What do I do with this?

[Anonymous No.17405490]

[Anonymous No.17405504]

Enjoying viewing it.

Ain't it pretty?

[Anonymous No.17405507]

>>17405504
What should I cook it in. I'm planning broth so far.

[Anonymous No.17405569]

>>17405490
crim-cram-a-rino
crim-cram-a-roo

[Anonymous No.17405579]

>>17405507
Broth is good but frying them in a lot of butter may be even better

[Anonymous No.17405850]

I'll tell you what NOT to do with it. Don't get it went and don't feed it after midnight.

[Anonymous No.17405856]

>>17405490
throw it out and get shrooms instead

[Anonymous No.17405885]

>>17405490
Speak encouraging words to it.

[Anonymous No.17405896]

stick your peepee in there

[Anonymous No.17405901]

>>17405850
classic

[Anonymous No.17405908]

>>17405504
Fuck mushrooms (not literally). I'm growing more and more convinced of the theory that fungi might not actually be native to this planet.

[Anonymous No.17405910]

>>17405490
Holy shit you got a hairy type Bored Garloid? Fucking based bro I'll give you 10 ETH for that right now

[Anonymous No.17405922]

>>17405490
It's a mushroom. You just cook it like a mushroom and eat it, unless you wanna be some Chinese health fag and grind it into boner pills.

[Anonymous No.17405931]

>>17405908
>Hello, fellow species native to planet earth. So glad I wasn't imported by some space travelling extraterrestrials thousands of years ago, haha, wouldn't that be absolutely weird!

[Anonymous No.17405954]

>>17405931
Don't worry, I'm just like all of you!

[Anonymous No.17405961]

>>17405954
Those ones smell like poopy and rotting flesh to attract flies for spore dispersal, right?

[Anonymous No.17405970]

>>17405931
if this fascinates you you should check out the head shapes of the bosnian people

[Anonymous No.17405979]

>>17405961
Not that guy, but devil's fingers are supposed to smell like rotten flesh. There's only a single paragraph on them in wikipedia. Basically, creates egg, arm unfolds into tentacles, smells like death.

[Anonymous No.17405980]

>>17405908
nothing was native to this planet all the foundations of life came from asteroids

[Anonymous No.17405991]

>>17405908
That might be the case. I'm a firm believer in the stoned ape theory, some apes thousands of years ago ate too many shrooms and expanded their consciousness.

[Anonymous No.17405998]

>>17405970
What about them? Googled bosnian people and they all seem pretty normal to me.

[Anonymous No.17405999]

>>17405908
Fuck mushrooms (literally)

[Anonymous No.17406023]

>>17405999
You sound like a fungi.

[Anonymous No.17406025]

>>17405490
just sautee in butter and garlic, maybe you'd want to throw in shallots or onions too. slice it and treat it like it's a piece of seafood.

[Anonymous No.17406075]

>>17405970
In Italy, we say Croatians have cube-or-square-shaped heads.

[Anonymous No.17406152]

>>17406075
In the rest of the world we say Italians are black

[Anonymous No.17406217]

>>17406152
Well, we have very, very large genitalia so there may be some truth to it.

[Anonymous No.17406281]

>>17406217

[Anonymous No.17406597]

My cat produces three a day.

[Anonymous No.17406632]

>>17406597
How do you cook them?

[Anonymous No.17406920]

>>17406075
Ah yes, the old square-cube law.

[Anonymous No.17406938]

>>17405991
How would they pass that on that? How would that change their sex cells? Are you saying the stoned apes were more successful reproducively? Even so the selection pressure would only last as long as the mushrooms were available.

[Anonymous No.17407035]

>>17406938
Anyone who says "I'm a firm believer in the stoned ape theory" is just saying that "I watched a popular youtube video where they mentioned this bunk theory and I'm now hooked."

They are most likely Joe Rogan show watchers or Jordan Peterson-tier cretins.

[Anonymous No.17408452]

>>17407035
>They are most likely Joe Rogan show watchers or Jordan Peterson-tier cretins.
ywnbaw

[Anonymous No.17408494]

>>17405908
I think they very strange too. But cordyceps are even stranger.

[Anonymous No.17408560]

>>17405991
if this theory is true why did it only happen once thousands of years ago? apes are still a thing and shrooms are still a thing so why aren't apes continuously accidentally eating shrooms and discovering morality? shouldnt we see pockets of ape tribes throughout time and geography where apes ascended? it should still be happening

[Anonymous No.17408568]

>>17407035
What's wrong with watching Joe Rogan?

[Anonymous No.17408571]

>>17406075
this is true, our jaws are as wide as our shoulders

[Anonymous No.17408575]

>>17405991
That's retarded
>>17405908
That's retarded

[Anonymous No.17408580]

>>17408560
Because evolution takes tens of thousands of years and humans have already won the game for dominant species on the planet as of a few thousand years ago.

