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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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File: 2.06 MB, 366x600, cooking on the stove with a little fire.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17837244 No.17837244 [Reply] [Original]

Ever have an accident in the kitchen?

>> No.17837259

i grew up in an alcoholic household and thought that kitchen fires were pretty normal until my 30s

>> No.17837264

I once had an accident at your moms house

9 months later you were born op

>> No.17837266

>>17837244
mmm, conflagration
Yep, forgot about something on the stove, exited a room and there was smoke throughout that level of the house. Opened all the windows and doors and I was glad there was a decent breeze that night

>> No.17837287

>>17837244
Nothing major but plenty of small ones that made me feel stupid. The most recent one was splashing my freshly cleaned uniform while pureeing the soup with an immersion blender, which made him really angry.

>> No.17837311
File: 1.21 MB, 1800x3367, 20220228_165227.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17837311

>>17837244
I dropped a very sharp knife. Thankfully not on the ol' big toe.

>> No.17837746

started a fire like that one once, but was smart enough to just smother it with a towel. that's probably the worst, that was 3 or 4 years ago. ive had kombucha bottles fill with too much pressure and fly everywhere.

>> No.17837979

>>17837746
You weren't smart enough, you were informed enough.

>> No.17838143

This was a while ago so I don't remember exactly. One time I was making pork loin after work but also in a bit of a hurry. I seared it, put it in the oven then got in the shower.
My alarm went off to baste it or because it was done, can't recall. I Quick get out of the bathroom naked, pull the pan out and put it on the stove. Turn away to grab something, turn around too fast and flop my dong straight onto the 350 degree pan handle.
Thank God that I'm not circumcized and proceed to enjoy dinner with a small burn mark on my dick.

>> No.17838322

>>17837979
doesn't matter to me just glad i didn't catch the house on fire

>> No.17838325

>>17837259
Wait... it's not normal?

>> No.17838328

>>17837244
i baked store bought garlic bread on a wire rack in the toaster oven in an effort to fit it in. some of the oil dripped down and made a small fire. i just unplugged it and waited 10 minutes. oven worked fine but the bread was burnt

>> No.17838451

>>17837311
one time my friend dropped a similar knife and it went through his leather boot, landing between his big toe and second toe

>> No.17838455

>>17837746
i too have been victimized by exploding kombucha. mine had chia seeds in it and they went fucking everywhere. pretty sure there are still some on my ceiling.

the biggest kitchen accident was when i was chopping up veggies while my friend was sauteeing something and he tried to do the thing where you shake it and just covered my hand with boiling oil, it's been 15 years and you can still see the scar

>> No.17838459

I sharted myself whilst cooking once.

>> No.17838475

in a couple hours I'm gonna make a pizza in my oven that i cut off the self cleaning latch, gonna use a temp probe to see if it reaches 800F and make my pizza in 2 minutes proper like mario and luigi do it

pray to the fire gods for me

>> No.17838493

>>17837244
>Ever have an accident in the kitchen?
Cooking bacon without a shirt on kinda sucks.

>> No.17838495

>>17838475
Sounds like a drunk idea.

>> No.17838509

>>17838495
im a mechanical engineer, how could this possibly go wrong? i mean there's the possibilty of a fire but the oven is fairly clean top to bottom so...

>> No.17838518
File: 2.57 MB, 488x720, 1652444172812.webm [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17838518

>>17837244
Yes.

>> No.17838523

Last week I was roasting some chicken and heard a "pop" followed by an extended "zap" noise. Got the oven shut off and found a two inch section of the bake element broken off. Chicken still tasted fine, though it didn't get as golden as it should have.

>> No.17838527

>>17837244
yeah, one time my sister bent over to check on her cookies in the oven and i accidentally my sister

>> No.17838628

I splashed boiling water on my foot while clumsily handling a pot of noodle water and instantly received 3rd degree burns and couldn't walk for 2 weeks.

>> No.17838732

>>17838509
You need a pizza stone I think. Usually the preparation of the dough is important as well. (Super thin) My guess is burnt za in your future.

Please post pics of your attempt.

