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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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4241736 No.4241736[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

What the fuck /ck/?

How the fuck is anyone supposed to eat this disgusting shit?

I'm trying to eat healthy and all, but mymouth straight up rejects this crap.

What do?

>> No.4241742

>>4241736
Kale is disgusting to you? What in all perfect hell?

Cut off the heads, cut those into chip-sized pieces, rub those bastards with olive oil, slap them on a pan, sprinkle on a LITTLE BIT of seasalt, bake at 350 F for 8-11 minutes and you have delicious kale chips.

>> No.4241745
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4241745

>>4241736
Kale is pretty tasty.
Man up and eat your veggies

>> No.4241748

Honestly I just like the stuff raw. But then I'm much more hardcore than you are. I would suggest sautéing a chiffonade of kale with butter and lemon or onion and bacon. You can also use it as a salad green, but you're probably too much of a wuss.

>> No.4241752

>>4241745
>>4241742

Wtf. R u People serious?

I feel like im on a candid camera show or something.

>> No.4241755

cook it longer, use salt. use broth. add beans, sausage, onions, garlic, and black pepper for a good soup. otherwise sautee in olive oil and add garlic towards the end. if you don't like either of those then you probably just don't like eating kale. if you really want the broscience instead of eating other things, invest in an expensive juicer.

>> No.4241757

stop buying it. why eat something you don't like

>> No.4241761

>>4241752
no human can troll this hard. I thought /ck/ scared away the retards of 4chan.

>> No.4241762

Kale is fucking good with everything. Eat it raw, put it in soups, put it in salads, put it in the oven and make kale chips, garnish your steaks with it.

Kale > your shit

>> No.4241763

>>4241752
Its a little bitter, but its not that bad. Its subtle.

Grow some stones and eat your hipster cabbage

>> No.4241767

>>4241762

I'll have to try it cooked into something. Eating it raw is a nonstarter for me.

My mouth literally reflex spits it back out. Its that bad. I cant control myself with this stuff.

>> No.4241769

>>4241763
I find it to be more like a citrus-y broccoli except with a slightly better texture.

Put some ranch on it if you're that much of a fatass, OP

>> No.4241771

>>4241763

>its a little bitter
>little bitter
>little

R u kiding?

This is a joke right?

>> No.4241777
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4241777

>>4241771
collard greens and brussels sprouts are a million times worse for me

>> No.4241801

The taste of kale makes me think of radishes.
green leafy radishes

>> No.4241804

>>4241771
>R
>u

Fuck off back to /b/ child.

>> No.4241819

>>4241804

Stop being ck cancer and contribute to the thread with a tasty kale recipe or tits and timestamp or gtfo.

>> No.4241823

>>4241819
Fuck you, toss with olive oil and flavorings/spices and bake at 350 for 30 minutes.
Kale chips

>> No.4241826

>>4241819
Sweet potato and red lentil soup with kale just fucking thrown in there because it's delicious

>> No.4241874

Slightly fried Kale with Beans, peppers, and steak is the SHIT.

>> No.4241881

>>4241769
> Put some ranch on it if

Can you use kale for coleslaw?

>> No.4241883

>>4241881
I'll have to try that

>> No.4241884

>>4241823
better eat them fresh. That shit is rancid after a few hours

>> No.4241892
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4241892

>tfw ive been drinking nothing but smoothies made up of mostly kale/spinach/chard for the past 9 days

Its not great, but aint that bad. Stop being a faggot, OP

>> No.4241920

>>4241892
How is that working for you?

>> No.4241928

If you don't like it eat a different fucking vegetable. Like broccoli or something.

>> No.4241930

>>4241892
>needing to go on a juice diet because you can't control your eating

>> No.4241935

Colcannon

>> No.4241937

Obtain a new mouth, yours is defective.

Kale is fucking delicious when it's cooked.

>> No.4241947

GOD TIER KALE SALAD

>remove stems from kale
>slice up kale into bite sized pieces
>layer into a bowl
>cube up a red apple and place pieces on top of kale
>cube up 2 avocados and place on top of apples
>squirt lemon juice over the top to prevent browning and add flavor
>add a handful of walnuts
>add a handful of dried cranberries

for the dressing

>grate up 2 ginger roots
>mash up a clove of garlic
>add:
>soy sauce
>rice vinegar
>sesame seed oil
>olive oil
>bit of honey
>salt
>pepper

>> No.4241999

>>4241823
30 minutes? You like kale briquettes?

