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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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18393940 No.18393940 [Reply] [Original]

what is the biggest mess you've made while cooking? last night i was reverse searing two steaks. my pan wasn't big enough for two steaks, so i did it in batches. steak #1 finished so i went to deglaze with a little water. apparently the pan was still far too hot because it sizzled and steamed for 5 seconds before violently exploding and coating my range hood and ceiling (and arms) with hot grease.

>> No.18393948

No foul. You want to season up those arms a little bit. Think of it like the calluses you grow on your hand if you play an instrument.

>> No.18393953

>>18393940
Once, I dropped an egg on the floor, and few years after that a strawberry.

>> No.18393978

>>18393940
I shit my pants once while cooking bacon naked. Does that count?

>> No.18393982

>>18393940
I dont make a mess, I clean as I go like a kitchen pro

>> No.18393983

>>18393940
kys frogcancer

404

>> No.18393989

>>18393940
>Be me, in my 20s
>Spending night with red head female at her apartment in St Paul
>We get wasted drunk
>Get hungry after she goes to sleep
>Put frozen pizza in oven
>Have another shot and accidentally fall asleep on couch waiting for it to cook
>Wake up 7 hours later
>Smoke everywhere (she removes fire alarms because she smoked inside occasionally)
>Open windows and smoke starts billowing out
>Entire kitchen is stained grey and an acrid smell in the air
>Open stove and find smoking carbon disk that used to be pizza
>Toss it out the window into busy city Street
>Leave

>> No.18394001

>>18393989
ok but did you get laid?

>> No.18394002

>>18393989
did you later fuck her?

>> No.18394023

>be me
>make ribeye steak pasta with creamy spinach and tomato sauce
>cum all over myself from how good it tastes
ops!

>> No.18394109

>>18394001
>>18394002
Sadly no, ended up with another woman for brunch that morning and things went well though. She made juevos rancheros

>> No.18394253
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18394253

>>18393940

>> No.18394264

>>18393940
Tried to airfry wet batter on chicken. A nightmare to clean.

Making mini pavolas, never again

>> No.18394274

>>18393989
>allowing strange men in your home
I don't understand how women feel safe

>> No.18394280

>>18393940
My boyfriend bent me over the counter while I was making vegan smoothie and when he finished and pulled out I squirted shit and cum out of my ass that went EVERYWHERE

>> No.18394413

It was a contained mess, if a mess, but I tried making my own machine at home. Fuck man that was the hardest shit to clean out of a pan I've ever encountered.

>> No.18394438

>>18394413
>machine
what kind of machine
why didn't you just toss it in the rubbish bin or scrap pile

>>18393940
couple weeks ago I poured a cup of kool aid and as I was putting it back in the fridge I heard a thump. fucking cup tipped over!! some asshole thought it was a good idea to put carpet in a kitchen. I rent

>> No.18394477

>>18394280
Faggot

>> No.18394498

>>18393940
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/w_RaBBPbHyA

>> No.18394515

Is deglazing with water a meme around here ? You need an acidic base.

>> No.18394570

Not me, personally, but my sister made an enormouse dent once while we were all visiting our parents for some holiday or other. She prepared the coffee pot incorrectly, forcing the he top-half to shoot upward, putting a rather large dent in the hood, spewing lava-hot beanwater all over the kitchen.
Thankfully, we were all in the dining room when it happened.