/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.18644287]

thoughts?

[Anonymous No.18644295]

I had a really nice shit today. Liquid squirts. Really cleaned me out.

[Anonymous No.18644296]

none

[Anonymous No.18644297]

Thought thought he farted but really he shit his pants

[Anonymous No.18644304]

Fixed

[Anonymous No.18644305]

>>18644287
None at all, I try not to think.

[Anonymous No.18644308]

>>18644304
you dont like the netherlands?

[Anonymous No.18644353]

>>18644287
Jägermeister reporting in

[Anonymous No.18644354]

>>18644353
Also WTF that's not Arme Ritter.

Arme Ritter is like French Toast and not a cheese Sandwich

[Anonymous No.18644363]

>>18644287
Amazing. Literally every good dish listed in that image is from either Bayern or the Black Forest. Why didn't the north ever make anything decent?

[Anonymous No.18644392]

>>18644287
Why do they always claim bratwurst and schweinebraten being Bavarian?
Also Frisia needs pic related.

[Anonymous No.18644434]

>>18644308
Who does?

[Anonymous No.18644444]

>>18644434
Only ever been to DUDEWEEDsterdam
Pretty ok

[Anonymous No.18644452]

>>18644308
No their walls just broke, the entire country is under the sea now.

[Anonymous No.18644454]

>>18644444
nice quads
I mostly find the Dutch insufferable so I tend to not visit

[Anonymous No.18644463]

>>18644452
whats your favorite dish that involves fish?

[Anonymous No.18644530]

>>18644287
I like Germans and I appreciate their culture, but even a Germanyaboo like me puts his hands up with German food. Brehs it's just not very good, there I said it. You gotta wonder why the largest European minority has limited cultural impact in regards to their traditional foods when compared to other ethnicities like Italians in America. The only German food in America of note is bastardized versions like hamburgers and hot dogs, foods that no longer resemble their predecessors.

Regardless, I can't think of any German dishes that really inspired me with much excitement like other cuisines can. Most regional German varieties seem to just be variations in sausages, bread, and beer. And if we're being honest that seems like what most German meals are; a couple sausage links, some bread, and a glass of beer. No sauces, no special seasoning, nothing that melts my panties. I live in a big city that's known for it's German settlers, and we have a grand total of 2 German restaurants in a metro area of over 8 million. I mean common guys, that's not good.

[Anonymous No.18644539]

>>18644287
yeah, that looks pretty German

[Anonymous No.18644543]

I like the white cabbage salad

and even pizza delivery gave me a side of salad
in america, side salads are beyond shit especially fast food

[Anonymous No.18644547]

>>18644530
Most germans like me would outright admit that our food is shit.
I live in a city of ~120k people and theres only 1 (one) german restaurant. The others are italians, chinese, greeks, turks, or Sushi
Also most young germans don't really cook traditional food at home.
Chilli Con Carne, Spaghetti and Fried Rice are probably more popular than any of the foods in the OP image

[Anonymous No.18644556]

>>18644287
1. South
2. East
.
.
5. Central
6. North
POWER GAP
9001. West

[Anonymous No.18644564]

>>18644530
Surely it couldn’t have anything to do with the tsunami of anti-German propaganda and laws leading up to WWI and continuing to this day.

[Anonymous No.18644568]

I like when germans take credit for kebab and get all excited about teaching the german way of making kebab (on youtube for example)

[Anonymous No.18644600]

>>18644564
>he thinks I didn't know that shit happened

Its a testament to the resilience of German culture that foods like hot dogs and hamburgers weren't eliminated all together. But even if German culture was completely obliterated in America after ww2, that wouldn't change the fact that modern German food just isn't very interesting or good enough to warrant having a bunch of restaurants and imitators, like other cuisines. You don't see hundreds of German all over the place, not because people are too afraid of their stores being burned down in an anti German pogrom; they don't exist because nobody would go to them bedsus German food just isn't that good.

