/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.3745762]

What's the worst you've injured yourself while cooking?

Apart from small nicks and minor burns, I just had to get 6 stitches in my ring finger yesterday because a knife fell off the counter and sliced me on the way down.

[Anonymous No.3745764]

>ring finger

Meant middle finger, the pic is of me

[Anonymous No.3745768]

>>3745762
Why were you laying on the floor?

[Anonymous No.3745772]

>>3745768
I wasn't, that's a reflection off a glass table

[Anonymous No.3745773]

one time i was fucking wasted and slicing up fajita meat and i sliced my finger open and bled all over the cutting board and meat slices. just washed em off and ate that shit.

[Anonymous No.3745776]

>>3745772
Not in the pic, I meant when you got cut.

[Anonymous No.3745780]

>>3745773
Careful, bro. You might give yourself AIDS when you eat your own blood.

[Anonymous No.3745787]

>>3745776
Oh, I wasn't then either. I was standing next to the counter, there was a knife underneath a towel. I moved the towel, the knife swiveled over the edge of the counter, and toppled over the side. I tried to get out of the way but it got me on the way down. It was a pretty heavy and sharp knife, so it just sliced right through part of my finger...It could've easily been much worse.

[Paranoid No.3745788]

Spilled boiling water on my hand, it was dumb, but I was lucky as I got it off really fast and got it treated so no major marks, just some discoloration.

[Anonymous No.3745794]

>>3745773
>blood fajita
totally metal

[Anonymous No.3745798]

I've never injured myself badly, but when I was three or four my mother was cooking spaghetti and spilled a very large pot of boiling water onto my back. She threw me into a cold shower right away though, so thankfully I don't have any scars to show for it.

[Anonymous No.3745799]

I've tried to cut things with the dull end of the knife more times than I can count on my gashed-up fingers

[Anonymous No.3745809]

>>3745799
That's just dumb.

[Anonymous No.3745815]

>>3745780
my friends ate it too. they saw it happen and didn't give a fuck. they thought it was funny. whiskey tends to do that, making people not give a damn.

[Anonymous No.3746446]

I have minor burns from being the original peanut butter cookies = fire guy

[Anonymous No.3746455]

>Long day at uni
>Tired
>Pissed off because of many a reason all throughout the day
>Come home
>Drink a glorious, czech beer
>Chill
>Drink another glorious czech beer
>Room-mate reminds me that it's my turn to cook
>Irritation builds
>Start cooking
>Have to open a can
>Can-opener breaks (piece of shit Tesco hardware)
>Throw a complete shit-fit
>Pin can against the counter and my leg
>Grab knife
>Try to stab the lid open
>Hits my thigh
>A very deep cut
>Bleeds like a motherfucker

Apart from almost bleeding to death (I tied a kitchen-towel around it) I ruined a pair of jeans and my under-wear. I have a pretty ugly scar from it.

[Anonymous No.3746457]

I sliced my left index finger on the side. Just a very thin, 2cm long slice along the side of the finger. Happened while chopping chili pepper, it hurt like shit. I have a beautiful scar to this day.

[Anonymous No.3746470]

I've had some minor burns from hot oil and a few small cuts, but nothing serious.

[Anonymous No.3746472]

14 years old.

National Pioneering Competition, Scouts.

Backwoodsman Cooking event.

We began in the morning, but it unexpectedly rained, yet no one quit because Backwoodsman Cooking was one of the toughest sections to score in, and as such also the most prestigious.

We began covering our open roast in aluminium foil and dug it deep into the extinguished fire pit to let it slow cook from the residual heat emanating from the hot coals. Three of us held a large poncho folded into a triangle over the top to prevent the rain from entering the fire pit- we wanted four, but three men was all we could spare. Two men including me were prone on the ground with our upper bodies under the overhanging cover taking turns fanning the coals and managing the dough sticks.

It took about 5 minutes for the rain to get heavy, and somewhere around 15 minutes in, a branch from the tree above us broke off and struck me on my calf and giving me a hairline fracture on my ankle and femur.

The worst part was that the corn was burnt to crisp and our dumplings were overcooked.

[Anonymous No.3747926]

Had a cut that deep once... cut myself with a serrated blade while working at Jimmy John's (not sure if that counts as cooking, but whatever.)
I just put a Band-Aid on that bitch. Now there's a slightly visible line on my finger.
Also have some burns from my current job. Waiting on this big forearm burn to heal. Need to invest in some more coats... :-S

[MOMO !!A8BrPmZzO+j No.3747934]

>that feel when attempt to catch falling knife
>that feel when knife nearly severs your hand
>that feel when no medic
>that feel when all alone
>that feel

all dem feels

[Anonymous No.3747944]

>>3745762
good knife! Um.... Bad cook!

