/ck/ - Food & Cooking

[Anonymous No.17268596]

Are there any American hot sauces that don't suck? I bought a bottle of this, but it just tastes like salt and vinegar.

[Anonymous No.17268602]

>>17268596
Sriracha. Made by Thailand. Perfected by anyone intelligent enough to not give themselves botulism when fermenting at home.

[Anonymous No.17268618]

>>17268602
>Sriracha
Nah fuck that. It only pairs well with Asian foods.

[Anonymous No.17268626]

>>17268596
>american hotsauces
probably
>american-style
if you don't like pepper vinegar, probably not. i'm from LA and prefer Crystal, but I'm not gonna try to convince anyone our hotsauces taste that starkly different, and they are all vinegar based. if that's your issue, you're not going to like any of them.

[Anonymous No.17268639]

>>17268596
Sometimes I want the vinegar flavor . Other times I prefer something like Tapatio that doesn’t . I like Tabasco on eggs .

[Anonymous No.17268642]

>>17268596
Louisiana hot sauce tastes like salty vinegar to me too anon. The best hot sauce is Texas Pete

[Anonymous No.17268648]

>>17268618
False. You're letting arbitrary mental distinctions prevent you from experimenting with flavor. Sriracha is a good source of spice for any red sauce, gumbo bases, and even new condiments.

[Anonymous No.17268651]

>>17268626
crystal is even more just hot vinegar, pretty much anything from that region is going to be thin and simple like that, they're meant to just add a little tang to protein rich foods

[Anonymous No.17268658]

>>17268596
You want mexican hot sauce. Pic related, more "pure heat" not vinegar

[Anonymous No.17268660]

>>17268596
>buys the cheapest hot sauce
>surprised that it's just basic shit
theres thousands of hot sauces this isn't really an easy question to answer but go to a farmers market or something and test some sauces out.
also fuck sriracha and all the faggot hipsters that like that shit

[Anonymous No.17268665]

>>17268648
No, I've tried it on things like pizza, fries, eggs, hot dogs, etc. The only non Asian application I liked was hot dogs.

[Anonymous No.17268673]

>>17268658
I actually have some of their green and I like it. I want to try the chipotle, but I can't find it.

[Anonymous No.17268687]

>>17268673
Never had green hot sauce, I just got the regular red one. It's good, it just adds heat without altering the taste too much. I never liked those vinegary ones like tabasco

[Anonymous No.17268688]

[Anonymous No.17268710]

I like Crystal. Once its opened it gets better with age.

[Anonymous No.17268717]

>>17268596
Glad it's not just me, LA hot sauce is just too salty. I really like Crystal hot sauce tho, it has a slight sweetness to it, which marry really nice. But why the fuck is it not as available as LA, in freaking Alabama?!?!

[Anonymous No.17268718]

>>17268688
>t. gets blown out by black pepper

[Anonymous No.17268723]

>>17268710
I do prefer Crystal to this Louisiana stuff. I guess I didn't realize that spicy vinegar is just the Bayou style.

[Anonymous No.17268725]

>>17268687
I think El Yucateco has a lot of flavor, it's just that it's the taste of roasted chilis and not vinegar

The El Yacateco black stuff has chilis that are roasted black and it tastes like a dirty ashtray and if you look at it closely it's just ashes suspended in xanthan gum slime

[Anonymous No.17268730]

>>17268717
All the tabasco copycat sauces besides tabasco itself have fuckoff disgusting amounts of sodium in them to cover up how watered down they are.

[Anonymous No.17268733]

>>17268642
>Texas Pete
>Actually from the Carolinas

[Anonymous No.17268748]

>>17268723
I am from Now Zealand and I am only familiar with Crystal and Tabasco.
Crystal >>> Tabasco

[Anonymous No.17268752]

>>17268648
nah. it tastes like shit on western food. sriracha on burgers? fries? meh, it's shit compared to the conventional sauces. is it terrible? no. but is it good? no. it's almost as if regional spices work better on regional foods because cultures have been experimenting for years...

[Anonymous No.17268757]

>>17268723
>pepereee

[Anonymous No.17268759]

>>17268602
What do you mean by this? We should be making our own sriracha?

[Anonymous No.17268760]

>>17268723
>I do prefer Crystal to this Louisiana stuff
Wait, hold up. Crystal is Louisiana Hot sauce. Did you just pull some Hattian voodoo magic on me?

[Anonymous No.17268765]

>>17268760
I meant the Louisiana brand in OP. Sorry, I wasn't exactly Crystal clear.

[Anonymous No.17268778]

>>17268759
Do you see a sign above my house that says homemade sirracha storage?

[Anonymous No.17268780]

Bravado's Black Garlic Reaper is one of my new favorites. I also liked Torchbearer's Garlic Reaper. I mean, mostly I just like garlic, but if you don't want something that tastes like vinegar don't get hot sauces that have practically nothing in them besides vinegar, water, and cayenne.

[Anonymous No.17268786]

>>17268778
Thank you. I'll get to work.