[Anonymous No.18644603]

>>18644568
It's so gay
Kebab is kino though

[Anonymous No.18644604]

I love German sushi

[Anonymous No.18644612]

>>18644530
Barely anyone actually knows or eats the foods in OP pic.

The only reason I even know foods like Arme Ritter or Knieper Kohl is because my mom used to cook the recipes she grew up with

[Anonymous No.18644637]

>>18644612
It's a shame because Germans seem to have cool foods, but when I visited it was a little limited. Reminds me a lot of Poland, except Poles still like to cook their own dishes. You're sort of in between abyss that is Scandinavia and UK and high tier stuff like Italy and France. I love to joke and say Spaniards are actually tan Germans with better temperament as half of their dishes are potatoes and they're the biggest beer drinkers in Southern Europe.

[Anonymous No.18644681]

>>18644444
amsterdam was my least favorite place because of that culture. it was like a Seattle coop with a rembrandt background, but somehow with even more piss.

[Anonymous No.18644703]

>>18644681
visit Drenthe instead :)

[Anonymous No.18644711]

>>18644287
pharisaer looks nice, what is it?

[Anonymous No.18644712]

>>18644604
Good Seelachs is fucking delicious.

[Anonymous No.18644717]

>>18644711
>pharisaer
coffee with brown rum and whipped cream on top

[Anonymous No.18644718]

>>18644717
you had me at rum, gonna make that myself frfr

[Anonymous No.18644720]

>>18644703
I also visited Leiden and found it very comfortable. I am not in the vicinity to visit Drenthe atm.

[Anonymous No.18644727]

>>18644287
sweet pastries are the only decent part of our cuisine. Maybe Klöße because it's so unique (basically big gnocchi). German sausage and ham is overrated as fuck and other countries like Poland and Italy mog us in this department. Most dishes are just sad and a waste of good ingredients.

[Anonymous No.18644746]

>>18644530
German food is some of the best. It's not flashy like French dining, nor is it exotic like Indian, nor is it focuses on fresh ingredients like Italian. German cuisine is the home cooked meal, the dependable stomach filler that nevertheless manages to be delicious.
German cuisine has a few staples. Bread, kraut, pigs, potatoes, soup greens, herring, mushrooms, berries, apples, hazelnuts. We squeeze out whatever variance we can from those ingredients. Where other cuisines have five types of bread, we have 500. Yet it all remains simple enough that a housewife can cook pretty much every single German dish in her kitchen.

[Anonymous No.18644760]

>>18644600
German food besides cakes seems rather hard to bastardize for the American taste.
Warm liver and blood wurst is the shit, but i cant imagine eating it with a honey bbq glaze

[Anonymous No.18644768]

>>18644295
Same brah. I lost count of how many scoops of coffee I put in the basket this morning, took about 20 minutes for that first cup to turn my normally rock solid guts into a pyroclastic shit slide that would put the mount saint Helen's eruption to shame

[Anonymous No.18644774]

>>18644454
>quads

[Anonymous No.18644792]

>>18644287
>No Elsass

[Anonymous No.18645072]

>>18644792
It's French, sorry.

[Anonymous No.18645139]

>>18644530
Mediterranean and more southern areas (this includes india, china, mexico etc.) always had had a richer cuisine due to a greater number of availble ingredients and less need to keep things well preserved for long winters. They also had a large number of emigrants opening restaurants for lack of other options.
Also, but this is american-specific: A large part of "american" cuisine is similar to german one. That's no surprise - english (whose cuisine also shares similarities with german, though we like to deny it) and german are the largest historical immigrant groups. Hence a restaurant serving mainstream german dishes wouldn't be a big novelty, it'd have to sell special stuff like in OP.

[Anonymous No.18645236]

>>18644287
Home
>>18644530
You have no idea it is hilarious.

[Anonymous No.18645405]

>>18644287
a lot of savory
probably lots of sodium too

[Anonymous No.18647086]

>>18644746
Thank you for writing so beautifully and aptly

[Anonymous No.18647112]

>>18644600
Did it ever occur to you that you’re just a flaming homosexual?

