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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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File: 39 KB, 400x500, 2009-03-02-rachaelRayFHM5.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698800 No.3698800 [Reply] [Original]

Alright /ck/, you have to fuck one food network personality, but it can be whoever you want, however you want. Who do you pick?

I pick Rachel Ray, in the butt, with a gag in her mouth so I don't have to hear her terrifying voice. Maybe I'd take the gag out long enough to hear her say EVOO.

>> No.3698806

Lorraine Pascalle.

>> No.3698809

If I could put a bag over her head, Giadia. Dem tittys.

>> No.3698823

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=RtS2Ikk7A9I

>> No.3698833

Guy Fairy
With a Mack truck

>> No.3698839
File: 21 KB, 240x323, Lorraine-Pascale-LP.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698839

I dunno what Food Network is, but I'll still say Lorraine Pascal - she must be on there.

>> No.3698846

Giada

>> No.3698847
File: 93 KB, 750x1057, dahl.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698847

>>3698839

Or Sophie Dahl. Is she on The Food Network?

>> No.3698859
File: 7 KB, 240x204, image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698859

rachell allen

>> No.3698873
File: 6 KB, 205x246, images.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698873

>>3698859
oo ooo forgot to say what i would like her to do.

I'd like her to give me a handjob without acknowledging me whilst she talks through the process in that slightly awkward way she presents her cookery programmes. then i'd like her to taste my cum with her finger like she would would taste a sauce for seasoning...and then to say "mmm delicious...yeah. im happy with that"

then just walk off

>> No.3698874
File: 37 KB, 720x513, 534332_431322053566937_875931333_n.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698874

>pic related

Violently to death.

>> No.3698879
File: 79 KB, 594x396, Chef+Ainsley+Harriot+Promotes+Cookbook+Melbourne+X8hqiHSYgOUl.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698879

Tee hee.

>> No.3698899

Pretty much all of them except Paula Deen. If I had to pick one, I'd go with Ray. Loving sex in the missionary position. We'd cuddle afterwards.

Barefoot Contessa - ANAL OH YEAH
Anne Burrell - She takes control, forcing me to orally pleasure her. MILF, young man fantasy lived out.
Giada - She blows me and I cum all over her face. Then I tell her to GTFO.

>> No.3698921

I wanna cum directly into giada's eyes and on her teeth while she smiles at me intensely

>> No.3698925
File: 38 KB, 468x614, nigella-lawson-09.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698925

Without a doubt, Nigella. I'd fuck her in the ass doggystyle while grabbing dem titties while she is bent over frying us some eggs and bacon. I'd shoot my load over her plate of eggs when they're done, then we'd both sit down and enjoy a quiet breakfast.

>> No.3698929

you guys are totally cheating (posting people from places that aren't food network)

>> No.3698930
File: 48 KB, 500x714, nigella_lawson_2775812.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698930

>>3698925

Nah. She looks more and more like her dad every day. And she's a bit of a hambeast.

She got over her old man dying pretty sharpish as well, mind. I'd be worried she was going to eat me and claim the insurance.

>> No.3698935

>>3698925
>>3698930

What show/network is she from? Those are some huge tits.

>> No.3698940
File: 20 KB, 320x310, giada.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698940

>>3698929

prolly cos nobody knows what food network is. who's this giada whore anyway? I'm guessing from her surname that she's related to Dino DiLaurentiis, but she still looks quite doable to me.

>> No.3698944

>>3698930
i think she's lost some weight, and that picture is unflattering to say the least. and any respectable cook should be a little chubby, i don't trust skinny cooks. and this is all besides the point......dem titties.

>> No.3698949
File: 424 KB, 1000x1325, sophie_dahl_vogue.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698949

>>3698935

Loads of shows called "Nigella ......".

A certain type of middle-aged, middle-England man gets serious wood over her because she's always licking her fingers and whatnot.

Sophie Dahl is definitely where the action is these days if you're a bit of a chubby-chaser.

>> No.3698951
File: 14 KB, 300x220, Two Fat Ladies.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698951

I'll take the one on the left and you, anon, take the one on the right.

>> No.3698952

Bobby Flay or Deen.