>> No.4242006

>>4241920
Not that guy, but drinking fresh veggie smoothies makes me feel fucking amazing. A kale, spinach, parsley, banana and green superfood powder smoothie is like taking 5-Hour Energy without the disgusting taste and risk of cancer.
>>4241930
>thinking super-concentrated nutrients that provide energy and aid in digestion is just for fatties

Do you even health?

>> No.4242012

Supposedly kale becomes sweeter after a frost, so you could try blanching it and then stick it in the freezer. I've never tried freezing greens without blanching first so I don't know how it would turn out if you froze it raw.

>> No.4242037

>>4241736

Fuck you punk ass motherfucker. Kale is awesome. Especially Hamburgerryg with kålpolser and gronlangkål.

>> No.4242039

>>4242006

What other reason is there to do a juice diet? Why not just eat some real fucking food?

>> No.4242054

Kale, garlic, olive oil and a hot pan.

Shit's delicious.

>> No.4242060

Stick it in a mushroom risotto for 5 minutes just before it's ready. Gives a nice bit of crunch to contrast the gloopiness of the risotto.

>> No.4242094

>>4241767
Kale isn't meant to be eaten raw. You can't even really digest it unless it's cooked first.

>> No.4242100

That looks like some tasty broccoli, OP!

>> No.4242339

>>4242039
Because ive lost 18 pounds in 10 days thats why

>> No.4242345
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4242345

But kale is the tastiest vegetable.

>> No.4242351

Why are there so many leaves on your kale? Only the stalks are meant to be eaten. I think I have found your problem, OP.

>> No.4242367

>>4242339
That's because you were previously fat.

>> No.4242372

and the most weight is lost during the first week, because the liver loses its glycogen stores. It's not actual fat loss. >>4242339

>> No.4242377

>>4242367
Yeah, I think everyone, including anon, understands that he did a juice fast to lose weight because he is overweight.

Are you dense?

>> No.4242385

>>4242377
>Are you dense?
I'm just big-boned.

>> No.4242421

>>4242345
not even close

>> No.4242457

>>4242094
You can digest it, it just makes you gassy as fuck. I get dem methane farts when I eat a lot of raw kale.

>> No.4242481

kale chips
you're fucking welcome

>> No.4242486

I like to make colcannon mashed potatoes with added kale.

Mash and season your 'taters, saute up a bunch of cabbage and kale in butter or bacon grease (not so much that there's a lot of liquid in the pan), fold into potatoes with chopped green onion and parsley.

The amounts are all to taste, but I recommend lots and lots of delicious kale in there.

Too bad it's a "superfood" in my pretentious town now, as the price has almost doubled because of it

>> No.4242507

>>4242486
>Too bad it's a "superfood" in my pretentious town now, as the price has almost doubled because of it
Good thing it's so easy to grow then.

>> No.4242526

>>4242507

It is? Does it do well inside? I don't have any outside space unless I want my veggies pissed in by the patrons of the bar on my street. Is it basically like growing most other greens?

>> No.4242553
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4242553

I actually 'discovered' kale today.

Chucked some into this disgusting-looking bean and lentil soup I made, 5 mins before it was done cooking.

Only put a bit in as I wasn't sure if I'd like it - but it's SO GOOD. Kinda like cabbage but a better texture.

I've got lots left so I'm going to try those kale chips now!

>> No.4242640

I hate kale raw, but I like it steamed and then sauteed with something else.

I'll cut off the center vein and throw it into the rice cooker when making rice. Tastes like spinach then.

Also makes me poop yay.

>> No.4242665

>>4242526
I have no experience growing it indoors. Sorry. Google it, perhaps? It could very well.

>> No.4242675

Thank you for the gift of kale chips, ck. Or should I say, SEAWEED! I'm going to make some seaweed bread with this stuff!

Would just like to second the anon who said LITTLE BIT of salt. I put way too much on - there is apparently such a thing as too much salt.

>> No.4242682

Try Tuscan kale aka "dinosaur kale". It has an awesome texture (looks like lizard skin) and is crunchier and slightly less bitter then normal kale. Great near the end of in a stir fry or a soup.

>> No.4242694
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4242694

>>4241823
Pic related

>> No.4242699

>>4242694
That's cause you're not meant to eat the leaves, bro.

>> No.4242707

>>4242699
But the entire thing is leaves.

>> No.4242712

I don't know, maybe you have different kale.

>> No.4243267

>>4242699
Of course you're supposed to eat the leaves, ya dipshit. It's a leafy green.

