/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.4208504]

What was your worst cooking fuckup/most inedible concoction?

Mine still might be when I was 14 and decided I wanted a grilled cheese sandwhich. All we had was white bread and provolone, and I had no idea how to use a stove (I know, it was pathetic). So I microwaved two slices of fucking wonder bread with two slices of provolone in the middle.

Shit was fucking disgusting.

[Anonymous No.4208507]

GO NINERS

[Anonymous No.4208512]

once I tried to make non-instant tapioca and poured the whole box in (enough to make a couple gallons)
Cooked it for a while, it didn't look right, and then.....oh.
Had to calculate the right proportions from 1/4 of it and freeze the rest. Still ended up with way too much pudding.

[Anonymous No.4208516]

>16 oz. of spaghetti
>1 can of tomato sauce
>1 potato diced into cubes
>some garlic powder
>some parsley

:( It was bland and goopy. So much shame.

[Anonymous No.4208520]

>>4208504
I've made some mistakes in my time, but never as bad as when I had the flu/swimmers ear combo.

I was like 13, and I was horribly sick. I'm talking about 5 hours of throwing up, except I had nothing in my stomach, so every 5 seconds I would get up and puke this weird orange bile into the toilet.

I was also raised by retarded religious fundies in the woods who knew nothing of science, so they didn't give a fuck when I took over 2600 milligrams of pain-killers every time I had a headache.

So the day after my puke-athon, I decided I had had enough. I took craptons of liquid drugs, and then I decided to eat something. The only problem was that I hated swallowing pills, so I would try to crush them up into my tea or food.
So i make this disgusting microwavable diet pasta crap, and then I crush up something like 2400 miligrams of meds into it (I had already drank like 1800 mgs), and I took a bite....

Oh god it was horrible. It was so bad, dude. that mouthful of food was worse than the day that preceded it. And now I've probably got brain or liver damage or whatever happens when you parents let you take shittons of painmeds.

[Anonymous No.4208525]

>>4208520
more likely liver damage. The chance of brain damage from NSAIDs or Acetaminophen is fairly low even at those levels.

[Anonymous No.4208526]

I believe I made rice for the first time, in an attempt to replicate a thai dish I tried at a restaurant. I used 1 cup of rice and 2 cups of water in a new rice cooker, and started a sauce with coconut milk and like 5 kaffir lime leaves.

The rice came out runny of course, because I used twice as much water as I should have, and then I put it into a runny sauce of coconut milk, mushrooms and shrimp, in which it cooked further, and I ended up with a rice porridge thing that was HEAVILY flavoured with lime leaf. It was fucking nasty, and to this day, I can't eat anything that has been seasoned with kaffir lime leaves.

[Anonymous No.4208527]

I had a bottle of port wine, some cornstarch, a can of shredded chicken, heavy cream, and a package of button mushrooms. It didn't end well.

[Porsche 959 No.4208529]

I used to be terrible at mixing drinks.

From ages 15 to 17, my bedroom was right next to our awesome party room at my dad's house, complete with a full bar.
At night, I would sneak in and make god awful concoctions.

Imagine if you can...Surfer Cooler Capri-Sun and Gin....Grape Juice, Tequila, and Blue Curacao...So many horrible things...

And I drank every last abomination I made.

[Anonymous No.4208547]

I knew this guy who made a salsa sandwich. Just straight, cold salsa in between two pieces of bread. Nothing else. Sounded fucking horrendous to me.

[Anonymous No.4208557]

I boiled the rice and the beans together, overcooking and undercooking them, respectively. And I boiled them in milk. And I tried several additions to make it edible, such as sweet spicy sauce, which made it even worse.

And I ate the whole thing, because YOU DON'T THROW AWAY FOOD.

[Anonymous No.4208562]

>>4208547
oh god thats horrible.

My dad loves peanut butter and butter sandwiches. And he really slathers on that butter, too.

[Anonymous No.4208563]

>>4208547
Sounds delicious.

[Anonymous No.4208566]

>>4208525
Good to know. I'm pretty sure we'll be able to replace or repair livers easily within the next 4 years or so. Brains are a bit trickier, though.

