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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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4584916 No.4584916 [Reply] [Original]

i just handled my balls after handling jalapenos

:(

>> No.4584937

>>4584916
I once cut up some peppers and, sensing sex was in the near future, went to clean my butt crack and crotch.
Not fun.

>> No.4584939

>>4584937
>butt crack and crotch
Nigga you gay.

>> No.4584943

>>4584939
Smelly ass is not a turn on. I sweat a lot.

>> No.4584946

Making Pico de galo

cut up jalapenos
all good
cut up onions
start crying
rub eyes with jalapenoey hands
tears everywhere
profanity for days

>> No.4584947

>>4584937
my ex used to get sooo mad cuase i wouldnt wash my hands pre-sex post-cooking. and i would put jalapenos in allll my food

>> No.4584951

>mincing bird's eye chillies
>inside of nose itches
>scratch
>oh god it burns
>tears
>automatically wipe them away
>oh god my eyes
at least the pain in my eye made me forget about the pain in my nose

>> No.4584972

>>4584943
You are a rare breed to care about that sort of thing. Thank you.

>> No.4587111

Cut up habanero for chili con carne.
Learn the location of every crack in the skin of my hands.

>> No.4587185

>get friend to try dave's ultimate insanity "hot sauce" on end of toothpick
>tell him to be careful of sauce gunk on side of bottle and to wash hands after
>disregards warning and trots off to use restroom
>comes back out nearly in tears and saying he might have to go to ER because his dick is on fire.

>> No.4587196
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4587196

>making a delicious curry
>finely slicing up some little red chilly peppers because i like it hot
>while everything's cooking decide to put myself into relax mode
>go to bathroom wash hands
>take out contact lenses
>IT FUCKING BURNS WITH THE MIGHT OF AN EXPLODING SUN
>EVEN THOUGH I WASHED MY HANDS IT BURNS
>can't even open eye, tears pouring out profusely
>oh god i still have to deal with the other eye
>decide to just throw out the pair of contacts because scared
>chilly peppers and contacts, never again.

From that day i learned my lesson; if i'm handling any kind of hot pepper i take my contacts out first.

>> No.4587237 [DELETED] 

>eating sushi while out with boyfriend
>return home hours later
>"hey anon, lets get sexy"
>start with a blow job
>"anon, something hurts!"
>rush boyfriend to hospital
>boyfriend looses the top layer of skin on his penor
>"I still love you anon!"

>> No.4587243

>eating sushi while out with boyfriend
>return home hours later
>"hey anon, lets get sexy"
>start with a blow job
>"anon, something hurts!"
>rush boyfriend to hospital
>boyfriend has a severe fish allergy
>boyfriend looses the top layer of skin on his penor
>"I still love you anon!"

>> No.4587248

>>4587243
>fish allergy
How does shit like this even happen?

>> No.4587275

>>4587248
He watched me eat the sushi (he had something else obviously). He asked for the suckie-suckie. I guess he didn't think he would have a reaction. But it worked out ok. That happened at the beginning of our relationship. We dated for five years, and we've been married for five years.

>> No.4587279

>>4587275
Stories you can tell the grandkids

>> No.4587290
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4587290

>>4587275
>>4587243
Holy shit, you're living in a romcom.

>> No.4587306

>>4587275
Did he like... permanently lose the top layer? Like a burn wound or something? Or did it grow back?

>> No.4587368

>>4587306
It grew back. I don't really know what it looked like right afterwards, he wouldn't let me see it when he was recovering. I guess it made him feel...vulnerable, and he just didn't want to show it to me.

>> No.4587382

>>4587275
>asked for the suckie-suckie
I lol'd

>> No.4587590

>>4587279
she swallows the grandkids

>> No.4587601
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4587601

>not wearing disposable rubber gloves when handling large amounts of chilis

Get on my level, plebs.

>> No.4587605

>hfw you finger her after cutting up jalapenos

>> No.4587629

When I was a kid we used to grow and then string red chilies ( using needle and thread) and let them dry for use in winter.( not tex-mex, rural appalachia). I remember at age 7 rubbing my eyes afterwards. You only do that once. Only thing comparable was having poison ivy on my balls and being told by a cousin that acetone ( nail polish remover) really helped the itch.

>> No.4587634

>>4587629
What does acetone do to chili burns?

>> No.4587661

>>4587601
>Work in a lab
>Free boxes of disposable sterile gloves

Preparing meat has never been so easy.

>> No.4587853

>>4587590
>She

>> No.4588236

>>4587853
Yes, she.

>> No.4588278

Pour a glass of milk and submerge your junk in it for several minutes until that burn subsides

>> No.4588294

>Cut up serranos and jalepenos every week for delicious omelettes and such.
>nogloves.jpg
>always fap afterwards
Oh
>2013
>giving a fuck

If you can't fap with a little fire you aren't a real man. Regardless don't fap with bengay, thats just silly.

>> No.4588311

>>4587634
All I can think, is it readily evaporates and makes them cold

Ice or rubbing alcohol would achieve the same effects

>> No.4588345

>>4588294
what does bengay do

>> No.4588371
File: 161 KB, 1024x576, eli-thompson-boardwalk_empire.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
4588371

>>4588294
>>4588345
>tfw they use mouthwash before blowing u

>> No.4588400

>>4588371
but what would bengay do

i have some right now