>> No.4243318

Kale is quite good but I can only stand it in soups

Try it with some soups op

>> No.4243399

>de-stem
>peanut oil, garlic, ginger in pan
>sautee that shit.
>eat over rice

>> No.4243403

Rinse it in cold salt water to tenderize and remove some of the bitterness before using it in ANY preparation

>> No.4243407

>>4243267
My family doesn't.

>> No.4243704

>>4242339
>Because ive lost 18 pounds in 10 days thats why

I hope you don't think this is actual fat loss, you've probably lost 1-2 pounds of actual fat at most.

>> No.4243713

ITT: fucking misinformed retards. (all of you)

>> No.4243716

>>4242339
>I used 6300 more calories per day than I ate
Are you an olympics?

>> No.4243719

>>4243407
Well your family is fucking weird. Who the fuck just eats the stems of leafy greens, or any vegetables for that matter?

>> No.4243724

>>4243716
Olympians consume shitloads of calories to compensate for burning shitloads. That swimmer guy, Phelps or whatever the fuck, eats like 10,000 calories a day while training for the Olympics. If they were running that much of a calorie deficit they would have no energy to train that hard.

>> No.4243727

>>4243704
What do you think he lost?

>> No.4243728

Everyone is giving you great advice OP, sautéed + butter + things with flavor is FUCKING DELICIOUS

DOOO ITTTT

It's harder to sauté with electric stove tops in my experience, but you'll figure it out.

>> No.4243734

I can't eat Kale either, or Mustard Greens. Just makes me grimace while chewing... naw. Tried cooking it too, felt sick and had to throw the shit out. Pulled all the bacon bits from it though.

>> No.4243735

I grew a shit load of kale one year and couldn't use it all.

I made kale chips, added it to soup, sauteed it, and ate it raw. If eating it raw, massage it with some lemon juice to soften.

Or just juice it. Kale really is a great vegetable.

>> No.4243740

>>4243734
bruh, that's sad. You cooked it wrong.

>> No.4243746

>>4243727
The bro-scientists that inhabit /ck/ and /fit/ think the human body retains 87 pounds of water weight.

>> No.4243749

>>4243746
Yeah I was wondering how he can think someone drinking juice and water can lose 20 pounds of water.

>> No.4243752

>>4243746
Never trust anyone's advice that doesn't call fat adipose tissue.

>> No.4243778

>>4243749
So much this.

>> No.4243786

>>4243749
Diets begin by depleting the glycogen stores in your muscles. This reduction in solute also reduces the solvent. I.e., you end up pissing/sweating out more liquid than you consume.

This is why it is so easy to lose the first 10-15 so rapidly.

>> No.4243793

>>4241881
Yeah but then it would be called kaleslaw :-D

>> No.4243796

>>4241736
Then just try something different. I don't like kale, but love collards.

>> No.4243799

There are people on this earth who were raised with mothers who couldn't cook vegetables. When raw, a lot of veggies are really horrible tasting. Properly cooked they are godlike.

If you ever have kids, learn to cook vegetables right, and you'll never have to hide them in their food.

>> No.4243802

>>4243746

Are they better or worse than the broscientists that think you can lose 63,000 Calories worth of fat in 10 days?

>> No.4243806

>>4243786
The key fault to the argument that diets such as the juice diet are just depleting liquid stores is that you don't get dehydrated. If that guy's body just lost 15+ pounds of liquid MORE than he was taking in he would be having severe cramps and digestion problems from the extreme dehydration.

One thing that comes from a juice fast or juice diet is an exceptionally thorough cleansing of the bowels. You can lose 5+ pounds of excrement that would have otherwise inhabited your guttyworks, being perpetually restocked by lousy food that's hard to digest and draw nutrients from.

>> No.4243810

>>4243802
No one said that that happened or happens. Of course some water weight is shed, but it's retarded to think that 15+ pounds of weight loss is attributable to water weight.

>> No.4243812

>>4243806

So if five pounds comes from the bowels, where do you think the other 13 or so comes from? Because it isn't fat.

>> No.4243823

>>4243812
So you think you just lose 13lbs of water, and your body will still be functional? Where does the water you're drinking go?

Concentration gradients son, if water is leaving water will come to replace it, otherwise you'd be all fucked up

>> No.4243826

>>4243823

see

>>4243786

I'm still waiting on where you think the other 10 or so pounds come from, since losing even 3 pounds of fat a week without an extremely strict diet and exercise program is hard.