[Anonymous No.18647286]

>>18644746
Do you retards even understand the things that you are talking about before you type out your essays? Unless you're some 50 year old American boomer, you should know better that French is opposite of "flashy". Half of the most famous dishes are heavy, savoury dishes with thick sauces and lots of meat, like pot au feu and beef bourguignon. One of my favourite things are andouillettes. You probably googled 'French cuisine', saw some haute cuisine dishes and then reinforced it with fifty other boomer memes before deciding, 'Yup, I'm an expert of French food now'. Half of this board still believes Italians use a lot of garlic for seasoning too, JFL.

[Anonymous No.18647466]

>>18647286
>Half of this board still believes Italians use a lot of garlic for seasoning too, JFL.
Americans think the same about French cuisine.

[Anonymous No.18647481]

>>18647466
It's insane how much of American perception of Europe is still based on boomer memes. Lots of France has similar climate to Germany, so it isn't like the ingredients are much different, French are just better at cooking (not to say Germans are shit, they have lots of traditional stuff that is interesting, but sadly they don't respect their own food tradition as much as nations like Italy or France).

[Anonymous No.18647538]

>>18647481
Most of the well known French dishes even are from the nordic or central regions. I don't get the France is mediteranian meme.
France's biggest advantage is their creativity desu. They use much more techniques, herbs/spices, spirits etc. in their cooking although they basically stay in the same food tradition as Germany, which only gets creative with seasonings, when it comes to sausages.

[Anonymous No.18647560]

>>18647538
Well, much like Italy, where the North has a lot of heavy dishes with polenta and lentils, and traditionally butter was used more than olive oil. I think France can more or less be split down in langues d'oc as far as Med food goes. Pic related is very typical of the North, but this is not what people imagine when they hear of Italian food. This is delicious as fuck though.

[Anonymous No.18647562]

>>18647538
>>18647560
Another example. Polenta with donkey meat sloppa.

[Anonymous No.18647571]

>>18647538
Just imagine what these clueless tards would think if this was served instead of some meme "Mediterranean flavours", which is completely made up bullshit by an American author.

[Anonymous No.18647578]

Not that different from Germany I'd like to think.

[Anonymous No.18647581]

>>18647578

[Anonymous No.18647591]

When I was in Germany, I noticed that lots of Germans sort of look down upon their own food. When they think of Italy, they think of this idealized image of cuisine from the South, herbs, etc. Meanwhile they don't need to look any further than just across the southern face of Alps to see that these sort of dishes can be very dignified.

[Anonymous No.18647614]

>>18644604
Man I would *really* like a Fischbrötchen right now...

[Anonymous No.18647656]

>>18644304
Why did you sink Borkum into the sea?

>>18644287
>Bremer Klaben
>not in Bremen
Where is Matjes? Where is Mehlpüt?
I also don't see a single Frikadelle, and the Northern German tea ceremony is ignored entirely.

As a norf german, I feel unrepresented.

[Anonymous No.18647685]

Germ food is dogshit, with the exception of that raw mince on bread. Even then it would be better if it was rye bread.

Central european food in general is atrocious (poland/germany/czech rep/austria) which is weird considering all their neighbours have decent to great cuisine, and at least a few great dishes.

[Anonymous No.18647693]

>>18647685
Polish food is very good. Probably the best of the area.

[Anonymous No.18647714]

>>18647693
Their good food is basically eastern european food, but worse. I can give poles flaki and zurek, but the rest is either german-tier meat-and-potatoes or a shitter version of eastern european dish, like pierogi vs dumplings.

Imo czech is best of region.

[Anonymous No.18647716]

>>18647714
I like all those things and they do them way better with more variety than their neighbours.

[Anonymous No.18647717]

>>18644287
Well, at least it's not british food.
I'd rather eat french food tho

[Anonymous No.18647730]

>>18647716
Well you should stop liking them.