>> No.3698954
File: 89 KB, 468x747, article-2121923-126093E0000005DC-756_468x747.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698954

>>3698930
no longer hambeast material, here's a current pic

>> No.3698958
File: 15 KB, 300x360, nigel_lawson.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698958

>>3698944

This is her dad - former Chancellor of the Exchequer (or something), Nigel Lawson. Now tell me she doesn't look like him, and that even if you ever did get to do her, halfway through you'd be thinking "jesus, how did I end up in bed with the Chancellor?"

Now you'll see this face when you fap to Nigella (a name which translates to "oops, we wanted a boy lol".

>> No.3698964
File: 17 KB, 480x360, AartiSequeira.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698964

Aarti Sequeira

Also, this crazy bitch, http://www.foodnetwork.com/marcela-valladolid/index.html

I would make them cook food in the nude.

>> No.3698973

>>3698958
I don't see the resemblance. Unless the ex-chancellor has tits the size of bowling balls, there is no resemblance.

>> No.3698984
File: 4 KB, 150x180, nigel_lawson_budget150.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698984

>>3698973

Stop looking at her norks, and clock her mush: she's a dead ringer for him.

Besides, when pater was powerful and fat, he probably had a fair set of churns on him.

>> No.3698990

>>3698984
pip pip cherrio. bubble and squeek. Toad the wet Sprocket

>> No.3698991
File: 273 KB, 1600x1072, giada_de_laurentiis_8_jpg.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3698991

fuck the haters

>> No.3698994

>>3698964
holy shit holy shit holy shit

>india

Oh.

>> No.3698995

>>3698940
>>3698991
So much this. Fucking perfect teeth and looks like a mouse. Probably a furfag but whatever.

>> No.3698997

Rape: Giada De Laurentiis
Marry: Sophia Dahl
Kill: Rachael Ray

>> No.3699009

>>3698991
I always thought Giada looked like an old Natalie Portman.


I'd cum on her face and tell her to make me dinner.

>> No.3699027

>>3698991
This is the only woman on there that is even remotely attractive.

>> No.3699060

>>3699027
Nigella is gorgeous, Giada doesn't come close to her. I don't know if Nigella counts because I don't think she has a show on Food Network at the moment. There's a lot of Euro/American confusion in this thread.

>> No.3699072

>>3699060
Nigella is a fucking whale.

>> No.3699082
File: 134 KB, 656x648, toohottamales.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699082

I always liked this blonde one circa 1995. Since I was 16 I would do her awkwardly and it would be over in 2 minutes. I would then make the other one smell my paynus.

>> No.3699089
File: 189 KB, 345x337, necky.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699089

>>3699072
mkay, dude.

>> No.3699095

>>3699082
you know that they used to be "together" and don't give a shit about paynus

>> No.3699105
File: 42 KB, 500x443, giada.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699105

giada in the butt

>> No.3699106

>>3699105

>exit only

Anal sex is disgusting. You should kill yourself.

>> No.3699120

>>3699106
You should properly
>preparyouranus.jpeg

>> No.3699136

I don't get Giada, I don't find her attractive. She looks like every other skinny whore that gets drunk at clubs on a Friday.
Rachel Ray is indeed hot, but her personality is sort of a turnoff. She acts like shes fucking stupid. Still, I'd definitely bang.
Sophie Dahl....yep, Hot as fuck.
Nigella wins for me. She's not obnoxious, she's full figured, and seems like she'd be nice.

>> No.3699138

>>3699136
>full figured
>not fat

>> No.3699140

>>3699136
This.

>> No.3699146

the only correct answer is:
i want to be dominated by chef ramsay.

userHo tbis

>> No.3699168
File: 125 KB, 817x1222, 11mgbo6.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699168

Her tits look like something I've seen in an ugly tits thread on >>>/b/

>> No.3699188

Giada in a rape fantasy with bondage. I'd tie her up in a doggy style position and fuck her from behind while jaming a carrot up her ass.

2nd choice would be a younger Rachael Ray.

>> No.3699210

>Not using EVOO as lube.
What's wrong with you OP?

>> No.3699218
File: 22 KB, 300x429, giada_de_laurentiis_2570836.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699218

Giada is ass ugly. Her eyes are too close together and she's always got that stupid toothy grin that makes her look like she just unleashed a wet runny fart. She has beady mouse eyes too. All other girls posted here are pleasing to my palate.