>> No.17838969
File: 46 KB, 303x404, 800.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17838969

>>17838732
alright i survived the experiment with partial success, a preheated surface would have been ideal the center bottom was cooked but not not browned

>> No.17838974
File: 412 KB, 756x1008, done.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17838974

>>17838969
here's the whole thing, it's layered sauce, cheese, pepperoni then more cheese

>> No.17838980
File: 130 KB, 756x1008, melted.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17838980

>>17838974
the temperature probe will need to be replaced, i suspected it might take damage, went better than expected honestly

>> No.17838983
File: 283 KB, 756x1008, cut.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17838983

>>17838980
and plated

>> No.17838998

>>17838983
Do you have any cramming pics?

>> No.17839015

>>17838998
no sir, i do not partake in degenerate filth

>> No.17839017

>>17839015
There's a first time for everything

>> No.17839029

>>17839017
you will commit suicide

>> No.17839033

>>17837311
Why do you even have an expensive japanese deba?

>> No.17839042

>>17839015
>degenerate filth
lawfags OUT

>> No.17839052

>>17838969
>the center bottom was cooked but not not browned
so it was browned?

>> No.17839053

>>17839042
how about i cram my fist down your throat faggot

>> No.17839063

>>17839029
Not before you cram that pizza

>> No.17839068

Undercooked Pizza Anon is getting very defensive about cramming, makes me wonder if he dabbled in the past and enjoyed it a bit too much ;)

>> No.17839069

>>17839053
>fist
i can't handle it,i rather your dick ;)

>> No.17839091

>>17838527
You accidentally your whole sister?

>> No.17839116
File: 22 KB, 650x399, 1565010205562.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17839116

>>17837264
base.

>> No.17839158
File: 51 KB, 789x1017, 1584624741110.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17839158

>>17837264
U drop ure cumcum in mommays bumbum???

>> No.17839195

no but when I was 8 I went to sleep with a scented candle in my room and woke up to a room full of fire

>> No.17839220

>>17838974
This is a very nice looking pizza, anon

>> No.17839240

>>17837244
i forgot about a tea kettle. i smell smoke, all the water evaporated and the plastic handle melted and smoked as it hit the screaming hot metal.

>> No.17839271

>>17837264
PWNED!!

>> No.17839327

>>17839220
Anonymously complimenting your own pizza because no one else would, can't get much lower than that

>> No.17839335

>>17837244
Left a knife with a plastic handle on the conveyor belt of one of those fast food ovens. Shit was a pain in the ass to clean and the smell was awful

>> No.17839690

>>17837244
my microwave and refrigerator are adjacent

>want to microwave food
>walk over to microwave
>open refrigerator door

>want to refrigerate something
>walk over to refrigerator
>open microwave door instead

I always get it wrong

>> No.17840104

>>17838974
looks like good ‘za anon

>> No.17840355

>>17838509
>im a mechanical engineer
Hi there Alex

>> No.17840364

>>17837244
heated up some honey that exploded and put a rorscach ink blotch burn mark on my arm

>> No.17840374

>>17838475
as soon as you open it to put the pizza in, the temp drops to 200c

>> No.17840870

>>17838143
>flop my dong straight onto the 350 degree pan handle
kek

>> No.17840920

>>17839195
Haha epic, too bad you didn't die. What happened afterwards?

>> No.17840938

>>17837244
I accidently put this jew in the oven. My bad.

>> No.17841013
File: 468 KB, 588x800, file.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17841013

When I came back from a cubscouts meeting as a little kid, it was the middle of winter and I was trying to heat up next to an electric stove.
Turns out that I was too close to the heating element, and my neckerchief burst into flames while I was still wearing it.


The sad part is that the meeting was about fire safety, and it didn't even occur to me to stop, drop, and roll.
My dad ended up putting it out with his bare hands and got a scar because of it.

>> No.17841019

>>17838518
kek

>> No.17841114

>>17837244
>water on a grease fire.
Women shouldn't be allowed to even be in the kitchen they fuck up literally everything.

>> No.17841125

>>17837244
Tried using the "self cleaning" feature on my oven. I got smoked out of my own apartment.

>> No.17841130

>>17841125
Last time I tried that, the glass on the oven straight up shattered.