[Anonymous No.4208567]

>>4208566
40*

[Anonymous No.4208579]

>>4208566
also we have liver transplants today, we don't have brain transplants.

[Anonymous No.4209456]

>>4208520
Crushed up pills taste like fucking sour chalk. I once had a horrible poison ivy infection because I am super sensitive to it and had to go on steroids. I could not swallow pills and I crushed them up and put them in apple sauce.

Never again.

[LadyAtreides No.4209460]

One time I made my boyfriend chicken marsala. When I was reducing the sauce, I tried something new and left few circular slices of lemon in there to look pretty. Bad idea. The rinds made the sauce really bitter. It was inedible.

[Anonymous No.4209461]

>1rst time Making Pho Ga
>Comes out bretty guud for a white americano
>Been drinking merlot all day
>Wine makes me tired
>Leave the Pho Ga on low/medium
>Dumbass
>Wake up the next day

[Anonymous No.4209473]

>>4208520
if it was just ordinary paracetamol painkillers you were eating there is no need to worry unless you were really small as a kid. you can eat quite insane amounts before causing liver failure (unless you eat large doses often and over several days).

[Anonymous No.4209480]

can we please not post vomit pics on a food bored¿ thanks

[Anonymous No.4209487]

>>4209473

misinformation.jpg

what is the point of this. the threshold for paracetamol toxicity is really low, it's much more dangerous than almost any other OTC drug.

[Anonymous No.4209491]

>>4209487
>stupidity

show me your sources.

[Anonymous No.4209502]

>>4209491
http://www.fda.gov/ohrms/dockets/a09/briefing/2009-4429b1-01-FDA.pd>From 1998 to 2003, acetaminophen was the leading cause of acute liver failure in the United
States, with 48% of acetaminophen-related cases (131 of 275) associated with accidental
overdose.

[Anonymous No.4209513]

>>4209502
that's not a source, that doesnt say anything.

> http://bestpractice.bmj.com/best-pctice/monograph/337/basics.html
> In adults and adolescents, hepatic toxicity may occur following ingestion of >7.5 grams but is unlikely if <150 mg/kg has been ingested.

Assuming he was 45kg at 13 that would mean he had to ingest around ~6750mg of paracetamol to risk acute liver failure, which is far more than the 4000mg or so that he ingested in total.

[Anonymous No.4209515]

>>4208547
My boyfriend does this. I just give him a horrified look when he offers me a bite.

[Anonymous No.4209519]

It was buffalo chicken and rice, found the recipe from some app on my phone. Sounded good enough (and because I love wings), chicken, hot sauce, blue cheese, some sour cream, etc. However, when combined it tasted, smelled, and looked like vomit. I don't know if I failed in preparation somewhere, or if it was destined to be a failure from the get go, but never again.

[Anonymous No.4209520]

pls delete vomit threds from /ck/ and never post again. thnkx

[Anonymous No.4209530]

I made blackberry cabbage shrimp water.

[Anonymous No.4209564]

I've never made anything super horrible, but sometimes I've thrown off an ingredient or two and the dishes didn't come out as very appetizing.

Last week I had made a green bean stir fry with some soy sauce, a dash of brown sugar, peanut butter, and garlic. I had made it before, but for some reason I added a lot more peanut butter than I should have. What I got were basically sweet, nutty beans. It was edible but it wasn't something you'd wanna eat a lot of. I pitched the majority of it. It was more like candy.

[Anonymous No.4209586]

Microwaved a frozen/pre-cooked hamburger patty and put it in a blender along with a can of tomato sauce when I was younger.

I thought I was going to make spaghetti sauce.

It did not go well. Pretty sure I threw it out because it turned into pink, inedible mush.

[Anonymous No.4209597]

>>4208557
>YOU DON'T THROW AWAY FOOD

>tfw burnt beans on the bottom
>tfw you can smell the burntness with every bite but you still eat them all anyway

[Anonymous No.4209689]

>>4208557
Just had some mouldy toast , because you DEFINITELY don't throw away food, least to say bread. Thanks, grandma.