Ive skiced but by far the worst is burns: milk or oil. Holly shit.

[Anonymous No.3748221]

this happened at work, not at home but still relevant
>go to grab knife off magnetic strip
>greasy hand slips off the knife and hits the one next to it

i essentially cut the back of my knuckle off but the live flesh stayed attached on a small skin-hinge
i cut it off myself with a pair of office scissors in my bathroom when i got home that night

[Anonymous No.3748238]

I have scars on my hands from a drunken attempt to take a pizza out of an oven.

[Anonymous No.3748240]

>>3747934
Heh, the first reaction to something falling is always to catch it isn't it? I've come close but let it fall and had the knife bite into my shoe and cut my foot anyways. Well fuck.


Working at a small bistro it was a one man line on the early weekdays. That meant I had to do the dishes as well. After close and a good 20 min of dish washing my hand wrested against something strange in the now murky dish water. 'What is that?' I wondered so I ran my finger along it to get a better idea. I then found out one of the servers had just thrown the bread knife into water without telling me. With my hands all soft and wrinkly from a good period of having them in the water I could feel 4 edges of the serrated blade enter, leave, and re-enter my finger underwater. A strange sensation, indeed. When I flung my hand out of the water a plume of bloody dishwater when everywhere. I had blood on the walls, bread cabinet, the ceiling...the place looked like a charnel house. Only 4 stitches, though.

[MOMO !!A8BrPmZzO+j No.3748256]

>>3748240
Usually i just flinch and dodge it, but since my hand was near and I was trying to be cool (all by myself) I thought I'd actually make it. I didn't.

[Anonymous No.3748258]

>Naked
>Amateur
>Frying up some delicious chicken wangs

[Anonymous No.3748280]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DiezfhaxVQw
i can't believe no one has posted this yet.

[pug !Seared4Qro No.3748307]

>cut avocado in half
>lodge knife in pit to remove it
>wasn't paying enough attention, come at it from the side
>pit rotates in place along with knife, knife slices edge of palm open

Hurt a lot.

[Anonymous No.3748334]

I was making pad thai while at least 10 shots of vodka into a party night. I was dicing something when I looked up from my work. Came down on two fingers substantially and bled like a stuck pig while running around looking for bandages.

Kitchen looked like I'd done some halal butchery.

[Anonymous No.3748360]

>>3748307
this, so many fucking times. and it's always just after i've re-sharpened the knives.

[Rootcellar4tehwin No.3748439]

>be 2 months ago
>Finish chopping up some zucchini and red onion to put on skewers.
> turn around and knock metal spit off of counter with chicken on it.
>lands vertically in my foot.
>mfw my foot is pinned to the kitchen floor with a metal spit sticking through it.

Ill try to upload a pic of the scar once I find some batteries for my camera
>wtfijustchargedthesebatteriesyesterdayandtheyarenowdead.jpg

[Anonymous No.3748446]

>>3748439
JEEEEEEEEESUS CHRIIIIIIIIST!

[Rootcellar4tehwin No.3748455]

>>3748446
Yeah... was not fun. Had to go to the ER and get a few shots. Hurt like a mother when they washed it out.

The right side of that foot is still numb due nerve damage from a blood clot that formed. But Im still cooking more than ever so ehhh.. could have been worse.

Only redeeming memory from injury was my fathers reaction
>walks around corner when he hears me yell
> looks at my foot
>looks me in the eyes with the straightest face ive ever seen
>"I'm not eating that chicken... you got blood all over it"
>hurryithinkimdyinghere.exe

[Anonymous No.3748460]

>>3748455
You just made my day! thank you : )

[Anonymous No.3748466]

>>3748280
Her screaming just makes me...really..scared, and sad

[Anonymous No.3748467]

I cut off my penis while peeling potatoes.

Am enjoying life as a girl. It was meant to be.

[Anonymous No.3748470]

>>3745762

Jesus, OP.

Anyway, I'd say the worst injury I sustained was because of my idiot roommate

>walk into kitchen
>"hey whats up, herpina?"
>"oh nm deep frying stuff, can you check to see if the oil's hot enough"
>"ok"
>go to pot he had full of oil; it was hot enough for deep frying
>"ok sweet"
>comes over and drops an entire FROZEN chicken into the thing
>thisiswhywecanthavenicethings.jpg

I lifted my arms to defend myself and backed away (pushing my roomie away in the process) enough so the oil only burned the skin on the side of my arm. Fucking felt like it was falling off.