[Anonymous No.17268797]

>>17268759
Yes. I mean you should to take the plunge, put in the minimal effort to make sriracha, and adjust to your taste.

[Anonymous No.17268805]

>>17268596
Crystal is my daily.

[Anonymous No.17268823]

>>17268596
any gulfcoast/LAfags itt know the name of a sauce made in Louisiana that is really garlic heavy, like the base is cayenne and then garlic and onion juice. it advertised being good on everything and it fucking was. it had a unidentifiable crudely drawn brown animal dressed in a little chef hat and apron on the lable.

[Anonymous No.17268837]

found it. OP try this

[Anonymous No.17268842]

>>17268837
Neat, thanks.
>Makes a brown gravy
what

[Anonymous No.17268854]

>>17268602
Cock sauce is the most popular brand and it's made in good old USA by an immigrant entrepreneur from 'nam.

>>17268759
We already do.

[Anonymous No.17268877]

[Anonymous No.17268889]

>>17268842
cajuns are illiterate forest people just dont read the text you'll be fine

[Anonymous No.17268947]

>>17268842
>>17268889
>ewww browning your roux makes it taste like something other than salt and pepper
Mommy never weened you off of chicken nuggies, huh?

[Anonymous No.17268956]

>>17268947
Browning a roux is cooking the flower, not adding some retard sauce, retard.

[Anonymous No.17269054]

>>17268956
So you're blaming the sauce because the only reading you have of the word "make" is "to serve as the sole ingredient or step in producing something"?

[Anonymous No.17269072]

I don't even own black pepper, hot sauce is for fags

[Anonymous No.17269078]

>>17269054
What are you even talking about? You made some pretentious statement about not knowing how cooking flour in butter works.

[Anonymous No.17269083]

>>17269078
I'm talking about your reading comprehension. Not gonna waste all day discussing your wrong opinion with you, though.
>pretentious
Nigger, this whole discussion is predicated on you being a pick me ass bitch over strangers' use of some cheap cajun sauce.

[Anonymous No.17269088]

>>17269083
I've literally never heard of that garlic sauce before today. What the fuck dude. It's not like it's a famous Cajun meme like Tony Chachere.

[Anonymous No.17269108]

Fuck you, I like it

[Anonymous No.17269160]

>>17269088
Lmao okay cooklet

[Anonymous No.17270096]

>>17268596
that being 2/3 ingredients i'm fairly confident that's what it's supposed to taste like

[Anonymous No.17270485]

>>17268596
Nope. Buy Valentina

[Anonymous No.17270555]

you niggas sleeping on this stuff

[` No.17270596]

I'm gonna make my own hot sauce

[Anonymous No.17270660]

This stuff is pretty good .

[Anonymous No.17270673]

>>17268956
>flower
>retard sauce
incredible the absolute state of /ck/

[Anonymous No.17270783]

>>17269108
me too

[Anonymous No.17270793]

Crystal, Tabasco Habanero, Tabasco Chipotle are the best American made sauces available most places IMO.

Lots of dumb motherfuckers in here suggesting Asian and Latin stuff, OP asked for American sauces.

[Anonymous No.17270798]

>>17270660
based Chalulachad.

[Anonymous No.17270811]

>>17268596

You asked the question. And so now, you must bear the burden of unforgettable knowledge. Prepare yourself. You are about to enter an elite brotherhood. Allow me to paint you a picture of a day in the 'Vark Life:

>go to fancy restaurant
>order expensive food & wine
>survey available condiments
>sigh loudly, snap fingers to summon waiter
>Excuse me, boy, may I see your hot-sauce menu?
>"I'm sorry, sir, but we don't have one."
>Well, I already know what I want anyway. Fetch the Secret Aardvark, chop-chop.
>"The what, sir?"
>Se-cret Aard-vark? You know, the world's premier sauce?
>"Pardon me, sir, but I don't think we have that."
>Ah, so you ran out. That does tend to be a problem. You should inform your sauce-melier immediately. But fortunately... (wink & smile, reach inside jacket)... I always carry my own.

It's important to have this conversation loud enough for all patrons to hear.

Leave the bottle on the table with the logo facing outward. Before each bite, make a big show of opening the bottle, extracting a single drop of "red gold", and closing the bottle with a loud snap. Also frequently exclaim (to no one in particular) "Mmmm mmmm! That's my 'Vark!"

If anyone looks over, be sure to smile, wink, and hold up the bottle, in case they want to take a picture for social media. Of course you'll also want to get your own photo showing the bottle next to your meal and yourself leaning in, mouth agape at the zesty spice. (Don't forget to tag #varklife! One lucky winner this month will get a limited-edition Secret Aardvark® Nintendo Switch!™)

Last but not least, when paying the bill, on the "tip" line, write:

>'Vark goes great on 'za! :^)

In the #varklife, we call that a Coup d'Vark. #AlwaysVarkin

[Anonymous No.17270820]

>>17270811

[Anonymous No.17270831]

>>17270820

Mods are alseep, IT'S VARKIN' TIME

[Anonymous No.17270835]

>>17270831

[Anonymous No.17270840]

>>17270811
>red

[Anonymous No.17270843]

