Indian food

[Anonymous No.19404911]

I've never tasted bad Indian food. How do they do it?

[Anonymous No.19405040]

>seasoned with pop particles

[Anonymous No.19405057]

Indians smell bad because the intricacies of deodorant escape them, and they bathe in cow piss. Their overseasoned food smells bad. Every bastard Hindoo or poo-njab I encounter is either an arrogant cunt, a rapist, or a stingy bastard. Somehow pakis are even worse. I wouldn't eat Indian food at gunpoint, much less voluntarily pay for what is less appealing than literal SHIT.

[Anonymous No.19405170]

>>19404911
Lots and lots of butter but even so i agree indian food is doink.

[Anonymous No.19405189]

they make indian food like this.

[Anonymous No.19405190]

I've never tasted good Indian food. How do they do it?

[Anonymous No.19405220]

>>19405189
Ok the guy lost the arm but is the armpit the best place to crack an egg? Fancy chefs do it with one hand anyway.

[Anonymous No.19405228]

>>19405189
I used to love eating out at indian places, but after seeing too many webms like this, I can't anymore. Are Indian restaurants in the first world hygenic? I assume most of the cooks are mexican anyway..

[Anonymous No.19405232]

>>19405228
No they aren't, it's known that they don't wash their hands and do all sorts of nasty things to cut on cost.

[Anonymous No.19405234]

>>19405057
we run the world

[Anonymous No.19405235]

>>19405228
>I used to love eating out at indian places
>Are Indian restaurants in the first world hygenic
i have some bad news for you anon

[Anonymous No.19405240]

>>19405234
>we give the world the runs
yee

[Anonymous No.19405550]

>>19404911
Real answer? The sheer amount of ghee and heavy cream they use for most dishes that white people order. You can make it at home and have more or less the same flavour profile, but it won't taste the same as restaurant curries if you don't use a fuckton of ghee and cream for stuff like butter chicken or tikka masala. Same exact reason why Chinese food always tastes better from a restaurant than cooked at home unless you're making something like steamed dumplings.

[Anonymous No.19405605]

>>19404911
The heat of the spices cook the feces

[Anonymous No.19405625]

>>19404911
sloppa with lots of spices, hard to mess up

[Anonymous No.19405638]

SOVL

[Anonymous No.19405644]

>>19404911
I started cooking Indian because I had had so much BAD Indian food. I've learned how to cook plenty of things because what the restaurants were serving was not very good or bad, but bad Indian food is the absolute worst.

[Anonymous No.19405699]

>>19405228
my favorite indian restaurant was shut down by the health inspectors, they got like a 40/100 on their inspection and then a 59 on their "redo." also should mention i literally got food poisoning there once. their food was so good though

[Anonymous No.19406010]

The only "bad" Indian food I've had came from lunch buffets. If you order off the menu even at a mediocre place it's typically going to be pretty good. At least at your typical North Indian place.

[Anonymous No.19406197]

[Anonymous No.19406251]

They set it up like a Chinese takeout, they all cook with the same basic formula that they know westerners like (including generous amount of butter, sugar, & MSG).

[Anonymous No.19406255]

>>19405189
>Virgin walk on top of the dough
>Chad armpit egg crack

[Anonymous No.19406359]

>>19405550
I always get Vindaloo
Tikka Masala is literally british food

[Anonymous No.19406363]

>>19406251
I have indian friends, the food tastes identical.

[Anonymous No.19406368]

>>19405235
it gets worse, way worse, if they're like muslims, they don't jus "accidentally whpes ass with hand" they do it out of tradition, they wash their hands afterwards, but they really do whpe their ass with their left hand (if they usually do everythin with the right), crazy world

[Anonymous No.19406414]

>>19406359
>Tikka Masala is literally british food
So is any vindaloo you'll find in a takeaway.

[Anonymous No.19406426]

>>19405228
i've never got food poisoning from an actual indian place but i DID get some pretty gnarly food poisoning from taco papi in las vegas, which was ran by indians. That had me stuck in my hotel room for almost 2 solid days, i could barely make it downstairs to have a smoke and get drinks
i also recently went to a pizza place in daytona beach ran by indians at like 2 am - the pizza looked like it had cat food on it and tasted like trash and i ate it anyway and was on the toilet for a day

[Anonymous No.19406445]

>>19406414
You're wrong though.

[Anonymous No.19406447]

>>19406426
>went to a korean fried chicken place
>it had raving reviews
>place was full of indians standing around in the corner
>food was delicious

[Anonymous No.19406449]

>>19405220
>>19406255
>egg
Looks like he's pressing some kind of dough

[Anonymous No.19406459]

>>19406426
>a pizza place in daytona beach
Oh fuck, I live in Daytona. Where was this? Also next time you're here, try Lenny's Pizza instead.

[Anonymous No.19406474]

>>19406426
IME "cloth tablecloth" Indian restaurants take their shit pretty seriously, I've never once gotten sick from eating in one. Usually the "greasy spoon for delivery/takeaway only" curry places are the ones that will give you the shits, and it's because they precook their meat and gravy days and days before they ever use it, probably not refrigerating it properly.

[Anonymous No.19406477]

>>19405550
Bullshit. I make indian food at home that tastes better than from a restaurant, same with chinese and middle eastern food. We have the recipes. It's not a secret. Sink the ships.

