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/ck/ - Food & Cooking


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21124053 No.21124053 [Reply] [Original]

All of his recipes suck dick

>> No.21124057

>>21124053
i think you're adding ingredients you don't need

>> No.21124059

>>21124053
who

>> No.21124060

>>21124053
he lives in san francisco

>> No.21124064

>>21124059
John Mitzewich aka Chef John

>> No.21124075

>>21124053
you probably forgot the cayenne, you dingus

>> No.21124088

he's not a particularly good cook, but most of his recipes are at least decent.

>> No.21124127

>>21124053
>All of his recipes suck dick
then you've got that in common
>>21124088
most people on this board are better cooks than him and all his views and the money he made off youtube should've been ours

>> No.21124130

>>21124053
His recipes are good. I use plenty of them. I just hate how allrecipes removed the metric conversion button.

>> No.21124152

>>21124053
forgot the cayenne again?

>> No.21124159

>>21124053
Sounds like someone isn't the boss of his salad toss

>> No.21124160

>>21124053
OP is the Horatio of horse fellatio

>> No.21124181

>>21124053
You are after all the Diane Abbott, of why OP is always a faggot.

>> No.21124193

His video format is nice because it doesn't skip anything but it also doesn't have any extra meme bullshit taking up time. There are better chefs on youtube though.

>> No.21124201

After all you are the Glen Close of your /ck/ shitpost.

>> No.21124271

>>21124053
*Chef John tries to cook anything remotely ethnic

>> No.21124273

>>21124088
He is not a great chef but he is great at showing you how to cook especially if you have no experience

>> No.21124276

>>21124193
He literally Skips everything that's why the videos are great I don't need to watch someone chop an onion

>> No.21124288

>>21124053
Nobody knows who that is dumbass

>> No.21124297

>>21124288
everyone knows who that is you shithead

>> No.21124362

>>21124053
All of his shit slaps
as a little pick me up on a humpday wednesday
put this on .5 speed, sit back and prepare to laugh
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PHRq-SRA1s

>> No.21124368

His inflection makes me want to kill myself

>> No.21124454

>>21124127
I'm pretty sure /ck/ is the board with the least skilled anons when it comes to cooking. Most are just fast food experts.

>> No.21124465

>>21124053
Chef John has fallen
Billions must cook

>> No.21124477

>>21124053
>Uses strangely lit picture to deliberately appear of ethnic decent to get more clicks on the internet
why are they like this?

>> No.21124484

>>21124053
Other pootubers always mention him as an inspiration and I still haven't watched one of his videos

>> No.21124489
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21124489

>>21124454
I'm pretty sure you don't know wtf you talking about

>> No.21124504

>>21124053
wrong
>>21124059
Chef (Captain) John. Former Army Ranger that was court martialed for war crimes in Grenada and now makes youtube videos

>> No.21124528

>>21124053
Name one recipe of his you’ve actually attempted.

>> No.21124532

>>21124528
HIs ciderbraised pork shoulder was great. Peposo too. Pad KRapow as well. Hunter's Stew amazing.

>> No.21124535

>>21124053
>old school youtube style
>no unnecessary stuff
>no hectic cuts
>not showing his face just food
>simple recipes
>motivating
He's based and a great source if you want to learn cooking.

>> No.21124540
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21124540

>> No.21124570

>>21124528
I've done a few.
His pasta amatriciana and chicken lazone were good.

>> No.21124576

>>21124540
based Chef John

>> No.21124582

>>21124535
>no 5 minute story about his grandmother, maybe a 20 sec intro tops
>nice close up shots of what he's doing
>includes mistake in hist videos and points them out
>versatile recipes
Chef John is great, anyone who disagrees is gay and homosexual.

>> No.21124592

>>21124532
>ciderbraised pork shoulder
Thanks going to check that one out.

>> No.21124595

>>21124540
Is that real?

>> No.21124629
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21124629

Post his best recipes

>> No.21124644
File: 92 KB, 661x623, CayennePunch.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21124644

>>21124629
Off the top of my head

Tikka Masala
Sweet and Sour pork
Beef Goulash
Crisp peach Cobbler
BLT Pasta
Paella
Baked Mushroom risotto
Chicken Paprikash
Nashville Hot Chicken
Jamaican Brown Stew Chicken

I make all of these pretty regularly, can vouch for them all being fucking delicious. I especially like his Risotto for how foolproof it is, and his Nashville Hot chicken is goddamn insane.

>> No.21124675

>>21124059

same. i recognize his weird face but i didnt even know his thing was cooking. i thought he was some lame cheesy comedy guy or something from his looks.

>> No.21124680

>>21124127
Most people on this board are less skilled entertainers than he is. Yeah, his recipes are only okay-good, but he manages to sell them well.

>> No.21124895

>>21124644
>why I lube Ragusea's mouth and not his asshole

>> No.21125029

>>21124053
All his recipes are basic, noob-friendly approaches that you can recommend to a beginner in order to get an acceptable product out, or use as a rough template for your own in something you're not as familiar with. It is easy to do better, but I still recommend him to cooklets without hesitation.

>> No.21125047

>>21124053

>> No.21125050

>>21124053
he just provides basic recipes for popular dishes. If you can't make the recipe taste good that sounds like you need more experience... and maybe some cayenne

>> No.21125055

>>21124160
lol

>> No.21125057

>>21124629
his stovetop stuffing was a huge hit over thanksgiving. needed maybe 1/2 cup more broth, but still very good.

>> No.21125067
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21125067

>>21124201
This got me. Good job Anon.

>> No.21125079

>>21124528
I use his risotto recipe whenever i make it. It’s easy and gets the job done.