>> No.4243835

>>4243812
Some of it most definitely is. A guy I worked with lost over 100 pounds on the juice diet and all he did for exercise was walk a few miles every day after the first 3 or 4 weeks on the diet.
You broscientists think you know everything about fitness but you're generally completely clueless.
EAT YOUR OATZ! HIGH WEIGHT, LOW REPS! EAT 150 GRAMS OF BROTEIN EVERY DAY! VEGETABLES DONT HAVE ENOUGH BROTEIN! SHITLOADS OF CASEIN IS FINE, DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE CANCER RISK! EC STACKS ARE FOR REAL MEN!

Fuck out of here.

>> No.4243837

>>4243826
Losing 3 pounds of fat in a week is hard if you're doing it the /fit/ way.

see

>>4243835

>> No.4243839

>>4243837
>Losing 3 pounds of fat in a week is hard if you're doing it the /fit/ way.

You mean the way where you don't lose most of your lean body mass in the process? Losing over 3 pounds a week isn't healthy for you either unless you're morbidly obese.

>> No.4243847

>>4243835
>A guy I worked with lost over 100 pounds on the juice diet and all he did for exercise was walk a few miles every day after the first 3 or 4 weeks on the diet.

And how long did that take him? A year? Maybe more? You're acting like a juice diet is some kind of magical thing that just melts fat off your body.

>> No.4243852

>>4243839
If you're trying to lose 3 pounds a week then you're obviously very overweight. What fit, healthy person needs to lose that much weight that quickly?
And when are you going to explain how someone could lose over 15 pounds of fluids in less than 2 weeks without suffering from severe dehydration?

>> No.4243854

>>4243847
It took him less than 6 months.
Watch Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead. It's not bullshit. Everything you hear on /fit/ is.

>> No.4243855

>>4243852
>And when are you going to explain how someone could lose over 15 pounds of fluids in less than 2 weeks without suffering from severe dehydration?

As soon as you explain how someone burns over 50,000 calories in 10 days.

>> No.4243856

>>4243826
hurr durr fancy words

If your muscles were losing all of their liquid masses(solute + solvent) that is where water will want to go. If it didn't, your body would shut down due to dehydration. How the fuck do you create a liquid deficit on a liquid diet when that's what you're consuming anyway? You can't into even basic physiology bro.

>> No.4243858

>>4243856
>fancy words

You have to be shitting me, how you find any of those words "fancy" is beyond me. Come on, let's here where those 10 extra pounds are magically disappearing to.

>> No.4243860

>>4241736
Make kale soup and put a hard boiled egg in each bowl of soup. It's pretty good.

http://translate.google.com/translate?sl=auto&tl=en&js=n&prev=_t&hl=en&ie=UTF-8&eotf=1&u=http%3A%2F%2Freceptfavoriter.se%2Frecept%2Fgroenkalssoppa-soppa-pa-groenkal.html&act=url

>> No.4243861
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4243861

>>4243793
>kaleslaw :-D
What the fuck is wrong with you?

>> No.4243862

>>4243856
lack of magnesium sodium and potassium. Salts are largely responsible for determining water retention in the body and maintaining the isotonic balance in the blood and tissues. See also electrolyte depletion in water fasting.

>> No.4243870

>make burger or sandwich
>put some kale on it
>fuckin delicious, mayne

>> No.4243883

>>4243862
Again, concentration gradients. You are so lost bruh.

>> No.4243940

>>4243883

Still waiting on you to explain where the 50k extra calories go, because you seem to be avoiding that question.

>> No.4243946

Make it into kale chips

the taste isn't bad but the texture is a little much for me to eat it prepared normally most of the time, baked into chips it's amazing though

>> No.4244187

>>4243940
A google search will tell you that while you're on a juice diet your body starts consuming fat at a rapid rate, which also releases additional sodium and potassium that gets stored in fat.

>> No.4244197

>>4244187
>this is what fatties really believe

Yes, your body will magically start to consume more calories than you use during the day, because you started drinking juice.

>> No.4244204

>>4242006
superfood?...
you mean avocado?0

>> No.4244208

>>4244197
It's a good thing you've done exhaustive research on the matter.
Oh wait, you're just a jerkoff on /ck/ who's too lazy to google the subject that you pretend to be an expert of.

>> No.4244209

>>4244204
Green superfood powder is a health supplement. If you've ever seen a healthy looking person drinking a dark green smoothie on TV or in a movie, that's green superfood powder.

>> No.4244210

Remove the large stems in the middle. Sautee them until they are soft and a brighter shade of green than when they started. Enjoy delicious kale.