>> No.3699240
File: 20 KB, 490x360, giada.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699240

She has lip wrinkles and on 2 separate occasions she has said that she asks her butcher to removing sausage from the casing. If you can not take 2 sec to squeeze the meat out of a tubesteak you have no business cooking. Fucking cunt I hate her more than RR but slightly less than Sandra Lee or whatever that whores name is.

>> No.3699243

>>3699146
Yes!!

>> No.3699248

Every heterosexual male in this thread would fuck Giada if she was sprawled naked on a bed, wet and ready. You are all fucking liars.

>> No.3699257
File: 54 KB, 453x610, deen.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699257

>>3699248

Dude, I'd probably fuck YOU if you were naked on a bed, so that doesn't prove a damn thing, other than most people on 4chan are randy bastards. And yes, I would totally do that Giada one. And the fat Nigella. I wouldn't mind having Paula Deen suck me off either.

>> No.3699261

No one says Cat Cora? What the fuuuuck.

>> No.3699265

>>3699257

>suck me off

I laughed that you switched "fucking" to "sucking".

Wise decision.

BUTTERY'ALL

>> No.3699305

>nobody saying claire robinson

>> No.3699314
File: 5 KB, 160x213, altonbrown.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699314

I pick Alton

we'd do whatever he wanted to do

>> No.3699317

>>3699261
Clearly a lesbian.

>> No.3699318

>>3699305
I bet she sucks a mean dick

>> No.3699322

>>3698800
Does The Cooking Channel count?

I dig the Azn chick on Easy Chinese. Forget her name though.

>> No.3699331

That bitch that cooks the french food.

>> No.3699335

>>3699318
I have a little bit of a crush on her, like I would given the chance court her in an attempt to form a lasting relationship.

>> No.3699340

>>3698951
at least these two can cook

>> No.3699342

>>3699340

The one on the left (I think she may be dead now) used to be pretty fine when she was young. Maybe even a model or summink, I dunno.

>> No.3699343
File: 104 KB, 375x430, lauracalder.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699343

>>3699331
Laura Calder.

Them titties.

>> No.3699345
File: 51 KB, 266x354, sunny.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699345

sunny anderson.
surprised no one has said her already.

>> No.3699346

>>3699345

>people on 4chan liking niggers

Yeah, no.

>> No.3699350

>>3699346
sucks to be you

>> No.3699351
File: 98 KB, 680x962, Padma Lakshmi-0133.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699351

Is Padma Lakshmi on Food Network? I'd do her, even though Salman Rushdie's already been up it.

>> No.3699352

>>3699345
I like my women a little...ahem....paler.

>> No.3699356

>>3699351

>spoiled goods

I don't fuck women that have had children, either.

>> No.3699357

>>3699356
your standards are tooo high faggot

>> No.3699359

>>3699356
Usually, they are the best lay.

>> No.3699378
File: 253 KB, 600x520, laura_photo.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699378

my love

>> No.3699388
File: 24 KB, 320x421, dswst5osz518zs1t.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699388

MASAHARU MORIMOTO

>> No.3699400
File: 70 KB, 500x467, ramsay.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699400

yes please

>> No.3699433

>>3699305

Would totally bang her.

>> No.3699476

>>3699343
Tried to Xray

Spoiler: I failed

>> No.3699479
File: 109 KB, 375x430, Cook.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699479

>>3699343

>> No.3699486
File: 13 KB, 140x130, lorraine_p.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699486

>>3699322
no way dude.

Lorraine Pascale hands down

>> No.3699488

Emily Ellyn from this season of Food Network Star.
I'll dress like Bettie Page if she wants :3

>> No.3699535
File: 30 KB, 550x323, claire.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699535

>>3699433
>>3699335
>>3699318
>>3699305

>> No.3699579
File: 30 KB, 260x200, lorraine_pascale_1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699579

You know she gives good head, just by looking at her.

>> No.3699591
File: 80 KB, 267x398, 1283220830273.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699591

Nigella's on the Cooking Channel, and I want to make her cum all over my dick.

>> No.3699597
File: 18 KB, 200x199, 1338353862848.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699597

>>3699486
>>3699579

>black

>> No.3699602
File: 10 KB, 258x195, sexy.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699602

>>3699591
Man the harpoons!