>> No.21125119

>>21124064
I’ve seen this image many time and always thought it was Gorilla Monsoon.

>> No.21125150
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21125150

Chef John the bell curve meme of cooking.

If you're a total cooklet, he's the best because all of his recipes are simple and rarely require more than basic kitchen stuff. He will give you the culinary school instruction (his job before YouTube) in a simple and digestible way. You probably need to breath manually if you can't make great food from his stuff even as a beginner.

If you're the midwit cook (/ck/) then you probably think he sucks because only the best tuition is worth your gastronomical prowess. Since you've been forged by the heat of the kitchen and chef's life for YEARS (over 1), you will only be sated with high-intellect content from Marco Pierre White, foreign zoomtubers who travels to indigenous "ethnic" places, or "authentic" chefs because only a 100% Japanese from Jiro Prefecture, Nihon, could truly tell you the correct way to put egg on rice. In truth, you need these "expert mode" recipes because while you've reached the skill to follow them, you're far from making your own.

If your the jedi cook master he's the best because you mainly just want a straight to the point basic and credible recipe because you have your own whole plan on it based on whatever the fuck is in the pantry/garden that night. I don't know any chef (let a lone youtuber-youtuber cook) that has such good and quick "base" recipes and tutorials. That's not even to mention the volume he's got.

>> No.21125156
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21125156

>>21124540
>>21124576
>>21124595
He definitely lurks here.

>> No.21125272

>>21124053
Every single poultry recipe he's done was a banger, I've done every single one (that isn't a turkey/goose)
Not a huge fan of his deserts
>>21125150
MPW's Knorr recipes are actually really good. Simple, short, delicious.

>> No.21125338

>>21125272
Love knorr, I buy a ton of their "professional" concentrate online and it lasts me years for soups, seasoning, sauces, etc. Doesn't need to be fridged/frozen either which is great even if it wasn't already a space saver since a bottle makes like 100 cans of chicken broth

>> No.21125475

>>21124053
I noticed he finally shut the fuck up on social media. That's right, bitch....shut the fuck up and make some bang bang chicken nuggets.

>> No.21125477
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21125477

>>21124895
>That one pasta of John sodomizing Raguesa

>> No.21125494

>>21125338
I don't even use Knorr, just the generic store brand stuff
The lamb hotpot recipe is absolute killer

>> No.21125496

>>21124276
>I don't need to watch someone chop an onion
This is the most annoying part of cooking videos. I know how to do basic ingredient prep, and if I didn't, then I'd watch a "how to dice an onion" (or whatever) video.
Whenever I do watch cooking videos now, often times I have to skip through most of it. At that point I feel like I would have been better off just reading a few written recipes.
So yeah, Chef John's videos are quality and I appreciate that aspect of them.

>> No.21126190

>>21124528
His chicken wings recipe which said to use baking powder as a dry rub with cumin as one of the seasonings.

It was disgusting.

>> No.21126221

>>21126190
Filtered. Why don’t you just stick with chicken tendies, little guy?

>> No.21126226

>>21125494
It's mostly the same shit anyway, but funnily they don't put MSG in the British ones

>> No.21126232

>>21124059
mean gene okerlund

>> No.21126235

>>21126221
I used jacque pepin's recipe instead and it was fucking great on the other hand.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PKoKxclGlx4

>> No.21126243

>>21124053
after all you're the Mr. Beast of your baking yeast

>> No.21126249

>>21124454
>tourist fell for the meme

>> No.21126486

>>21124528
Pasta alla genovese
Italian white bean and sausage stew
Beef, bean and beer chili
Baked ziti
Homemade pesto
Spaghetti aglio e olio
Grilled greek chicken
Pork tenderloin diablo
Sourdough bread (including how to make your own starter)
Croissants
French toasts
Crêpes
Macaroni and cheese
Khachapuri

There's probably other recipes of his I'm forgotting. They all slapped except for khachapuri but it was 100% my fault for using a garbage blend of cheeses that ended up melting weird.
Also the first 3 recipes are just part of my rotation now. His pasta alla genovese is my absolute favorite thing to eat.

>> No.21126489

>>21124454
Then you should go into more cook-along threads, some genuinely good stuff. I got more than one recipe/dish idea from here.

>> No.21126527

>>21124053
https://youtu.be/-4oSpciE5ow

>> No.21126541

>>21124053
>Helloooooo this is Chef Wishes from FoodJohn.com wiiiiiiiiiiiiith hot pepper on peepee. That's right all you're gonna do is give the ol' shakka shakka of the cayenne right on your penis. It's that easy. Use as little or as much as you want, but I tend to eyeball it. After all you are the ancient Hawaiian tiki of your spicy volcanoe peepee.

>> No.21126543

>>21126541
heh

>> No.21126549

>>21124528
Chocolate Chip Cookies!
Bacorn
Fondant potatoes
I'm sure there are others but I can't think of them at the moment.
Also OP is clearly the Sean Bass of taking cock in the ass.

>> No.21126565

Interesting how Chef John threads are allowed but ones about MPW don’t last 10 seconds on the board.

>> No.21126586

I call your mum Oliver Recipes cuz Oliver Recipes suck dick.

>> No.21126628

>>21126586
I call your mum Steve. Because she's a bloke

>> No.21126660

>>21126235
pepin really should give it a rest

>> No.21126664

>>21124528
Cottage fries

>> No.21126667

>>21126489
There are 150 slop threads for every cook along thread though

>> No.21126885

>>21126565
Who's fault could this be?

>> No.21127374

>>21124060
>remember not to buy your food the same place you buy your motor oil, and be sure to save money with your backyard spice garden