>>17270835

[Anonymous No.17270851]

>excuse, my dear waitress, but might I perchance take a gander at your hot sauce menu?
>...yes, "hot sauce menu." That is what I inquired about.
>You... don't... have one? Well, while that is truly disappointing for an establishment as esteemed as this, thankfully I always carry a choice selection of my rather vast collection with me at all times.
*loud SCRRRTCCHHing of velcro as a fanny pack is opened*
>Hmmm yes, let's see... Perhaps some "Napalm Diarrhea" for this meal? No, I think the garlicy twinge of "Captain McGoober's Ass-Ripping Lava Farter Sauce" would pair quite well with my entree. Or is it finally the day that "5 Alarm Anus Melting Hot Sauce" will make its debut...?
>Ah, the dilemmas of a connoisseur! Be that as it may; what are your IPA offerings, my sweet?

[Anonymous No.17270868]

>>17270843
This is a fairly small amount of Secret Aardvark for a person of average heat tolerance, I'd say? The main reason 'Vark tastes so good and "lasts" so short is that it's the premier American hot sauce, made from premium ingredients with love in Portland 3>. I wouldn't WANT to eat a day's whole 1/2 gallon ration at one meal, but I could easily.

[Anonymous No.17270873]

>>17270868

[Anonymous No.17270877]

Lay off the hot sauces guys. Oldfag (31) here. I now have permanent GERD. And will probably get esophageal cancer later in life.

[Anonymous No.17270925]

>>17270793
Imma double down then Mama Tere's Sauce from Ecuador... you can get it at any beaner isle in spanish stores. Ive found it even in a Stop N Shop..... you like Cholula.... worship your new god

[Anonymous No.17270930]

>>17268596
salt, vinegar and cayenne pepper. shits good. thats what i want my hotsuace to taste like.

[Anonymous No.17270938]

>>17268658
i start to sweat when i look at this bottle

t. spic

[Anonymous No.17270953]

>>17270925
OP: Are there any American hot sauces that don't suck?

You: Durrrrr Ecuador...

[Anonymous No.17270960]

>>17270660
WRONG

[Anonymous No.17270970]

#1 >>17270660
#2 >>17268642

[Anonymous No.17270973]

>>17270960
In what way ? I enjoyed it’s flavor .

[Anonymous No.17270976]

Enter.

[Anonymous No.17270977]

>>17270877
ayo this nigga got GERD!!!

[Anonymous No.17270979]

>>17270660

Based. Try the garlic one too.

[Anonymous No.17270981]

>>17270976
Just a shittier valentina

[Anonymous No.17270986]

>>17268642
This shit isn't even spicy. It's the equivalent of wing sauce.

[Anonymous No.17270993]

>>17270660
I have all the flavors, but this stuff is made in mexico

[Anonymous No.17271191]

For vinegar hot sauce, Tapatio is my favorite

Otherwise I like Yellowbird Habanero

[Anonymous No.17271202]

>>17268596
Mayonnaise

[Anonymous No.17271213]

Ill never understand why hot sauce is the only condiment that gets shit on in a fucking food board.

Is it cause of Hot Ones having celebrities try hot sauce wings and that brings in the normies into your "food hobby" so you have to post soy faces constantly?

[Anonymous No.17271255]

>>17271213
It's a meme. Now just wait a minute, and someone will quote both our posts with a soyjack.

[Anonymous No.17271260]

>>17271213
>>17271255

[Anonymous No.17271270]

>>17271260

[Anonymous No.17271277]

>>17271270

[Anonymous No.17271280]

A true American hot sauce

[Anonymous No.17271291]

>>17271255
Could at least pick some dumb shit like Salad Creme or something to make fun of

[Anonymous No.17271310]

>>17271280
Yeah, it's dece. More sodium than a lot of other sauces, but sometimes that extra saltiness just works naymsayin. And it's thicker than those watery Louisiana sauces, sticks better to shrimp, wings, etc. And of course it does have a bit of that based Old Bay flavor. Try it on 'za, saucefam.

[Anonymous No.17271314]

>>17270877
Think it depends on genetics. Also I think the vinegar does a lot worse for your stomach than the capsaicin

[Anonymous No.17271320]

>>17271291
That doesn’t sound good at all .

[Anonymous No.17271333]

>>17271291
If you really don't know, the meme's basis is Redditors who started "collecting" hot sauce like Funkopop dolls, and of course posting staged photos for internet points. Pic related. (A key distinction, which a lot of people miss, is that most of those bottles are clearly unopened. Having a dozen sauces in your pantry, even "artisanal" sauces ordered online, is not cringe if you actually use them.)

[Anonymous No.17271345]

>>17271333
I like that one hot sauce that says Cock but its the Coke font

[Anonymous No.17271448]

>>17271333
>no crystal
>no louisiana
>no vark
>tabasco is opened
this was meant to get someone's goat

[Anonymous No.17271787]

Nothing like a good dollop of Tabasco to get me going

[Anonymous No.17272279]

Crystal is a pretty solid generic American hot sauce. I’m a tapatio guy myself tho