>> No.3699608
File: 64 KB, 375x500, 2300722450_179c654b9b.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699608

Ah Sakai-san~~~~

>> No.3699612
File: 15 KB, 460x276, tumblr_lyjmheJNXt1r1uuioo1_500.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699612

>>3699597
>mfw you don't know what you're missing.

also dat accent. hngggg

>> No.3699615
File: 5 KB, 274x242, 1309366729448.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699615

>>3699612
>mfw you don't know what I've already got.

>> No.3699621

>>3699615

Your right hand?

>> No.3699622

>>3699621
ur mom nerd lmao

>> No.3699626
File: 29 KB, 301x375, lorraine pascale.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699626

this thread is now about the gorgeous all-encompassing beauty that is Lorraine Pascale

>> No.3699629
File: 29 KB, 450x300, Lorraine-Pascale.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699629

>>3699626

sure, why not?

>> No.3699630
File: 12 KB, 295x404, Lorraine_Pascale_19.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699630

this is everything i want in a woman

>> No.3699639
File: 20 KB, 427x285, jamie before the downturn.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699639

>>3699388
just to say I did

or Jamie Oliver before he lost all of his good looks.

Other options are Laura Calder and/or Claire whatshernuts

>> No.3699643

Everyone else is Maggie Beer compared to Nigella Lawson.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=RtS2Ikk7A9I

>> No.3699647

>>3699261
a lesbian and in a happy relationship

too many lines for me to cross

if I was a chick though...

>> No.3699648
File: 185 KB, 406x650, Nadia.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699648

Nadia G, 10 times, and she has to change outfits before every fucking.

>> No.3699652

>>3699648
butt chin
butt chin
>butt chin

>> No.3699671
File: 45 KB, 425x295, 1307893731139.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699671

>>3699639
Now he's just a pathetic skinnyfat who preaches about healthy eating. What a fucking hypocrite.

>> No.3699672

>>3699671
I think something else went down too, his face is fucking brutal these days

>> No.3699686

In order:
1. Claire Robinson
2. Nadia G
3. Laura Calder
4. Ching-He Huang
5. Anne Burrell, I guarantee you she is crazy in bed

>> No.3699697
File: 14 KB, 208x208, 1331888636449.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699697

>>3698964
>Aarti
hey! that's my woman!

>> No.3699931

NIGELLA LAWSON

>> No.3699943
File: 18 KB, 220x288, 220px-CurtisStone.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3699943

was he ever on the food network? i would have delicious gay sex with him

>> No.3699946

Anthony Bourdain and the Barefoot Contessa. It'd be a hippy drug party.

>> No.3699953

>>3699946
and Paula Deen, gettin' kinky in hurrr

>> No.3699963

>>3699639
Chef Morimoto is a symmetrical god.

>> No.3699980

>>3699602
dat ASS

mmmm

>> No.3700156

Alton Brown and Anthony Bourdain threesome

>> No.3700350
File: 198 KB, 503x480, paula deen.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3700350

Idk, Paula Deen probably gives great head.

I'll just butter up my dick first.

>> No.3700352
File: 85 KB, 1238x934, Marcela-Valladolid-.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3700352

ITT: fail

>> No.3700356
File: 21 KB, 346x461, marcela_mexican_made_easy_0318_article.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3700356

>> No.3700357
File: 690 KB, 799x1198, marcela.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3700357

>> No.3700358
File: 182 KB, 1365x2048, Marcela-Valladolid.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3700358

>> No.3700359
File: 75 KB, 960x638, 301047_10150440917937652_427497822_n.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3700359

i love her accent, it makes my dick smile.

>> No.3700360
File: 38 KB, 640x960, 409323_10150590617292652_904731983_n.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3700360

>> No.3700361
File: 47 KB, 720x480, 308768_10150425457022652_255831947_n.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3700361

>> No.3700367

Rachel Ray would have a great blowjob face and orgasm face and Paula Dean would be great at giving one.

>> No.3700391

Rachael Ray in a threesome with another guy. We would fingercuff her, switching off occasionally. It would end with bukkaki.

>> No.3700432

Kelsey Nixon. Dem eyes.

>> No.3700436

>>3700432
And Aida Mollencamp.

>> No.3700487

>>3700361

Who is in the red?

>> No.3700576
File: 173 KB, 960x1200, tina_nordstrom.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3700576

She also has a fuckin' sexy knife.

>> No.3700923

>>3698800
>Giada De Laurentiis
Without a fucking doubt.