The most horrible thing I've cooked was my first attempt of spinach cream soup when I used frozen cut spinach. Shit was so disgusting, looked like swamp water. I tried adding extra cream, extra cheese, extra bacon, salt and black pepper - no improvement, of course. Needles to say, I ate it all and didn't cook anything requiring spinach in almost 4 years.

[Anonymous No.4209692]

One time I didn't feel like going to the store and didn't have tomatoes on hand so I tried using premade jar pasta sauce in my slow cooker.

[Anonymous No.4209702]

>Come home steaming at 4am
>hungry
>roughly chop potato, onion and carrot
>saute for about 30 seconds in pot
>add can of heinz tomato soup
>add can of heinz baked beans
>add a shitload of black pepper
>cook for like ten minutes
>try it
>quite literally the worst thing I've ever eaten
>raw potato, onion and carrot in horiffically peppery tomato soup/baked bean mix
>think i'll fix it in the morning
>put entire pot in the freezer
>flatmate finds it two days later

First year of university was pretty crazy.

[Anonymous No.4209713]

>>4209513
It's like 3 or 4 tablets more, dude.

[Anonymous No.4209718]

Moved into a dorm, never used electric stove before. Long story short, placed a tupperware container on a hot hob, it melted instantly and got burned pasta sauce over everything.

[Anonymous No.4209785]

A friend and I, after discussing how hopeless we both are in the kitchen, decided to grab a cookbook and give it a whirl. We picked some Cuban pork dish, can't even remember what, and wound up substituting a few of the more exotic ingredients we couldn't find at our local shop. We had one bite each and decided to dine on vodka instead.

[Anonymous No.4209797]

Once i cooked some Uncle Bens teriyaki rice as per the instructions on the package.
Worst cooking mistake ever, had to drown it in teriyaki marinade to make it palatable.

[Anonymous No.4209811]

>>4209797
i liked pic related a lot until I figured out I could make it myself for a lot cheaper.

[Anonymous No.4209839]

i saw a japanese bento with american ingredient sushi ... wanted to try it out. The original was ham and cheese slices with cucumber and carrots. I didn't have all those things so...

I improvised ...

carrotes, hotgods, and chese product slices with unagi sauce and accidentally put in too much sushi flavor stuff in the rice... fucking... ugh. never again.

[Anonymous No.4209883]

Cheddar noodle tuna helper


with chocolate milk....

[Anonymous No.4209903]

>>4209839
>hotgods

[Anonymous No.4209906]

>>4209460
the pith of any citrus fruit does that, if you want a citrusy taste use the zest and juice, not the white part.

[Anonymous No.4209911]

under cooked beans, over cooked rice when I tried to make Arrozygandules, and I forgot the cilantro

[Anonymous No.4209914]

>>4209718
dat feel

I left my plastic cutting board on there for a few seconds and a huge chunk melted away. I still use it though because I can't afford to replace it.

[Anonymous No.4209982]

>>4209914
You stole my request from that /r9k/ draw thread you faggot. I will be pressing charges.

[Anonymous No.4210082]

>>4208529

There's nothing wrong with this. I use to make 'shutdown specials' all the time. A bit of everything from the liquor cabinet. The most fucked up thing so far? Boxed red wine, vermouth, gin, rum, Kahlua and amaretto.

Oh boy was that one hell of a drink.

[Anonymous No.4210114]

There's so many good bad recipe stories I could pull out of Boy Scouts, but my favorite was how we would slather two slices of white bread in hot sauce as a snack. I love hot sauce, but something about soggy white bread would pretty much turn me green.

[Anonymous No.4210135]

I wanted to eat some pasta with sauce. I had nothing but pickles and canned tuna in the fridge, so I made some white sauce (butter and flour), mixed it with tuna and minced pickles, added some garlic. It was awful, it stinked so bad. My roomate womited just from smelling it. I threw it away after trying. My flat was stinky for a few days after it. Never again.

[Anonymous No.4210202]

>chicken maruchen ramen+grape flavorice
OH GOD WHAT HAVE I DONE?!?

