Urgent help needed

[Anonymous No.19255027]

I have absolutely zero cooking knowledge, and tomorrow I need to prepare a dinner for 4 people. They know that I don't know how to cook, and I want to prove them wrong.
What's a recipe I can learn that's really simple to make and that I can't possilbly fuck up, but looks really difficult to make. I really wanted to impress them, I need somethikng that'll knock their cocks off.

[Anonymous No.19255031]

>>19255027
*SOCKS

[Anonymous No.19255033]

>>19255027
Lasagna.

[Anonymous No.19255038]

>>19255027
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76JXtB7JFQY
ez pz recipe

[Anonymous No.19255050]

>>19255027
Unironically any type of stew/soup. You just chop shit up and boil it, impossible to screw up.

Something like https://www.cheaprecipeblog.com/2012/09/lentil-sausage-soup-recipe/

I would not recommend doing any type of frying pan cooking or meat cooking (outside of boiling) if you've never cooked before, you will 100% fuck it up.

[Anonymous No.19255068]

>>19255038
Agree with this, some form of pasta is the go-to answer but gumbo is even better

[Anonymous No.19255080]

>>19255027
Make a baked ziti
>Ziti
>Ricotta
>Tomato sauce
>Oregano
>Basil
>Shredded mozzarella
>Parmesan
>Red pepper flakes if you want heat
In a bowl mix the tomato sauce with ricotta herbs and a bit of mozzarella, season to taste with salt. Cook the ziti in salted water until just before al dente, drain and add to the cheese mixture, stir to combine. Add to a pan and top with mozzarella and parmesan, bake at 350 until cheese is melted and browned, broil at the end if you want more color. You can add sausage to this if you want, to do so remove Italian sausage from its casing and brown in a pan breaking it up into small chunks. It'll be greasy so drain the fat into a separate container
Add the sausage to the cheese mixture and follow the rest of the steps.

[Anonymous No.19255090]

>>19255031
CANT GO WRONG WITH BEANS BURRITOS.
PUT BEANS IN A CAN INTO A WRAP
VIO LIA, JUST LIKE ABULITA USED TO MAKE US

[Anonymous No.19255109]

>>19255027
>order take out
>place it in pots and pans in and around your oven
>pretend you cooked it
it's that simple

[Anonymous No.19255131]

>>19255027
Try this easy, quick, and delicious camargo fillet of beef. It is sure to impress!

[Anonymous No.19255298]

Steamed hams are easy to make

[Anonymous No.19255309]

>>19255027
>What's a recipe I can learn that's really simple to make and that I can't possilbly fuck up, but looks really difficult to make
buy a chuck roast first thing in the morning when the meat gets marked down
sear on both sides til it gets that good color
drop it in a crock pot on low all day
google a good mashed potato recipe

[Anonymous No.19255522]

>>19255027
Hello! I'd love to contribute to the next 'Recipes for People Who Don't Cook' horseshit listicle.

Just go to YouTube and look for any of Jacques Pepin's short videos. Unbelievably easy, and very delicious.

Here's a start. A moron-proof Frech classic that is very good: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=MZ9dO7qOeIQ

[Anonymous No.19255529]

>>19255298
We're not in Utica, Seymour.

[Anonymous No.19255555]

>>19255027
Find a Chef John, Chef Jean-Pierre, or French Cooking Academy video you like and follow the recipe

[s4s gold No.19255589]

>>19255027
>/ck/ daily thread No.23 - Help, I said I can cook to impress but I can't

huh, normally its a girl not 4 people. Is this a gangbang OP?

[Anonymous No.19255617]

>>19255589
he's underage b&, lives at home, and the people are mom dad sister (uhoh) and a wildcard aunt/grandma/family friend. case closed

[Anonymous No.19255620]

>>19255027
baked mac n cheese or
fried potatoes(like the kind you get with breakfast)

and steak (cook it medium rare as thats pretty easy and not overcooked and season it with salt, pepper and a little worcestershire sauce

and cook some asparagus with bacon in a pan in the oven

[Anonymous No.19255623]

>>19255027
Just buy some steamed hams and plate them nicely.

[Anonymous No.19255653]

>>19255050
Oh no, cooklets here CAN screw stews up. Especially with no browning of meat? Gonna be flavorless slop, an unmitigated disaster. OP gonna skip half the shit because he can't read and won't know half the ingredients, then will fuck up heat settings, and will burn that shit.

[Anonymous No.19255668]

>>19255027
>They know that I don't know how to cook, and I want to prove them wrong.
You won't. Best get a platter of hamburgers and call them steamed hams. Just don't mention the northern lights.

>>19255109
THIS. Just get catering in a big container, put it a casserole dish or some shit, warm it up in the oven and BOOM, pretend you made that shit.


Can OP even operate a knife safely without killing themselves?

[Anonymous No.19255726]

Do some sort of oven bake, pretty hard to screw up when you just have to put a dish in the oven
Chicken and rice - google a recipe but just put rice and chicken stock in an oven dish, season some chicken thighs, put them on top, bake.
Get one of those seasoned frozen veggie mixed you just have to throw in the microwave

[Anonymous No.19255746]

>>19255522
>>19255555
This is very good advice. Pepin's persillade will: A) get you laid, and B) make her parents like you.

[Anonymous No.19255823]

>>19255746
You know what got me laid in high school? Not football
I knew how to french a fucking rack of ribs