[Anonymous No.18647734]

>>18647730
Friendship with Poland terminated... now Czechia is my best friend

[Anonymous No.18647790]

>>18647685
>easteen Europe has better food than central Europe
Soviet bot detected.

[Anonymous No.18647803]

>>18647790
I agree with him. More variety, and even if it is a lot of meat and potatoes, there's many somewhat unusual things, such as kefit, kvass, etc. Germans don't even know the best uses for cabbage, which is pic related and borsch and cabbage soup (served with sugar as condiment).

[Anonymous No.18648060]

>>18647803
Cabbage soup exists in Germany too. Just google Kohlsuppe.

[Anonymous No.18648067]

>>18647803
there isnt a single east european dish that wasnt stolen from germany

[Anonymous No.18648082]

[Anonymous No.18648147]

>>18648060
Do you eat it with sugar specifically? If not then it is not the same thing.
>>18648067
Cepelinai, Borscht, kvass, etc. Germans don't have monopoly on potatoes or slabs of pork either.

[Anonymous No.18648226]

>>18648147
>Do you eat it with sugar specifically? If not then it is not the same thing.
Obviously not as we are not retarded.

[Anonymous No.18648236]

[Anonymous No.18648237]

>>18648226
It's not the same dish at all then, it specifically requires sugar to balance the flavour. Stop posting immediately you retarded autist.

[Anonymous No.18649901]

>>18644530
>Most regional German varieties seem to just be variations in sausages, bread, and beer.

Let me guess, you NEED more?

[Anonymous No.18650980]

>>18644600
Extremely based, if you move to another country you should assimilate.

[Anonymous No.18651085]

>>18648236
lived 30 years of my miserable life in Germany. never once stepped food into Aldi Süd because I refuse to visit south. What am I missing?

[Anonymous No.18651089]

>>18644530
>no sauces.
try some actual german food you ameribrained reptoid.
>hot dogs and burgers (arguably the MOST POPULAR FOODS ON PLANET EARTH) are just German Inspired and not really German

THEN WHAT IS ITALIAN AMERICAN FOOD RETARD!

[Anonymous No.18651102]

>>18651085
Better food, better beer, cleaner streets, nicer people. And aldi süd, but it's not much different to aldi nord really.

[Anonymous No.18651241]

>>18644530
Nah, there are a lot of sauces. But most of them are vinegar based so they might not come off as a condiment. That or sour cream.

>>18644612
The name already says it. Most traditional German foods were traditional because they were poor people food and easy to make. Now granted, that's basically all traditional cuisine.
In this case it was specifically the post-war generations that were both living in prosperity as well as alienated from their culture that left it behind, aka once again boomers fucked it up.

[Anonymous No.18651284]

>>18651102
>Better food, better beer, cleaner streets, nicer people
Is this opposite day Germany you live in?

[Anonymous No.18651286]

>>18651284
You know it's true saupreis.

[Anonymous No.18651293]

>>18651286
Even the east is better than the south. At least they add hops to their beer or spices to their food.

[Anonymous No.18651298]

>>18648082
based and Grühnkohl-pilled

[Anonymous No.18651303]

>>18651293
>At least they add hops to their beer or spices to their food.
You have never been here and it shows.

[Anonymous No.18651316]

>>18648237
He never said it was the same dish you actual retard.

[Anonymous No.18651335]

>>18651316
>bug m-muh stolen dishes
Learnt to read, moran.

[Anonymous No.18651342]

>>18651286
the bavarian inferiority complex strikes again

[Anonymous No.18651378]

>>18651335
He never said that it was stolen. Just that cabbage soups (which are different from the one you mean) exist in Germany.

[Anonymous No.18651388]

>>18651378
Yeah, but do you have cat in wok?

[Anonymous No.18651453]

>>18651388
Mashallah, I bake cats

[Anonymous No.18651458]

>>18651453
German bros why did u do that...

[Anonymous No.18651591]

>>18644287
Don't like most regional specialities. I make mine sweet-sour like how I know from home (like Rippenbraten, Hühnerfrikassee, Sauerfleisch or Königsberger Klopse).