In retrospect I didn't like him that much anyway... should've just sprinted out of the kitchen.

[Anonymous No.3748474]

>>3748455
>2012
>not pulling out spit immediately after impact and stabbing your father after he opens his mouth

But seriously, that sucks I did that once, except it was a parring knife that slipped off the counter

[Rootcellar4tehwin No.3748481]

>>3748470
Stuff like this is why I don't let anyone but I do the major cooking.

But you are lucky... that could have really sucked. Reminds me of another kitchen accident. Lets just say don't let you girlfriend fry bacon while your naked ass is within the splatter radius. Last time I try to seduce someone in the kitchen.
>justdontask.gif

[Anonymous No.3748484]

burnt all of my fingertips of my right hand after one of my roommates let the stove on. hurt like a mother for a couple of days

[Anonymous No.3748494]

>>3748470
>herpina
>thisiswhywecanthavenicethings.jpg

[Anonymous No.3749015]

[Anonymous No.3749027]

>get up in the morning
>raging boner that won't go away
>ignore it, go cook breakfast
>penisheadonhotpanedge.jpg

It didn't actually hurt more than a burn elsewhere but fuck did I panic. Took two weeks to scab and heal, about a month to be barely visible.

[Anonymous No.3749045]

I was boiling turkey giblets for gravy one Thanksgiving, and managed to knock the boiling innards onto the floor and all over my foot. The blisters didn't fade for weeks, I couldn't even sleep with my foot under the covers it burned so bad.

[Anonymous No.3749049]

Countless cuts from knives (funnily enough none from actually cooking, just not knowing where knives were), half of the time not realizing I was bleeding until my arm was drenched, but regarding lasting damage, recently got a pretty bad second degree burn on my arm due to a shitty oven mitt.

[Anonymous No.3749060]

>>3748494

[Anonymous No.3749069]

I had a pot of boiling base (milk, sauteed onions, tons of corn) for a corn chowder and poured the mixture into a blender to puree it. Didn't realize the blender was set on fucking "pulse" so the instant I started it fucking boiling hot corn puree was all over my hands. Luckily I only had a bit of light burns but it hurt like a bitch.

[Anonymous No.3749101]

>>3748307
hold towel in hand
hold halved avacado in towel
tap pit with knife, twist and remove
and dont cut yourself you fuckhead

[Anonymous No.3749102]

>>3749069
Blenders don't come with lids anymore?

Invest in a burr mixer (aka hand-held blender). Enjoy the rest of your life.

[Anonymous No.3749119]

I was replacing an industrial blender blade with a brand new, laser-sharpened blade and my hand slipped. It sliced my palm to the bone all the way from just below my pointer finger to the opposite end just above my wrist, it bled like crazy all over the place and I had to go to the emergency room to get stitches and it took over 30 shots of lidocaine to stop the bleeding.

[Anonymous No.3749210]

>>3749119
Gaaargh.....I feel your pain. Did the same thing, not quite as bad, but bad enough that it bled for fucking ever and had to get stitches. What really sucks is that there's so much scar tissue underneath my skin now, that every morning it feels like I have arthritis in my hand and I have to spend 10 minutes flexing it to get it to loosen up. Shit sucks, bro.

[Anonymous No.3749224]

>>3745762

Dumb ass that is what you get for trying to catch the knife.

[Anonymous No.3749295]

Got a burn mark on my arm from a year or two ago. It's only really visible when I'm tanned, strangely

[Anonymous No.3749329]

> that feel when you learn not to attempt to catch a falling knife
> no fear of damaging falling knives since I put some of those snazzy rubber kitchen mat/tiles on kitchen floor

Just move out of the way and pick it up after.

Best I've had was slicing into the area between my index and thumb with a knife when I worked in a butcher shop a few years back. ended up cutting in to my index finger's radial artery lengthwise about an inch. It wouldn't stop bleeding and the Butcher being an old tough motherfucker of an ex marine, put a piece of gauze on it and wrapped in with duct tape.

Bleeding stopped and he said "You ain't dead, get back to work."

I sanitized the knife in questions as well as sections of floor where there was blood, and got back to work. As punishment, I was made to stay after work and sanitized then entire shop. To top it off, he charged me for a roll of duct tape.

