Carbonara

[Anonymous No.18083000]

Anons, what mayo do you use for carbonara? I tried a couple different brands, like Hellman's, Kraft, even Kewpie, but something's always off. Is there any Italian mayo brand which would make my carbonara truly restaurant-grade? Any tips are welcome.

[Anonymous No.18083005]

>>18083000
The fuck is carbonera and mayo on pasta wtf

[Anonymous No.18083012]

>>18083000
i fucking hate this board sometimes

[Anonymous No.18083014]

This is why this board should be nuked

[Anonymous No.18083015]

Why would you do this

[Anonymous No.18083016]

>>18083000
...there is no mayo in carbonara..

[Anonymous No.18083023]

>>18083000
Checked.

Also I use miracle whip.

[Anonymous No.18083026]

You're probably forgetting to add cream

[Anonymous No.18083043]

>>18083000
Checked. But here you go:
https://youtu.be/90LalTBSIhE

[Anonymous No.18083079]

Why do Italians seethe at any dish involving pasta made by a non italian? Some of just like the noodles wtf

[Anonymous No.18083123]

>>18083000
It's all cum, not mayo

[Anonymous No.18083285]

>>18083000
Carbonara is just egg, pepper, pecorino and pasta water. Do NOT put mayo in there.

[Anonymous No.18083291]

>>18083285
Mayo is basically just egg and oil there's almost no difference. I've had mayo carbo and "traditional" and could barely tell the difference.

[Anonymous No.18083305]

>>18083043
With the support that suspension has wouldn't it make the size of the tires nearly irrelevant? That matrix of metal pipes underneath the car would get crushed wouldn't it?
>>18083079
Boredom is the only explanation. Nothing to do after they stopped being a world power however many years ago.

[Anonymous No.18083330]

>>18083285
>leaving out the lard

sneaky vegetarian fucker

[Anonymous No.18083339]

I burned my burgers for the first time in 3 years.

[Anonymous No.18083352]

>>18083339
A burnt burger is better than no burger. And honestly, can be kind of nice with the right amount of char. What kind of cheese you rocking there?

[Anonymous No.18083365]

>>18083352
That is munster which has become my cheese of choice for burgers at least with my standard toppings.

[Anonymous No.18083367]

>>18083000
>mayo
There's your problem. You should've used ranch sauce as a base.

[Anonymous No.18083370]

>>18083365
Good shit.

[Anonymous No.18083381]

>>18083000
restaurant mayo isn't the same as store mayo, yu0 need to get hellman's extra heavy mayonnaise but it's only sold in bulk

[Anonymous No.18083387]

>>18083305
>That matrix of metal pipes underneath the car would get crushed wouldn't it?
no and the trucks actually float

[Anonymous No.18083478]

>>18083387
Huh, cool.

[Anonymous No.18083534]

>>18083000
Have you tried not being a fat retard?

[Anonymous No.18083544]

>>18083000
Checked, good thread op

[Anonymous No.18083549]

>>18083016
I suppose next you're going to tell me there is no ketchup in Spaghetti.

[Anonymous No.18083574]

The heat of the pasta splits the mayo

[Anonymous No.18083576]

>>18083000
its tasty and it makes fake italians seethe

[Anonymous No.18083579]

>>18083000
>Miracle Whip

[Anonymous No.18083594]

ck s the easiest board to troll they take the bait every time

[Anonymous No.18083700]

>>18083594
because we rightfully assume you are retarded because more than nought you are

[Anonymous No.18083763]

>>18083005
It's supposed to be:
Eggs
Pecorino romano
Black pepper
Guanciale (pancetta is acceptable, bacon if you can't get that)
Spaghetti

Mix the eggs, cheese and pepper in a bowl.
Start the pasta and render the pork down
Put the pasta into the meat and stir up to thoroughly coat
Add the egg and cheese mix with the heat off and stir thoroughly to turn it into a sauce, add pasta water if you need to thin it a bit.

That's it.

[Anonymous No.18084052]

>>18083763
u forget ze salt

[Anonymous No.18084064]

>>18084052
Are you retarded?
You don't need to fucking tell someone to salt their food?
If you tell someone to lightly salt their food, kill yourself.
It's pasta. Die faggot die. Salt your pasta or it won't taste good. Jfc you redditor

[Anonymous No.18084068]

>>18084064
95% of this board is fast food posting, and some people that do cook don't salt at the correct time which should be in the water

[Anonymous No.18084075]

>>18084064
>Are you retarded?
yeah

[Anonymous No.18084143]

I just want to find a good carbonara recipe that uses cream like chain restaurants do. Every FUCKING recipe on the internet is some fsggot LARPING as an italian pedelling the same old recipe which all have Guanciale. Hey Lorenzo, we're not in the old country anymore, you cant buy that crap here.

[Anonymous No.18084153]

>>18083000
where's the peas, bitch?