[Anonymous No.18651628]

>>18651458
Merkel commands, and we bake
inshallah

[Anonymous No.18651940]

>>18651293
>>18651342
seethe

[Anonymous No.18652125]

>>18651940
Cope harder

[Anonymous No.18652194]

>>18644287
What the fuck is Rheinischer Sauerbraten doing in northern Westphalia?

[Anonymous No.18652258]

>>18644287
It's a bit of a shame how relatively rare most of these food have gotten over the years.
Much of the stuff from the pic is actually quite good, but our relation to food is horribly utilitarian and we never developed any genuinely fine dining or decent food culture.
Wolfgang Pohrt, an infamous marxist intellectual edgelord, brought back in 1981 the quote below for a good reason:
>"May elsewhere the traditional lifestyles of entire nations have fallen victim to American cultural imperalism, in Germany American cultural imperialism didn't bring barbarianism but civilization. In this country every new branch of the McDonalds hamburger chain is a new island of hospitality and enrichment of the dining culture."

[Anonymous No.18652398]

>>18651940
reread
>>18651342

[Anonymous No.18652404]

>>18652398
Ask anyone in the world to describe German culture and they will immediately begin describing Bavarian culture. Cope and seethe irrelevant Prussian piss stain.

[Anonymous No.18652426]

>>18652404
>Bavarian culture
Oh you're actually proud of the stereotype of the fat lederhosen man carrying around beer mugs and pretzels wherever he goes? You do you my man

[Anonymous No.18652457]

I'm going to Germany next year.
I'll be there for over a year.
Any good and simple recipes? I'll be living alone and I want to know what people usually eat there.

[Anonymous No.18652517]

>>18652426
>fat lederhosen man carrying around beer mugs and pretzels wherever he goes
sounds like a proper lad, I'd love to hang out with him

[Anonymous No.18652531]

>>18652426
>fat lederhosen man carrying around beer mugs and pretzels
Basiert und rotgepillt

[Anonymous No.18652534]

>>18652457
pasta with apfelmus

[Anonymous No.18652538]

>>18652457
>what people usually eat there.

Pizza, Spaghetti (Bolognese), Döner, Schnitzel mit Pommes

[Anonymous No.18652547]

I don't speak kraut, faggot
THIS IS AMERICA

[Anonymous No.18652574]

>>18652547
Kraut is a German word. You don't even have your own word for Kindergarten LMAO

[Anonymous No.18652749]

>>18644287
Rate my setup

[Anonymous No.18653042]

>>18652457
Depends heavily on the area you are going to be living in.
Bavaria? Berlin? NRW? Saxony? Hamburg?

[Anonymous No.18653601]

>>18645139
>india, china, mexico
what else do they have besides stir fry slop in a flatbread and occasionally a soup

[Anonymous No.18653619]

>>18644287
properly made franzbrotchen are god tier on par with the best french pastry

[Anonymous No.18653622]

>>18652749
thumbnail looked like chile and sea bass

[Anonymous No.18653752]

>>18644295
pic?

[Anonymous No.18653758]

>>18651388
I love his grumpy little face

[Anonymous No.18655474]

bump

[Anonymous No.18655502]

>>18653042
I'll be living in Nuremberg

[Anonymous No.18655550]

>>18652574
English is a mutt language, taking elements from every other European language over the course of 3000 years until it morphed into its current form.

[Anonymous No.18655636]

Do you like Kässpatzle and Maultaschen? Those are pretty good (if done right). Why wouldn't anyone like fresh egg noodles with fried onions, tasty aged cheese and chives?

[Anonymous No.18655640]

>>18655502
Are you American? Maybe we could meet up and cook together.

[Anonymous No.18655721]

>>18655502
Frankonia is one of the best regions in Germany when it comes to food and beer.

[Anonymous No.18655775]

>>18655502
>Nuremberg
Then you must exclusively live off LEBKUCHEN

[Anonymous No.18656974]

stoss