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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

File: 322 KB, 800x640, FlippingThePasta.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

kitchen tricks to impress Anonymous Mon Jan 27 15:54:02 2014 No.5142188 [Reply] [Original]

Pic not related - that two handed stuff looks weak.

I like giving a couple quick one handed flips while reaching for a beer - chicks melt

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 15:56:01 2014 No.5142195 Wait untill you get 18... chicks DIG adults!

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 15:57:01 2014 No.5142197 >>5142188 cutting without looking, like ramsay does is cool too large flames from grease or alcohol are impressive

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 15:57:01 2014 No.5142198 wow, so chef, just like tv I find that making my food taste really good is the best kitchen trick.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:00:01 2014 No.5142202 tfw: you get the perfect balance of dark chocolate and ruffies at the end of a great meal and she doesn't even know what hit her.

Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:06:01 2014 No.5142220

>>5142195
>>5142198

Seriously? Never?

I dig it when I catch a chick's eyes across her chardonnay while I'm laughing at some well timed joke and mincing an onion, my fingertips a hairsbreadth away from danger if not for my modified claw. She's into me and my cool tricks.

I suppose it is better when the food tastes good. First she just want to fool around, but after the meal she wants my babies.

Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:08:02 2014 No.5142225

>>5142197

Right? Flames are good.

I remember a Cosby Show (38 here) where Dr Huxtable kept all these covered pots of water boiling and one saucepan of jarred tomato sauce. He'd lift the covers and throw spices in and do his Jello Pudding Pop face and you know he was getting a piece of Mrs. H that night. And it's WAY harder to get a piece with your own wife.

>>	Japanese Lettuce Hardcore !!hGVNqbTL1ZV Mon Jan 27 16:13:01 2014 No.5142239 >>5142197 dangerous as fuck son

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:15:01 2014 No.5142247 >>5142220 >I dig it when I catch a chick's eyes >dig it >chick Are you a time traveler from some decade that should've been left buried?

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:16:01 2014 No.5142253 >>5142197 >large flames from grease or alcohol are impressive >large flames from grease >starting a grease fire to impress women

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:21:01 2014 No.5142266 >>5142253 Don't worry, my sink isn't too far from where I cook just in case something goes wrong.

>>	Jimmy Mon Jan 27 16:25:01 2014 No.5142283 >>5142266 Oh, you're trolling. I thought you were serious this entire thread! 6/10 mate.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:25:01 2014 No.5142280 >>5142253 bitches love burning houses it always gets em... Hot

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:26:01 2014 No.5142288 >>5142266 Water + kitchen fire? I bet you make crystals out of ammonia and bleach too.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:43:01 2014 No.5142330 File: 22 KB, 400x291, Simpsons Steamed Hams.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>5142188 >Ho ho ho, trying to impress them with pan tossing. What the ladies dig is recipes with style and class.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:44:01 2014 No.5142331 >>5142253 This one got me chuckling. >>5142280 This one got it to a strong laugh. >>5142288 Was actually out of breath. Sides actually hurt. but, I am high. So..

Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:45:01 2014 No.5142335

>>5142280

My house is concrete and tin roof, so don't worry.

And I wasn't being serious, I think cooking good food, for example a home made pasta from egg and flour with a real tomato sauce is impressive to the layperson but just mmeh to a half decent cook (If I may yank my own chain), but he said he wanted ideas for cool things to do so I suggested fire and disregard for safety, maybe he'll get them both at the same time and drop the pan grease on his abercrombie hoodie. I don't give a fuck.

Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:48:01 2014 No.5142345

>>5142330
From the either unaware anons or the anons who haven't been able to impress the ladies in the kitchen (whether or not you can do it at the table I guess doesn't matter), you are either doing something wrong, are horribly bad looking, have the personality of the wet dishtowel you keep using by mistake to take something out of the oven (Shit! That's hot! (Teehee, that chef keeps doing that!)), or the ladies around you have been around to many awesome chefs like me.

Or, it's something else.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:49:01 2014 No.5142350 >>5142188 Making banana faster with the flames is an insta panty dropper.

Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:50:01 2014 No.5142351

>>5142335
I guess I'm waaayyy off on my thinking. I'd say most ladies a couple drinks in, around the counter, would be oohing and aahing if you mounded up some flour, made a well, and dropped an egg in. Sure, any read deal cook wouldn't be "impressed," but almost everyone would think it was totally fancy. Am I that wrong?