[Anonymous No.18084196]

>>18083000
Use miracle whip

[Anonymous No.18084254]

>>18084052
There's plenty in the cured pork and cheese, and if you don't salt your pasta water you fail at life.

[Anonymous No.18084258]

>>18084143
Cream is a crutch, you don't need it for a good carbonara.

[Anonymous No.18084263]

>>18084153
>Peas
OK Nevil.

[Anonymous No.18084326]

>>18084254
i've witnessed someone triggering a fire alarm because they didn't put any water in their microwave easy mac
>>18084153
your moms ass

[Anonymous No.18084360]

If my grandmother had wheels, she would have been a bike.

[Anonymous No.18084415]

I'll show you how I make authentic Italian carbonara

first you get your mise en place on with your great value bacon and pasta, your finest dollar general parmesan, and a non-cage free egg

[Anonymous No.18084417]

and wala authentic carbonara, just likea my mama useda make back in the italy

[Anonymous No.18084423]

>>18084415
>>18084417
Honestly, that's still better than OP's Mayo carbonara.

[Anonymous No.18084437]

>>18083339
fuck me this looks grim as shit

[Anonymous No.18084442]

>>18084360
My great grandmother had wheels. Or, at least one wheel. It was the wheelbarrow she'd usually be taken home drunk in.

I'm not lying.

[Anonymous No.18084501]

I remember when mentioning carbonara here on /ck/ got a dozen of responses like What is that? and OMG the egg is RAW??! I have reason to believe I helped make it popular, FML. One thousand threads and two thousand Italians droning on and on about the correct recipe later I thoroughly hate it. I have not made carbonara sauce in years. It's overrated af, basically a ham, eggs and cheese breakfast over noodles. Fuck carbonara and fuck Italians.

[Anonymous No.18084508]

>>18084501
Carbonara does kind of suck.. you need to make a lot of it or only use like a third or a beaten egg or it's too eggy imo

I prefer straight up olive oil, red pepper and garlic with parmesan any day.. which is strange because I loved cured pork products

[Anonymous No.18084652]

https://www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/ultimate-spaghetti-carbonara-recipe

this is best carbonara recipe i have found so far ngl

would also recommend using a pasta with higher starch + thin pasta like linguine to better absorb the sauce

[Anonymous No.18084766]

>>18084652
for me it's
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AvO8UPbIH30

[Anonymous No.18084844]

>>18084442
Based wheelbarrowgreatgrandmotheranon

[Anonymous No.18085133]

>>18083291
There's also vinegar/lemon in mayo cooklet

[Anonymous No.18085147]

>>18084417
thanks for the recipe anon

[Anonymous No.18085261]

>>18083000
Aioli is mayo basically

[Anonymous No.18085343]

>>18085147
Pasta isn't cooked enough.

[Anonymous No.18085378]

>>18084068
Salt your fork, not your pasta water

[Anonymous No.18085396]

>>18085378
>he doesn't pasta his fork with his water
ngmi

[Anonymous No.18085426]

>>18084143
>I want cream
>>18084258
>n-NO! YOU DONT NEED CREAM! AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
Why is it like this with you people
Just chill

[Anonymous No.18085427]

>>18083005
>>18083012
>>18083014
>>18083015
>>18083016
>>18083285
You fell for the b8, m8

[Anonymous No.18085430]

>>18083000
Every time someone put other than guanciale, eggs, pepper, pecorino and pasta water on carbonara, an italian out there die.

[Anonymous No.18085723]

>>18085430
I know, but there's so many of them

[Anonymous No.18085908]

>>18083000
Mayo? Wtf.

[Anonymous No.18086100]

>>18083000
looks fucking disgusting as fuck.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZCSowIQgHPI

anyways. this one is fucking amazing, the emulsion technique makes it fool proof and perfect creamyness every time

[Anonymous No.18086107]

>>18084766
that one is really good, made it a lot of times. but you should check the one from alex, i went to this one and it's better >>18086100

[Anonymous No.18086118]

>OP makes macoroni salad
>retarded /ck/ loses their minds
looks good. needs more stuff like peppers though

[Anonymous No.18086123]

>>18086118
>macaroni
clearly spanget

[Anonymous No.18086126]

>>18086107
will do, thanks breh

[Anonymous No.18086138]

>>18086118
>amerifats call noodles drenched in mayo salad

jesus christ

[Anonymous No.18086498]

>>18086138
I'm American and I think it's nasty too.

[Anonymous No.18086541]

>>18086498
stop trying to appease foreigners, you cuck faggot. Leave this country

[Anonymous No.18086556]

>>18084143
Guanciale can be readily substituted with pancetta or bacon in a pinch. It just needs to be a salty, smoky pork.

[Anonymous No.18086563]

>>18086541
Pasta salad is gross and you know it. Especially since you get the same stuff in a far superior potato salad.

[Anonymous No.18086569]

>>18086556
If you're in/near a city if you check the smaller independent butchers, they might have it.