[Anonymous No.17408581]

>>17405490
Shove it up your ass

[Anonymous No.17408601]

>>17408580
so once one species wins the game of evolution everything else stops evolving? sounds like bs

[Anonymous No.17408607]

>>17408601
No, but we wiped out all evolving species that had the capacity to usurp us. You're an enlightened ape, anon, use your brain.

[Anonymous No.17408615]

>>17408601
Idiot

[Anonymous No.17408626]

>>17406152
And then there’s Sicilians, who are considered the niggers of Italians

[Anonymous No.17409069]

So has nobody, Italian or not, actually cooked lion's mane?

[Anonymous No.17409150]

>>17409069
I know this Ukrainian girl who goes mushroom hunting in NJ. Want me to ask her if she comes across them and, if so, what she does with them?

[Anonymous No.17409348]

>>17409150
That post was crafted solely for you to brag about being close with a Ukrainian girl, but yes I'd like details on LM preparations.

[Anonymous No.17409408]

>>17406152
why are you lying on /ck/?

[Anonymous No.17409415]

>>17405908
Just wait til you look in the ocean

[Anonymous No.17409425]

>>17405908
they just have different evolution rules
>>17408601
yes, we're absorbing all the earth's resources and our extreme intervention has stopped any natural development going on

[Anonymous No.17409428]

>>17408560
Apes are pretty damn smart, but we didn't come from them. We share a common ancestor. Idk why that's so hard to understand

[Anonymous No.17409429]

>>17409415
What kind of mushrooms grow there?

[Anonymous No.17409445]

>>17408560
because they still need to invent meat cooking, to evolve a brain you need to have tons of extra calories and raw vegetables arent caloric enough
they also need to change their society to favor cooperation and understanding instead of clashing and violence, so the individuals have peaceful free time to dedicate to their internal philosophy

[Anonymous No.17409472]

When this popped up yet again I sautéed it in butter with a few herbs. That is a pretty foolproof way to cook anything.

[Anonymous No.17409479]

>>17409348
I'm not really all that close to /that/ particular Ukrainian girl, but I guess I'm close enough that I have her number, we've shared meals and I last spoke to her a few weeks ago.
Also, don't worry about me knowing some Ukie. This one is very, very ugly. She looks like that Armenian bitch, Armine Harutyunyan, only far more sun-damaged, especially for her age. She's sweet as pie, but ugly as sin.
Now the /other/ Ukie girls I know? Yeah. Thems're some hot pieces of ass, right there.
Anyway, I'll ask her now and be back in a bit when she replies.

[Anonymous No.17409561]

>>17405490
C R A M
R
A
M

[Anonymous No.17409576]

>>17409429
The best ones

[Anonymous No.17409616]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SexR-As0164
Look they talk

[Anonymous No.17409619]

>>17405970
or how pure blood ashkenazi jews have similar bone structure to neanderthals

[Anonymous No.17409743]

>>17409479
>>17409348
Okay, so she said she just pan fries them as a side dish.

[Anonymous No.17409800]

>>17409743
She just sent pics of the most recent one she found and cooked.

[Anonymous No.17409811]

>>17409800

[Anonymous No.17409817]

>>17409811
>>17409800
Butter and oil, by the way, is what she fries them in.

[Anonymous No.17409857]

>>17409800
>>17409811
>>17409817
A girl isn't gonna send you her cooking pics on request like this unless she wants your dick or she thinks you're her gay bff. Sorry you have to have sex with her now, otherwise you're just leading her on.

[Anonymous No.17409940]

>>17409857
lol
Yeah, I'm her gay bff.

[Anonymous No.17410041]

>>17405507
>>17405490
I have tried many methods. Sauteing in butter is 100% the way to go. Cut it into thin strips and make sure to brown them entirely. If it's not caramelized entirely, it'll be meh, but the caramelized portions will taste like crab/lobster.
You will also need a LOT of butter. Last time I cooked one I needed a full stick.

[Anonymous No.17410266]

>>17405850
underrated

[Anonymous No.17410530]

>>17405490
Where the fuck do you get these things? I have literally never seen Lions Mane in person. Not even in any of the fancy supermarkets and organic health food stores. Do I need to grow them or what?