>overdo it on the lemon salt when grilling Cajun chicken
Never again

>overdo it on the curry when grilling Cajun chicken
>out of milk
>in shower with clothes on and head in my mouth

>ketchup on cheap lunchroom pizza
this is marginally worse than plain cheap lunchroom pizza.

[Anonymous No.4210220]

>>4208504
Sketti.

[Anonymous No.4210233]

>>4210202
Oh, this one was inedible, but not in a bad way (if you can keep it down it tastes awesome, but the human body isn't meant to ingest this shit)

get some tang mix, some country time lemonade mix, some country time pink lemonade mix and some grape mix (propel will work). Add them to enough water to make any one of them...but not all 4 so you get 4x the mix per water.

I call it Über Tang. It is the tartest thing in existence.

[Anonymous No.4210254]

I didn't cook it, but I sampled it.

My female friend invited me over. So I went over to her house. I got there and she had been trying to cook something since her mother never kept anything in the house ready-to-eat.

She asked me to sample her culinary masterpiece.

From the ingredients on the counter, I knew I was in for trouble.

She had:
>cooked rice
>put milk over it.
>heating it more
>dropped in some spices
>a few diced vegetables.
>a few slivers of leftover chicken strips.

I took a big spoonful and held my poker face as long as possible.

It actually started expanding in my mouth with every chew. Had to spit it out.

I took her to Chili's out of sympathy

[Anonymous No.4210279]

>>4210254
Worst food I've ever sampled is the Chinese water chestnut.

[Anonymous No.4210294]

I tried to make meringues or some shit, when i was 12 and at home by myself. added a shitton of sugar, didn't know what I was doing, abandoned the idea, and tried to salvage the whole thing by reincorporating the yolks and making a sweet scrambled egg. so I had disgustingly sweet scrambled eggs, with a side of bitter failure.

[Anonymous No.4210297]

I made a lemon meringue pie when I was like 14..

I did something wrong, and it tasted like lemon flavored eggs..

NEVER AGAIN.

[Anonymous No.4210316]

>>4209460
>im a grl btw

[Anonymous No.4210485]

>>4209460
my pet peeve is when people go overboard on the zest.

made a nice lemon souffle the other day, but my roommate insisted on using an asston of zest. every single bite was just a mouthful of zest, completely ruined it imo.

[Anonymous No.4210516]

>>4210279
Oh god, seconding this. I can't fucking stand water chestnuts.

[Anonymous No.4210570]

When I was eight I had a huge hard-on for those orange shaped chocolates that you had to hit against a table to break apart; so on my father's birthday I decided to bake him a chocolate cake with orange Tang mixed into it. It probably wouldn't have been so terrible if I didn't add in a whole fucking jar of that shit.

[Anonymous No.4210574]

Thought I could substitute tomato juice for actual tomatoes when making a sauce

[Anonymous No.4210618]

>>4209702
Sophomore year, frustrated with eating off a meal plan and getting the shits.
Buy a nice steak
"I don't know what the fuck i'm doing"
Decide to rub some salt on said steak
Use fine grain table salt
Use the whole fucking container (pic related)
Buddy says I should marinade it
Use a whole bottle of Kens Steak house BS

>mfw I made salt jerky
>mfw I googled "salt poisoning"

[Anonymous No.4210624]

Once I made popovers but forgot salt, and they were pretty gross, but the WORST thing was when I decided to make my own tomato sauce. I blended up cherry tomatoes from the garden and looked at the ingredients on canned tomatoes to try and recreate it. I ended up boiling it all and added milk-I'm pretty sure I curdled it while doing so because it tasted exactly like vomit.
Also, it was good at the time, but horrifying to think of now..I used to have 'cheese fests' with a friend of mine, and we would make nachos and grilled cheese and use like half a package of plastic american cheese to do so

[Anonymous No.4210625]

My worst mistake that I still ate, at least partially an remember it being disgusting.

I wanted some new grilled cheese ideas, and a friend said Nutella was really good in them. Being an idiot I added cheese and nutella together thinking it was an odd mix but she said it was really nice.
Don't mix cheese and chocolate together, it's disgusting.


I forgot to add the flour into some brownies once and couldn't work out why they didn't work for hours. Still ate them melted. I didn't own measuring scales either so there was way too much sugar in there.