[Anonymous No.19407619]

>>19405644
what did you start with and what would you recommend a beginner cooking indian food?

[Anonymous No.19407870]

I could eat lentils and rice forever

[Anonymous No.19407877]

>>19404911
Oldest culture on the planet anon makes yt "boys" seeth cause they immune systems are to weak to handle the pajeet particals

[Anonymous No.19407882]

I eat Injun food weekly and it's almost always good and sometimes great. TWICE I've had a bad experience. Worst was 72hr food poisoning that had me so dehydrated I was having nightmares about water, and I was puking up thick strands of stomach lining for maybe 16 hours. Second was a vindaloo that must have been prepared by Exxon >:|

[Anonymous No.19407886]

>>19407882
thank God I hallucinate all the time from alcohol induced dehydration. Ive been preparing for food poisoning.

[Anonymous No.19407890]

>>19407886
the loosinations are by far not the worst part of food poisoning anon. the constant vomiting and nausea and retching can get to the point of breaking ribs. It was 5 fucking days before I could stomach a warm meal after that, and maybe 4 years before I could smell a curry cooking from down the street without needing to shit my pants

[Anonymous No.19407897]

>>19404911
I agree anon, I don't think I've ever had especially bad Indian. I've had oily curries, stingy curries (low meat), curries with average cuts of meat but it's all tasted good otherwise. My only issue with Indian is in Australia it's weirdly expensive, much worse value than a pizza or the like, plus places have taken to asking upwards of 6 dollars for some rice. It's very hard to spend less than 30-35 dollarydoos by the time you get rice and some garlic naan. These days I just make my own rice to save on cost.
On the other hand I've had plenty of shit SE Asian food, Chinese food, "Americana", Japanese, fish&chips etc.

>>19405228
I'd be much more hesitant to eat Indian in India but in countries with reasonable health codes you're as likely to be eating shit at the nearest maccas or KFC.

>>19405057
They smell like curry because the spices when cooking seep into their clothes, skin and hair. If you've ever made Indian you'll note you keep getting whiffs of it from your hair and any clothes you haven't washed for days after.

[Anonymous No.19407989]

>>19405234
So thats why everything is imploding.

[Anonymous No.19407994]

>>19405550
This guy knows. The secret ingredient for any recipe is usually butter and in retarded amounts.

[Anonymous No.19407996]

>>19407890
Based pants shitter

[Anonymous No.19408175]

>>19404911
I've never tasted good (or edible) Indian food, except starters. Any dishes you recommend?

[Anonymous No.19408401]

There is this Indian place near my house, the curry was actually fucking really spicy, like the spiciest thing I've ever eaten, but there was so much ginger in it that it tasted like how potpourri smelled

[Anonymous No.19408406]

>>19407890
The worst food poisoning I got came from eating curry at a place with good reviews. I was vomiting for like 3 days and had the shits for like 7 days. I should have gone to the hospital, I was hallucinating a lot of the time.

[Anonymous No.19409029]

>MULTIPLE anons recounting stories of food poisoning from indian food
Get what you deserve retards

[Anonymous No.19409049]

>>19408175
I've never had bad indian food.

[Anonymous No.19410047]

>>19405550
I make butter chicken easily as good as my favorite takeout. I just use sweet cream butter. A whole stick of it with a bit of coconut oil and then I add coconut milk. I've made ghee before and it's good but not enough where you can't get by without it.

[Anonymous No.19410407]

>>19406010
the purpose of curry slop has long been known to digsuise subpar quality meat.
>>19408406
this. you can't sleep and it feels like a dream but it's not.

[Anonymous No.19410415]

>>19407877
knowing you can't use your left hand because you wipe your ass with it but being too mentally retarded to remember right from left isn't "culture"

[Anonymous No.19410437]

>>19410407
I was also dehydrated as hell, it was a good thing my dad showed up at my place.

[Anonymous No.19410500]

>>19404911
Had it once, never again
>forced to go to Indian restaurant by women
>usually like foreign food, willing to give it a shot
>it's a "nice" restaurant but is almost empty on a Friday night
>takes over an hour for us to get our food
>girls keep creaming themselves over how good the naan is so I try it
>it's just shitty half-burned flatbread???
>finally get food
>ordered a lamb spinach dish or something
>it's a little copper pot of greenish-brown slop that looks like the chef's diarrhea
>almost no flavor, bland and dry meat
>takes another hour for us to get our bill
>that'll be $19 plus tip sirs
>poo lady stands over me and watches after giving me the tablet for the tip (I tipped nothing)
>shat my brains out a few hours later
What a fucking joke. Further proof that India is the armpit of the world. More shocking was how everyone I was with fawned over it like it was the best thing ever.
>b-b-but you should have gotten the butter chicken!
Well I didn't. The food was shit and I'm not wasting my money on it again.

[Anonymous No.19410738]

>>19410407
>i read a thing on 4chan a few years ago
>it has long been known

[Anonymous No.19410752]

>>19410738
it's literally in the fucking diaries of europeans when they arrived in hinduland

[Anonymous No.19410760]

>>19410500
Can't believe you would have the audacity to come on the internet and just lie