I'm late but I got it aaaaand image limit reached

[Anonymous No.5171850]

>>5171635
that fucking filter

[Anonymous No.5171852]

Just woke up.
>>5170628
Yeah, I'm John. I miss heartsonfire too.

>>5170653
I remember this thread. It was pure magic. Was it archived somewhere?

[Anonymous No.5171891]

Anyone have a screenshot of the thread where a guy put motor oil in his roommate's bread? I remember the other guy in the thread saying he put poison ivy in his roommate's weed and put him in the hospital for a month.

Or the thread about blind baking?

[Anonymous No.5171908]

>>5171891
It's gonna have to go in a new thread, since we've already hit the image limit.

[Anonymous No.5171947]

>>5170740
I'm the guy who scanned the book. You can torrent it, it's a good prank to invite your friends around a recipe and leave the book open on this page (since it's only basic recipes, only with cum).
I'll dump it in another thread in a few hours and link it here, I have to go right now.

[Anonymous No.5172226]

>>5169649
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Non_sequitur_%28literary_device%29

l2humor

[Anonymous No.5172274]

>>5172226
You realize a non sequitur can be bad right?

[Anonymous No.5172291]

>>5172274
Potato

[Anonymous No.5172367]

>>5169649
Dude, these three pictures gave me the most enjoyment out of all the pictures in this thread :)

Greetings from Sweden

[Anonymous No.5172875]

>>5168230
Multiple flips don't equate to quicker cooking.

[Anonymous No.5173366]

Copypastas incoming.

TGI Fridays.
Let me tell you something about TGI Fridays.
TGI Fridays is a bleak and horrid place, where flavor and sanity go to die. The glazed eyes of plastic taxidermy heads looking down upon you through their blue blocker sunglasses as if to chant "memento Mori." With each horrid, unfeeling gaze. The waiters are but shells of what once may have been called men, driven to giggling lunacy, with grins plastered across their eerily waxy faces. Should the mention of a birth date even be mentioned in passing, they will descend upon you like a pack of wild jackals, clapping and chanting like the participants in some mad ritual for a god too foul to conceive.

Beware, my son, any restauraunt bearing the T.G.I, flee as far as you can, seek refuge in any other eatery, but let not the fridays take you, for there is a death, my son, a death not of the body, but of the soul.
A death I would not wish upon my worst enemy.

[Anonymous No.5173375]

>I've made this every christmas for the last 3 years.
And I bet your pleb family congratulates you on your ability to mix premade processed foods together.

I saw your pick and laughed out loud. Then I thought about fat pigs grubbing for leftovers on the dirty shag carpet and ended up puking on my dick, getting a weird boner, and letting it dry as a crust on my penis.

I plan on not showering and going to work like this in the morning. I'm sure no one will smell it and even if they do they won't think it is me or dare to ask. I'll be hard and horny throughout the day, just thinking about this puke crust on my dick. Maybe I'll go into one of the stalls and pull on off real quick when I have a few minutes alone.

I've gone to work with a huge carrot in my ass before. I carefully washed and peeled it and then used a paring knife to carve it into a properly tapered shape that filled me up but also allowed my o-ring to close over it and prevent it from getting lost.

It's really not a big deal. As long as you make sure to clean and peel the surfaces you don't really have to worry.

[Anonymous No.5173379]

One of the posts of Fatty McAutism:

While I should feel flattered that so many people remember the terrible things that have happened to me, I am still a human being and have feelings. I know the anonymity of this world can make people forget this, but it is true nevertheless.

No, I do not have a girlfriend. Would I want a girlfriend? Of course. The last time I was with a girl was in grade 11 and the last kiss I had was at a work event. I am sure everyone on this planet feels lonely and companionship is what everyone seeks.

I understand that I am somewhat socially eccentric and have some social anxieties, but I do not think it exceeds the norm and should not be entailed to ridicule, loneliness, and pain because of this.

I am quiet, polite, empathetic, and a great listener. I am not sure why I am always subjected to such painful experiences when all I want to do is eat a meal at a fast food restaurant. I suppose the frequency suggests it is something on my part, but I cannot fathom why. I am always polite and professional, I do not want to be subjected to embarrassing small talk or questioned about my habits. Who does?

For example, last night I went to Wendy's (which is somewhat far from my home) and got a spicy chicken combo with a junior bacon cheeseburger on the side. When I was at the window to pay, the worker asked if I, "wanted to donate $2 to the Dave Thomas foundation". He saw that I was apprehensive and not answer right away and asked me not once but three times. Why would someone think it is appropriate to ask someone about a donation three times? Is my silence not answer enough?

I ended up shaking my head and that was that. Until I was eating in the parking lot and saw my receipt and he had charged me for the charity donation.

Why do people do this? Is this something that happens to everyone, only I am more sensitive and let it get to me? If so, how can people go through life without worrying about others doing these things to them?

[Anonymous No.5173380]

I went to McDonald's today and got a Filet-O-Fish combo with a bacon cheeseburger on the side. I was eating it in my vehicle in the parking lot and listening to an audio book when I glanced up and saw the McDonald's worker I ordered outside having a cigarette.

She waved at me and I nodded and had to wait 7 minutes before she went back inside and I could eat in comfort again. I don't think that employees should be bothering or even trying to socialize with customers outside of the McDonald's restaurant or drive through, but that is another story.

I went to McDonald's for dinner tonight and got a McChicken combo with a bacon cheeseburger on the side. As I was driving to the second window the same girl was still working. She was acting somewhat obsequious and attempting small talk when she asked, 'why don't you come eat inside instead of in the parking lot where it is cold'.

That really bothered me for many reasons. First of all, I don't want my routine or actions to be tracked by a fast food employee. Secondly, she should not try to tell me how I should live my life. I do not want to eat inside because I find it less comfortable and would much rather be inside my vehicle listening to an audiobook and enjoying myself and my privacy.

Overall, I think it was very unprofessional to bring this up. I should have a clean slate with each drive through visit, not have to get the third degree because I committed some sort of faux pas. Which I don't think I did, because I often see people eating in fast food parking lots. How does she know I am not busy going to work or somewhere in a rush?
Another Fatty McAutism post.

How do you feel about eating in your vehicle in the parking lot of a fast food restaurant versus eating inside the restaurant?

[Anonymous No.5173384]

A nigger, a Jew and a grossly obese Mexican man walk into a gay bar. They approach a faggot with a 2-inch long, always-flaccid penis using a laptop at a table.

"You wanna come back to our place?" the nigger asks the faggot. "You can toss my Mexican friend's rancid herpes-and-shit-covered salad and jerk my Jewish friend's wart-and-pimple-covered penis while I ram my giant unlubed nigger-cock into your gaping oft-fucked asshole."

"Literally nothing in the world would make me happier," says the faggot. "But first I need to start a ramen thread on /ck/. It will just take a moment."

[Anonymous No.5173387]

>>5173375

>I saw your pick

short for picture?

Retard.

[Anonymous No.5173388]

>>5171908
You have it? Shit man, post a new thread for that one. I'd love to see it.

[Anonymous No.5173404]

>>5173388
>>5171908
This is also relevant to my interests. Please post pls.

[Anonymous No.5173413]

>>5166650
what's going on in this picture

[Anonymous No.5173418]

>>5168667
I like your rocks

[Anonymous No.5173474]

>>5170899
Holy crap is he breaking her spine in the OG format?

Metal.

[Anonymous No.5175370]

>tfw no Quebecois couple

[Anonymous No.5175493]

>vinegar husbands

holy shit, that's too much. I'm out.