[Anonymous No.4210628]

>>4209785
Thank goodness booze has calories. I never woulda made it my first few years on my own

[Anonymous No.4210632]

>>4208529
A friend of mine had a huge party at her parent's deer ranch, and her brother was in charge of mixing drinks. We had some coconut rum that we mixed with root beer and it was pretty tasty (16 year old girls, judge away). When we went back for refills, he'd used it all and mixed it with rum and jager. Worst drink ever.

[Anonymous No.4210643]

>>4210220

Possibly the greatest /ck/ thread of all time.

[Anonymous No.4210645]

Had never had a cold soup before, so a friend of mine and I decided to try and make some almond soup thing. Should have known I was in trouble from the ingredients...70% oil, 10% bread, 10% sherry vinegar, 10% almond

[Anonymous No.4210674]

>>4210570
Fuck yeah whack an orange. Those things are the fucking best.

[Anonymous No.4210694]

>>4210674
>those oranges
I always hated those things.

Oh, I've got a funny rock solid fuckhuge chocolate story.

An idiot gave me a giant hershey's kiss w/ nothing to break it apart. I had to saw it apart with my library card.

[Anonymous No.4210699]

>most inedible concoction?
3 Crunch bars...at once.

Shot up my nose and burned like a motherfucker when I shoved the last bit in.

[Anonymous No.4210722]

>>4210516
i have trichotillomania and water chestnuts are the exact same crunch sensation as the ideal hair root

[Anonymous No.4210793]

A simple cheese and spinach quiche, not a single thing i did right making it. The pastry was too salty and hard and the filling was too over seasoned, couldn't even taste the spinach.
Never again

[Anonymous No.4210809]

>>4210793
If you suck so much at cooking, why'd you jump all the way to quiche

[Anonymous No.4210893]

>>4210809
I don't know, thought it would be simple enough.

[Anonymous No.4210904]

>>4210809
Even experienced cooks fuck up occasionally.

I once accidentally added 2 or 4 times as much water to a muffin recipe due to being an inattentive prick and the end result was horrifying...the outside was undercooked and the inside was paste

[Anonymous No.4210914]

Bought some cheapo fish from the local grocery store.
It came with the skin attatched, so instead of just removing it, I piled on salt to mask the overwhelming fish flavor then sauteed it.

I've made plently of bad stuff, but It was the only time I was incapable of eating something I made. It was way too salty and still tasted like bad fish

[Anonymous No.4210932]

>worst cooking fuckup
easy mode is I set fire to popcorn
medium mode is i accidentally used salt instead of sugar for strawberries
what the fuck was i thinking mode is every fucking time i try to substitute another fruit for mango in mango chicken anything

i eat mango chicken soup 1 fucking time and i've yet to adequately recreate it w/ a knock-off.

furthermore i keep forgetting to buy mangos....

[Anonymous No.4210937]

>most inedible concoction
To be fair I was sleepwalking when I decided it was food and only woke up when I tried to eat it, but...rabbit pelt

[Anonymous No.4210953]

A friend of mine put my home made chicken seasoning on pepperoni pizza and told me it was god-tier, but i knew what was in it and didn't have the heart to even smell it. I have mixed some odd shit in my day but that shit was not going near my sensory organs.

[Anonymous No.4210967]

>>4210632

oh god I did exactly this. mixed some malibu and root beer and when i had it I tried not to throw up. it's hard for me to gag from something disgusting too

[Anonymous No.4211119]

I was pulled away from the stove while making wonton noodle soup. When I came back everything was super soft and the broth had mostly boiled away, so I thought okay, let it sit, put some chili garlic sauce on it, and try to eat it as a gross-looking but hopefully fine-tasting plated noodle dish.

After a taste, I fed it to the garbage disposal.

[Anonymous No.4211130]

>>4210937

AHAHAHAHAHAH wat. I can't stop laughing...

[Anonymous No.4211219]

Not me, but this is from a fellow /ck/ poster a year or so ago.

Basically they joined a culinary club of some sort at their school. They would go to someone's house and eat whatever is cooked. The members made salsa rice which was basically hot rice mixed with cold salsa. They also made chicken... which was drowned with sweet baby ray's bbq sauce.