>> No.4244235

>>4243793
>>4243861
lol'd hard

>> No.4244243

i like to fry it gently in a pan, and make scrambled eggs. i call it a green scramble.

>> No.4244430

Bumping this thread to get some easy ways to make veggies (broccoli, brussel sprouts, cauliflower, whatever) not so horrible to eat. I'm trying to replace some of all the carbs I usually eat with my dinner meals with greens. I'm a broke as fuck student, so cheap methods are greatly appreciated.

>> No.4244434

>>4244208

You don't need to do extensive research to do basic math and find out that you don't use 50k calories in 10 days unless you're either doing a fuckton of exercise or weigh over 300 pounds.

>> No.4246707

>>4244434
>how do i metabolism?

>> No.4246757

A friend of mine made what he called "Dutch Comfort food" (I can't remember how to pronouce it), but it was just basically mashed potatoes with a bunch of shit in it.
>Bacon
>Sausage
>Potatoes
>Kale

Mind you we were all drunk when we ate it, but from what I remember it was pretty fucking tasty...And sat like a brick in my stomach.

>> No.4246772

>>4246757
it was tasty because all of the other ingredients worked harmoniously together to overwhelm the shit taste of the kale.

>> No.4246784

>>4244430

Look up roast broccoli. This stuff is amazing. There are several different posts on it, but this one sums it up well enough.

http://www.amateurgourmet.com/2008/11/the_best_brocco.html

or this one:

http://www.ezrapoundcake.com/archives/6076

>> No.4246787

>>4246772
Possibly, but I do remember tasting something distinct that I couldn't put my finger on (Assumed it was the kale). But like I said...We were pretty drunk at the time.

>> No.4246801

>>4244430
Stir fries are a great way to make greens a bit more palatable to picky eaters (Though use olive oil instead of other oils).
Usually my stirfrys have:
>Chopped pork
>Chow mien noodles
>Broccoli
>Carrots
>Green beans
>Snap peas
>Teriaki Sauce and Sirachia mixed

>> No.4246842

>>4242039
A brief, temporary juice/smoothie diet is nice after you've had the stomach flu and still feel too queasy to eat solid food.

>> No.4246844

>>4242339
Enjoy your brittle bones and muscle loss. No one is supposed to lose that much in that short amount of time.

>> No.4246909

>>4246844
More bullshit from an uninformed person.
Americans drink more milk than just about every other country in the world yet has one of the highest rates of osteoporosis. The calcium found in vegetables is better for bone strength than that in milk because dairy causes the body to sap calcium from the bones.
And numerous vegetables have plenty of protein. Losing all of your muscle after becoming vegan or while juicing is bullshit.

>> No.4246926 [DELETED] 

>>4246844
Maybe he's full of fail and aids?

>> No.4246934

>>4241736
I feel your pain, OP.

I too, detest the flavor of kale but continue to eat it in the hopes of someday acquiring a taste for this very nutritious, tough-as-bark vegetable.

My advice:

Blender, and strong flavors. A bold spaghetti sauce hides it perfectly. Additionally, if you work it in regularly in very very small quantities, it's not quite as bad.

>> No.4246942

>>4246909
>Americans drink more milk than just about every other country in the world
Except for Finland and Sweden and the Netherlands and Switzerland and Greece and Montenegro and Denmark and Albania and Lithuania and Romania and Luxembourg and Kazakhstan and Norway and France and Italy.
You know... pretty much all of western Europe.

>yet has one of the highest rates of osteoporosis
Not "yet has." More like "as a result, has." Excessive dietary calcium leads to osteoporosis. The milk-is-good-for-the-bones thing came from American advertising campaigns of the boomer generation (late 40s through early 50s) from American dairy farmers. It is patently, and tragically, false. Imagine all those people who drank excess milk to combat osteopoenia and osteoporosis only to learn they caused themselves more damage than good. Pity.

>> No.4246946

WHAT THE FAACCCKKKK.

>Kale chips are my fuckin jam yo.
>Heat your god damn oven to 275
>Remove stems
>Put in bowl
>Add oil
>Add salt and pepper or other delicious things like nutritional yeast and garlic powder.
>Spread out on baking sheet
>Bake for 20 minutes motherfucker. Till that shit is crispy
>Touch yourself and eat the chips

fagoot

>> No.4247455

I fucking love Kale. Remove the stems, shred it up, fry that shit in bacon grease with some garlic and mustard seeds. Mmm.

>> No.4247460

>>4246942
If you're not trolling then you are one severely misinformed and uneducated person.