/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.18923848]

I'm a self architect. What are some calorific meal ideas for putting on weight?

[Anonymous No.18923860]

>>18923848
whatever your mom is eating

[Anonymous No.18923865]

>>18923860
heyooo
>>18923848
Maximize oils and fats, minimize fibers and processed carbohydrates. Not sugars, though, because you don't want to give yourself diabetes, you just want to become a fat fuck.
Pro tip: on this diet, your shits will be unbelievably vile.

[Anonymous No.18923880]

>Be me
>Permanently 110 pounds
>Urge to gain gets the better of sometimes
>Start trying to eat more at every meal until im almost uncomfortably full
>After a week, Waist band start to feel tighter.
>Take a shit
>Waistband is loose again

I FUCKING HATE MY BODY JUST LET ME PUT ON A COUPLE POUNDS ALREADY

[Anonymous No.18923919]

>>18923880
manlet

[Anonymous No.18923935]

>>18923848
Follow the niko diet. Foolproof

[Anonymous No.18923946]

>>18923848
Steaks 'n' weights

[Anonymous No.18924621]

>>18923880
I envy you skellies; I wish I could eat all I want and still remain skinny.

[Anonymous No.18924632]

>>18923848
Eat 3 packets of instant ramen a day. Promise you will gain weight.

[Anonymous No.18924639]

>>18923848
oat porridge with yolk and loads of butter mixed in every morning

[Anonymous No.18925710]

>>18923848
kill yourself unironically bro
Unless you are a woman then go ham fatty :3

[Anonymous No.18925717]

>>18923848
From the looks of that picture it seems that twinkies would be right up your ally.

[Anonymous No.18925727]

>>18923860
No way. I'm not letting him taste a single ounce of my semen.

[Anonymous No.18925737]

>>18925727
We have to protect all of our precious bodily fluids

[Anonymous No.18925762]

Coca-Cola
Whole milk
Poutine
Barbecue pork and brisket
Sloppy Joe's with cheese
An entire crock of cottage cheese. Hold the fruit
Sloppy Joe over mashed potatoes with shredded cheese

Probably one of the easiest way to get a lot of calories is milkshakes. Make it yourself with real ice cream

Another good way is an entire broiled salmon. Lay spinach on a cookie sheet and drizzled with olive oil and bake it. It's not very filling and it has tons of calories

Ribeyes, ribeyes with béarnaise sauce. Ribeye with Gorgonzola cream sauce.

guacamoles on everything, sandwiches, burgers, steaks salmon burritos etc

[Anonymous No.18925767]

>>18925762
Also don't drink before meals. Use Coca-Cola after meal to support digestion

Drink whole milk to quench your thirst

[Anonymous No.18925789]

>>18925767
Also, pass on carbs unless it's something like poutine or chili cheese fries. When you eat some nice protein like salmon or steak eat nothing but that

[Anonymous No.18925792]

>>18925789
Drink sprite with your dinner though instead of Coke so you can sleep well. I get most of calories at dinner because you'll put on the weight as you sleep

Start smoking marijuana

[Anonymous No.18926990]

>>18923848
Ice cream milkshakes and smoothies. Us a combination of ice cream, milk, bananas, and berries. If you really want to mix things up you can even add in a slice of cake to get some extra texture and flavour. It all tastes amazing.

[Anonymous No.18928295]

>>18923848
>I'm a self architect
That just makes you a builder
You need a muse to work on to be a true architect

[Anonymous No.18928323]

Just eat carbs
>high calorie count
>burn through them in half an hour so you can stuff yourself again
Refrain from eating meat and fat, those are too satiating.

[Anonymous No.18928332]

>>18923848
Just make nice sugar loaded desserts.
You will be fat in no time.

[Anonymous No.18928341]

Donuts, candy, soda, and fast food.

[Anonymous No.18928351]

>>18923848

[Anonymous No.18928376]

a dozen oven pizzas
bacon, egg and cheese toasted sandwiches for breakfast
peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with 1/4 a gallon of milk
vegetable soups, raw carrots, tomatoes, cucumber, fruits for snacking
yogurt, nuts, etc

[Anonymous No.18928493]

>>18926990
>ice cream milkshakes
This is the correct answer.

[Anonymous No.18929432]

>>18925789
>>18928323
>eat carbs
>dont eat carbs

God damn a weight gain diet is just as divided as a weight loss diet.

[Anonymous No.18929444]

>>18923848
>I'm a self architect
> has nothing to do with his diet
Pretentious fag that whines/ brags about being to skinny

[Anonymous No.18929852]

>>18929444
He doesn't spend much calories and is still thin?

[Anonymous No.18929860]

>>18923848
Just eat cookies not that hard.

[Anonymous No.18929874]

>>18923848
>>18923880
mental illness thread

[Anonymous No.18929877]

I've put on almost 5kg of (I hope) muscle in the last few months with some casual home lifting. All I do is have about a cup of oats with a cup of milk (and fruit and shit ofc), couple of eggs later in the day, a skyr yoghurt and whatever meat-based dish I feel like for dinner.

[Anonymous No.18930251]

>>18923880
don't do it bro, just masturbate and get it all out.
the weight is best suited for your future gf, don't do it or you'll explode and there will be no turning back!

[Anonymous No.18931293]

>>18923865
>Maximize oils and fats, minimize fibers and processed carbohydrates
Are you trying to help him get thin?

[Anonymous No.18931298]

>>18929432
The trick is realising that literally nobody knows jack shit about how the human body works and you should just make up your own damn mind.

[Anonymous No.18931368]

>>18923848
You mean a BLOATLORD? Just eat more than what you usually can, you'll see results in a few months.

[Anonymous No.18931829]

>>18930251
I don't even understand this comment. Was this written by AI? The context is completely unrelated.

>>18923880
You could try weight gainer but it'll be very rough on your body.

[Anonymous No.18932147]

>>18931829
Yes.