[Anonymous No.4211275]

>>4211219
>They also made chicken... which was drowned with sweet baby ray's bbq sauce.
Dude I waffle my grilled chicken so I can get more of that sauce on the meat at once. Shit is delicious.

[Anonymous No.4211328]

>>4211275
He basically said they boiled the chicken in sauce. Like they filled a giant pot of bbq sauce and put the chicken in it to boil.

[Anonymous No.4211336]

>>4211328
Oh...yeah that might not work out

[Anonymous No.4211342]

When I was about 12 I accidentally poured way too much milk into my Kraft Mac and Cheese mix. I had heard that you can use flour to thicken things! I dumped probably 1/2 cup of straight up flour into the thin, milky sauce. Needless to say it didn't thicken as nicely as I had imagined.

[Anonymous No.4211427]

misreading a recipe for canadian cheese soup

"one cup of chicken stock powder"

instead of

"one cup of chicken stock"

MAH SODIUM INTAKE!!!!

[Anonymous No.4211492]

Maybe not the most inedible but when I was 7 I tried mixing chocolate milk mix with water. It tasted terrible so I kept adding more and more powder but it never got any better. It took me about a year until I realized you were supposed to add milk not water.

[Anonymous No.4211517]

I seem to be cursed when it comes to making cheesecakes. I've yet to make one that's even semi-edible.

[Anonymous No.4211519]

The first time I made white gravy when I was younger. I had no concept of making a roux and then adding milk and waiting for it to thicken. I ended up making a half assed roux, then adding enough milk to fill the pan and getting impatient when it didn't thicken immediately. I must have added 3 cups of straight flour to it and ended up with something akin to wall paste.

...even the dog wouldn't eat that shit.

[Anonymous No.4211535]

So I saw something on either the Travel Channel or Food Network on chili spaghetti. So I made my own chili (which turned out great) and when it was done I boiled some spaghetti. I topped the spaghetti with the chili and some cheddar cheese. I thought it was great, but the entire family just sat there poking at it. They eventually told me it was terrible and went out to eat. Feels bad man.

[Anonymous No.4211539]

I just ate 3 turkey dogs flash fried in canola oil. I feel sick

[Anonymous No.4211589]

Worst thing I ever made was in Home Ec class in 6th grade I made apple cinnamon muffins.

Except I used salt instead of sugar. Oh god they tasted like apples in ocean water. Absolutely horrific.

[Anonymous No.4211629]

So are pics of people puking the norm on a cooking board? Seems a little childish and disgusting.

[Anonymous No.4211636]

Cea.

It's tea and coffee.

[Anonymous No.4211641]

>>4211629

If that's what makes you feel queasy, you should run while you still can.

[Anonymous No.4211644]

>>4210279
I thought I was the only one! Everyone in my family loves them and acts like I'm crazy when I pick them out.

[Anonymous No.4211660]

Nothing too insane, I tried to make a candy bar when I was younger by taking instant hot cocoa and freezing it.

[Anonymous No.4211662]

>>4208504

Wow, that's crazy, my worst food experience is also with a grilled cheese sandwich. I tried to duplicate this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BlkNkfmRY

And fucked it up something terrible. I ate most of it but threw the rest out because I started getting sick. It was the first time I'd ever gotten sick from food. Dunno what went wrong.

[Anonymous No.4211785]

>>4211535
Wow, doesn't sound like you didn't do anything wrong, unless your taste was completely off.

Maybe your family just wouldn't have enjoyed spaghetti and chili no matter how it was prepared. Me, I love it.

[Anonymous No.4211793]

>>4211785
>doesn't sound like you didn't do anything wrong
Em, please shoot me. I meant:
>doesn't sound like you did anything wrong

[Anonymous No.4211977]

Smoked porter, dried fruit and stouffers sesame chicken. Never threw up harder in my life and my stomach was sick for a week afterwards.

[Anonymous No.4212002]

When I was a kid, I used to make spaghetti some nights so my mum wouldn't have to cook after work.