[Anonymous No.17410541]

>>17405490
eat it
it tastes good
goes good in a seafood gumbo

[Anonymous No.17410566]

>>17406938
There is probably some truth to the theory but that guy way oversimplified it to Spotify podcasts levels.
We have plenty of ancient evidence of psychotropic use among early humans but not dating back that far because evidence outside of carbon deposits and stone tools are incredibly rare.
The theory is more that psychedelic mushrooms are pretty much everywhere. It's inevitable that some early ancestor ate them at some time.
The actual theory is that it allowed us to jump into abstract thinking and could have lead to basic art and religion to try to cope with the crazy shit they saw after eating them. That type of psychotropic can also have some interesting results on our neural pathways.
It isn't that it caused us to evolve but could be the reason we initially began funeral rituals and the belief in gods.
And despite modern and views and some people's personal views on religion it served it's purpose in our evolution.
Shared beliefs allowed us to form relationships with groups larger than our family groups and tribes, people coming together with shared beliefs needed more food than small groups so we figured out agriculture. Those dicks in the valley over from us believes in some sanctimonious God that hates the stuff we like so we modified our hunting and farming tools to kill heathens better, heathens did the same so we figured out better ways to protect ourselves, this continues.
So it's not that mushrooms mutated us but more we tried to figure out a reason for it's effect on us

[Anonymous No.17410573]

>>17408494
Cordyceps freak me the fuck out. On the other hand I'd be lying if I said I haven't thought of ways to farm caterpillar cordyceps to swindle Chinese and stay at home mlm moms

[Anonymous No.17410583]

>>17408601
There isn't an end game of evolution. It doesn't work that way but we as a species have had pretty direct effects on the evolution of some species, some we have out right created. And we are technically fucking with our own evolution. The moment we were advanced enough to drastically reduce infant mortality made that so

[Anonymous No.17410603]

>>17405954
thats not a fucking shroom that an ayy lmao egg.

[Anonymous No.17410605]

>>17410530
Lions mane and bear tooth grow in parts of the US. Lots of other countries too.
I grow mine. Mushrooms are cheap food, not especially nutritious but a good filler, there are some benefits and if you have a decent setup are pretty easy to grow.
I have three different varieties going right now

[Anonymous No.17412591]

>>17410605
>i grow my own
>three varieties
Pics or it didn't happen, faggot.

[Anonymous No.17412824]

>>17405908
Ok retard.

[Anonymous No.17412861]

>>17405908
I thought the thumbnail was Yeezy until I opened it

[Anonymous No.17412905]

>>17405908
>I'm growing more and more convinced of the theory that fungi might not actually be native to this planet.
It's really not that weird if you knew some biology. Shit's pretty basic actually, skin and round blobs of fat is weirded than frills, buds and nets that cover your insides.

[Anonymous No.17413230]

>>17405850
Fucking hell I think some neurons that were asleep for a thousand years like Dracula just got an erection and it hurts like hell

[Anonymous No.17413395]

>>17407035
Don't forget your tenth booster, tranny

[Anonymous No.17413724]

How do I make this

[Anonymous No.17413745]

You often go mushroom picking, right, anon?

[Anonymous No.17413764]

>>17413745
aesthetic

[Anonymous No.17413801]

>>17405991
Bro even McKenna didn't really believe that. I believe in panpsychism and that we are all God and all that crap but you cannot evolve your brain chemistry over generations by eating shrooms.

[Anonymous No.17414553]

>>17409857
Friendship among adults can be platonic. I send my friends camping pictures when I'm out and about. That includes cooking foraged food. I don't have social media so I just share it with friends that are interested. I've gotten to take a few coworkers and other friends for their first camping trip since childhood thanks to sharing pictures.

But yeah that was funny as hell. Want to fuck?

[Anonymous No.17414869]

>>17405908
>I'm growing more and more convinced of the theory that fungi might not actually be native to this planet.
Retard.

[Anonymous No.17414890]

>>17413724
Similar to making any blue cheese.

[Anonymous No.17414904]

>>17413745
>You often go mushroom picking, right, anon?
Sadly it is not safe to do so here in South America due to a complete and total lack of reliable mushroom picking guides here.

[Anonymous No.17414925]

>>17414904
oh, really? that is sad. I imagine certain parts of Chile or Argentina might offer that possibility.

[Anonymous No.17415146]

Donate it to me please

[Anonymous No.17415164]

>>17414925
enjoy getting shot by a mapuche/gaucho for trespassing

[Anonymous No.17415173]

>>17415164
>comparing ethnic indigenous mapuches with based white gauchos

[Anonymous No.17415303]

>>17415173
both'll shoot you

[Anonymous No.17415624]

>>17405490
make "crab" cakes with it
it's suprisingly good.

[Anonymous No.17415672]

>>17415173
I guacho mapuche right here, bitch.
>:: motions towards crotch ::

[Anonymous No.17415885]

>>17412905
Yes the mycelium network of our earth is super basic. You fuckin dunce

[Anonymous No.17416799]

>>17415885
UUUOOOOOHHHH A NETWORK OF CELLS HOW ALIEN!!1! A BRAIN ADDAPTED TO A SEDENTIARY LIFESTYLE OH MY GOD!
Your smooth as fuck brain is the real otherwordly mystery here buddy.