Fucking Vietnam Marines... man.

[Anonymous No.3749401]

A big wound on my wrist.
I was cutting vegetables with my headphones on.
My boyfriend said something and ofc i didn't hear it, so he came to me and tapped me on my shoulder..
I jumped up, screamed, felt like i got a heart attack and accidentally cut my hand with the huge kitchen knife..
He called an ambulance and i got the hand fixed very half assed...
There is a pretty big scar to remind my boyfriend and me - NEVER EVER scare me when i'm cooking and never wear headphones in the kitchen!

[Anonymous No.3749673]

>be an apprentice chef
>small cuts on fingers erry day
>the occasional 'blood spurting everywhere' cut
>become a knife sharpening wizard - can cut a hanging hair with my kitchen knife
>treat this unnerving edge with a whole new level of respect
>never get cut again

[Anonymous No.3749689]

3 WORDS

>peanut
>butter
>burns

Scarred for life, guys.
Never boil peanut butter!

[Anonymous No.3749690]

>>3749673
actually i did cut myself recently - after drunkenly showing a friend a new knife, i placed it loosely into its sheath then smacked the but of the handle to knock it into place.
the tip went thru the leather sheath and into my left hand. it surprised me more then it hurt.

[Anonymous No.3749949]

I once got a first-degree burn all over my left arm when a big sauce bubble burst while I was making spaghetti. Luckily, I heal pretty quickly, so I wasn't crippled for too long.

[Anonymous No.3749987]

>>3745762
>not simply putting pressure on the wound, bandaging it up, and letting it heal

Pussy.

[Anonymous No.3750006]

>>3748258

[Anonymous No.3750015]

>be cooking halloween dinner for parents and lil sis cus i'm home from culinary school
>Ask mom if she can slice some veggies up while i cook some beef
>reach over to grab salt to season beef with
>my mom looks over and screams "ROACH!" and swings her knife at where my hand is while i'm grabbing the salt
>mfw she cuts off the tip of my pinky
>mfw the roach was a fake roach my lil sister got at school and just randomly put on counter

Just a regular halloween my mom took me to the er and my sister still went trick or treating.

[Anonymous No.3750029]

i accidentally my entire penis in an applepeelercorerslicer

[Slime !hbZ6eR.pYA No.3750053]

I spilt hot tea all over myself. Didn't scar but there were blisters everywhere and I was in agony for a few weeks.

[Anonymous No.3750083]

Was cutting a watermelon into squares one day.
The watermelon cut back.

[Anonymous No.3750223]

>come home drunk
>make frozen pizza
>take a big ass cheese knife to cut it
>knife gets sauce all over it
>want to wipe it on my jeans
>somehow get the wrong angle
>cut deep in my leg instead
>blood everywhere
>continue cutting pizza
>take off my belt and wrap it around the wound with paper towels
>feel like some sort of survival expert
>eat pizza
>go to sleep
>don't give a fuck
I wonder why it didn't hurt on the next day. Still have a big scar from that, the cut was really deep.

[Anonymous No.3750311]

was an idiot and deserved it, not sure if I learnt my lesson though

[Anonymous No.3750335]

oven mitts dont give a fuck about super steam power

[Anonymous No.3750338]

>>3750335
It's so compelling to want to pop that.

[Anonymous No.3750339]

not the worst, but I have sliced my palm on a pizza crust. I have never been cut by fucking food.

[Anonymous No.3750345]

>>3750335
I WANT TO POP IT I NEED TO POP IT PLEASE POP IT

[Anonymous No.3750356]

who needs gurochan when you've got /ck/ and their glorious images~
Anywho, relevant information, I just about sliced the tip of my thumb clean off with our meat slicer (we make our own lunch meats).... Glorious scar and all that jazz.
I have no pictures to share :/

[Anonymous No.3750358]

>at university
>preheat oven
>open oven door
>oven door is smooth as shit
>hits the cupboard next to it and rebounds
>I'm wearing shorts
>sound of sizzling flesh
>pain
>looks something like >>3750335

[Anonymous No.3750367]

>>3750335
I got something like his blister except it was from my wrist to his elbow. Some bitch at the burger place i used to work at got ice from the ice machine after the non slip mats where pulled up to be washed again when she was told not to and spilled some ice and my ass did not see it and slipped and my arm fell onto the grill.

[Anonymous No.3750376]

>>3750367
Please tell me you sued or got compensation for your injury.