It was a basic recipe but they usually liked it. And then one day, feeling experimental and not knowing the different between spices and herbs, decided to add a tablespoon of Chinese 5 Spice.

It was awful, and to this day when I cook anything, my family always tells me to "go easy on the 5 spice".

[Anonymous No.4212120]

One I genuinely thought might work was sticking mushrooms, eggs and a full sausage into a blender then frying them. Minging.

Ive also cooked a steak in blue WKD. Minging.

In terms of drinks I have loads. Sangria mixed with absinthe? Don't do it. Rose wine and Baileys? Don't do it, it curdles.
Frosty Jacks (White cider), Buckfast (fortified wine), red bull and 3 grams of mephedrone?
Do NOT do it.

[Anonymous No.4212122]

Tried to make popcorn with the corn in my hamster's food when i was little. Didn't work and ruined mom's pot. Got in big trouble for that one.

[Anonymous No.4212266]

Half an hour ago I mixed leek and tinned herring in mustard sauce in a pan and heated it.

It's vile. That sauce is disgusting. I gag when I think of the taste. Unfortunately, I'm a poorfag and the shitty herring was on sale. It looks like vomit too.

[Anonymous No.4213483]

>>4210932
>what the fuck was i thinking mode is every fucking time i try to substitute another fruit for mango in mango chicken anything
>i eat mango chicken soup 1 fucking time and i've yet to adequately recreate it w/ a knock-off.

What THE FUCK did i just read..?

[Anonymous No.4213499]

>>4209530
How did that happen? It doesn't sound like something that sounded like it could've been a good idea.

[Anonymous No.4213519]

I wanted to make vermicelli noodles boiled in wine (done this before, it's pretty good), but the only wine I had was jaundiced as fuck. I kept adding shit to counterbalance the sourness: cinnamon, curry, orange essence...

I somehow managed to salvage the noodless, but the soup was the foulest thing I've ever tasted (and smelled)

[Anonymous No.4213520]

>>4210645
>70% oil
Why...just...why?

[Anonymous No.4213534]

I tried to make a sandwich. Leftover steak. And mayo.

[Anonymous No.4213543]

I made a Creme Caramel once. It looked presentable but I dropped it... Then my dog decided to eat the remains and vomit everywhere seconds later. Glad I didn't eat it.

I've also had a Pizza sit in the oven for hours and still be fucking raw. Turns out I but too much sauce on it.

[Anonymous No.4213582]

>>4210694
Bitch, you attack that shit with your face. What the fuck you talkin about 'break it apart' bullshit? If I was you, I'd just go shoot myself from the amount of fucktarded you are.

[Anonymous No.4213801]

Nowhere as bad as some of the stuff in this thread but...

>Making oatmeal while sleepy
>For some dumb reason (at the time) my family was keeping salt in old honey bottles.
>I like a good amount of honey on my oatmeal.
>I think I felt my blood pressure rise after the first bite.

As a kid:

>Watch all the grownups drink tea.
>Notice that tea is a pale brown color.
>Child logic: I can pretend I'm drinking tea if I tint some water brown!
>Add about a spoonful of soy sauce to a glass of water.
>"But soy sauce is salty, let's add a bit of sugar to 'neutralize' the taste" (I had the notion that sugar neutralized salt and vice versa)
>Bleeeeeeeeeegh.

[Anonymous No.4214039]

One time I tried to make microwave coffee mug cake, it solidified into a giant hunk of rock-hard brown flour shit. I tried to chip away at it and eat it, it tasted like food coloring intensified

[Anonymous No.4214078]

>>4211589
I had somethig similar... these girls got tasked with making cornbread and used salt instead of sugar... It tasted like salty play-doh...

[Anonymous No.4214343]

tried to make a cheddar beer soup. It pretty much tasted like salty beer, and the cheddar separated into grease at the top and a tasteless, inedible glob at the bottom.

[Anonymous No.4214440]

Mixing ice tea and milk.

[Anonymous No.4214448]

>>4209903

today I put,...........JELLY on this HOTGOD.

[Anonymous No.4214451]

>>4211328
maybe they thought it was the same thing as cooking chicken with bbq sauce in a crock pot.