[Anonymous No.17416821]

>>17405490
I eat shiitake and lions mane. I soak in simmering broth for an hour.

[Anonymous No.17416824]

>>17405490
Cram it in your anus

[Anonymous No.17416858]

>>17405490
i wish my skin looked like this so i can pull on each individual strand of skin and pluck pluck pluck peel peel peel every last bit of shredded tiny skin

[Anonymous No.17416996]

Here’s another, it’s called ‘dead man’s fingers’ haha

[Anonymous No.17417005]

>>17416858
you need help lol

[Anonymous No.17417059]

>>17416996
don't dead open inside

[Anonymous No.17417195]

>>17410566
Elephants also hold funerals.

[Anonymous No.17417267]

>>17408581
don't boof shrooms

[Anonymous No.17417745]

>>17413764
retard

[Anonymous No.17417767]

>>17413745
As much as i can fren

[Anonymous No.17418364]

>>17417267
Quiet or you're going up there too

[Anonymous No.17418705]

>>17416996
That is genuinely spooky

[Anonymous No.17419223]

>>17405954
looks like a half life enemy wtf

[Anonymous No.17419522]

Mushrooms are weird man

[Anonymous No.17419535]

>>17419522
There was something like that on the game Subnautica

[Anonymous No.17419553]

Look at this lil fella

[Anonymous No.17419588]

>>17419553
based mofo wondering how it tastes

[Anonymous No.17419592]

>>17419553
mirin this fella

[Anonymous No.17419882]

>>17417767
why did you do this?

[Anonymous No.17419951]

>>17410530
>Lions
They sell them at Asian grocery stores

[Anonymous No.17420140]

>>17419951
I shop at Asian stores all the time and have never seen any.
Only "wild" mushroom I ever see them sell fresh are wood ears, though they've a few more uncommon mushroom types dry. I put 'wild' in quotes because idk if they can be farmed or not.

[Anonymous No.17420147]

>>17413745
Beautiful forest. Where is it?

[Anonymous No.17420190]

>>17417195
True, and it's interesting to know whether it's because of their consumption of intoxicating substances (which is documented) or some other factor.
They do seem to have some higher cognitive functions, don't they?

[Anonymous No.17420254]

>>17413745
Why yes I do
I still have a few of these bad boys dried in my pantry

[Anonymous No.17420258]

>>17405999
>>17406023
SHROOM'D

[Anonymous No.17420301]

>>17405490
Please don't eat the tribbles, anon

[Anonymous No.17421725]

>>17405908
i saw these in Green Hell and when I ate them they made my guy sick

[Anonymous No.17422333]

>>17405490
Up the bum.

[Anonymous No.17422957]

What do I do with this?

[Anonymous No.17423651]

>>17422957
Is this the one where she gets blackmailed into giving a blowjob for a bottle of water?

[Anonymous No.17423661]

>>17405490
saw this growing in a toilet once
the way it's tentacles waved in the water made my skin crawl

[Anonymous No.17423668]

>>17406152
Italians are my favorite black people

[Anonymous No.17423684]

>>17422957
give it a happy and wholesome life
;_;

[Anonymous No.17424368]

>>17407035
kys trannoid

[Anonymous No.17424381]

>>17405954
Can you eat that?

[Anonymous No.17424404]

>>17419553
Can you put your penis in that hole?

[Anonymous No.17426044]

>>17423651

[Anonymous No.17427000]

>>17405908
>>17405931
>>17405954>>17405991

They're up to something.

[Anonymous No.17427004]

>>17405569
IS THAT A JOJO REFERENCE?!

[Anonymous No.17427009]

>>17405908
>>17405931
>>17405954
>>17405979
>>17405991
>>17416996
>>17419522
>>17419553
Is this thread where I can post some mushrooms I found?

[Anonymous No.17427014]

>>17427009

[Anonymous No.17427019]

>>17427014

[Anonymous No.17427024]

>>17427019

[Anonymous No.17427031]

>>17427024
Probably the only one of these that are edible

[Anonymous No.17427257]

>>17405504
I like you anon

[Anonymous No.17427294]

>>17413764
not really fag

[Anonymous No.17427297]

>>17422957
wait a minute...

[Anonymous No.17428701]

>>17409817
Those are not fucking done at all, still completely full of water. Please don't post gore.

[Anonymous No.17428713]

>>17412591
You know it's not hard right?

[Anonymous No.17428714]

>>17427009
Nice

[Anonymous No.17428762]

>>17408575
Fungal hands typed this post

[Anonymous No.17428783]

>>17416996
>>>/feet/

[Anonymous No.17428793]

>>17405908
Interesting thought experiment, only we can trace their genetic lineage back to a common ancestor.