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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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17481595 No.17481595 [Reply] [Original]

what's the worst you've ever fucked up a recipe?
>got high
>wanted brownies
>didn't measure anything
>used powdered egg substitute because I'm out of eggs
>batter has the consistency of dough
>what
>add a little water
>find out later I added double the chocolate I should have (and I used 92%)
>didn't set the timer right
>found this when I went looking for what smelled like burning in my apartment

>> No.17481601

Coulda been some nice ass brownie cookies with extra sugar and not burning them

>> No.17481630

>>17481595
>got high
DUDE

>> No.17481666

>>17481595
Why is that guy flipping off a casserole dish of caviar?

>> No.17482670

>>17481595
Why are your nails painted faggot?

>> No.17482675

Druggies deserve what they get.

>> No.17483301

>>17481595
Every druggie retard, especially those tranny faggots that paint their nails, should be shot and killed.

>> No.17483403

Lol @ stoners

>> No.17483459

>>17481595
When I was 10, my first go at reading a recipe was for pizza dough, and my moronic brain read 1 teaspoon of salt, as 1 tablespoon. It wasn't what I would call too edible.

>> No.17483551

>>17483459
lmfaoooo
>>17482670
>>17482675
>>17483301
malding?

>> No.17483559

Too much lime juice in guacamole.

Too much chilli pepper in a chicken marinade and forgot the honey to neutralize it

>> No.17483574

trannies should at least learn to cook before they start HRY imo

>> No.17483612
File: 886 KB, 967x1663, Screenshot_20220226-113443_Gallery.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17483612

>>17481595
>be me
>be making mushroom risotto
>gotta add salt, pepper, and thyme into the mushrooms
>thyme and pepper go in without a hitch
>twist the built-in salt mill a little harder and faster than usual this time
>*pop*
>"huh?"
>*POOOOF*
>get fucking Rust player levels of salt in my mushrooms
>mushrooms ruined
>mfw

>> No.17483694

>>17483612
I know. I know. Fine salt dissolves better when cooking but I like big chunky kosher salt when I cook. The smoked kind I smoke myself is my go to. No need for grinding when you just put huge rocks in.

>> No.17483787

>>17482670
>>17482675
>>17483301
>>17483574
why are you faggots on this board? still crying they canned /qa/?

>> No.17483804
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17483804

>have a perfectly great meal on its own
>add Maggi, to really amp it up
>cannot taste anything besides maggi, meal ruined
Emptied the bottle into the sink and swore off never to use it again.

>> No.17483820

>>17481595
dumb fucking faggot

>> No.17483840

>>17481595
>got high
stopped reading there loser

>> No.17483866

>>17483840
I was smoking weed xD :3

>> No.17483923

>>17481595
Was going to bake some brownies, but I got high
Was supposed to use canola oil, but I got high
And so they tasted like shit, and I know why
Because I got high
Because I got high
Because I got high

>> No.17483984
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17483984

>>17481595
>have a teenage daughter
>dad I'm going to make pancakes
>OK sweety the pancake mix is in the pantry
>I want to make them from scratch I found a recipe online
>my eye begins to twitch immediately because I know this will end in a culinary abortion
>o-ok then, everything you'll need is in the pantry
>15 minutes pass
>smells like the house is on fire
>run into kitchen
>what the fuck
>dad I don't know what happened I followed the recipe
>look in the pantry
>the flour is still sitting on the shelf
>uhhh.png
>why is the flour still on the shelf
>the flour is right here dad look
>the container she's pointing to next to her is CLEARLY LABELED powdered sugar
>are you kidding me right now
>oh, woops hee hee
>pic related, it's the culinary abortion

>> No.17484004

>>17481595
>Faggot gets high and acts retarded
Wow, what a surprise

>> No.17484009

>>17483984
Is your daughter hot?

>> No.17484019

>>17483984
>caramel-glue-whatshisface
Time to get a new pan.

>> No.17484041

>>17483984
You should’ve taught her better. My 8 year old makes decent pancakes from scratch. Not really hating though, I’m sure yours has other things she’s great at.

>> No.17484056
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17484056

>>17484041

>> No.17484684

bump!

>> No.17484703

>>17483984
bet she rides the short bus

>> No.17486304
File: 1.99 MB, 400x226, 283j7fqo8374gn35h.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17486304

>>17483866

>> No.17486374

>>1748159
SOUP
Drunk, fill pot with water, boil, start dropping random things in: eggs, hamburger, soy sauce, beans, spaghetti, yogurt, onion, spices, chocolate syrup, frozen shrimp, hot sauce, bacon, canned tamales, canned tomatoes
Grab at pot handle and fall backwards on floor boiling soup on me
Third degree burns on arms chest stomach groin legs
Grab onto counter to get up slip fall backwards hitting head on edge of table knocked unconscious
Smoke alarm goes off
Fat Blackman in firefighter suit wakes me up with inhalant
Calls me peckerwood asks for yo bank
I mumble teeth broken
FBman kicks me under the arms breaking ribs, puts my head between his feet unzips and pisses on my face I'm gagging and coughing frothy blood piss
Goes into my infant sons bedroom and comes back with my child in his hands
I'm gonna pitch this opens a window and football passes my son across the parking lot
Yo yo cooking shit yo
Drives across town and strangles my grandma

>> No.17486395

>>17482670
judging by the women's watch, i'm guessing it's a woman with man-hands

>> No.17486492

>>17486374
You honestly hate to see it

>> No.17486514

>>17484009
Eat shit
>>17484041
She's artistic. Just not culinary artistic.
>>17484703
She does have epileptic dyslexia

>> No.17486524

>>17486514
so you have an ugly retarded daughter?

>> No.17486537

>>17486524
what did you expect from a 4channer? a beautiful family?

>> No.17486575

>>17486524
Sure
>>17486537
You'd be surprised

>> No.17486620

>>17481595
>what's the worst you've ever fucked up a recipe?
>>got high

Yup...

>> No.17487635

One time I was drunk/high and I made chicken breast that came out medium rare, and I just fucking ate it cause I was hungry and lazy. Washed it down with some vodka because I figured it’d kill the chicken bacteria. Never got sick either.