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:52:02 2014 No.5142357 >>5142350 Yes. And winking and eye and muttering "insta panty dropper" to your buddy while you do it is boss.

Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:54:01 2014 No.5142365

>>5142351
This. Pretty much, as long as it looks like you know what you're doing, you're on the right track. It's all about the confidence, whether it's in life or cooking.

That being said, a man who can tame fire AND cook good shit with said fire gets those panties dropping faster.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:56:01 2014 No.5142373 >>5142357 >implying I just don't have a panty fetish where i have to take them off when preparing food In all reality, after a nice date night, and half drunk, it's a show that could get you lucky. Worked for my while when we dated like six years ago.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 16:57:01 2014 No.5142378 >>5142351 No, that's what I think too, and for example my ahjm.. girlfriend is jealous if I cook for other women. But you won't deny the beauty of a nice flambé. The grease fire or chopping your fingers off was just me being an asshole.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 17:00:01 2014 No.5142385 >>5142365 >>5142373 >>5142378 Okay. Back on track again. Toasting any sort of spices. Even sesame seeds. Except when the pepper vapors start hitting throats and all the guests start hacking.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 17:01:01 2014 No.5142388 >>5142345 I bet they were mighty impressed by your autism >in b4 tips fedora

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 17:01:01 2014 No.5142392 >>5142247 haha, the guys a fucken rookie anyway >She's into me and my cool tricks >She's into me and my cool tricks >She's into me and my cool tricks >She's into me and my cool tricks I lol'd heartily, this thread is ridiculous

Anonymous Mon Jan 27 17:07:54 2014 No.5142405

>>5142385
Oh, and forgot to add, if you have a good sweets recipe, especially a chocolate recipe under your sleeve... it can be anything from your saving grace to a clincher.

I used to make this dark chocolate marquise-mousse tart thing with macerated cherries. The game's over after that.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 17:12:53 2014 No.5142422 How do I toss with a cast iron pan?

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 17:14:54 2014 No.5142432 >>5142422 you need to practice your alone time activities to bulk up your forearms.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 17:14:54 2014 No.5142433 >>5142422 Get stronger forearms. Or get a smaller cast iron.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 17:14:54 2014 No.5142434 >>5142422 Not gonna happen, assuming you mean a regular old cast iron pan, like a skillet. We've got a cast iron pan that's more like a crepe pan, and you can toss with that. You need a lip, essentially, and no corners.

Anonymous Mon Jan 27 17:17:53 2014 No.5142441

>>5142405

Of course. Nice.

I suppose pulling out a torch for the creme brulees would work.

Oh, shit, and the one that you'd never think would work is the steel. It's tricky because you almost MUST be talking to someone while you use it. Otherwise some wiseguy tries to undercut you and score your women.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 17:38:39 2014 No.5142500 >>5142202 This. Dark chocolate hides the bitter taste of crushed benzos perfectly. You can hide up to 10mg of xanax in just a couple of ounces of dark chocolate Pot de creme.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 20:37:50 2014 No.5142931 >>5142188 I've always wondered if I could pull off pizza tossing. Almost seems too douchey.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 20:55:21 2014 No.5143007 >>5142931 I tried it once in a dorm kitchen with some other people around. I was actually pulling it off but I stopped because I felt like a douche.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 21:37:38 2014 No.5143141 >>5143007 I knew it.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 21:39:24 2014 No.5143150 >>5142220 >my fingertips a hairsbreadth away from danger if not for my modified claw What the fuck, you have a claw?

Anonymous Mon Jan 27 21:49:25 2014 No.5143198

>>5143150

I think he's referring to Gordon Ramsey's onion-cutting video where he tells you to hold it in this position that makes your hand kind of like a claw. You brace the flat of the knife against a certain part of your finger to keep it from cutting you or some shit.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 22:23:25 2014 No.5143326 >>5143198 http://www.eastpennsd.org/teacherpages/bealann/downloads/Dicing%20tips.pdf

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 22:28:25 2014 No.5143341 >>5143150 >>5143198 no mang, he actually has a specially modified claw to chop onions with, like Captn hook that could change his hook to a fork or a cigar holder.

>>	Anonymous Mon Jan 27 23:29:30 2014 No.5143462 >>5143198 I'm thinking that this is him. http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/video/chef-eduardo-garcia-bionic-hand-stop-21338603

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