[Anonymous No.18086639]

>>18083285
i put mayo in you bitch fuck yoi i am ferom india

[Anonymous No.18086653]

>>18085147
nice. came out better than mine normally does.

[Anonymous No.18086833]

>>18085147
did pregrated parmesan really come out that good?

[Anonymous No.18086906]

>>18086639
You don't get to say shit about what the west did to your cuisine, then.

[Anonymous No.18086912]

>>18086906
The west didn't do anything to Indian cuisine, the only Indian food here is homemade stuff made by vegan hipster women and Indian slumlords who own filthy restaurants.

Nevermind I forgot england exists.

[Anonymous No.18086976]

>>18083000
Dukes and provolone, plus those $4 bags of cubed hame. Super easy and delicious evry time.

[Anonymous No.18087053]

>>18086976
you know.. it's not authentic.. but mayo is basically just eggs and oil... and both ham salad and pasta salad are good and they have mayo..

so I bet this Americanized bastardization is probably pretty good, despite it giving foodie fags and Italian purists fits of palsy.

[Anonymous No.18087058]

Great bait anon, actually amazed at how many genuine responses you got. Stay safe king!

[Anonymous No.18087059]

>>18083005
mayo is just egg and oil

[Anonymous No.18087098]

>>18083000
Duke's.

[Anonymous No.18087110]

>>18083000
2/10 for making me reply

[Anonymous No.18087177]

>>18086138
macaroni salad is great
i make mine with olive oil, balsamic vinegar, pepperroni, cheddar, olives, red onion, garlic and spices like basil, oregano, parsley etc.

[Anonymous No.18087184]

>>18086563
>far superior potato salad.
well that's a fair assessment but mac salad can be good if made right

[Anonymous No.18087199]

>>18087058
/ck/ loves b8 and we don't (you) back for the OP but rather to stop innocent bystanders from making mustard gas by unwittingly following a b8 thread
now eat the berries

[Anonymous No.18087205]

>>18087177
yeah that does look good.. i just had a narrow european view of salad i guess

[Anonymous No.18087219]

>>18087053
facts!

[Anonymous No.18087243]

>>18087205
it's only good if it's homemade, store bought or restaurant are always horrible

[Anonymous No.18087340]

[Anonymous No.18087361]

>>18083000
Is this like putting ketchup on spaghetti?
Asian-Italian food is weird

[Anonymous No.18087364]

>>18083000
You're adding it at the wrong temperature so it's curdling. You have to add it at a specific temperature range for it to be smooth

[Anonymous No.18087382]

>>18083291
Fucking american.. All day sucking dixks, then "fOoDz tAsTeS LiKe NuT'in!"
You just crave for melted cheese to emulate cum, isn't it?

[Anonymous No.18087405]

>>18087382
based repressed homosexual foodie

[Anonymous No.18087411]

>>18086138
Euroids love mayo though they use it all the time in almost everything. They use it for fries, I've seen it on pizza. Why does this website pretend that mayo is something unique to america?

[Anonymous No.18087517]

>>18087411
seething jealously. they consume all of our garbage entertainment content and think life here is like it is in the movies/tv and are jealous they don't live here

[Anonymous No.18087539]

>>18087177
>chunks of Colby in Mac salad
>broccoli

that looks great

[Anonymous No.18087545]

>>18086138
Noodle Salad is a thing in the whole western world faggot.

[Anonymous No.18087619]

>>18083000
>Breakfast spaghetti

[Anonymous No.18087630]

How come an Italian that moved to America can't make pasta as good as an Italian that lives in Rome? How does that work? Any scientists here?

[Anonymous No.18087798]

>>18083000
I am adding milk, fried onions and some herbs.
Good enough Carbonara for me, I can't tell the difference.

[Anonymous No.18088135]

>>18087630
That's because Americans don't expect authentic Italian dishes, they want mac and cheese style slops.

[Anonymous No.18088213]

>>18088135
Italian American cuisine mogs Italian cuisine. We literally improved everything they've ever done from pizza, to the aforementioned mac and cheese.

[Anonymous No.18088222]

>>18088135
I like spaghetti and meatballs

[Anonymous No.18088233]

>>18086833
god no, this is reggiano

[Anonymous No.18088283]

>carbonara
>bacon, eggs, cheese, pasta, salt, pepper
>italians be like NOOOOO YOU CAN'T ADD GARLIC/CREAM/PEAS/MUSHROOMS/BASIL/OR ANYTHING ELSE AAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIEEEEEEEE

[Anonymous No.18088331]

>>18083000
Are you Filipino by any chance?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o5fxL9KBnfQ

[Anonymous No.18088353]

the heat from the pasta cooks the cream

[Anonymous No.18088461]

>>18088283
If you're making a carbonara then indeed you can't. But you can just make another pasta meal with those things, no worries.

[Anonymous No.18088646]

>>18083000
10/10 b8, well done.