[Anonymous No.3750400]

>>3750376
Naw i was not going to sue til they fucking started to say i was high and slipped and fired my ass. FYI almost everyone working there was a fucking dopehead. So i got a lawyer and sued for unfair terminaton and unsafe working environment. Got like 5 grand out of it. Best Christmas present ever.

[Anonymous No.3750517]

>>3750335

[Anonymous No.3750854]

>>3748280
>nope.mp4

fuck that. being a chef s for sure not a dream if mine. used to be as a kid but then reality slapped me in the face.

[Anonymous No.3750892]

>>3750400
Wow... how shitty of them. Did they not have worker's comp that you could have gotten without suing which made them assume you would sue? They are paranoid fuckers if so.

[Anonymous No.3750937]

[noko No.3750948]

>>3750937
Go to a doctor: they will remove that, clean it, give you something to heal it. It will burst on its own and fester if you dont.

[Anonymous No.3750961]

>>3750948
american, can't afford to go to the doctor if I want to eat this month

[noko No.3750976]

You can go to the ER. That is exactly the stuff they do.

[Anonymous No.3750977]

>>3750976
The ER is even more expensive. You're looking at bare minimum probably $100-200+.

[Anonymous No.3750978]

>>3750961
Then...take drugs, pop it and clean it with hydrogen peroxide.

Or go to a doctor now, because waiting for it to get worse will more expensive.

[Anonymous No.3750982]

>>3750977

fucking bloodsuckers.

[Anonymous No.3750984]

This is sort of a long story.

>be in early teens and just discovering that I'm a decent cook
>at a friend's house with my two little sisters, two of their friends, her little brother, and one of his friends, all in all there were eight kids there (of whom the oldest was thirteen) and no adults
>I decide to make a big batch of cookies for everyone
>about halfway through, I open the fridge door and dislodge some baking trays and dishes which were sitting on top of the fridge
>manage to stop most of them from falling but a few slide over my head and a ceramic dish serving shatters
>everyone runs in to check out what fell
>>hey sorry about the dish, nothing else broke though, can someone bring in my shoes so I can sweep this up?
>everyone stands in the doorway silently and with expressions of equal disgust and terror

(cont)

[Anonymous No.3750989]

>>3750984
(cont)
>>um...I'll pay to replace the dish if you want...
>at this point the youngest in our group began screaming and pointing at the floor
>blood is gushing from my foot like a geyser, there's a pool all around me
>it doesn't hurt strangely, so I claim to be fine and wrap a dishrag around my foot, proceed to clean up with help from my friend
>in mopping up the blood and ceramic shards we find a tiny little piece absolutely soaked with blood which we assume was the bit that cut me
>my friend finally makes me elevate my foot when the rag is soaked through, my toes have lost all feeling, and I almost faint
>we realize at long last that we can't handle the situation
>I call my mother and am rushed to the hospital to get ten stitches and a blood transfusion

At the hospital, I discovered to my horror that when you get a numbing shot they actually insert the needle right into the wall of the cut. After they did this three times and I could still feel everything, the nurse said that I must have some sort of chemical immunity to the anesthetic they use and that if they gave me any more I might lose the foot. This was almost two decades ago and though my scar has faded almost entirely, my foot still hurts when I think about it too long. It's giving me hell right now.

[Anonymous No.3751004]

Slipped over next to a deep fryer and dipped my hand up to the wrist in it

[Anonymous No.3751135]

>>3750335
>>3750937

how do you fucking function with something like that on you?!

[Anonymous No.3751150]

a bit off topic:

if you wanna see how someone cuts his finger watch this video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XsQ3sGKM29Y

he tries to make a stunt with the balisong knife and as it is in the air it "touches" his finger and hurts the guy badly.
even in slow motion.

[Anonymous No.3751157]

>Be 12 years old
>deep frying tempura
>everything was delicious

Never had an accident in the kitchen.

[Anonymous No.3751185]

so i am in prison. waiting to get something to eat and there is like this white guy with red hair.
i look at him and say something like "how about i stab your shit?".
he does not show any reaction to eat so i am like "i will rape your butt".
next thing he does is he takes something from the kitchen and pours the deep frying fat all over my fucking face.
so i am like there screaming, everyone is watching and he says" None of you seem to understand. I'm not locked in here with you. You're locked in here with *ME*! ".

[Anonymous No.3751187]

>>3751185
>mfw i died

[Gelgoog Guy !!XOac6frt+Ny No.3751260]

>>3750937
Dude just go to the ER. They have programs in place to help you make payments on that kind of shit.